Chapter 6: Thoughtless

-December 24th, 6:00 AM-

I opened my eyes to see my clock reading 6:00 AM.

"It's time." I said quietly as to not wake up Charlie. I equipped my cloak and pant and started to head out.

"Again? Don't you think you're strong enough already? you've been at it for almost ten days straight now." Charlie said as i glanced back. she was sitting up in bed her hair was covering half her face.

"It's not that i'm not strong enough it's that i have to be the strongest."

"I know you're still hurting because of Ryuk's death but doing this is suicide especially alone."

"I'm doing this alone because i don't want any of you to get hurt."

"So instead you'll bare all the pain and tragedy?"

"yes." All i heard in response was a sigh from her. i started heading for the door when i heard the sound of sheets being moved. i looked back and saw her getting out of bed. I continued to the door. I had opened it halfway she put her hand on it stopping it. I looked at her with no expression on my face. it was getting harder to feel anything but anger and hatred as the days went by.

"I've let you do this by yourself for nine days now, that's long enough if you're going to keep this up then i'm coming with you." She said poking me in the chest to emphasise what she was saying.

"And if i say no."

"I'll follow you weather you like it or not."

"I'm much faster than you though."

"I'll look on the map."

"And if I block you."

"I'll get Kallen or Nyssa involved in this as well."

"Fine." I said defeated a small smile coming to my face. We walked out of the inn onto the floor of Lobria the main town of the fourth floor. I Had missed the third floor boss because I was in dungeons too often to get word of the date.

-December 24th, 12:00 PM-

"Don't you think this is enough for the day? we've been fighting for six hours straight now." Charlie asked after the tenth dead end and thirtieth fight.

"No. Not yet, maybe in a few more hours." I replied as i walked back the way we had come.

"Can we at least take a break i don't have your dexterity stat."

"Fine. let's get back to a safe zone though." I said annoyed that we had to stop.

"How far?"

"Azazel how far?" I asked. immediately a crow landed on my shoulder.

"About nine-hundred yards you also have five more Treant's in the way."

"Thanks scout for players when we get there." and with that he flew off into the shadows. we walked for a while before encountering the Treants. Treants are easy to fight especially if you have a high speed stat like charlie and i did. We rinsed through them and made it to the safe zone in thirty minutes. A minute later Azazel landed on my shoulder.

"There's only one other person here but he's still at the beginning and will take him a while before he gets here."

"Thanks you can go if you want to now. Please check if the player is close every now and then."

"Will do. I think i'll go take a nap. call me if you need anything. Goodbye Charlie."

"Goodbye Azazel." Charlie responded with a smile. with that Azazel once again flew off into the shadows.

"So what level are you?" I asked.

"15. you?" She said looking at her hud

"17. God i'm hungry." I said looking through my inventory and remembering i forgot to buy supplies this morning.

"Oh… i brought lunch." Charlie said opening her menu and then pulling out two sandwiches.

"When did you get these?" i asked bewildered, she hadn't left my side since we partied up this morning.

"Last night." she responded a sly smile on her face.

"You've planned this out?"

"Yes. Yes i have." she said matter of factly.

"So what's next in your plan then."

"You tell me how you met John." The somewhat happy mood i was in dissapeared with that statement. A fresh wave of guilt and sadness washed over me.

"Why do you want to know?" I said in a hollow tone.

"You never have told me so i'm interested and i'm hoping this will help you work through some of the issue's you're going through."

"You're not gonna take no for an answer by any chance will you."

"Nope." She said leaning on my shoulder to get comfortable. Her way of saying you're not moving until i'm happy with your answer.

"Fine. we first met when we were in Middle school."

-September 21st, 2016-

It was the second week of school. the second week of a new school where i knew no one. It was also the fourth week since my dad died. I was still upset by it and closed off from everyone else. even my teacher was starting to worry.

"Jason can you come here?" My Sixth grade teacher Ms. Blue called out. I walked over while everyone else did the ever so annoying ooooooh you're in trouble.

"Don't worry you're not in trouble or anything i just wanted to ask how you were doing, i know going to a new school is difficult."

"I'm fine." I lied both to her and to myself. nothing hurts more than knowing you're alone, so i told myself i wasn't, hopping i would eventually believe myself.

"Also your mom called she said to let you know you're to take the bus to your grandma's house. also your violin came in today so i'm gonna send you down to meet the orchestra teacher and get it okay?" i merely nodded in reply. on the inside i was a little sad all i wanted to do today was go home be alone and play some video games. now i had to not only go pick up an instrument i didn't want in the first place, but also go to my grandparents house where they shunned the mere use of a phone for anything other than calling someone.

"Do you know how to get there on your own?" I shook my head no, no one had bothered to show the new kid where the orchestra room was.

"Alright let me get someone then… John could you come here please." Another kid walked over. he was slightly taller than me with dark skin and short black hair.

"Jason here is going to be joining you in the orchestra so I was wondering if you could show him the way orchestra room to pick up his violin today?"

"Sure, might as well get to know him if he's joining the orchestra." The kid replied with a mischievous smile on his face.

"And no detour or getting "lost" again." She said using finger quotes when she said lost.

"Why i'd never willingly go somewhere i wasn't supposed to."

"Then why did the teachers catch you in the faculty lounge the other day."

"I… was looking for the bathroom i swear."

"Of course just make sure it doesn't happen again." she said a small smile on her face.

"Okay." He said sounding both defeated and happy, and with that we left.

"Okay follow me." he said i nodded even though he wasn't looking. we started walking taking a few turns eventually i recognized where we were going, the lunchroom.

"But Ms. Blue said not to go anywhere that wasn't the orchestra room." I protested upon reaching the doors to the lunchroom.

"Jason right… are you seriously gonna live doing everything that the person in charge says? Either way as long as she doesn't find out we'll be fine." he said while entering the room and getting online with some fruit snacks he grabbed passing by. Not knowing what to I joined him. he looked at me and sighed.

"If you're gonna do this you gotta do it right you can't look nervous like you aren't supposed to be here act natural. Just act like me." He said while going to lean on the wall. i tried to mimic him but felt weird and out of place. He looked at me again and sighed once more.

"If you're gonna be like that then just go wait by the bathroom or something i don't wanna get caught just because you look nervous." He said with a tone of disappointment. I left him and waited by the door to the bathroom across the hall. A minute later he came back with two bags of snacks.

"Here." He said handing the second bag to me.

"Why?" I asked taking it from him.

"Consider it payment for waiting and for not telling Ms. Blue about this." I smiled and thanked him for it. We started walking again.

"Anyways we're gonna have to work on your acting later." He said as we reached a turn.

"Why?"

"Because lessons are once a week and were the only violinists in Ms. Blue's class."

"Oh. I see." At least i would know one person in orchestra. We got to the room, grabbed our instruments and looked for the teacher but he wasn't there. John shrugged his shoulders and we headed back to class. we got back without interruption.

"Any troubles?" Ms. Blue asked when we got back.

"Everything went perfectly right Jason?" Ryuk answered with a big grin.

"Yes." Just the one word made Ms. Blue smile. I had gone from being silent to speaking even if it was just one word.

"And you boy's went straight there and nowhere else right Jason?" She said looking at me. I could see John in the corner of my a look of pleading on his face. He was to focused on me to see Ms. Blue was looking at him as well, but she hadn't said anything yet.

"Yes straight there and back." I finally said as calmly as I could. Ms. Blue smiled at that.

"Good, now back to your seats and pack up the schools almost over." We walked back and packed up. ten minutes later I was on the bus heading to my grandparents.

"YELLER ROAD." The bus driver called out as we approached the road my grandparents lived on. I got up and off as the bus stopped.

"HEY WAIT UP." I heard someone call out. i turned around to see John Walking towards me.

"You live here too? cool gives us time to work on your acting. Which house?" He asked smiling.

" My grandparents live in that one." I pointed to the first house on the left of the street.

"Cool. I live a few houses down. I'll come knock when i'm done with my homework." He said walking away.

"Okay." I said smiling turning to walk down the driveway. An hour later I had finished and was reading a book when my Grandma called me.

"Jason your friends here." I put the book down and ran to the door.

"Alright let's go work on your acting." He said while we walked to the yard. we spent the day messing around with stupid scenarios and acting them out. eventually my mom came to get me.

"Who's your friend Jason?" She asked as i got in the car.

"His name's John. Can I come here tomorrow?" I asked hoping for a yes.

"Sorry but we have plans for tomorrow. remember it's your sister's birthday."

"Ugh… Why didn't she have to come here?" I asked.

"Because you're eleven and she's sixteen." She answered as if it was the millionth time she had answered which it probably was.

"But you can come back next week." She said smiling that i wanted to go again.

"Thanks." i said the biggest smile on my face. And so I began to hang out with John after that day. and every week i would go over and we would "Practice" our acting. By the end of the month he had deemed good enough to stand in line with him on the way to orchestra. It was three months after that got into my first fight.

"What the fuck are you doing?" I looked up to see Andrew the school bully looking at me. it was recess and I was sitting under a tree reading manga. John was talking with Shawn another friend of his.

"It's called Manga." I answered going back to my book.

"Looks Fuckin Stupid." He said ripping the book from my hands.

"HEY GIVE THAT BACK!" I yelled getting up. the yelling caught the Attention of John, but we were too far away for any teachers to hear me.

"Why? What are you gonna do about it?" He taunted holding the book just above my reach.

"Please that was a gift from my dad." I pleaded.

"Oh your dad gave it to you then here i'm so sorry." He said while holding the book out for me.

"Thank you." I said relieved. As soon as I reached for it though he pulled it back away.

"Haha psyche." He said

"Please." I pleaded once again as tears started to swell up in my eyes.

"Oh are you gonna cry?" He asked seeing the tears.

"Haha. That's fucking precious." he said laughing at my misery.

"That's enough Andrew give it back to him." John had come over with Shawn after seeing what had happened. Andrew put a finger to his chin in thought.

"Nah. now it's enough." I watched in horror as he started tearing the pages out of the book. Finally i snapped and lunged at him which was exactly what he wanted. He dropped the book and moved out of the way sticking a leg out causing me to trip and land on my face. I got up and charged again. this time when he moved i turned and tackled him. We had begun to attract the attention of some of the kids in the area. We began to struggle to get on top. He being much bigger than me won and got on top. he started to hit me anywhere he could. once my face then when i brought my hands up to protect myself he switched to my chest, then my sides. Just as he was getting ready to hit my face again he was knocked off of me by someone else. I looked over and saw John had tackled him and was now punching him. I got up and limped slowly over, I couldn't feel my left leg. By the time I reached him he had a look of pure hatred in his eyes. Andrew was on the ground trying to defend himself, his face was covered in blood. I had calmed down enough to know Andrew had had enough.

"John stop he's had enough." I said putting an arm on his shoulder to pull him off. He turned at me with a fist raised. It took him a few seconds to realise who i was he lowered his fist and got off andrew who backed away as far as he could as quickly as he could. I went to pick up what was left of my book. John followed and picked up the pages Andrew had ripped out.

"We'll Tape them in later." He said picking up the last one.

"Thanks."

-December 24th, 2022 5:00 PM-

"And that's how he became my best friend." I finished my story with charlie now resting her head on my legs."

"I had no idea he was that defensive of his friends." Charlie said stunned.

"Why did you think he killed himself for me?"

"I don't know… I guess he thought he would survive the hit." She answered a few second later after thinking about it bit.

"No he was just that defensive of his friends. Odds are if Kallen had been in the same situation he would have done the exact same thing." I said smiling, remembering what he had been like.

"I see why you two were close. you guys are so similar. You're incredibly defensive of your friends as well."

"I learned from the best." I responded.

"Even the killing yourself part too." She said getting up and looking at me.

"What?" I asked confused and angered.

"John Killed himself trying to save his friend. now you're out here by yourself leveling up to protect your friends. Do you really think that's what he would've wanted?" She asked

"OF COURSE IT IS!"

"EVEN IF YOU DIE IN RETURN!" She yelled.

"I DON'T CARE IF I DIE!"

"WHAT WOULD DO YOU THINK THE REST OF US WANT FOR YOU?" she asked

"I DON'T CA-" Before I could finish i was smacked hard across the face.

"That's just it you're not thinking about what everyone else is going through, hell you're not even thinking about what John would have wanted." she said with tears in her face.

"You're not thinking about what i'd be like if you did die." I hate it when she's right. I hadn't been thinking at all, realization hit me that she was right. Before I could say anything she pulled out a blue crystal.

"Teleport LOBRIA." She called out crushing the crystal with tears in her face.

"WAIT CHARLIE I'M SORRY." I said getting quieter because she was already gone. I sat down and waited for a minute.

"You know you're kind of an asshole." A voice said to my left. I looked over it was Kirito.

"Yeah I know how much did you hear?"

"Everything starting at Andrew the dick."

"Damn it Azazel." I said under my breath, I swear i could hear him laughing.

"You Should Apologize."

"Yeah but how? That's the real problem." I said lost in thought about how I could make it up to her this time.

"That's Easy." He said a with small chuckle.

"I'm sorry did I miss something? How is it easy, i royally screwed up this time?" I asked confused. he looked at me strangely.

"You do know what today is right?"

"Thursday right?" He face palmed at my answer. After a minute he recovered himself.

"It's Christmas eve moron." He said as if i was in idiot, which at this point even i thought i was.

"Shit." I said confirming the date with my hud.

"Just being with her tonight means you're asking for her forgiveness." He said walking off, despite his choice of weaponry he really was a smart guy actually.

"Shit I gotta get back." I reached for a crystal but found myself out of them. I looked around for Kirito but he was already gone. I started running in the direction of the entrance. I made it relatively easily in about two hours. It took another hour to get back to town. I ran for the inn stopping only to buy some flowers, a katana, two rapiers, a twin sword and a war axe. I made it back to the inn at eight thirty. I walked to mine and Charlie's room and knocked on the door using the flowers to cover my face.

"Who is it?" Charlie asked.

"Delivery for Charlie." I said doing my best NPC impression. A few seconds later she opened the door. I lowered the flowers. She was still pissed.

"I'm sorry for what I put you and the others through, And you're right this isn't what John would have wanted."

"I'm glad you're sorry." The anger subsided from her face replaced by joy.

"So… can i come in now?" she rolled her eyes.

"Yes but one other thing." I got prepared for another smack. I got it.

"That's for being an asshole. And this is for the apology and the flowers."

I was genuinely and happily surprised when she leaned over and kissed me on the cheek.

"Just the cheek?"

"I'm still angry with you, just less so now."

"Thanks." I said exhausted. minutes later i was in bed asleep. I woke up the next day at nine. charlie was already awake and eating breakfast.

"Thanks for letting me sleep." I said groggily.

"No problem you needed it. So what are your plans for today, off to fight some more?" She asked hope in her voice.

"No, I think i'm done with the fighting for a while. Today i'm gonna hand out the gifts I bought then spend the rest of the day with my beautiful girlfriend." I said hugging her from behind and resting my chin on her head.

"Have I ever told you how much I love you?" she asked smiling. she was just happy that i was out of harm's way for a while.

"Almost everyday, and Merry Christmas."