AN: I post this so soon after chap 5 because I felt bad about leaving you with a cliffhanger.

Chapter 6 – "Back off, mine!"

"Dib: Why did you choose me?

Meekrob: You're the worthiest, Dib. And no one else had a head large enough to accommodate such power." (Dib's wonderful life of doom)

'A Kribliss? What's a Kribliss?' asked Dib, trying to keep up with Kinn, who was practically running in the Squeaky's corridors, pulling on his chain.

'Something that can get us all into humongous trouble,' she answered with a nervous voice. 'Thank the Tallest I didn't cut you open after all.'

'Wait, I don't understand,' he panted. 'What…'

She stopped and sharply turned around.

'Kribliss. It means "Back off, mine!"' she explained in a hurried voice. 'Zim marked you as his Kribliss.'

'But wha…? How could he? We aren't even…'

'It doesn't matter what you are exactly!' she exclaimed. 'You could be his lover, his friend, or in this case, his sworn enemy, all this is secondary! The only thing that matters here is that you are basically his, and no one else's! You're his to mate or to hurt or even to kill!'

She turned around and started jogging again. Dib had a hard time following, she could walk fast for such a small being.

'Marking someone as a Kribliss is an old tradition, very rare nowadays,' she explained while turning a corner. 'It demands an emotional attachment that not a lot or Irkens want to commit to.'

'Emotional attachment?!?' exclaimed an incredulous Dib. 'Yeah right, he just did it so he alone could be the one to kill me and win our stupid fight!'

'The motives do not matter, human,' she repeated. 'Having a Kribliss is a serious business. Zim can kill you, yes, but in the meantime he has to make sure nobody else does!'

'I still don't get what the fuss is all…'

'Holy Irk, you humans are slow!' groaned Kinn. 'That means he protects you from everyone else! And has probably done it for as long as you've had his marking!'

Dib came to an abrupt halt. Kinn felt the chain pulling and faltered.

'What?' she snapped with impatience.

'How old is this tattoo, do you know?' he asked in a small voice.

'The computer said it was made more than five years ago, why?' she said with a "We don't have time for this!" expression.

'…Five years?' he muttered.

It couldn't be. Five years ago, he was still a child. It was the very beginning of their war. It was… It was too much information at the same time! What was Zim thinking? Having messed up kinky sexual fights with him, marking him as his possession, this was too much to take all at once!

'That fucker,' he muttered.

'Don't pass judgment too fast,' warned Kinn. 'Being a Kribliss is the highest mark of respect and recognition you can get from an Irken. It means marking you as his equal. Irken Kribliss are very rare, but extra-Irken ones? Almost nonexistent. I wouldn't be surprised if you were the only one alive right now.'

Dib stared at a wall, unable to meet her orange stare. This was going too fast, he needed more time to process all this. The realization that Zim turned him on was a very troubling one, but he could get his mind around that. He had obsessed over the alien for years and he was a normal healthy teenage boy, no surprises there. But the fuzzy warm feeling that started from his belly to heat his cheeks when he heard about the recognition and respect, that was a reaction he hadn't expected!

'Come on, human, we don't have time for your inner turmoil right now!' said Kinn pulling frantically at the chain.

'What's all the trouble?' wondered Dib, jogging alongside her.

'We captured you, that's the problem,' groaned the scientist. 'He has full rights to attack us, Irken laws are very strict on that. If we defend ourselves, we risk imprisonment.'

'And what if you've had dissected me?'

'He could chop us up directly in front of the Tallest and they would probably help him,' she moaned. 'It's that bad.'

Dib gulped. He wasn't sure on who's side he was at the moment.

A door opened in front of them. They entered the bridge. Dib sighed with relief upon seeing trees trough the windshield. They were still on Earth.

The Captain was hunched behind the pilot's chair, her claws digging inside the headrest material. A low growl was coming from her. Further away, Diplomat Blo was typing at a nearby console and nodded a greeting.

'…Er… Captain?' asked timidly Kinn.

'What?' she snapped.

'I've got some news,' she said, pulling Dib forward.

The Captain turned around and practically hissed upon seeing Dib. He stopped himself from hiding behind the small scientist.

"Do not show fear," he told himself. "This is me without fear. Shirtless and handcuffed on an alien spaceship. Way to go, Dib."

'Why did you bring the Earthanoid?' she hissed towards Kinn.

'…Did Blo give you the message?' she asked with a little panicked voice.

'Yes,' growled Taty. 'I know that both our ships were damaged, that my crew was hurt and that MY PILOT was taken over a simple MISUNDERSTANDING!' she shouted.

Dib felt Kinn hiding behind him. Thanks a lot for the support, he thought sarcastically.

'Now I do hope that your news are going to help us retrieve Miik and accelerate the repairs on the Squeaky,' said the Captain in a menacing tone.

'Hem… Not exactly…' she trailed off. 'I can come back later, if you want, my Captain…'

'TELL. ME. NOW.'

Kinn hesitated, exchanged a look with Blo, who shrugged. Dib was feeling her nervousness and wasn't fearing well himself. The Irken captain was shooting daggers at him. She seemed ready to impale him with her spider legs at any moment.

'ThehumanisZim'sKribliss,' muttered the scientist, hiding further behind Dib.

Taty's eyes narrowed even more. She took a moment to digest the news and let out a deep menacing growl towards the human.

'For my defense, I wasn't aware of it!' he said in a hurry. 'Your scientist told me all of this right now.'

Taty shot him a disgusted look and turned around to regain her initial position by the pilot's chair. She closed her eyes, thinking, while caressing the headrest on an almost loving manner. A moment of silence went by.

'We can work with this,' she muttered finally. 'Blo, open a communication with Zim's base.'

The Diplomat obeyed and stepped back, watching curiously all the while.

The main screen lit up, displaying Zim's very angry face. Dib couldn't help the flutter of relief and something else he'd rather not think about at the moment that went by him.

'YOU!' snapped the Invader. 'You dare attack the almighty ZIM?!?'

'Shut your mouth, food drone!' snapped the Captain. 'You were the one that attacked us!'

'You were trespassing on Zim's planet!'

'The Earth was never yours!' shouted Dib from the back.

All heads turned towards him.

'DIB?!?' shrieked Zim. 'What are you doing on the enemy's ship? What's taking you so long, pitiful human? Hurry up and come back to the base already!'

'You idiot!' snapped Dib. 'I'm being help prisoner here!'

Zim seemed taken aback and noticed the handcuffs and the chain for the first time. He narrowed an eye seeing the naked torso, but snapped back to reality upon realizing something. He turned slowly towards the Captain.

'You have made a enormous error,' he said in a low menacing voice. 'No one takes what is mine.'

'You took something of mine, too,' said Taty in a cold tone.

Zim smirked and changed the camera angle so everyone could see the goo-filled tube behind him. There was Miik, looking very angry but safe nonetheless. Zim pressed a button and the goo emptied out, leaving a wet and pissed off pilot glaring at him.

'I propose an exchange,' said the Captain, relieved to see her pilot intact.

'Their values are not equivalent,' growled Zim.

'I know it,' snapped the Captain. 'But they will be.'

She stood straight, gripping the chair in her gloved hand and staring straight at her pilot all the while.

'Before witnesses, I am marking the Irken Miik, pilot for the Empire, as my Kribliss,' she said solemnly.

All the other Irken present gasped. Dib was having a hard time keeping up. Zim was about to retort something, but was distracted by Miik gesturing frantically at him and pointing the speakers. Curious, he pressed the button to let her speak. She turned around and stared directly at Taty, emotion clear on her face.

'Taty…' she muttered.

The Captain smiled a bit, unsure and nervous about the situation.

'YOU BETTER NOT BE BLUFFING ABOUT THIS!' screeched Miik. 'IF YOU ARE, TALLEST HELP ME I'M GONNA CUT YOU IN SO MANY PIECES THEY'RE GOING TO FIND YOUR RESTS ON EVERY ASTEROID FROM HERE TO BLORCH!'

'I am not bluffing,' replied calmly Taty. 'It is real.'

Miik frowned, then let a snicker escape.

'Then you better get me out of this,' she answered while knocking on the glass tube.

Zim cut off the speakers and turned an angry face towards Dib.

'Dib-beast!' he snapped. 'Here's your time to complain! Have you been damaged in any way?!?'

The teenager saw Kinn's frantic "NO! SAY NO!" signs from the corner of his eye.

'Not by anyone else but you, possessive jerk!' he spat.

'Then the exchange may happen,' hissed the Invader. 'Damage of any kind upon my Kribliss will NOT be tolerated,' he said to the Captain.

'Same here,' she answered.

A moment went by, where both of them exchanged a look. Red met fuchsia and an understanding passed between them. Taty nodded and typed something on the computer.

'Meet us at these coordinates, as soon as possible. Do not try to double-cross us,' she said.

'I have no interest in a pathetic enraged female,' he snapped. 'You can keep her.'

'We have no interest on keeping the human, so you will get him back,' answered the Captain.

Kinn pouted and lowered her antennas. She didn't want to surrender her new toy. Even alive, he was still interesting.

The connection was cut and Taty turned around, lost in thought. Kinn took a tentative step forwards.

'…Captain?' she muttered. 'Are you…Was this real?'

'You heard it, didn't you?' she snapped. 'It's not as if one can fake these things.'

She walked out of the room, hissing trough her teeth all the while. Kinn pulled gently on Dib's chain to get him back to her labs.

'What just happened, back there?' he asked.

'Capturing you was like a declaration of war,' answered Kinn. 'The only way of getting out of it unscathed was of accusing him of the same fault.'

'So your Captain made your pilot her Kribliss? Smart move. Why does she seem upset, then?'

'Captain Taty always seems upset,' scoffed the scientist. 'But it's serious, now. Think about it: you humans have a lifespan of what, eighty, ninety earthy years? It's nothing. We Irkens live way longer than that. Imagine a commitment that lasts two or three centuries…'

'Isn't there a way out of it?' wondered Dib.

'No, and that's why it's so rare. Once we mark someone else as a Kribliss, it gets encoded in our paks until our final deactivation. There is no way to fake it or to get rid of it. It's a final commitment.'

This left Dib thinking. The warm, fluttery feeling was back, and it disturbed him greatly. Was he really happy that Zim had taken him as what, his spouse? But Kinn didn't say it had to go both way, and she did precise it could be as enemies as well. Whatever the reasons, this Kribliss business seemed like a great deal to the aliens. Zim had chosen him as his equal and committed himself for maybe the next sixty years to protect him. If he didn't kill him first. But then, he'd made a truce with the Invader, right? They were something along the lines of friends, no? And if not exactly friends, not enemies at least.

'What are you blabbering about, human?' asked Kinn.

He realized he was muttering most of his thoughts out loud.

'I'm just wondering if Zim was aware of all this when he accepted the truce,' he said slowly. 'I mean, okay, he may have marked me earlier as an enemy, but now… we're not even that anymore. He accepted not to kill me. I wonder what it means?'

'It means you got yourself a very psychotic, very possessive, very messed-up, very kinky protector,' snickered Kinn.

The woods were dark and cold, and Dib had no idea what time it was. Maybe three or four in the morning. A star or two could be seen trough the canopy of leaves, and he thought he'd seen Venus for a moment. Kinn kept pulling at his chain, trying to keep up with her Captain's longer strides and keeping a thigh grip on both the prisoner and his clothing, which she held in her other arm. Behind them, he could hear the subtle clik-clik of spider legs. The small soldier Bass was following them, gun at the ready.

He shivered. The air was colder than he expected. On the ship, it was warm enough that walking around half naked was not that bad, but here it was torture. He would have asked for his shirt back, but he ferocious looking Captain had ordered complete silence, and Kinn seemed strangely reluctant to cover him up.

They had left the huge explorer ship behind them and activated the cloaking device so it was now invisible. Blo was left there, away from the potentially dangerous situation and ready to protect the Squeaky should anything bad happen. He may have been a diplomat, but as an Irken he was trained for combat too.

The Captain stopped upon arriving at an open space. Dib noted that some trees were burnt or uprooted, and he noticed the sprinkler lying further away. The Irkens kept far from it, hidden in the shadows.

Three figures emerged from the other side of the clearing. Zim stepped forward, head held high and fists clenched at his sides. He was followed by GIR, without his costume, and by the smaller pilot who was merrily skipping and wiggling her antennas. She waved at them, giggling.

'…Captain?' muttered Kinn, watching the pilot with suspicion. 'Are you sure he brought us the right one?'

Taty narrowed her eyes. She took a step forward and stopped some distance away from them. Dib was surprised to see that she was smaller than Zim.

'Why is she acting like this?' demanded the Captain, pointing at her giggling pilot.

'Because she's CRAZY!' answered the Invader. 'I tried to restrain her but she kept fighting like a rabid slaughtering rat person! Sedating her was the only way I could make her obey the great ZIM!'

'She broke up the tuuuuube, and the sofaaaaa, and the screeeeeeeen, and the other tuuuuuube, and the chaaaaaaaaaaair, and the –' said GIR.

'Silence GIR!' ordered Zim.

'I hope for you that she's unarmed in any way,' said Taty in a menacing tone. 'You know what would be the consequences.'

'I know our laws, pathetic female!' hissed Zim. 'You broke them by trespassing on Invader's territory!'

'They would apply if you actually were an Invader in the first place,' she spat. 'Our presence here is due to the incompetence of some data entry drones, we never intended to attack you in any way.'

'Then why are you here?!?' he snapped.

'We're an explorer crew under direct orders from the Tallest. We actually are useful to the Empire,' she said with apparent disdain.

'Oooooooh, that was below the belt,' commented GIR while picking up a daisy.

Dib gulped upon seeing Zim's face. The alien was holding inside a rage so strong, his eyes sent shivers down his spine. He had never seen him like this before. Usually, he exploded in a screaming rant and destroyed a couple of things, like Dib's spying gear, but now… He seemed to take a moment or two to swallow his anger, and extended a open hand.

'Give me back my human and get off my planet,' he said in a menacing growl.

Taty made a head sign towards Kinn. The Scientist pouted, but advanced nonetheless, pulling Dib along with her.

'Awkward, awkward, awkward, awkward…' kept muttering Dib under his breath, watching the Invader with nervousness.

At the same moment, Miik was pushed towards her crew. She glomped unceremoniously her Captain and started to rub her face against Taty's.

'Now they're making it reeeaaally difficult for me to play oblivious,' groaned the scientist watching their display with exasperation.

'What are they doing?' asked Dib, his curiosity getting the best of his nerves.

'Irken affection demonstration,' said Kinn under her breath. She pointed at her own face, right where there could have been a nose. 'We press this patch of skin against the other's while rubbing antennas. Shows a very close relationship, like the one they're trying so hard to hide at the moment…'

Dib threw them a glance, contemplating the different customs of their two planets. It reminded him of a kiss, without any kind of contact of the mouth or tongue. If all Irkens were as germaphobic as Zim, it didn't surprise him much. That thought lead him to wondering about the texture of Irken skin, there in the middle of the face. If they did it, it was because it was pleasurable in a way, right? Were all Irkens like that, or did it vary, like the humans? What were Zim's sensitive points? Was he the nuzzling kind? How would it feel to be that close and…

His train of thought was interrupted by Kinn's sharp claw on his side. He turned around and came face to face with Zim. Blood rushed to his face, wondering if the alien could hear him thinking. Oh shit, what if he was talking out loud again? THAT would be pretty awkward…

Zim went up to him, invaded his personal space and peered at his face with one narrowed eye. Dib could feel himself blushing, images of green skin, lips, teeth, claws, visions of past fights that didn't have exactly the same outcome, screams turning into moans and gasps and pleas for more, and oh shit he was staring at Zim's mouth and leaning forward, bad Dib! Bad!

'Did you shoot him with anything?' asked Zim with suspicion to the scientist. 'His skin is not the right color and he's shaking all over.'

'I haven't done anything,' said Kinn with raised antennas. 'Except… talk with him,' she added with a knowing smirk.

Fuck, thought Dib. When Zim talked he could get glimpses of his pink reptilian tongue and couldn't help wondering how it would feel against – WHAT IS THE PROBLEM WITH ME?!? He screamed inside his head. A little distressed sound came from his throat. Zim gave him a curious look. He opened his mouth to ask something but was interrupted by the Captain walking up to him. She had managed to disentangle herself from her pilot, but said pilot was merrily skipping after her, holding the hem of her uniform shirt.

'I regret this turn of events, Zim,' said the Captain, her bad mood mostly gone. 'I would have liked for things to be different.'

'Yes, yes, it would have been magical,' said Zim with a dismissive hand gesture. 'Now get off my planet!'

'…The Earth is not yours…' managed to reply Dib trough the tsunami of revelations he was currently drowning in. Nobody seemed to acknowledge him, except GIR who hugged his leg while purring.

'We can't, not while our ships are unable to fly,' scoffed Taty while lowering her antennas. 'You completely destroyed our Star Cruiser and the Squeaky lost an engine. It will take us a while to repair, and this is after our pilot gets her senses back.'

'What are you blabbering about?' said Zim. 'The almighty Zim destroyed your smaller ship to itty-bitty pieces, yes, and it was all fun and games for me! You should have seen the destruction I brought to the –'

Dib cleared his throat. The Invader seemed to realize he was rambling again and went back to the main subject.

'…but Zim never attacked your bigger ship. I have nothing to do with its malfunctioning.'

'It was safely orbiting around this planet and it got attacked from nowhere,' groaned Taty. 'I do believe you have something to do with this.'

'Vortian technology, it always breaks up when you least expect it,' shrugged Zim.

'There is a HOLE in the left engine!' snapped Taty.

'You see? If I was the one attacking your puny ship, I would have blown it to pieces! A pathetic little hole is no signature of ZIM!'

'He has a point, there,' added Dib, shaking his leg to get rid of GIR. Didn't work.

'Who else would attack an Irken ship?' asked Taty, crossing her arms.

'Don't know, don't care,' growled the Invader. 'Now hand me back my human.'

'Do I have to let him go?' whined Kinn.

'Do I get any say in this?' whined Dib.

'NO,' snapped Zim and Taty.

Zim extended a hand towards Kinn with little "Gimme!" motions. The scientist sighed and went to give him the chain.

Before his clawed hand even touched the metal, the ground exploded.

Dib flew through the air and hit his head against a tree. He fell to the floor, his head aching more than ever. He opened his eyes to see nothing but a flaming inferno around him. The forest was burning. GIR, still clinging to his leg, whistled appreciatively.

'Human! Get up!'

He felt himself being pulled to his feet by the wrists. Kinn was still holding the chain, supported by her spider legs. She pulled with insistence until they got to a safer spot, away from the flames.

'Captain?' she yelled. 'Miik?!? Where are you?'

'Silence!' snapped a voice behind them.

They turned around to find the small soldier, Bass, readying his plasma gun for the fight. His small antennas were held up high, trying to catch any sound. Suddenly:

'DOWN!' he yelled.

Kinn wasted no time, she threw herself at Dib and flattened them both to the ground. GIR was laughing hysterically at this new game. A moment later, the trees around them got cut neatly right where their heads were a second ago. Branches and leaves fell all around them. A pine tree fell onto them, stopped by Kinn's spider legs.

'Return to the ship!' ordered Bass, getting back to his feet next to them.

Kinn pushed the tree aside and started pulling the chain towards safer ground. But Dib didn't follow. He was looking frantically around, desperate to hear shouting, yelling, gloating, anything!

'Human!' insisted Kinn pulling with more strength. 'Get moving!'

'Where is Zim?' he asked with dread. 'I don't hear him!'

'MASTAH!' yelled GIR from Dib's feet. 'MAAAAAAAAAAAAAASTAH! MASTAH!'

The silence was what worried him most. Zim was always screaming something in this kind of situation. A "SILENCE, GIR!" would be enough.

'I think he got hurt by the explosion!' said Dib.

'We won't be in a better condition if we stand around!' insisted Kinn. 'Let's go back to the ship, we'll be safe!'

'I'm not going without Zim!' yelled Dib, pulling on the chain.

Kinn, surprised, let go. She swore in Irken when she saw Dib running towards the flames again, the SIR unit still clinging to him.

'Are all humans that stupid?' she complained aloud before following him.

Dib grabbed the end of the chain in his hand so it wouldn't get caught in the bushes. The more he walked, the more the heat became unbearable. He partially hid his face in his arms and kept advancing. There was nothing to be heard, except the burning wood, the falling branches, GIR humming the doom song and… a low purring, like a motor noise.

He looked around. Nothing.

A bright flash blinded him. He turned his head upwards. A spaceship!

It was somewhat bigger than Zim's Voot Runner, was a brilliant pink and proudly bore an Irken logo on its front. Its front lights were slowly sweeping, as if looking for something. Dib's stomach caught up in a knot. What if those Irken had come to kill Zim? Where was his Invader, anyways?

The ship answered him. A bright light illuminated a lying shape further away.

'MASTAH!' screamed GIR, hugging Dib's leg with so much strength that he cut his blood flood. Dib paid no mind.

He ran towards the shape, ignoring Kinn's frantic pleas to go somewhere safer, ignoring Bass shooting the ship, ignoring Taty's orders to get back, ignoring GIR's insane yelling. Zim was there, barely conscious, eyes half closed, trying to sit up. His Invader uniform was torn and burnt, pink blood covered his face, his antennas were bent at an unnatural angle, his left leg had a huge gash that kept bleeding and bleeding…

'ZIM!' yelled Dib, getting closer. 'Are you all right?'

'…Dib…' muttered the alien with all his strength. 'Get the hell out of here!' he coughed.

'Not without you, you idiot!'

He ran the last steps, got next to Zim, and never saw the electric bolt aiming towards them. Suddenly, he was surrounded by blue sparks, felt himself be pulled, and the last thing he saw before disappearing were Zim's horrified eyes upon him.

AN: But I never said there would be no cliffhangers here ;P I'm so evil.

Oooooooh I hate action scenes so much, you have no idea how long I procrastinated this when I was writing it. But I kinda like this chapter, the plot is moving forward :)