A/N: So this was pretty emotional for me to write. I cried, negl. It was going to be longer, but it's already six and I have to post today. But yo smut isn't that fun? God, I hate this story….

Title: Flow Sweetly, Hang Heavy

Chapter Title: My Heart to You

Rating: Overall; M This Chapter; M for descriptions of abuse and pornz.

Warning: If you're easily triggered by abuse and related topics I suggest running away.

Words: 2,323

My Heart To You

The next day, Castiel didn't call Dean.

He almost did, after spending nearly the whole day considering it, most of that day being spent on his bedroom floor, staring at his phone. His main concern was seeming too desperate. He didn't want Dean to think that he wasn't interested, because he was, but he also worried that he may come off as too needy.

"Dating is hard." Castiel had complained after an hour of thinking. It was his anxiety that became the final decider. Phone calls just weren't Castiel's forte.

So the day after their date, Castiel did not call Dean. But he promised himself he would, when the time is right, that is.

As it would so happen, the so-called 'right time' happened the very next day.

Cas was busy at his canvas at time, although he wasn't very much thinking about his art. His mind was elsewhere, on Dean, of course. Fed up, he dropped his brush in the tub of water with a 'clunk', and ran into the kitchen. Absent-mindedly, he grabbed his phone and the pad where Dean's number was written. He dialed the number without thought and listened for the ring. It wasn't until he heard the familiar "Hello?" from the other line that he became fully conscious of what he was doing. He straightened out his back and cleared his throat.

"Hello, Dean."

"Hey there, Cas! What's up?" Dean's voice was cheery, and it made Castiel smile.

"Um, nothing. Nothing." Castiel responded hesitantly. "I just thought I should call."

For a moment, there was a silence from the other line that worried Castiel.

Sure enough Dean replied with, "I'd like to see you again, if that's alright with you."

Castiel bit his lip, almost as if he was trying to bite back a laugh, and responded "Well of course. When and where?"

Castiel had to have a celebratory shimmy in response to Dean's request.

"How about tonight?" Dean asked. "You can come over, I'll make you dinner. You could come at about eight?"

"Alright then." Castiel responded, smiling, even though he knew that Dean could not see it.
They chatted a bit longer about this and that, before saying their goodbyes. Castiel could hardly wait for that evening.

7:57 pm, Castiel was sitting at Dean's door step, adjusting his tie. He wore his usual leaving-the-house-but-not-going-to-Target outfit, which consisted of a white dress shirt, a blue tie that matched his eyes, and black dress pants, which seemed to be getting a bit snug. He decided to check his watch one more time, just to make sure that he was being timely. Cas took a deep breath and knocked on the door three times, hoping that he was loud enough for Dean to hear. He waited a few moments, until Dean opened the door, beaming. He was in faded jeans and a fairly new looking black t-shirt. Cas couldn't help but notice that it hugged his figure in all the right ways.

"Hey gorgeous." said Dean as Cas entered his home.

Castiel turned to him and they kissed, shortly but passionately.

"I made chicken parmesan." Dean murmured, his lips still very nearly pressed to Cas'.

Cas smiled, and hummed in response. He held Dean's hand as he was led through the familiar kitchen where he and Dean shared their first kiss, and in to a room he didn't recognize, which he assumed to be Dean's dining room. It was openly connected to a den, and continued with the house's light-toned-but-still-country-homey theme. The rounded table that sat in the center of the dining room was set for two, each plate with identical meals and a flickering candle as the centerpiece.

Dean smirked, and ran to pull out a chair for Cas, whose grin spread across his face as he took the seat. He looked at his meal, and was pleased. Chicken backed in bread crumbs with sauce and cheese on top, over pasta. Or, as it was better and more widely known, chicken Parmesan. He cut daintily into the chicken, stopping to look up at Dean, who was watching him expectantly. Cas grinned and took a bite, letting the flavors seep around through his mouth. He nodded happily, causing Dean to break out in a beaming expression.

They ate, for awhile, in a comfortable silence. They didn't talk, but they also didn't need to talk, they were content with each other's presence. It was funny how they moved, really. Occasionally stealing glances at each other, sometimes mirroring the other's actions, their bodies seeming to be in a casual synchronization. If someone was watching, they would probably assume by the way that they were acting that they were a couple that had been together for quite some time, instead of two men on their second date.

Eventually, Dean broke the silence. "So Cas, tell me about yourself. I want to know more about you."

Castiel was surprised by the request, but pleased to know that he felt that way. "What you would like to know?" he inquired in response.

Dean shrugged. "I don't know. Something. What was first date like?"

Castiel chuckled at the question. He bit at his lip for a moment, and answered slyly, "I think you should know, considering that you were there."

Dean nearly choked on his food. "You mean two nights ago?!" he exclaimed. "That was your first ever?"

Castiel simply nodded, appearing to be terribly uninterested in the conversation.

"If you don't mind me asking, why?" Dean nearly whispered, leaning forward in his chair.

Castiel gulped audibly. His muscles tightened and his legs began to shake. "It's- um- a bit of a touchy story. Kind of a long one, too."

Dean sat his drink on the table, and tool one of Castiel's hands in his. "You don't have to tell me anything you don't want to," he said. "I don't want to make you uncomfortable."

Cas shook his head, and replied, "No, actually, I'd like to talk about it." he looked around the room nervously. "Is there anywhere else that we can sit?" Cas asked.

Dean nodded, and without letting go of Cas' hand, took him to the sofa in his den, where they sat with Dean's arm wrapped around Castiel's waist.

For what could have been no more than five minutes, but yet seemed like an hour, they sat on the sofa, Castiel's head nuzzled in to Dean's shoulder. Finally, Castiel spoke.

"I was eighteen," he said, looking up at Dean, almost losing himself again in the greenness. "a senior in high school. There was a guy who was a couple grades below me. We had been talking for awhile, and he eventually worked up the nerve to ask me on a date. I, of course, accepted. My mom died when I was seven, and my dad wasn't around much, so I was practically raised by my older siblings. The only one I told about my date was my sister, Anna, because I thought that I could tell her not to tell the rest. I was wrong. While I was getting ready, my two oldest siblings, Michael and Lucifer came in to my room, asking all kinds of questions. I lied, but of course they already knew the truth. The beat me. They took turns holding me down and wouldn't stop until I was unconscious and bleeding, the whole time calling me a faggot and a queer. All of my other siblings just watched, except Gabriel, who wasn't home that night. I ended up being in a coma for three days. When I came back from the hospital, that wasn't the end of it. It was actually just the beginning. The beatings and harassment became regular and eventually I couldn't take it anymore. Right after I graduated high school Gabriel and I left for the city. That's how I got here."

Sometime during his story, Cas had adverted his eyes from Dean's in near shame. After he finished, he looked back up to Dean, only to see a single tear running down the side of his face. Cas instinctively reached his hand to Dean's face, and wiped away the stream with his thumb. "I'm so sorry." Dean whispered, whilst choking back tears.

"Don't be sorry. Things happen." Castiel responded.

Dean pulled a hand to the side of Castiel's face, and lowered his face, putting only centimeters between them.

"Listen to me," Dean ordered. "Things like that shouldn't happen to a beautiful, wonderful person like you. As long as I have you, and as long as I live, I won't let anyone hurt you, ever again. I swear."

Castiel had no words. Not for how appreciative he was of Dean, not for how happy he felt, not for sorry he was that he had made Dean cry, not for how much he trusted Dean in that moment, and in whole, not even for how much he cared for Dean. So instead of speaking, he pressed their lips together, letting his touch speak all the words that he couldn't.

Dean absorbed every movement and emotion he could from Cas, and he respected all of it. He knew then that he would have to protect Cas, but above that, he would have to make him happy, and help him forget all the pain that had been caused to him by the people he used to trust. He would show him a new kind of trust and a new kind of love. So when Castiel slid his tongue against Dean's bottom lip, he opened his mouth readily and allowed Castiel entry. Their tongues slid together with ease, as Dean gripped Cas' hip lightly. Castiel grabbed the back of Dean's neck and pulled him downward so that Dean was over top him, never breaking their sweet kiss.

Suddenly, Cas tore away from Dean, letting his head plop down on the pillow. His mouth hung open slightly, with lips that were red and swollen from kissing. Blue eyes searched frantically across Dean, before his gaze interlocked with a caring pair of green eyes. "Dean," Castiel gulped. "I want you."

Dean nodded and smiled sweetly, once again joining his lips with those of Castiel. He wrapped both of Cas' legs around his waist, and his arms around his neck. He wrapped one arm around the small of Castiel's back, while the other rested just below Cas, as to hold him up. He carried Castiel up the stairs this way, pausing only to kiss Castiel chastely, whom was nibbling at his ear and neck when he was not doing so. Castiel was light in Dean's strong arms, so Dean could easily whisk him up the stairs and into his bedroom, where they fell on to Dean's bed.

Dean kissed at Castiel's neck, drawing out soft little moans. Against the soft skin of Castiel's neck Dean whispered, "Cas baby, I'm gonna make you feel so good. You gotta tell me what you want. What do you want me to do, baby?"

"Kiss me." Castiel whispered.

Dean did as he was told, kissing Cas deeply. He kissed down Cas, neck as he slid his hands underneath the white button-down. He began undo each button slowly, because he wanted to take time with this process. He wanted it to last. When the final button was undone Dean slid the shirt off of Cas' thin shoulders. His eyes flickered over the expanse of Castiel's body. It had a fairly pale complexion without being too much so. Cas was actually fairly toned and his body was sleek.

Occasionally on his body, the clear skin would be interrupted by a scar or other mark that Dean was almost certain must have been a product of abuse. He took time to kiss every scar, and tonguing at certain spots in-between them. He flicked his tongue across either of Cas' nipples, stopping to suck on and scrape his teeth against the right one, earning a moan and a shiver from the man lying below him. His hands slid to Castiel's hips where the pad of his thumb ran circles on the place where his hipbones jutted out.

Dean placed his mouth just above Castiel's waistline, sucking harshly, determined to leave a mark. After he was satisfied with his work, and impressed by the red mark, he placed one hand where Cas' zipper was. He looked back up at Castiel, searching for his gaze. "Is this okay?" he asked, running his finger across the button. Cas' hips arched into Dean's hand as he moaned a needy "Yes…"

Dean complied, undoing the fastened pants slowly, pulling them off of the thinner man's legs. Dean pushed the seam of Castiel's boxers up towards his hip, and licked his inner thigh, adoring every moan that poured from the mouth above him. Cas, fed up with waiting, pushed his boxers down his hips eagerly, hissing at the cool air hitting his throbbing manhood. Dean continued kissing at Castiel's thighs, until the moans became too much for him to ignore.

"What do you want, baby? Just tell me." Dean murmured.

"Touch me." Cas gasped.

Dean kissed the base of Castiel's erection, feeling it pulse underneath his mouth. Pulling his head back, he could see thick droplets of pre-cum on Castiel's soft tip. Curiously, he tongued at it slowly. Castiel shivered, and Dean loved it. Eager for more, he swallowed Cas as much as he could. Dean let his tongue run up Castiel's shaft as he bobbed his head up and down against the length. Castiel was big enough that it took quite some difficulty for Dean to take in all of him, but he managed. When the head hit the back of his throat, he hummed, causing Cas to writhe beneath him.

It wasn't long until Castiel came, shooting heat down Dean's throat, while Dean milked him dry and swallowed down all of it.

"You're perfect, baby." Dean murmured as he joined their lips together once again.