It took a bit longer for me to update. I'm writing a lot of stories, at the moment, that's why. Enjoy reading.
Edit: I re-read this chapter and I noticed some mistakes. You don't have to read it, again, the changes are simple. Just some longer/shorter paragraphs.
Chapter 6
Squidward woke up that morning to the sound of SpongeBob's alarm clock. His house shook as his eyes whipped open and he stared at the shaking ceiling in alarm. He wondered if he'd have a heart-attack one morning after being shocked out of his sleep by SpongeBob's horn-clock.
Once it finally stopped sounding, Squidward heard SpongeBob's annoying voice.
"Oh, yay! It's morning time, Gary! I better get ready for the day!" SpongeBob exclaimed. Squidward sighed and sat up in his bed. Just as he sat up, his own alarm clock went off. He shut it off and then got out of bed.
Why do I even have an alarm clock when SpongeBob's wakes me up every morning? Squidward thought, rubbing his tired eyes. He didn't feel the need to stretch, he felt just like he had before he went to sleep. He didn't get a good sleep at all. He kept twisting and turning, coming in and out of sleep. When he shut his eyes, two minutes later they'd open and his mind would be full of SpongeBob, SpongeBob, SpongeBob. It was driving him nuts. Sleep was something his mind (and body) desperately needed.
Squidward sighed as he slowly walked into his bathroom. He removed his pajama hat and shirt, then turned the shower on. He waited until it was warm and then stepped into the tub.
I wonder how the picnic went. That stupid air-breather was probably all over SpongeBob, trying to get him to fall for her. I knew she was insane but I didn't think she was also stupid! Isn't she supposed to be a scientist or something?! She should know that SpongeBob's not going to like her just because she wants him to.
Squidward poured some soap into his hands and then massaged his aching head.
SpongeBob likes me, not her. And she knows that... she thinks she can win him.
I shouldn't care! Why do I care so much? I don't! In fact, I'll easily be able to keep my mind off this topic for the rest of the day, no problem! I mean... why think about stupid old SPONGEBOB when I can think about ME?!
Squidward began humming, trying to lighten himself up as he thought about how good he was at playing the clarinet and how beautiful every peice of art he made was. He smiled and put his head under the water, washing off the bubbles.
Squidward rubbed his eyes and then opened them. He turned around to grab the soap bar and instead of seeing what he was expecting, he found big bright blue eyes in his face. He screamed on the top of his lungs and jumped a mile, clutching at his chest with all his might.
"SPONGEBOB!!" Squidward yelled, grabbing a pile of bubbles and putting them between his legs to hide his nakedness.
What is he doing in my bath tub? Dear Neptune, he does this because he's got feelings for me?! What's going through that sick head of his?! Squidward thought, his chest moving rapidly as he tried to catch his breath.
"Oh, sorry to frighten ya, buddy! I just wanted to see you before heading off to Sandy's," SpongeBob said, turning around and grabbing the bar of soap.
"I think you wanted this," SpongeBob said, handing the bar to Squidward who's pupils were so small they were almost invisible. Squidward swallowed and took the bar of soap into his hand, quickly.
"SpongeBob...?" Squidward asked slowly as he looked down on the sponge with a nervous smile. Usually he'd get mad and kick SpongeBob out of his bath tub, but knowing that he has feelings for him and came into his bath tub was a whole different story. He'd always wondered why SpongeBob would end up in the shower with him and usually he just told himself it was because he was annoying. Knowing SpongeBob had feelings for him and that was the reason he'd come into the shower with him was quite frightening.
"Yuh-huh?" SpongeBob asked, mistaking the nervous smile for an innocent, happy one.
"Well, um... why are you in my tub?" Squidward asked, his eyes wide. SpongeBob fiddled with his tie.
"Um... well, it's my day off so I won't be able to see you in a couple of hours. I just wanted to say hello before you go to work," SpongeBob explained.
"What do you MEAN 'a couple of hours'? Don't tell me you're planning on coming to the Krusty Krab on your day off!" Squidward said, terrified, as his bit on the end of his hands. He really didn't want to have to deal with SpongeBob, today. His mind was so tired of the topic.
"It's true, Squiddy!" SpongeBob said, thinking Squidward meant 'don't tell me' in a good way. He put his arm around Squidward, who screamed.
"Me and Sandy are gonna stop by to have some krabby patties in a couple of hours! You see, she told me she wanted to go out to eat and I told her we should go to the Krusty Krab so I could see you on my day off!" SpongeBob said, smiling wide. Squidward pushed SpongeBob so he was on the other side of the tub.
Sandy's such an idiot! Squidward thought, grinding his teeth. He shut his eyes tightly and held onto his head.
"SpongeBob, she's only asking you to go out to eat with her because she thinks that if she spends a lot of time with you, you'll fall in love with her! You truely are dense if you didn't know that!" Squidward yelled.
Why did I just admit to knowing that? Squidward thought, confusion softening his expression. He didn't want to know why he'd told SpongeBob that information and he wished that he could take back what he'd said right away.
"Oh, Squidward, you silly clam! Sandy knows that I don't like her, she was perfectly okay with it! She's accepted it! I don't think she's trying to get me to fall in love with her," SpongeBob said, laughing at Squidward's strange thoughts. Squidward has quite the imagination!
"Y-yeah... you're right. I don't know what I was thinking. Heeh, heeh..." Squidward fake-laughed while he stroked his arm. SpongeBob stood still and stared at Squidward, smiling. A few moments later, SpongeBob jumped up randomly (scaring Squidward with his sudden movement) and said his good-byes.
"Well, see you later, Squidward! I've gotta get to Sandy's house!" SpongeBob left the bath tub and started climbing out of the bath room window. Squidward watched as SpongeBob turned around and wiggled his fingers at him before dropping down to the ground below.
What just happened? Why did I tell SpongeBob of Sandy's intentions? Is it because... dare I say it... I really am jealous? Did I tell SpongeBob what Sandy's planning because I want them to stop spending time together? Do I subconciously have the same feelings for SpongeBob that SpongeBob has for me?
No! Of course I don't! Urrg! I wish I wasn't thinking like this! I'm thinking like a mad man! A MAD MAN!! I need to have a good night's sleep soon or else I'm going to go permanently insane! SpongeBob, you dolt, this is all your fault!
Squidward was shaking while he shut the water off. He ran his hand down his face and stepped out of the tub, grabbing a towel off the rack. He dried himself off and looked in the mirror.
"Oh, I look horrible! I need my beauty rest and I'm not going to get any of that with SPONGEBOB on my mind, 24/7!" Squidward sighed and fell to the floor.
" I hope all this passes soon. I can't take it anymore!" Squidward yelled, twitching.
--
Squidward made it to the Krusty Krab one minute late.
"Squidward, you're one minute late! What is the meaning of this?!" Mr. Krabs yelled the second he walked through the door. Squidward glared at his boss.
"It's only one measly minute, Mr. Krabs! Nobody's even here, yet!" Squidward yelled as he walked over to the boat.
"One measly minute?! Squidward, it only takes a minute to come through the doors and order a krabby patty! What if someone was going to come in and then saw that the chasier wasn't here yet and then left?! We would've lost money! And losing money is worse than losing a child!" Mr. Krabs yelled.
"Nobody even thought about coming here, yet, except SpongeBob! It's only been open for one minute! It'll at least take fifteen minutes for anyone to get here! It always does!" Squidward said, crossing his arms over his chest. Mr. Krabs squinted at Squidward.
"I don't like your tone! Drop it or you're fired! And where's that paper bag I gave you?! Put it on, you look even worse today than you did yesterday!" Mr. Krabs yelled, his hands on his hips. Squidward's left eye twitched.
"I don't know where the bag is," Squidward said, monotonously.
"Well, it cost me a lot of money! Give me five dollars and I might just give you a new paper bag to put over your head instead of firing you," Mr. Krabs said, holding his claw out. Squidward reached into his pocket and gave Mr. Krabs the money. Mr. Krabs smelled it, stared at it, licked it, tugged on it. It was real.
Mr. Krabs gave Squidward another paper bag and Squidward put it over his head, wishing he hadn't left the one SpongeBob gave him at home. Although, he wasn't surprised that he forgot it. His thinking was quite deranged this morning.
Squidward sighed and sat down on the bench.
"No sitting!" Mr. Krabs yelled before going into his office. Squidward quickly stood back up.
--
Squidward didn't know what time it was. He was hungry, tired, sore, confused, and irritated. There had been seven customers so far, all asking for krabby patties which Squidward had to make with a bag over his head. He wished very much that today wasn't SpongeBob's day off just because doing that without sight was quite hard.
He ruined most of the krabby patties because he couldn't see if they were done cooking or not. Some were burned, some were undercooked. Mr. Krabs noticed the complaints and came out of his office, running into the kitchen to yell at Squidward.
"What do you call this?!" Mr. Krabs yelled, holding up a deformed krabby patty.
"I don't know what to call it because I can't SEE IT!!" Squidward yelled, clenching his fists.
"Oh, look at me! I'm poor, poor Squidward! I can't see because mean old Mr. Krabs put a bag over me head! Boo hoo hoo!" Mr. Krabs mocked.
Squidward began to sweat out his anger.
"Just put some holes in the bag!" Mr. Krabs yelled.
"Oh, you mean you won't yell at me for that?! Are you sure the sound of the bag ripping won't scare off the customers?!" Squidward yelled, putthing his hands on his hips. Mr. Krabs squinted at his employee.
"Quit your back-talkin' and do as I say, Mr. Squidward!" Mr. Krabs yelled before leaving the kitchen.
Why must he be so difficult?! Mr. Krabs thought before going back into his office.
Squidward ripped two holes in the bag where his eyes would be. They were uneven and he couldn't see perfectly well like he could with SpongeBob's bag, but it did help some. He went out of the kitchen and stood back at the cash register to read another magazine as he waited for more orders.
This is the worst day of my life! Squidward thought, his eyes moving over the words in the magazine. He wasn't really reading it, he was thinking too much to be able to read.
"Dahahahaha! That really is funny, Sandy! One time, my uncle slipped on sea weed and he slammed his head on a rock! Ever since, every day at the same time he fell on that rock, he screams 'NO! THE ROCK! THE ROCK!!"
Squidward gasped and peeked over the top of his magazine once he'd heard SpongeBob. He found the sponge dressed up in yesterday's picnic outfit while Sandy again had her face all done up. She was smiling down at SpongeBob while SpongeBob was smiling up at her and going on and on and on about his uncle.
Squidward squinted as the two came up to the cash register. SpongeBob stopped talking right away once he'd seen Squidward.
"Squidward!! How's work? Are you doing okay? Are you feeling well? Hey, it looks kinda... empty in here..." SpongeBob said, his hand to his chin. Squidward hmphed.
"I'm doing just fine, thank you very much! Just tell me what you'd--" Squidward began.
"Another bag, huh? Why don't you just put the one I gave you on?" SpongeBob asked.
"I forgot it at home. Now just tell me what you--" Squidward was cut off, again.
"You left it at home?! Well, I can go get it for you! I'm sure Sandy won't mind!"
Sandy's mouth hung open in shock and anger.
SpongeBob?! I'm right here, you nitwit! Don't act as if I don't even exist!! she thought, clenching her fists. Squidward couldn't help but laugh.
Huh, huh! She tries getting me jealous? Well, now it's payback time! Squidward thought.
"Well, I'll be right back, you two! Make small talk!" SpongeBob said before running out of the Krusty Krab.
Squidward looked at Sandy through the bag and then sniffed. Sandy squinted and crossed her arms over her chest.
"You call that a pretty face?" asked Squidward, referring to Sandy's done-up face.
"You call that a face at all?" Sandy asked, referring to Squidward's.
They continued giving eachother bad looks until SpongeBob returned with the colorful bag.
"I got it, Squidward! I found it on the table!" SpongeBob said as he ran up to Squidward. He held the bag out for Squidward. Squidward took the brown bag off and replaced it with the colorful one.
"Okay, will you tell me what'd you like to order, now?" Squidward asked, holding a pen and pad out in front of him.
"A krabby patty! No! Two krabby patties! And a coke, please!" SpongeBob ordered, smiling. Squidward wrote down his order and then waited for Sandy's.
"And what would YOU like?" Squidward asked, glaring at Sandy. Sandy growled.
"Oh, let's see... wait... YOU'RE not going to be cooking, are you?" Sandy asked. Squidward gasped.
"Yes, I am! And you should feel honored!" Squidward said. Sandy stuck her tongue out, pretending to be disgusted.
"Eeww... I don't want anythin' YOU'RE cookin'! I'd prolly die the second it hit my stomach!"
"What?! Are you mad?! I'm a fine cook! Look at all those happy customers!" Squidward yelled, pointing at the customers. They were screaming in pain, one of them saying 'my leg!'. Sandy smirked and Squidward growled.
"Why, you--!" Squidward began, hands in front of himself as if he were going to push her over. Sandy went into karate-mode, holding her hands out in front of her as if she were about to chop Squidward's head off.
" Guys, guys! Calm down, there's no need to fight!" SpongeBob yelled, standing between the two of them with his hands out. He didn't like when his friends fought.
"Sandy, Squidward is a good cook! Squidward, Sandy has a sensitive stomach so please try your hardest when making her krabby patty!" SpongeBob said, looking at his friends. Both cooled down slowly.
"All better?" SpongeBob asked, lips puckered as if he were talking to two young children. Sandy and Squidward said nothing, only crossed their arms over their chests and turned the other way, hmphing.
"Okay... Squidward, Sandy would like a krabby patty and... a diet... coke? Am I right?" SpongeBob asked his female friend. Sandy smiled and shook her head up and down.
"That's right, SpongeBob! You, uh... you sure know me well! It's almost as if we've been together forever!" Sandy said, her intent: to irritate Squidward. It worked.
"Yeah, forever, pfft..." Squidward rolled his eyes and then went into the kitchen to make the patties and get the drinks for his customers.
Stupid Sandy... What's she giving me attitude for? She needs to get a grip!
Squidward frowned as he slapped three patties onto the grill. He decided that SpongeBob's patties were the ones on the left and Sandy's patty was the one on the right. As they cooked, Squidward peeked through the little window and watched Sandy and SpongeBob talk to one another. He couldn't hear anything but he saw Sandy and SpongeBob laughing merrily. Squidward grunted and stopped watching the two. They were really getting on his nerves, Sandy especially.
I can just imagine what they're talking about... Sandy's probably goin' on about how great she thinks he is. She's putting her moves on him, trying to steal him from me! Waaah! Steal him from me?! Where'd that come from?! Neptune, I'm sick in the head!
Squidward shook his head back and forth. He pulled on the collar of his shirt and put his mind on other things. He wondered why he hadn't been painting lately and so he decided once he got home, he'd make the greatest picture in all of history. He wondered what it'd look like.
Okay... it'll have me in it. And... I'll be holding the sun in my hands. That'll stand for how god-like I am. How beautiful and powerful I am. Then... bowing at my feet will be SpongeBob and Sandy and all the rest of Bikini Bottom! That'll stand for how weak and pathetic everyone else is!
Oh, hooo! It's gonna be so beautiful...
Squidward smiled, smugly, and he flipped the patties. He ignored the little voice in the back of his mind that kept begging him to see what Sandy and SpongeBob were doing. The voice got louder and louder and Squidward became more and more jittery. He grinded his teeth together, nervously, and then peeked through the little window. He couldn't help himself, he was clearly becoming obsessed. He was clearly going INSANE.
He saw that Sandy had her arm around SpongeBob's shoulders and SpongeBob was smiling brightly, looking at the squirrel. Squidward wondered if Sandy would succeed in getting SpongeBob to fall in love with her. He seemed to really like spending time with her. As much as Squidward hated to admit it, he knew he wanted to be the object of SpongeBob's affections.
Listen to me... I'm going crazy. I'm jealous of Sandy because SpongeBob likes spending time with her? It's absurd! Maybe I really DO like SpongeBob. No! I can't! That'd be the death of me! I don't like him... I can prove it!
But how do I do that? I could spend the day with him... Or maybe I could invite him over for a movie... Yeah, that's what I'll do! By tomorrow morning, I'll have proof that I don't like SpongeBob! But... what if I do? What'll I do, then? Repress it?
... Sounds good to me...
Squidward sighed, flipping the patties again and as he flipped Sandy's, he got an idea. He bit his lip, looked to the left and the right, and then smirked.
Sandy... that loser. She thinks she can treat me this way without payback? Ha!! She doesn't deserve to have a taste of my fabulous cooking! Hahaha!!
Squidward lifted the bag over his mouth and pretended he had to sneeze, holding his nose.
"Ah-chooo!!"
Squidward made sure he got spit all over Sandy's patty as he fake sneezed. He laughed a few times, putting his hand to his mouth. Even if Mr. Krabs had cameras in that room, he wouldn't have suspected anything. Squidward wrung his hands together, maliciously. He was such an evil, evil man.
A few minutes later, Squidward came out of the kitchen holding two trays with krabby patties on each of them. He set the first tray down in front of SpongeBob and the second one in front of Sandy, who glared at him. Squidward smirked.
"Thanks Squidward! I bet it's gonna taste great! Right, Sandy?" SpongeBob nudged Sandy a few times and winked. Sandy rolled her eyes.
"Yeah, I bet," she said, sarcastically. Luckily, SpongeBob often didn't catch sarcasm and he smiled happily before gnawing on a krabby patty.
Squidward bit his lip and walked over to the cash register. He watched Sandy as if she were his prey. She took her helmet off, stuffed the krabby patty in her mouth, and then put the helmet back on. It was filled with water, so she flushed it all out. As she was chewing, she thought the krabby patty tasted unusually moist and gooey and then she decided it must have been because it was in the water before she ate it.
Or maybe it's just because it was made by the slimiest creature in the sea! She thought.
Squidward's pupils were dilated and his face was pale. The evil he had done was so freeing, it made him feel so alive! He squeezed the end of his shirt and pulled on it, letting out some energy.
Take THAT you air-breather! TAKE THAT!! Squidward thought, laughing maniacally.
--
Once SpongeBob and Sandy were finished eating, they stood up from the chairs, leaving their trays on the table with dirty napkins upon them. SpongeBob patted his stomach, eyes half-lidded as he licked his lips.
"Mm, mmm! Squidward's such a good cook!" SpongeBob said, looking ahead of himself without seeing.
"It wasn't that great..." Sandy said, rolling her eyes. SpongeBob shrugged and then turned towards Squidward who was peeking over his magazine, watching the two converse.
"Thanks for the krabby patties, Squidward! See you later!" SpongeBob yelped, waving. Squidward grinded his teeth together, looking to the left, and then stood up from the seat in the boat.
"Wait! SpongeBob!" Squidward yelled, sounding desperate. Sandy raised a brow as SpongeBob smiled and ran over to a nervous looking Squidward. Squidward fiddled with his hands.
"Yeah, Squiddy?" asked SpongeBob, his eyes curious. Squidward cleared his throat and sniffed, rubbed his forehead and shut his eyes. He licked his lips, opened his eyes, and then looked down at SpongeBob's shoes.
"Um... well... I was just wondering if you'd... um... well... come over my house?" Squidward heard SpongeBob gasp, holding the sides of his head. Squidward began to panic.
"I know that might sound strange coming from me but I just!... it's, um... my calendar! On my calendar it says that I have to watch a movie with my neighbor! For, uh... good luck. And... well... I know Patrick is busy and all, so I guess it's going to have to be you, huh!" Squidward blinked rapidly, raising his eyes to look into SpongeBob's. SpongeBob's pupils were so large, they'd almost filled up the entire blue.
"Squi... Squidwar... Squidward... You want me to come over your house...?" SpongeBob asked, immobile. Squidward began laughing maniacally, he couldn't stop himself. Tears streamed down his face and his eyes were shut tight. He laughed so hard, he could feel his ribs squashing his innards. Trying to breathe, Squidward held his chest and shut his eyes. Once he'd opened them, he found SpongeBob looking at him, confused.
"You... okay, Squid?" SpongeBob asked, a brow raised.
"Y-yeah... I just think it was funny that you thought I wanted you to come over my house! Hahahaha! My, my, SpongeBob, you never learn, do you?! I don't want you to come over, I'm just doing it for the good luck! Don't you see? I'm just being selfish! I don't want you to come over... pfft! Why would I want you to come over my house?!" Squidward again began laughing, holding his head in his hands. SpongeBob bit his bottom lip, then scratched the top of his head.
"Oh... well... okay. Whether you want me to come over or not, I still bet it's going to be great! What are we gonna do, buddy?" SpongeBob asked, putting his arm around Squidward's shoulders. Squidward swallowed, his breath catching in his throat.
"Heh, heh, heh... I was thinking we could, um... watch a movie..." Squidward said, his voice quiet. SpongeBob smiled.
"A movie?! Sounds great! Which one is it gonna be?! Oh, no, don't tell me! I want it to be a surprise!!" SpongeBob yelped, his eyes sparkling.
"... I, uh, haven't actually picked a movie. How about you take care of that? I'll..." Squidward paused, thinking.
"You can get the popcorn and hot cocoa!"
"Y-yeah... okay... I think I can manage..." Squidward said, slowly getting used to the way SpongeBob clung to him.
"Good! I can't wait! When will I be coming over? Seven, eight, nine?" SpongeBob paused and leaned closer to Squidward.
"Ten...?" he asked, quietly, as if worrying others might hear him. Squidward twitched, his mind flipping through all the reasons as to why coming over his house at ten o'clock would be a bad thing for others to know about. His mind didn't go to a good place so he quickly pushed SpongeBob off him and made sure he forgot what had just entered his mind.
"No! Not ten! How about... yeah, seven! Seven's good!" Squidward yelped. SpongeBob smiled, waving to Squidward.
"Okay! Seven it is, then! See you later, Squidward!" SpongeBob cried before running back over to an irritated Sandy. Squidward began to wave then quickly stopped himself. He shook his head back and forth.
Now I'm waving to him? I'm mentally deranged...
--
Sandy and SpongeBob walked out of the Krusty Krab. SpongeBob was smiling brightly, going over in his head everything that might happen at Squidward's house. He sighed, dreamily.
Oh, this is going to be so great! Me and Squidward ALONE, in his HOUSE, AT NIGHT, watching a MOVIE, while eating POPCORN, and drinking HOT COCOA! We would sit on the couch together, watching whatever movie I pick, and then Squidward would tell me how great it is to be with me! Then I'd tell him that I love spending time with him, as well, and then we'd hug for the rest of the night!
SpongeBob began fiddling with his thumbs, a huge smile on his face as he thought about the great night ahead of him.
"What were you and Squidward talking about?" SpongeBob suddenly heard, which snapped him out of his reverie. Eyes wide, SpongeBob turned to Sandy and noticed she was glaring at him. Clearing his throat, SpongeBob flattened out his tie and shut his eyes.
"Well, Sandy, if you must know... Squidward asked me if I'd watch a movie with him..." SpongeBob said, arms crossed over his chest. Sandy clicked her tongue.
"What?! Why'd he ask you to watch a movie with him?! He doesn't even like you!" Sandy said, angrily. SpongeBob eyes widened.
"He does so like me! He just... has a hard time opening up to people..." SpongeBob said. Sandy felt a tad bit guilty. She imagined that it must have been hard for SpongeBob to have a crush on someone that didn't like them... she was going through the same issue. Clearing her throat, she put her hand on SpongeBob's back.
"Uh... look, I apologise for saying that, SpongeBob. I guess you're right..." Sandy said, upset. SpongeBob's irritated expression slowly turned into a smile.
"It's alright. I forgive you. Not everybody understands Squidward the way I do!" SpongeBob said, hand to his chest. Sandy sighed and looked in the other direction.
He still has feelings for Squidward... I'm not trying hard enough! I've got to try harder... maybe a kiss on the cheek here and there, an invitation to the treedome... I hope all my trying is going to be worth it...
Sandy looked down at SpongeBob and then held his hand. He gasped and flinched, looking at their hands. He then smiled and held back, glad that he had a friend as good as she was.
Any thoughts? Good or bad, please review.