"We'll be approaching Grissom Academy in an hour, Commander."

"Thanks, Joker," Shepard turned over in her bed and brought her feet to the ground, feeling woozy as the weight of her muscular legs sunk to the floor. She took a moment before getting to her feet and starting to get dressed, slipping on her under-armor and leg armor. A single glance told her that Garrus had already gotten up and left. The vacancy of the room seemed awkward, Garrus usually never got up silently enough for Shepard to sleep through it. She buckled her chest plate on and ran her fingers through the tangles in her hair, last night must have been a good one.

She rolled her wrists and pulled on her arm and shoulder plates, stretching her arms and rotating her back to make sure everything was fitting right and nothing snagged. Again, she felt it strange that she didn't have Garrus in there to help go through her routine. She knocked her head to one side, and then the other, then dropped to the floor and did a full rep of push-ups to get her muscles awake and her heart going a little.

She sighed and headed for the door. In the cockpit, she caught up with EDI and Joker, who explained to her what the mission was; there was a school of biotics who were in danger from an attack by Cerberus and their job was to stop them. Shepard's mind wandered as the short briefing and planning came to a close, and she spent a moment to watch the people around her as they carried on their way, she started to wonder how they could work in such a dark light, it was hard to see their faces.

Traynor was deeply entranced in her work, probably on the verge of discovering something of value, the workers on the side worked independently and silently. Shepard felt a contented glow of pride as she looked upon her comrades and crew members, each of which had their own unique story and bestowed a personal value onto everything they did. Each worker psychologically unique from one another. Their individuality made the purpose of this ship more than a side-kick in the fight against the Reapers, it made it a promise. Each and every person had their own personal goals, values, beliefs, and motives; each of them responsible for their own history and their own future. It was by their hand, their beliefs, their obligations and moral determination that landed them here, working individually for the better purpose of the whole. And nothing anyone did could control their destiny. Without them, the Normandy wouldn't function as seamlessly as it did. She silently thanked each of them for their efforts and for their own individuality.

"Are you ready, Commander?" EDI cut into her thoughts, from where she sat at Joker's side. Shepard murmured a response and headed for the door towards the airlock. Right outside the door, she selected the squad members she wished to take with her, signaling them to her with her choice. Cerberus, huh? She thought to herself as she automatically clicked Garrus' name. Going to need someone who can out-power their forces. I don't need a biotic if we're going to be siding with other biotics on the way out… Hmm… She looked back into the dark of the room, ah yes… With that, she selected Ashley. Enough soldier power beats out Cerberus any day, and I've got the biotics, shall we be in need of any. Within minutes, the elevator door opened and Ashley marched her way to the airlock, giving Shepard a quick nod and then standing next to her as she waited for orders.

Garrus still hadn't shown up yet, Shepard watched the elevator on the other side of the room, waiting for him to come out. In the corner of her eye, she saw EDI stand up straight, "I'm getting word that Mr. Vakarian is busy at the moment and cannot assist you on this mission."

Shepard narrowed her eyes, "The hell he isn't," She hooked her omnitool up with his, "Garrus, you get your big blue turian ass over here, we've got a mission to do."

"Diversion in five minutes, Commander." Joker called from around the corner.

"I am aware of that." She snapped back, waiting for a reply from Garrus, she glared at her omnitool.

"Diversion in four."

"Damn it," Shepard punched the call button to get Vega and stomped towards the elevator with Ashley quick on her heels. She slammed on the elevator control to go down to the docking bay.

There was a moment of silence between the two before Ashley slowly said, "Boy, you two much have had quite the fight last night or something. You've never gone on a mission without him." Shepard shot a dagger at her with her eyes. She was furious, there was no excuse or reason for him not to get there in time, he was up before her and everything. His armor had been gone from the room, so he must have gotten up before her.

Ashley folded her arms over her chest and cocked her hip, "Did you two get into a fight last night?"

Shepard closed her eyes for a moment and thought back, honestly, she didn't know what happened last night. She just remembered waking up today feeling groggy and disappointed. Did they fight last night?

She opened her mouth to answer her when there was a single slam on the door before it slowly opened, followed by huffing, and Vega swung himself around the corner, "I'm… I'm here…" He gasped as he looked at the two girls in the elevator—probably surprised that Garrus wasn't going along on the mission. He took a moment to catch his breath and stood up straight, using one arm to lean casually against the entrance while running his other hand through his hair to make sure it was gelled right, "To what do I owe the pleasure of going on a mission with the two most gorgeous chicas on the Normandy?" He tried to ask as Shepard pushed past him, grabbed her trusty assault rifle and submachine gun from the work bench, and headed towards the hanger where Cortez was calmly waiting.

"Shut up and get in, Vega." She said over her shoulder, as she climbed into the tiny ship.

He put his hands up as he followed her and Ashley to it, "I don't think so, Lola, that's a bit too fast for me. Usually I'd take you out for a couple of drinks first before…"

Shepard stabbed him a few times with her eyes until he finally took the hint and shuffled in, stepping between the two girls and laying his arms on their opposite shoulders to pull them closer to him, "I must be a lucky guy." He laughed to himself.

"Keep dreaming, Vega," Ashley retorted as Shepard plucked Vega's hand from her shoulder.

"Diversion in one." Came the voice over the intercom. Cortez crawled in front.

"Thanks, Joker." The doors of the hanger closed and Cortez started it up.

"So here's the deal, team: Cerberus. Biotic academy." She leaned against the wall as the Normandy opened its hull. Something in the back of her mind kept on screaming and she couldn't turn it off, she added on, "We've got to be quick. We don't want any unwanted casualties." A face came into her head and then vanished before she could recognize it. A lost scene in a broken memory that never existed. She shook it off and nodded to her team. The same one she walked onto Mars with right after the Reapers invaded. Before she had Garrus back.

She stayed standing and watched out the front as the hanger slipped from the bottom of the Normandy and headed towards the planet. Grissom Academy. Why did that seem so familiar?

Within moments the ship was where it was supposed to be and Cortez dropped them off. As the door opened and they jumped down and made formation with guns drawn and eyes aware, it felt strange to her that there wasn't that familiar voice there to say some kind of optimistic chant as they started their mission. She already missed that voice, ached for it deep within. When the first bullets were shot, they hit her shields without reaction as she took a moment to open her mind back up to the real world. She threw a shockwave and dove smoothly for cover, her mind still aching with that lost feeling.

A trooper appeared a few feet ahead of her and she rolled out of the way of the grenade he threw, feeling her chest puff and her biotic energy cocoon her, she slammed herself into his hunched body and knocked him against the wall behind him—the impact from her body to his killed him instantly.

Wimp.

She took cover from the rest of the main fire as she took a breather, closing her eyes and listening carefully to find the exact location of most of the Cerberus forces. She had one chance at this before they parted, she took an extra moment of rest. The ticking of a grenade made her open her eyes again, and in one swift movement, she thrust herself onto the concrete block she was taking cover behind, charged a Centurion at the center of the group, then used her momentum to push off his body and into the air, then slammed a cascade of biotics into the ground, knocking everyone off their feet and killing most of them. With them off guard, she punched the nearest trooper in the jaw, snapping his neck in one blow, then spun and grabbed another one and used him as a shield to another who had regained his balance, and then threw a shockwave at him to finish him off after he succeeded in killing his own squad mate.

As she let his body fall from her hands, she could smell the putrid scent of the Illusive Man's failure. She glanced around as her own team killed off any stragglers who she didn't kill in the blast. It was the horrid smell of something that could never be done. Reapers and Cerberus were never meant to coincide, no man and machine could become one. The more time and effort the Illusive Man put into trying to gain control of his minions through the same technology that the Reapers' used to gain their forces, the less human they seemed to become. While their obedience was unmatched and unbreakable, individual thoughts claimed their humanity and crumbled it to dust. With one step forward in the development of what a human really could be, so stepped back the tools of what they were.

She lifted her gun and examined it. The more she became a living weapon of her own, the less bullets she used throughout time. In some ways, the melding between herself and her gun created a more superior breed and left other creations in the dust. Saren once believed that melding between organics and synthetics was the only true way to make everyone equal. But no one would ever be truly equal to another. There was no way to perfectly equalize organic and synthetic traits. As Shepard was human, kept alive by synthetic parts, she would still always be human. The Reapers try to create synthetics from organic material, but they will only be what they're made from.

Shepard shivered as she thought of the human Reaper she and her team stopped from its full creation. Human genetic paste, bound together by synthetic bonds, it formed as a human figure instead of its usual form as a Reaper. It would always be mostly organic, as that was its roots and what it grew from.

She took a moment to ponder over the origins of the Reapers and whether or not they were created from organics like the one they found in the Collector base before Ashley and Vega made their way over to her.

"Where to now, Lola?"

"This way." She nodded towards a slightly opened door on one end of the hallway and they headed out. All the way, her head kept screaming at her about something and someone, but she couldn't tell what it was.

...

Shepard examined the remains of the Atlas that she just stepped out of, it was a miracle she had gotten out in time at all. Something was really slowing her down, she just didn't seem as aware and agile as she usually was. At least it was great to see Jack again, but she seemed somehow… Different. An air around her that made Shepard feel flustered, uncoordinated, and, in some ways, out of place. She seemed kind of frustrated, sort of in a panic—a side of her that Shepard had never seen before. It felt as if there was something strange about this whole ordeal, like she was so used to it already and it just seemed a bit repetitive. It seemed somewhat… Out of person. She looked over her shoulder to see Jack pacing in front of her students, yelling out orders that Shepard couldn't fully understand.

Hurry… Shepard heard herself say, they still had a ways to go. Ashley watched the group from a distance, messing with her gun over a flower pot, but Shepard had no idea where Vega went. She kept an eye on Jack, she seemed a little warn out and weak, but her underlying determination covered that in her voice, but it waivered more than usual.

She stood and joined the group, standing beside Jack with her hands behind her back formally, being careful not to be in the way of her pacing; the rest of her squad stood behind her. A glance at them sent another out of body feeling through her body. It seemed like ages since she didn't have Garrus with her on her team, and it struck her with a strong feeling of anger and remorse every time she thought about it. She sighed and started to listen in on her orders.

"Prangley and Boyle, I want you two to stay on the back line, you're going to be the main defense. Don't you let anyone break past you. Rodriguez and Harrison, you two will have the mid-range attack, protect the defense, but give the offense some backup fire. Jacquot will come with me, we will sabotage the Cerberus ship and take control of it—attack anything that moves." She pointed to each of them individually as she called their last names.

"This is our one way to get out of here and we're low on ammo, so conserve what you can from the Cerberus freaks and use your powers as much as you can handle. And remember, whatever happens, just keep on fighting. I don't give a fuck what those assholes try to tell you, they are not the answer. They're going to do tests on you and put you through so much pain, you can barely concentrate enough to wish you could die. That's not going to happen to you, I won't let it." She slowed as she finished that last statement and give a shifty glance towards Shepard, but not directly towards her, her mind kind of far off in memories and hurt. Shepard nodded to her to urge her on, and she turned her head back and her voice hardened again. She stood still as she continued.

"We will move in a group of layers, each of you working on what I told you to. Stick together, don't knock each other over, and whatever it takes—whatever happens…" She lifted her chin and looks at each and every one of them, "Don't let them take you alive."

That final statement left Shepard's head spinning. It was more serious to her than Shepard originally realized. "Move out!" She yelled, and the group filled in their formation and raced for the door. Jack opened it quickly and charged out into the open, sending out a quick blast of force to knock any troopers aside. Shepard and her squad took a moment before snapping to attention and running after them with their guns out. Shepard felt her mind slowing as she scanned the battlefield.

As the students and Jack ran as fast as they could through the midst of the enemy forces, the space around them exploding with blue as they pounded the troopers and knocked them from their feet. It was clear that their focus was to open the path, not to kill. Jack, though, took on every Cerberus trooper with care, Shepard watched as Jack lifted a Centurion into the air and ripped their body brutally into two pieces and threw it into two different directions.

Shepard covered their heels, shooting any enemies that took more than a hit from the biotic students to put down. She kept an eye on the first squad in front of her. They seemed to be getting farther and farther away, so she ran faster. The Cerberus ship was in sight, but as the biotic team was closing in on it, they began to lift off. Angry, Jack yelled out a command to her students and together they pulled the ship down with their biotics, trying to keep it from taking off without them. It came down suddenly, and came towards the group. Shepard watched in horror as the group separated to dodge the ship, only when the dust fell and the loud scratching of the metal ship to the ground ceased, did Shepard realize:

Rodriguez didn't move fast enough.

The scene slowed down as the ship crushed the student, the loud scratching of the ship's metal against the ground caused an explosion in Shepard's head. She skidded to a stop, and the screaming in her head gradually got louder, until it finally took up her entire auditory range. With a sudden pang of distorted agony, heart-aching despair, and regretful remorse—all the feelings, Shepard noticed, but surprise—she realized that the screaming came from Jack. Shepard had never heard a more pain-staking scream in her long life. She felt her gun loosen in her grip and fall from her hands before she collapsed to the ground after it.

Part of the ship was in flames from the impact, there were a couple of other screams as the students started to realize what had happened to one of their friends. The Cerberus soldiers took on no sympathy for their fallen comrades, having nothing to lead them forward but the constant whisper of their mission in control of their thoughts. Shepard got to her feet and started towards the students. Together they made a powerful force, but separated and emotionally distraught, they were weakened.

Suddenly a harsh wave of shadows gnawed at the sides of her head, slowing down her thoughts and movements. She swung around just in time to push a Cerberus phantom away before it stabbed her. In the same motion, she charged her and put a few rounds through her barriers before it ducked away and disappeared. Slightly surprised and bewildered from its oddly enhanced speed and agility, Shepard took another moment to scan the area instead of wearing herself out from power use while hitting nothing. It appeared again at her side and swung her blade to stab her in the back. Those familiar oily shadows wavering along the sides of her vision. Indoctrination. The waves brought a high pitched ringing, leaving Shepard panicked, she quickly wielded her gun against the blade as she dodged out of its range; sacrificing her rifle for her life.

She rolled out of the way a few times and smoothly grabbed her submachine gun and hurled herself around a poll to face her attacker again, blaring it rapidly as she knew she had plenty of shots. She had fought many phantoms before, but none of them were like this one. It moved faster and quieter, thinking through its movements and actions against her rather than mindlessly attacking. Its indoctrinated eyes glowed narrowly through its mask as it dodged Shepard's shots and gracefully jumped off a crate and straight towards her, blade extended.

Wrong move. Shepard's mind stalled and she took longer to dodge out of the way than she first anticipated, the screeching in her ears getting louder. She moved barely in time, the phantom slashed at her leg and cut through the armor. Shepard grunted in pain as the blade broke skin and gouged itself deep into her calf. But she kept moving. As the phantom check its balance, she smashed her backwards into the crate with a shockwave, then collided with it hard enough to knock the blade from her hands. She wielded it quickly in exchange, aiming to stab it fatally into its torso. But it moved just in time and vanished. But not before Shepard returned the favor and sliced open its shoulder with its own blade.

Just then, she heard another disembodied scream, she looked to see the group of biotics being swarmed by Cerberus soldiers. Dozens of them, blocking Shepard off from them. In the midst of them was the unarmed phantom. Damn it, that thing moves fast… She cursed as she took a few steps and felt her leg burning as blood started pouring from her wound. She looked to either side of her, looking for Ashley, but she was nowhere to be found. The earth slowed to heartbeats as she finally got full control of her thoughts, the frantic screams of Jack and her students as the soldiers took them over sped up her adrenaline as she heard shots being fired.

"NO!" She screamed, infatuated with anger, gripping her gun in one hand and the phantom sword with the other before she charged herself into one of the troopers, lodging the sword through his entire body. She left it there and continued to use her momentum to swing around her gun to back-hand the butt into another trooper's neck. A Centurion caught what was happening and started to place her in his sights, but not before Shepard charged him, her armed hand curled upwards as she collided with him, pulling the trigger and exploding his head with incinerary rounds. With her other hand, she knocked a line of troopers off their feet with a shockwave as she regained her balance. That left only three more. A quick scan of the area told her that the phantom was nowhere to be found. She raced towards the one closest to her, letting out a war cry as she punched him with all her strength; finishing him off with a couple of shots. The next, she tackled against a supply box, holding his shoulders down with her elbow and kicked him in the groin hard enough to break his back, then smashed herself into the last one with another charge, killing him instantly.

She took a breather as she finished off the troopers that she knocked over earlier with a shockwave, keeping her mind open and eyes out for the strange phantom. The adrenaline stopped screaming in her ears and she looked around for the biotic group. On either side of the crashed ship were the bloody remains of each of the students. She felt a painful ache as she looked at their bodies, feeling as if it was ultimately her fault. It felt almost like a nostalgic feeling. Memories flowed hard into her head as she counted slowly in her head: Two… Three… That's Rodriguez beneath the ship… Four… She thought harshly, feeling a painful draining on the back of her head as she examined the crash site. Then spotted the youngest of them, Jacquot–or at least she could only guess it was her, her face was so mutilated that Shepard could only guess by her size and build.

She had obviously taken her own life when Cerberus surrounded them.

Five…

She counted them all to be dead. Two of them from self-inflicted wounds and others by an oddly close-ranged pistol shot to the head. Cerberus wouldn't do that if their goal was to capture these students for themselves. Shepard's heart ached. They were only students.

But someone was missing. And so was the sword from the trooper's body.

Suddenly, Shepard heard scuffling behind her, and just barely glanced a figure dashing into the dark of the bunker. She chased it through the door, spotting the dead remains of the phantom—a gash through its chest—at the large entrance. Seeing that the scene seemed clear of enemies, she waited until her eyes adjusted to the light. She blinked a few times.

After a certain point, she recognized a dark figure standing in front of her. It was fit, and agile-looking, clearly human, with something long, thin, and sharp in its hand. It was turned away, and it paid no heed to Shepard's presence. She felt the need to intimidate it with a gun, but had a strange feeling that she shouldn't. She moved slowly into the dark, her eyes still adjusting as she rounded out a path to start making her way to the front of the figure.

"…Hello?" Shepard asked hesitantly. She heard the figure let out a long exhale. In a sudden rush, Shepard was hit by the recognition of the figure and the identity of the missing biotic—about the same moment that the figure turned and slammed her into the side of the building with a shockwave.

Jack.

The impact knocked the breath from Shepard's lungs and left her head to collide with metal. She collapsed to the ground on her front and felt her mind spin frantically as it screamed for air. Her lungs caught for a moment before she could finally fill them. She looked up at her attacker as she drew closer, "Jack…" She croaked.

A boot lodged itself into her shoulder and she let out a huff of pain, "Jack!" she managed to hiss before she was lifted into the air and slammed into the wall again. Her entire body being held back from Jack's strong biotics, and her gun fell to the ground; she couldn't move beneath the blue glow, "Why are you doing this?" She whispered through the small amount of air she had in her crushed lungs.

Jack moved closer, lifting the sword that she took from the phantom to Shepard's throat, Shepard's eyes traveled along blade and spotted a familiar blue tint within Jack's eyes. Her eyes widened as she looked into Jack's eyes, seeing the ominous tri-pointed marking within them. Her heartbeat slowed and a slow, deep feeling of dread slid through her veins like sludge.

So that's what it has come down to. She felt her throat begin to open as the blade made a movement back.

You've lost, you know that, right? She could hear the reminisce of Saren's words echo in her head, and she felt every muscle in her body crumble, her will to fight disintegrated from her bones. In the corner of her eye, she could barely make out the shadow of a dark entity-almost like the residual memory of Saren-looming in the darkness, teeth glistening as he gazed upon the defeat of his enemy.

A shot rang out and the blade resided from Shepard's neck, Jack's body recoiled sideways and the sword fell from her hands; her biotic grip melted and Shepard crumbled to the ground, a hand weakly moving to her bleeding neck as she watched the scene begin to unfold. Jack moved quickly to see what had hit her, spotting the dark figure and running towards it, fists growing in blue. The figure held a long rifle, about the size of a Mantis, and pulled a small container out that glowed with its own light. Methodically, it placed the container into the gun and shot Jack in the head.

She fell to the ground with a suffocating whine, a small burn mark around the hole in her head.

The scene went still and the figure loaded another round and cased the rifle.

"Didn't think I'd let you have this party without me, did you?" Garrus made his way into the light and over to where Shepard sat, offering a hand to help her up.

"Garrus!" She took his and heaved herself to her feet, a hand still on her wound to tourniquet the bleeding, "I could have used you a few minutes earlier." She looked mournfully at Jack's body.

"Yeah, well, you know how it is when no one tells you how important the mission is and you have other things to do." He retorted, just as Ashley and Vega came into the bunker, guns drawn as they searched the area.

Shepard laughed, "like what? What could have been more important than this mission, Garrus?"

She looked back up at him, his blue eyes glowing in the dark.

Wait.

Glowing.

Garrus smiled, his face formed a snarl, "you can't save them all, Commander Shepard." In that moment, a presence moved behind her and she watched in panic as the phantom's sword impaled through her own ribs. She stood suspended in a state of horror and agony, blood pouring out of her in steady waves. The only thing she could do is let out a horrified exhale.

Ashley leaned her face over Shepard's shoulder, as the light started to drain from Shepard's eyes, "This is for Kaiden."

She relieved the blade from her body and Shepard collapsed to the ground, holding her abdomen and gazing up at her squadmates… her friends… her lover… as they sneered down as they watched her die, each of their eyes glowing a simple blue. Vega pulled out his pistol, "Now I have directed this point personally."

As her eyes darkened to the point where she could only make out shadows, Garrus kneeled down and prodded her side, "you see, the world is much easier when you don't even consider the gray."

Shepard let out one last fading gasp.

Her eyes opened again to the cool lighting of her courters. She looked around for a moment, seeing that Garrus was neatly curled around her with his arm over her body, and their clothing were both scattered around the couch. She looked at the time, 3:07 GTA. A cool chill on her cheeks alerted her and she touched her face and saw her eyes were slightly wet. She couldn't tell from what. She couldn't remember what happened last night, nor did she remember what she had dreamt about.

She slipped from underneath Garrus' arm carefully and moved slowly through the room. Moving past her private counsel, it automatically lit up. On the scene was surveillance tapes of Grissom Academy. Her thoughts came rolling back, and she could finally remember what had happened last night. She remembered herself re-watching the tapes over and over again, watching as the small team of student-biotics and Jack fought for their lives—without a main artillery team to lead the way, the team was helpless to all of the Cerberus forces. In the last push, they were surrounded, and Jack moved swiftly to kill any of the students who hadn't already been killed or killed themselves. The act itself shattering her mind of any sanity that she had had. Making herself vulnerable to the presence of strongly indoctrinated forces, and turning her into a phantom.

The last act she made of her own will was the bullet she put through her head.

This wasn't the first night Shepard had re-watched that footage over and over. Nor was it the first time she woke up with a feeling that she had had some kind of emotional dream pertaining to it. Always ending with her death, no matter what she did.

But this was the first night that Garrus had been indoctrinated too.

She glanced back at him, sound asleep on her bed. It hurt, just thinking about it. She decided to take a shower to get her mind off it. Taking off her night lingerie and getting into the hot water. She ran the water over her hair and then turned to let it go down her back.

Somehow she couldn't tell if the burning feeling that was running down her face was water from the shower or tears.