6

"Minha vida é tipo um filme de Spyke Lee (my life is like a Spyke Lee movie)
Verdadeiro, complicado, mal-humorado e violento (real, complicated, grumpy and violent)
Você é bonito e eu sou feio (you are handsome and I am ugly)
Sua mãe te ama, mas eu te odeio (your mummy loves you, but I hate you)"

Champagne e água Benta – Charlie Brown Jr.

I can't decide if I should help Jean with her plan or not. She knows I have feelings for her and clearly wants to use me. What she doesn't seem to know is that I'm not an ass, nobody makes a fool outta me. Not even her!

I like Rogue, she's always been a good friend to me. I was truly honoured to be the first one she touched with confidence. I was the facilitator, she said. I'm glad my powers somehow helped her. I also know she decided to touch me in front of everybody not only because of my powers, but because she trusts me, that crazy southerner. I guess before she saw me as an unlikely father figure, but now, she sees me as a friend. I don't want to be a dick and ruin our mutual trust.

Plus, her relationship with Scott has been beneficial to me so far. I was hoping that his betrayed wife would look elsewhere for some proper loving. Besides, I love watching Scott wrecked as he is now. He's always believed he was fucking perfect. Ha! Perfect my ass! He now knows he's a mere imperfect mortal like the rest of us. Well, in fact, worse than me, I say! If I had Jean as my wife, I would never mess around. When I'm in, I'm in. It's hilarious to me how Mr. Right has proven to be imperfect, unfaithful and insincere. What a fall from grace! Ha ha! I always knew there was a jerk deep inside the four-eyed.

So back to Jean's plan, I don't know how I could get any profit out of this. The only good that could come out of it would be her fulfilling her part in the bargain and spending the night with me, you know, in my room. Just for one night, she said. Once she tastes Wolvie goodness, I seriously doubt it will be a one-time only deal. That's what I've been salivating about for God knows how long, but still, I'm not sure it's worth it. I'm not like that unfaithful bastard, I have standards and rules of conduct. I would never betray someone who's proven to be a good friend of mine. Yeah, I think I'll pass it.

Come think of it, maybe the red head wants to score and is using this whole plan-to-get-her-husband-back as an excuse to do so. I guess she knows I usually do anything for her, so I wouldn't be asking her to trade favours. Now would I do anything for her? Anything that doesn't involve me betraying my friends, I suppose.

I'm gonna call Rogue and see if we can go out tonight. Maybe if things are not going right, I could do what Jean wants and help Rogue indirectly so that way it would be a win win deal. Also I want to get plastered. I think better when I'm not sober.

"What's up, Anna? Do you have plans for tonight?"

"Hi Logan. Tonight? I was thinking… I want to go out tonight an kiss some seriously hot guys." She said and giggled a little. It reminded me of the drunken night we made out a little. We were totally wasted and I started kissing her, she didn't resist at first but snapped out of it and slapped my face really hard when my wandering hands touched her ass. That's how it began, that's how it ended, in less than a minute. But everyone in the mansion seems to think we have a thing going on. That couldn't be any further away from reality. They have implied many times that me and Rogue have already fucked, but we didn't and I really wanted to tell Gambit. Tell him that what we did have was a minute of drunken madness and it didn't mean anything and was never ever mentioned again. But Anna didn't let me do it. She said that's her way of making him pay for all the times he slept with other women while pretending to be her loving trustworthy boyfriend. I told her a guy has needs, she couldn't do it, Gumbo found some girls who could, not a big deal. But she told me off and called me a male chauvinist pig. So I kept my mouth shut and Gumbo makes a disgusted face whenever he sees me anywhere near Rogue. I can't even look her way in his presence that makes a face.

"Ok, Anna. We can have a few pints and then you can do whatever you please."

"Hummm. Deal then. But why do you sound so desperate to get high, huh?"

"Since when do we need a reason to drink?"

"Ok, I got your point. Listen, can I bring Remy along?"

"Well, I have nothing against him, I like him, I do, but the guy hates me. Why do you want to bring him? You guys will always have the end of the night… And, what about the kissing you said you wanted to do?"

"That's exactly why! He needs to see it! Feel what I've felt! Also, I'm… I'm getting weak and… I think… er… I guess I'm falling with him all over again. I need to do something about it."

"God damn it, Anna! He's never meant for you to see anything. You followed him!"

"You men are admirably a united bunch of bastards. You're always defending him, even though he accuses you with his eyes every time he sees us together. Well, I gotta go now. I'll track him and invite him to come. It's decided."

"Will you invite him only? Ha! I'm sure you'll do much more than just inviting him. And then, my dear friend, if you say you think you're falling, once you guys do it again, you'll be kissing your heart goodbye for once and for all. The guy seems to have a talent with the ladies from what I hear. I have no idea how you have this thing you have going on, whatever you call it, for this long and still claim you don't love him. I don't think you're falling, Rogue, you were never out of it to start with. "

She bitched about what I said a bit and hang up a minute later. I guess I gave her something to think about.

I got a bit pissed that Gambit is coming because that way I won't be able to talk about Scott tonight as I'd planned. I'll have to find some other time in her busy schedule of training, teaching, fucking my beloved one's husband, fucking her own man, going to strip classes or whatever it is that she calls it. Fuck! This is going to be harder than I thought! I might as well go to the war room, program Sabretooth and have my fun. That will take my mind away of other people's problems and make me happy. And maybe later, I'll go talk to Jean, not about her stupid plan, but talk about us. Me and her. She thinks she loves the four-eyes, but I'm sure she's got a little crush on me. She's had enough of perfection, I'm sure she likes my grumpy ways. At least I have always been true to her, never hid my feelings. Yes, man, I think I might be very close to getting what I want now. Closer than ever before.

.

.

.

I had gathered all my self-respect and courage, I was determined to tell her to fuck off and forget we were ever an item. I was going to say 'no' to her for the first time. But she came again, looking as hot as ever, but at the same time, there was something about her which reminded me of her old self. I can't say what it is, whatever it was it disarmed me. I tried to ignore all that, but she was so delicate, touched my hair lovingly, gave me a little kiss, and oh yes, silly me I gave it all in. So much for trying!

We did it yet again, but it was different this time. She wasn't hungry as always, we took it slow, spent a long time kissing and caressing each other before actually doing it. And there went all my hope of talking seriously once it was all over. I want to end it all. I think I still do. I don't want to share her with anyone, specially not with him. This has got to end.

Interestingly enough, when I finally take this decision, that's when she surprises me with little things that make me want to go back on my decision. Last night, I was sleeping and remember her kissing me as I slept. Was it a dream? I don't think it was. I remember feeling it. I must've been too tired, I should've woken up and asked her what it was all about. Then earlier today, she calls me and asks me out. She hasn't done that in ages. Now my silly old heart is filled with hope and joy. I can't help but wonder if she loves me. Or could it be that she's realized she's losing me and just can't let me go? I know I'm a fool, but I can't lie to myself, I truly hope it's the first option.

…

I included an extract of a song by Brazilian "skate rock" band Charlie Brown Jr because it's "very Wolverine". If you like rock, punk rock, you can find this song on youtube.

Originally I had a song for each chapter but decided against having them in the English version. Also, chapter 7 will be the last one I'll translate as it was the last one that I had published, after that I'll be writing brand new chapters for you guys. I have lots of ideas already, so I hope it will all work out. I promise I won't leave it incomplete.

Thanks for the latest reviews. It always brightens my day.