Sheesh, it's been a while! I'm really sorry, guys. I've decided that it's time to finish up both of my long unattended stories (this one and The Man Behind The Mask), because it seems that I'm terribly unreliable about updating. And as a reader of fanfic, I know how annoying that can be. This is to be the last chapter of Two Birds, and the next TMBTM update will likely be the last one for that, too, unless there's some crazy demand for more. Anyhow, you've all been great for sticking with this fic for so long, and I hope you like how it's turned out!

Cheers,

Lorraine

Previously on Two Birds…

"Wait," said James, who did not seem to be too comforted by this new information from Remus, "do you mean to tell me that Lily did sleep with Padfoot because you told her to, Moony?" he continued, his question becoming an angry shout.

Remus backed away, trying to avoid James' fury, promising "No! No, no, no, Prongs! You've got the absolute wrong idea! See, what happened was—"

But this was where Lily cut in, almost as enraged as the black-haired boy in front of her. "Excuse me, Potter? Please do not insinuate A. that I would have sex because someone told me to, and B. that I would ever so much as hold hands with your mangy mutt of a best mate!" she glared, and the familiar sight of an irate Lily seemed to calm James down a bit. When he registered what she'd said, he relaxed even further.

"Thank Merlin for that," he sighed. "Only, now I'm confused," he continued, brow furrowing. "Moony, what's going on?"

CHAPTER 6

The young werewolf stepped forward cautiously, still not sure what level James' temper was at. Determined to clear up the situation as quickly as possible (and before James and Lily could come to blows, as was the precedent for many of their arguments), Remus began to explain.

"Well, ah, Prongs, remember that time when Sirius was getting on you for your obsession-" he paused at James' glare, "Sorry, fondness of Lily?"

James raised his eyebrows. "You mean every day, Moony?" he asked, causing the redhead to blush and Sirius to shrug unconcernedly.

"Sure, but more specifically yesterday. At breakfast," Remus clarified.

Peter interjected, "When you yelled at him, and then stormed out to write your Mum." Lucy sniggered, and James glared at her.

"I did not 'storm out,' Wormtail, and if you think that was yelling, then you clearly haven't paid much attention to my arguments with Evans over there." Lily crossed her arms.

"Oh, don't lie, Prongs, you were in a right strop. And I reckon you're working yourself up again right this very instant," Sirius contributed. James glared at his best mate and opened his mouth to retort.

"Oi, you lot! I'm giving an explanation, remember?" Remus said loudly, in an exasperated tone. James returned his attention to the young werewolf, and gestured for him to continue.

"So, at breakfast yesterday we were complaining about Sirius' unfortunate tendency to drive us barmy with all his bragging, and then Lily walks in. Which, of course, led to a lecture—sorry, discussion—about that Lily makes you a better person, and all that. And your explanation gave me an idea about how to fix the Sirius problem—Padfoot, if you want to make a joke, keep in mind that Peter is poised to smack you—but I needed Lily's help."

James, brow furrowed, was obviously not following. The typically impatient Lily decided to step in and attempt to clear things up.

"And so, James," the bespectacled boy's eyebrows shot up at the use of his given name, "Remus found me by the lake and explained that I should try to seduce Sirius, and then withhold any sexual compensation until he started to behave better."

James, beginning to put things together, clarified, "So, he wanted you to be a tease? Good personnel choice, Moony," he joked, not without bitterness. (Lily elbowed Lucy when she muttered "That's what I said!")

"Oi! I am not a tease. Can we just get that straight?" the redhead cut in. Five heads turned towards her, wearing identical skeptical smirks. Lily deflated a bit. "I do not tease James! I don't flirt, or chat, or anything! I don't even talk to him about lessons! Honestly, how can it be considered teasing when I don't ever give him a chance?"

"I'm right here, you know," James grumbled.

Lily whirled around to face him. "Yes, I know! So, fine then, you explain it to me. How do I tease you? How is it that I drive you crazy when I do my best to ignore you entirely?"

"But that's just it, Lily! You don't ignore me, you argue with me. You point out my flaws. You laugh at my mistakes. No, it's not exactly friendly, but it shows that you are at the very least invested in our relationship—such as it is. If you didn't care at all, you would just brush me off and not even bother to insult me. But you do—Merlin knows how much you insult me." Though poised to speak, Lily couldn't really come up with a rejoinder to that one. James noticed, and this brought a smile to his face—the first Lily had seen him wear all day. "So, I don't know, Lily. Can you explain it to me?"

"But I… I don't even like you! You're…well, you're mean to the Slytherins, and to the younger students. And you're so boastful all the time. And…and you have terrible table manners!" Lily was grasping at straws, and she knew it. So, apparently, did her friends.

Sirius calmly picked apart her argument. "Lils, be honest with yourself. When was the last time Prongs here hexed anyone—even Snivellus—without significant provocation? And, as far as we've noticed, he barely brags at all anymore," Sirius looked to Peter and Remus for confirmation, and they nodded. "As for his table manners, you can probably fix those up right quick."

"And in comparison to Padfoot, he's a master of etiquette," Remus contributed dryly, causing Sirius to smack him on the shoulder.

"As I was saying, Lily, love: you do like James. And it's high time you stopped lying to yourself about it," Sirius finished.

Lily looked around helplessly, trying to find an ally in her group of friends. Knowing the Marauders wouldn't be on her side, she turned pleadingly to Lucy, giving her the best-friend eye-signal for "help get me out of this unfortunate situation!"

But Lucy was having none of it today. "Lily. Sweetie. Would you just stop being an ungrateful dimwit and accept it already? You and Potter are meant to be together. You've got more best-friend seals of approval than you could possibly need, not to mention that the poor fool is in love with you. He's hot, you're hot, now just get together and make some hot babies, okay? Everyone will be much happier for it." At this point in her speech, four faces were gaping at her, and one—Sirius'—was thrown back, shouting in laughter.

As Sirius laughed at her expense, Lily began to retreat into herself, rapidly becoming unwilling to discuss the matter further. This managed to sober up the Black heir, who knew this might be the best chance he had to secure everlasting happiness for his best friend. He grabbed the redhead by the shoulders, forcing her green eyes to look into his grey ones, and delivered the coupe de grâce.

"Lily Evans. You are perfect for James Potter, and I am going to tell you a story about how I discovered this. For the past six years, I have looked on as my best mate fell madly in love with you, and until yesterday, I honestly thought he was insane. Sure, you're pretty, and smart, and funny, but so are plenty of other birds. And you singlehandedly put our Prongs through so much heartbreak that, had he been anyone but the compassionate guy he is, at this point he'd be as jaded as I am—and that, my dear, is saying something," Sirius joked lightly.

"But then yesterday, Lily, I learned some things." Lily, sensing a rare bout of honesty coming from the young man in front of her, could only stand and listen as he ticked off the reasons why she should love James. "I now know that you like Quidditch, and hate Madam Puddifoots. I know that you're a decent chess player, and you like Oscar Wilde, and you're not too polite to take the last bite of tapioca, even without asking. You're strong and determined in almost any situation, but a spider will send you fleeing from the room. You're clever and cunning—you did figure out about Moony's furry little problem, after all—but fiercely loyal (seeing as you haven't told anyone). If ever there were ever to be an honorary Marauder, Evans, it'd be you." Deciding to take this as a compliment this time, Lily smiled at Sirius, who gave her a reassuring one-armed squeeze.

Now it was time for Remus to take her hand, and look at her earnestly. "You know our greatest secrets, Lil, and you share some of our greatest traits—if I do say so myself. And if you fit in with the lot of us, then how can you possibly argue that you're not the right girl for James?"

Sensing that the speeches were done, Lily turned to look at the boy in question. James' face was unreadable—eyes carefully masked behind his glasses. "Well…" she said, considering what her best move was, now. She began to smile, her eyes twinkling like green amber. "Well, boys, when you put it that way…"

And with that, she marched right up to James and grabbed the back of his neck, pulling his forehead down to hers. As if by reflex, his arms snaked around her waist. Smirking slightly, Lily noticed that his eyes weren't nearly so blank now—rather, they showed joy, confusion, desire, and, if she was judging correctly, a teensy bit of fear.

Leaning up ever so slightly, in order that her lips just brushed James', Lily whispered to the messy-haired boy: "What do you say we start making better use of that shared dormitory, Potter? Only, I reckon I'll need a little convincing before I trek all the way back up there…"

Full-on grinning, now, James was only too happy to oblige. He closed the infinitesimal gap between Lily's lips and his, determined to kiss his way into her good graces.

And Lily had to admit, the boy's technique was flawless. When he gently licked her bottom lip, she couldn't help but sigh, giving him room to slip his tongue against hers, coaxing a spontaneous moan from her throat. She could almost feel him grinning as he took her bottom lip between his teeth, toying with it until he pushed his warm tongue back into her mouth.

When James' hands moved lower on her back, Lily took it as a signal to jump and wind her legs around his middle—and James could not have been more pleased with this interpretation. He walked forward, backing her up against the birch tree, and began to trail wet, breathy kisses across her jaw and down the column of her neck.

Winding her fingers into James' already-tousled hair as she gasped for air, Lily's eyes flickered open for a moment, and she saw the retreating backs of her four friends. Sirius seemed to be handing Lucy a handful of coins, and Peter was just shaking his head in amusement. Lily vaguely heard Remus' deep chuckle as he turned to Sirius, saying, "You know, Padfoot, if you really did start behaving better, this whole operation would have killed two birds with one stone."

Just at that moment, two girls were approaching the departing foursome, twirling their hair and whispering to each other, while sneaking glances at the Black's eldest son. Sirius grinned at Remus, slapping him on the back. "Don't push your luck, Moony," was the last thing Lily heard before James recaptured her mouth, effectively invading all of her senses.

THE END.

Thanks for reading, everyone! I'd love to have your final thoughts, if you'd be so kind as to let me have them.