Sorry I haven't updated in awhile! Not my fault! But-Hazah!-a new chapter is afoot! Dun dun dun!
I don't anything!!!
Playlist For Chapter:
Secret Agent Man-Jonny Rivers
Mission Impossible Theme Song
The Hell Song-Sum41
Chapter 6--Lioness To Grizzly
"So what's the plan?" I whispered as we silently walked down the halls during our Geography class. Yeah, we're skipping class. It's too late to save my reputation with the teachers now. I swear Emmett is using some kind of mind-control shampoo on me or something.
"Come on, I'll tell you in H.Q.," he whispered before taking my wrist and pulling me down another hallway.
"H.Q.?" I asked with a raised eyebrow.
"Headquarters," he told me.
"I know what that means," I hissed at him.
"Right here," he said, opening a janitor's closet and pushing me in. He shut the door behind him and flicked on the light. I blinked in surprise as he set Jeff on a reclining chair and then plopped down on a little loveseat. There was a coffee table by the loveseat and another table with a little TV on it. Then there was a shelf containing a bunch of prank supplies. He had this place all set up!
"Emmett, when did you do all this?" I asked incredulously as I picked up Jeff, put her on the table, and sat in the chair.
"You know when I went to the bathroom second period?" he asked. I nodded my head. "It's amazing what can be accomplished in a mere two minutes," he said.
"And the janitors aren't going to say anything?" I asked with a raised eyebrow.
"I stole the keys and changed the locks to double-bolt. The only way they're going to get in here is if they brake the door down and I'll know when they're planning to do that," he said easily.
"How?" I asked.
"My spy cams," he said. "Observe," he said slyly before flicking on the little TV. I stared in surprise as four separate rooms appeared. One showed the entire hall that this room was in. Another showed the front office where the secretary was typing away on her computer. Another was the entire cafeteria, you could see the entire thing and even into the kitchen a little bit. The last screen was the principals office. She was on her phone and looking over the computer all at once.
I grinned slyly at Emmett and we pounded fists. We're in.
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I watched from H.Q. as Emmett crept down-aw jeez! He's even got me calling the freaking closet Headquarters. Oh man.
Anyway, he crouched down behind a garbage can near the entrance to the office. He looked at the camera and waved as he spoke into his Walkie-talkie. "Hey Bella! Can you see me?" he asked excitedly.
"Yep," I said into mine.
He gave me a thumbs up and calmed down a bit. "Grizzly Bear to Lioness, Grizzly Bear to Lioness. My position is locked and I am ready to approach the subject. Do I have a clear?" he asked seriously into the talkie.
My eyes flickered around the screen. Hall clear, lunch room still empty, secretary still typing, and principal in position.
"Targets are in position and base is all clear," I told him.
I watched him as he tugged on his ear lobe and stood up-signaling that he's going in. I watched him as he walked confidently up to the desk, up to the secretary. His Walkie-talkie clicked on and I grinned. "Hello, how can I help you dear?" the secretary asked.
"My sister Bella threw up in the cafeteria," he told her. "She's in the bathroom right now and I wasn't sure who to tell…," he trailed off, pretending to be a bit anxious. Aw, what a loving brother!
"Oh my," the woman said, standing up. "I'll go with Mr. Bates and get it all cleaned up. When your sister comes out of the bathroom you can meet in here Mr…," she trailed off, not knowing his name.
"Brown. Jason Brown," he told her. I snorted a laugh. That was that kid from gym! Brilliant!
"Alright, I'll be back in about fifteen minutes," she said before scurrying out of the room.
Emmett waited until she was out of hearing distance and raised the talkie up to his mouth. "What a nice woman. I almost feel bad for tricking her…nah!" he said as he chuckled. "Alright Lioness, Grizzly is in position. Have the targets located the decoy?" he asked.
I looked back at the bottom screen, the one that showed the lunchroom. In the far corner of the floor is a little creation that Emmett and I concocted. Microwaved wet dog food. Sprinkle some crushed nuts, a couple bacon bits and-BAM-your very own home-made vomit.
I watched as the secretary and a janitor with a mop approached the back corner of the lunch room where I 'threw up.' They both walked towards it and stopped. Not because they wanted to-but because they were stuck. Contact Super Glue. One of the most wonderful inventions ever created.
I watched with a slight smirk on my face as they tried to pry their feet off the ground. Finally, the janitor decided to do the most obvious thing and take off his shoes. But Emmett had already super glued those too. I don't know how he did it-but he did.
"The targets are jammed and I'm on my way," I told him.
"Make sure you bring the goods. Over," Emmett said.
"Copy that," I said as I grabbed the backpack that was resting on the table-Jeff tucked in one of the sections, her head and arms poking out. What? She said we had to take her everywhere…
I slipped out of the closet, locking the door behind me and bolted silently down the hall and into the office. "Bout time you showed up," Emmett said as he stood up.
I rolled my eyes. "That took me four seconds," I hissed at him.
"Yeah, well, it would've taken me three," he said childishly.
I rolled my eyes and lead the way to the principal's door and knocked lightly. "Come in Tiffany," the principal called-isn't that sad? I don't even know the principal's name. Tsk. Tsk.
Emmett opened the door and we both slowly walked in. she looked at the two of us with a raised eyebrow. "And how may I help you two?" she asked, folding her hands and looking at us condescendingly. I fought the urge to roll my eyes. Come on. We were both older than this woman.
Emmett sat down on the chair in front of her desk and I followed his lead, not sure where this was going. I knew where'd it'd end-just not exactly which to turn we'd take where. "Well you see, I have this problem," Emmett started.
"And what is this problem of yours?" she asked.
"Well, I believe one of the faculty members is being purposely rude and condescending to my sister and I and I don't appreciate that at all. I'm not sure what to do about it," he said. "I mean," he began, cutting her off as she opened her mouth to speak. "I normally solve this kind of problem by hitting them but I don't think that'd be acceptable here," he said, sounding completely sincere as he spoke. Oh jeez.
"Well you are most certainly correct," she said, sounding slightly astonished.
"So you can help?" I asked.
"Well there's not much I can do for you," she said.
"Aren't you supposed to be there boss or something? You can tell them to stop making asses out of themselves when we correct them," Emmett said bluntly. Ah. This is where he's going with it? He wants to wild her up beforehand. Pretty good idea.
"Excuse me young man but I will not tolerate that kind of behavior in my school," she said, standing up. Oh, bad move lady.
"Well excuse us old woman but don't wish to be spoken to disrespectfully," I shot back before I could stop myself.
"I am calling your parents and we are all going to sit down and have a talk," she said, sitting back down her chair as she typed furiously on her computer, glancing back at us to glare every once in a while.
"Oh, I don't think you want to do that," Emmett said with a sly grin as we stood up slowly.
She pushed slightly away from her desk and crossed her arms over her chest. "And why not?" she asked in a deadly voice. Then we moved so fast we blurred.
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I sat criss-crossed on the top of principal what's-her-butt's desk as Emmett sprawled across the floor. "That was way too easy," he said, looking at the mobile screen for the spy cams. The janitor and secretary were still stuck to the floor and were now just sitting there, trying to pull their shoes off the ground. It's only been about three minutes so the halls were still empty and Principal Fluff-and-Stuff is tied up, and locked in her closet with her new bright purple hair. It looks just fabulous.
Emmett suddenly jumped up excitedly. "I know what we can do," he said, jumping over the desk and plopping down in the rolly chair. He grabbed the intercom thing and pulled it towards him. I grinned. Brilliant. He flipped it on and cleared his throat. "Attention students of Willington High; Jason Brown you are requested not to call Isabella McCarty a bitch. Her family will meet you in the parking lot after school. Please enjoy your weekend," Emmett said, making his voice deeper as he spoke in a serious tone. I grinned at him and he slid the intercom over to me, giving me a thumbs up.
I cleared my throat and flipped it back on. "Excuse this interruption but would Mr. Banner please report to the front of the school. Your life partner is waiting outside and he wishes to give you a pair of your underwear since you aren't wearing any. He also requests that you do not soil them this time," I said in a serious monotone before turning it off. (That is not supposed to offend anyone, it's just meant to be funny.)
Emmett burst out laughing. "Okay, okay! I got a good one," he said, excitedly grabbing the intercom. "Attention students; testicles, that is all," he said before flipping it off. We both howled with laughter at the stupidity and high-fived.
"You two are in so much trouble."
Our eyes went wide at the sound of the voice and we slowly turned around. "Hi Mom," we both said sheepishly.
OOoOooOOOHHhhhHHHhh! They've been caught! Shit! Favorite parts?? Favorite line???