Big Brother: LOTR Style.
Author's Note: dodges flying food I'M SO SORRY! I actually lsot some inspiration for my story, until today that is. SO if you're lucky, you migth get two chapters, in the same day! Woot! Anyway, Please, forgive me!
Reviews:
Fool-ova-Took: Thanks! Sorry for the long wait!
Dragon's Blade: Yeah, don't know where that came from, just kind hit me! In truth, it was my favorite part of ths fic.
Rae Simmons: Yeah, I've never been good about catching those kinda things! Thanks though!!!
Chapter 6: Confessions, part dos.
In the confessional, the producers where biting nails, pulling out hair, and rocking backward and forwards after there last cast members. It was not a moment to remember. The next roomy walked in and sat in the chair. All you could see, was platinum blonde hair, and orange colored skin, and sunglasses.
"You know, this is getting in the way of my tanning time. Can we make it fast?" snapped Legolas, glancing at the producers for only a moment before returning to looking over his nails.
"Err yes of course, just, say whatever you feel like saying, about anyone in this house." replied the head executive performing the palm to head.
"OH? Why didn't anyone say so!" Legolas jumped upright and removed his sunglasses, and stared straight into the camera. "You know that Arwen girl? Yeah well, talk about daddy's girl! Last week she threatened the overhead voice saying her dad would fire him if he interrupted her beauty sleep anymore. I was all like, Hun, it'll take more than beauty sleep to fix you're mess. She just flipped out, I got it on camera too, I watch it every night before bed so I can laugh a little. She's such a slob too! I mean..."
Twenty minutes later.
"And yesterday, she tried to throw ice cream on me, but ended up hitting Ara-"
"Is she ALL that you're going to talk about?" snarled the executive rubbing his temples from the constant chatter/gossip.
"Oh, no." replied Legolas looking abashed.
"Then, kindly, CHANGE THE SUBJECT!"
"Fine, don't be so moody. Now on to Aragorn, oh my he is gorgeous! And I know he likes me better than Arwen, which leads me back to how much she hates me because of this-
"GET OUT!"
"Alright, alright." Legolas grabbed his sunglasses, slammed them back on his face sent a glare at the producers and marched out of the room, allowing Eowyn to waltz in after him.
Eowyn.
"Now, do you know what we're doing here?"
"Of course, what do you take me for? An elf?" she replied, her faces as cloudy as usual.
"Oh, so you don't like the elves?" Finally they were getting something on a different note, prejudice.
"I never said that."
"Btu you, I, they, you said-"
"I said I wasn't one, I didn't mean whether I liked them or not."
"Alright then, moving on. What do you think about Aragorn?"
"He's interesting, for a human."
"But aren't you human?"
"Or course." she merely flicked her eyes over the crew members, who were growing constantly more frustrated.
"Welll, why did you say that like he was inferior."
"I never said that either. If you're going to interpret my words against what I said, then I'm leaving. I have meditating to do anyways." Eowyn stood, and waltzed out.
"I've never met a cast as dumb as this one boss." The executive knocked the camera man over.
Pippin.
"What up homies!" yelled Pippin circling the room trying to do his dumb handshake with all the camera/sound men, he came to the executive who stared at his hand like it was going to spontaneously combust. Pippin withdrew his hand rather quickly. 'Word, so do I just get to lay off a load on tha camera?"
"Word." replied the camera man nearest him, he received a kick in the back of the head, courtesy of the executive.
"Sweet. Right well, that shawty Arwen, man she's a ten for real!" he held up his two hands and made a perverted face at the camera. "But she's a bit of a diva ya dig? I mean, she can't stand Legolas because he likes Aragorn, who pays more attention to Legolas than Arwen. Hell he pays mo attention to Eowyn who's a weird psychic mamajama." Sweatdrop, who even says that word anymore? "Right which leads me to Eowyn, she's a dime piece too, but a little on the airy side. Still cute though. Next, Merry's a bit of a freak with his Lysol can o whateva. But it's word. Gimli, I've never really talked with tha man, sure he's cool. Leoglas, he's a flama, whateva though, it's cool, he's cool too. We play a lot of pranks on Arwen togetha. Sam, whata nerd, Aragorn's way cool though, way cool. Yeah, Frodo's a mess, neva seen such a lonah, but it's gravy. I'ma piece now. Pippin out." He jumped form the chair flashed a piece sign, and left.
"I think, that was the most normal one we've gotten, ever." The executive slid down the wall with his eyes closed.
Merry.
"So where is this Merry character?" questioned one of the sound men leaning against his mike.
"I'm not sure..."
"Oh yeah, here's a note from Pippin saying something about Merry." stated another digging in his pocket. The executive snatched it out of his hand and cuffed him in the back of the head.
"When were you planning on giving it to me?"
'Er..."
"Dumb ass." The executive's face grew steadily redder the longer he read the letter. "Turns out, Merry's a no show, something about too many germs in this room. So lets go to the last one. Gimli."
Gimli.
The dwarf came waddling in, and took three minutes just to get into the chair. Finally he turned to the camera, and sat there.
"Right, so, what do I do now?" Simultaneous palm-head action.
"Just say your feelings about your castmates. That's all." replied the executive shaking his head trying to control his composure.
"Right err, I don't like humans, I don't like hobbits ,and I definitely don't like elves. What else?"
"Ah, that's fine, just leave now." The executive proceeded to whack his head against the wall while Gimli waddled back out of the room. What an interesting cast.
Author's Note: So there you go, the end of the confessions, for now! Mwuahaha...right. I know it's kinda short but it's supposed to be! So until next time, HAPPY LATE TURKEY DAY!