All I Want Is Everything

by We're A Two Shot

After dinner at Breadstix, Santana and Brittany head back to Puck's place where things quickly spiral out of control, forcing Santana to acknowledge this insistent pull towards her best friend is more than just physical. How will she come to terms with it? Follows Santana in Season 2 for the most part completely canon. A more fleshed out sense of how Brittana came to be.

6. If I Wanted To Cuddle I'd Buy A Teddy

Author's Note: This chapter felt long as hell when I wrote it mainly because another part is supposed to go along with this but I ended up cutting it at where I left it here for now. So technically, the next chapter is already half written so that means it'll be faster to update, yes? Anyways, in this chapter I wanted to focus a little on the changes of Brittany and Santana's relationship through their years with a little flashback. A significant flashback for Santana I suppose. (There is some adult things in this chapter but I honestly couldn't bother with smut for Santana's bit because well...it wasn't Brittany so yeah. You get me). Anyway this chapter expresses Santana's feelings toward Brittany and how their relationship with each other has changed since they started their sweet lady kisses. I feel like as I'm writing this story there are many types of Santana to be displayed (there's the bitchy one, the sweet one, the horny one, the manipulative one, etc) which is fun to write because when I write Santana I like to try and relate to everything she is going through to better understand her. Enough ranting about it lets read it. Also, I want to thank allll of you wonderful people for reviewing this story! Your reviews are encouraging and really nice to see. And thanks for alerting this story and following. Keep up the support guys. Enjoy.

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Chapter 6. If I Wanted To Cuddle I'd Buy A Teddy Bear

I was at the mercy of a siren. Her legs seemed to elongate further than I'd ever seen before. She was featherlight on her feet, so weightless she could have floated away. Her hips swayed as throbbing beats of music coursed through her frame. Her arms bent and grasped the air with a lullaby on her fingertips. Every inch of her was a song. From the top of her head down to the soles of her feet; she was so free. Her body was acutely connected to the rhythm of all sound. She manipulated and molded that body into another instrument used to harmonize like music itself. It was the most beautiful thing in existence.

And then there was Mike Chang. He came scampering onto the stage with an unusual grace and slid to his knees, at her feet. He groveled there in a showmanship act of pure adoration. I don't think he was alone on that. Brittany—playing her role—peered down at him through sensually long lashes. She looked so authoritative and sexy. She had him chasing her on that stage. He fumbled after her with conviction. With that lost puppy dog look in his eyes, I half expected the Asian to start dry humping her leg out of sheer desperation. My God she knew how to move. Without much effort, her hips had put me in a trance. Her movements were hypnotically deliberate and so, so persuading. It was taking everything in me not to hop onto that stage, rip her off to the side and just fucking ravage her behind the curtains. That would be my death. That is how Brittany—the siren—would end me.

This connection we were witnessing, between two halves of rhythm itself, was not happening on a Broadway stage, but in the auditorium of Mckinley. Our best choreographers, Brittany and Mike, had been in the process of coaching us on our couple dancing for the Hummel/Hudson wedding—more emphasis on Quinn and Sam's routine than Rachel and Finn's. Rehearsal was nearing a close and the two dancer's were given the okay from Mr. Shuester to let loose on stage. Puck and I had practically zero responsibility (dance wise) at this wedding. I'm pretty sure Brittany managed that on purpose—I really wasn't feeling the whole dancing down the aisle bit; neither was Puckerman. But in celebration of the restoration of our friendship, Brittany made sure to include a short ribbon dancing sequence between the two of us. Things were great there, really, but since making up with her, it appears we're also mourning the loss of any possible action under the sheets. Despite the occasional kiss on the cheek, or the ear, or where ever she felt like kissing me, Brittany's affections were limited. I knew why and I made sure to send my evilest glower in Quinn and Artie's direction. Quinn for simply talking too much and not staying in her own fucking business; Artie for just...being Artie. They were straining our relationship and watching Brittany on that stage, dancing like that, made it even more difficult to behave myself. This was a battle of my willpower and how badly I didn't want to manipulate Britt. I hated having to do that. Brittany wasn't some stupid boy I could twist around my finger whenever I felt the need. I wanted her to come willingly; it was so much hotter.

I did know a warm body replacement for the time being though. But it just so happened that he got drunk in my car and wound up spurting a bunch of shit about me kissing my best friend like she had a penis and how I may have possibly loved it. I wouldn't say that I had been avoiding Puck, it was more along the lines of finding anything and everything more interesting than talking to him. Okay so I was avoiding him. Fortunately today, Puck and I had a tongue date behind the bleachers after this rehearsal. He texted me first. I couldn't help but ask him if he was doing better and he replied with "better how?". I'm still going to assume he's forgotten all about that talk in my car. He better have.

For just a second I managed to peel my eyes off of Brittany to survey the crowd in the auditorium. Kurt and Mercedes were sitting close by, marveling at Brittany's legs and how strong they were—bet they wish they hadn't quit the Cheerios so soon. I saw Finn sitting in my row with The Creature. I willed him to look to his left and after some time he did. I caught his eye almost instantly and smiled cunningly back at him. I watched him gulp in a breath and wave a hand awkwardly at me. Berry peered over his shoulder to see what he was looking at and I prepared a scowl for her. On the down low, I was in the middle of destroying that poor excuse for a relationship. Berry was going to pay for how she spoke to me in the rehearsal room. Speaking of that, her little plan actually worked. My eyes flitted over to Sam and Quinn who were on the far right end, one row down. Sam's eye had turned from a deep purple to a jaundice color in a matter of days after Karofsky punched him so hard in the locker room. A few weeks had passed since the altercation and I've got to say the act of heroism was so underwhelming without Finn there to be the main character in the story; after all he was Kurt's brother to be. The part that really tickled me though was when they described how Karofsky had shoved Mike Chang into Artie, tipping over his wheelchair. The image of that just thrilled me; well until I saw Brittany that day in Glee club, rubbing his back like an infant on the verge of burping. Fucking sickening.

I've learned to keep all of my hatred bottled up for Saddle Shoes when I'm around Britt. I really don't want to make her feel worse than she usually does when I bring up their bane of existence. She seems happy enough with her decision to date Artie. God knows I will never understand why but there's something there. To be honest, it's like a fresh paper cut every time she says something remotely positive about him. After a while I just asked her to stop all together. She understood, at first, but under the condition that I couldn't talk about Puckerman either. I tried to explain that there was a plausible difference: Puck and I weren't dating each other. She wrestled me down about this for some time and I had to remind her of our favorite slogan: sex is not dating. I won the argument pretty quickly. She remembers what it was and still is like for us. We hang by a loose thread when it comes to sex. If you started fucking before you claim to be casually seeing each other, it's not really dating. Brittany likes to argue that she and Artie are still legit because she asked him out a day or two before sex. I guess that would rule Puck and I out. We hardly ever participated in those proper dates where we were expected to go places; unless you count the trips to the local Walgreen's to get condoms. I drove, he bought. Conventional relationship I'll say.

A miniscule part of me was disappointed in Britt. We ran through our high school career without the need for a boyfriend. We could have any guy we wanted. There was never a moment when we had to struggle to hold a clever conversation with them, or worry about who would pick up the bill; that was all irrelevant. Brittany was now doing everything we were against: compromising. My father, Emilio Lopez, taught me never to compromise. In my younger years, he would insist that I should only compromise when it was completely in my favor. When I often challenged him with the information that compromising was never completely in one's favor, he would smile and claim that was his entire point; never compromise. I passed this along to Brittany. At first, I had to explain what compromising was and how mutually promising anything stopped you from getting everything you wanted. Promises were too binding. In all honesty, I just didn't want her making me promise her anything. I did promise her one thing though. We shook with our pinkies on this promise back in freshman year.

"Are you sure about this San?" A 14 year old Brittany asked me from across the couch. There was hesitation in her voice and uncertainty in her eyes.

"You need to relax," I told her with a sharp tongue."We're at Alec Porter's house. One of the hottest seniors in his class. Act mature and don't embarrass me here, Britt."

I could tell I had wounded her with my plea. In all actuality I didn't want to embarrass myself. Alec was a renowned hockey star at Mckinley. When he invited Britt and I over to test out his parent's newly installed hot tub, I jumped at the opportunity. As fresh Cheerios we were still trying to prove our worth. Our captains were undeniably attractive and so very popular; I wanted that too. With Britt in tow, I was climbing the social ladder fast. I made myself known at house parties and often made out with older boys to show just how fun I could be. Alec recognized that fun.

Now here I was in his living room with a can of beer in my hands. I eagerly accepted the alcohol he provided mainly because I was actually nervous for once. I was used to being in a crowd where I didn't have to try too hard. I was thankful that Brittany had come along because she was the closest thing I had to that. I was gulping down my second disgusting beer of the night; I needed a boost of confidence. I didn't want to appear boring. Alcohol always helped, it did all the work.

Alec sauntered back into the living room from the patio area with a crooked smile. Tadd Hanson, a hockey teammate of Alec's, followed closely behind. They had been outside, getting the hot tub ready. It looked like we were up.

"It's all ours ladies," Alec declared, still wearing that cocky grin on his beautifully angled face. His hair, which came down a little past his emerald eyes, was a dirty blonde. He always looked unusually tan in the winter, despite never going to a salon. His teeth were naturally straight with two cute canines on either sides of his top row. Out of all the hockey players at Mckinley, I liked him the most. Hockey was in, the football players would have their time later in the season.

Outside, the air was chilly. I set my can of beer down by the ledge of the hot tub and noticed a new six pack had been brought out. My legs wobbled as I stripped down to my bikini, struggling to balance with the alcohol brewing inside of me. I watched Brittany out of the corner of my eye undress. She was wearing the lavender colored bikini I had bought her last summer as a birthday gift. For some reason that made me smile.

We sank into the frothing water at the same time, dispelling a long, content sigh from our lips. The boys were watching with intrigue. My breasts were still quite small but my face had matured greatly over the past few months which earned me numerous double takes. Brittany had grown a lot taller over the summer and she often appeared older than she looked. These things worked in our favor. Besides Quinn Fabray, we were two of the hottest freshmen on the Cheerios squad.

On any other occasion, the water would have been too hot, but with the winter air whipping at my face and chest, the heat was welcomed. I separated from Britt, floating over to Alec, who was running a wet hand through his hair. When Brittany didn't budge, Tadd swam over to her side and snuck an arm behind her. The dark haired boy reached around him to pull the six pack of beer closer and pulled a can out for Brittany, handing it to her politely. I watched my best friend open the beer with a pop and sip it self consciously. I caught her eye before taking a healthy swallow of my own beer and kinked an eyebrow at her to insinuate she should relax. Understanding my method of communication, Brittany drank a little faster. I smiled approvingly at her.

Before I could start speculating how things were going to go tonight, Alec was pulling me into his lap. Our bodies flush together with an intense warmth due to the temperature of the water. My legs dangled off to the side and my head was growing light from all the beer I had consumed. Without even thinking about it, I leaned into Alec and placed a kiss on his neck. My lips tingled against his burning skin. He touched my bare, lower back in response and cradled me in his arms. I liked his arms. They were long and the skin was taut from the muscles that rippled through them. I liked the contact he was giving me and so I wrapped my own arms around his body. I peppered his skin with kisses now, my inhibitions were dwindling away. I pressed my body into his hungrily, I just wanted to feel him. I wanted those hands on me. I stroked his arms, chest, shorts; everything.

"Careful Al, that girl might just swallow you whole," I heard Tadd gibe from across the water.

Alec's chest rumbled with laughter. "Planning on it."

"Another?" Tadd's voice again. Not directed at me but to Brittany.

"Suure," she drawled.

I stopped to look over at the two of them. He was cracking open another beer for her. I couldn't remember what number she was on. She was floating in and out of focus to me. I could tell from the look in her eyes that it was beginning to happen to her too. Alec pinched the inside of my thigh playfully then and it drove me into a fit of unnecessarily loud giggles. I forced my voice down an octave before looking back at Alec. He smiled with his teeth before leaning down to capture my lips in a kiss. My brain was struggling to keep up with what my body was initiating. My hands were sliding into the legs of his shorts and shooting back out; teasing him. He had a good amount of hair on his thighs, another sign of his maturity. Most of the freshmen boys at Mckinley were still waiting on their balls to drop. Well, besides Noah Puckerman, who was actually supposed to be a sophomore. He should be next on my list...

Brittany's moans filtered the night air. I was sure Tadd and her were playing their own share of games. This was unbelievably normal with Brittany sitting across from me. She made this all so comfortable and safe. We could do this all the time, as a team.

Alec released my mouth after what seemed like hours. I was teetering on his lap. I laid my hands on his thighs for support but he took it as an advance, taking hold of my hands and placing them over his blatant erection. That part of his body sent a jolt through my back and straight into my brain where my thoughts were zapped back into focus. Sex. He wanted sex. He was looking at me expectantly and it scared me for a second. I didn't know where to go from here but I nodded at him anyway. He knew though. I knew he knew because as soon as I gave him that silent confirmation he was lifting me off of him and backing himself out of the hot tub. With the absence of his body, I struggled to find the strength to sit up properly without perching forward. I attempted to push myself out of the water but ended up nose diving back down. Two arms caught me before my face hit the scalding water. They were not taut or muscular but soft and skinny. Brittany's arms. She was holding me tightly with an unbreakable grasp. I braced myself against her, trying to find my footing again. Without her natural grace, Brittany clumsily swam me back to the edge of the hot tub to sit.

"I've got her," Alec told Britt before hooking one of those taut arms around my back and the other under my legs, lifting me out of the water. I instinctively wrapped my arms around his neck to avoid falling. I waved goodbye to Brittany in my silly drunken haze and watched her smile before backing up in the hot tub, straight into Tadd's chest.

Alec carried me through his house and up the stairs bridal style. This was nice! We were married! Mr. and Mrs. Lopez-Porter. That doesn't really have a ring to it but...

It didn't seem like we were married now. He plopped me down on his bed and there was nothing honeymoon sweet about it. He leaned over me to untie the knot behind the nape of my neck where my bikini top was tied. The strings dwindled down and rested against my shoulder blades. I reached behind myself to unclasp the rest of the bikini from my body, discarding it onto his bed. His comforter was a mixture of light colors with intricate designs. I circled my fingers over the patterns, marveling at how complex it all was. His voice interrupted my thoughts.

"Undress me."

I looked up at him, my eyes trailing over his chest. There was nothing to really undress. He stood completely still in the darkness of his bedroom. So still I could hear the drip, drip, drip sounds as water fell from his shorts. I perched forward too quickly and wished I hadn't because the room began to spin. I shook my head slowly, trying to break this feeling of vertigo. My hands bunched around the sides of his shorts and I pulled them down. Seeing his dick made everything so real. I decided to look up into his eyes instead and what I saw there scared me. Those eyes were unfamiliar and really dark. A clear thought pushed through the fuzziness and I remembered how old this boy was. The realization hit me fairly quick that this boy had been with a lot of girls. He began to pull off my bottoms. Watching him skillfully open a condom wrapper and unroll it with his fingers made me realize I wasn't really sure of how to please him.

Before I knew it he was trapping me in a kiss and settling between my legs. He was pressing into me and often pausing to check my face. I didn't expect him to check my face. What if it wasn't pleased enough? I should probably smile or something. No it hurts. It hurts too much to smile about it. I pinched my eyes shut to avoid his staring. His hips rolled into mine like a wave. With that tearing feeling fading, and my brain slowing down, I was able to just feel. It was as if my conscious self had floated straight out of my body and left it there. Every thrust from him, shook my head and spun the room. It made me a little nauseous after a while but I swallowed that back. If I could just get him to finish that would be it. I would have done it for the first time and he would be able to say it was great because I liked to think that I knew what I was doing. From the looks on his face, I was doing something right.

He came with a fist full of bed sheets in his hands. I felt it but he never felt me. I never felt anything as good as what he was feeling but I never let him know that. We dressed in a silence I didn't bother to break. There was really nothing to say. However, when we made our way to the door, he caught my wrist just long enough to say, "good job."

Brittany and Tadd were downstairs on the couch with two towels wrapped around them, making out against the cushions. I heard Alec behind me, clearing his throat. Brittany pushed off of Tadd and sat up.

"Santana!" She yelled from the couch. I lifted a finger to my lips to silence her. "Oops, sorry," she whispered loudly before clamping a hand over her mouth.

"Give us a ride home?" I looked expectantly at Alec.

He shrugged his shoulders at me. "Sure."

xXx

Getting a drunken Brittany to my room was much more difficult than I had anticipated, especially since I could barely hold myself up. We were a mess of legs and arms as we clutched onto each other, trekking up the stairs. Thankfully, I knew my parents weren't home which was specifically why I'd asked Alec and Tadd to drop us off here.

"I need to call Tadd," Brittany announced. "I forgot to tell him goodbye."

"We just saw him," I told her; some sense flooding back into my alcohol shrunken brain.

"Oh yeah..." Brittany said drearily.

"Let's work on getting up the stairs Britt Britt, I love you but you're one tall bitch right now," the words flowed quickly from my mouth.

Brittany giggled and pressed her face into my neck. "I'm sorry San," she breathed out against my skin. "I should be carrying you...like Alec."

I raised my eyebrows at her words but didn't stop pulling her along. I stepped on her foot accidentally which slowed us down. My arm gripped the rail firmly for support and I managed to get us all the way up. Being in the hallway made our destination seem so far away. The hall looked sort of long to me, drawn out, infinite. I knew it was the alcohol still running through my blood and I cursed myself for not grabbing some water from downstairs before we made this trip. When we stepped into my darkened room, I imagined it was a haven. The bed was so inviting and so...stable. I pulled Brittany over until we both fell down on the bed. My world didn't have to spin while I spun anymore. I didn't have to worry about falling down on my hard wood floor. The bed had me.

We just stayed like that. Just staring up at the ceiling in the dark. I didn't want to get my light, I just wanted to stay. Brittany's pinky was linking around mine, that's all the movement she could muster. I was comforted once again.

"I had fun tonight," she spoke into the blackness.

"Same," I replied simply. My tongue wasn't allowing me to make large sentences right now.

I felt the bed tilt and heard a shuffle. Her eyes were on me, I just knew it. I could feel them.

"Did you and Alec...you know."

For a second, I'd almost forgot what she had asked me; I was busy getting lost in the darkness.

"Yeah," I answered back.

She didn't speak for a long time. I think she was waiting on me; waiting on me to explain it to her.

"Did you know you were going to?" She asked me.

That was an interesting question. Did I know it was going to happen? Did he?

"I don't know Britt. I guess." I shrugged my shoulders. She felt that.

I could make out a faint outline of her nodding her head.

"I saw you making out with Tadd..." I let the sentence linger.

"Yeah," now she answered back simply so. "He's a good kisser. We did more than kiss though."

I turned my head in her direction now. That had my attention.

"Like what?"

There was an intake of air from her. She wanted to say something but stopped short. I waited for her. Waited some more.

"I kind of gave him a blow job," she admitted in a breath.

Now that was interesting.

"Where did you learn how to do that?" I asked with enough curiosity to kill every cat she'd ever had.

"HBO," she replied nonchalantly.

A laugh shook my chest and she soon joined in. I could see her smiling in spite of the darkness that surrounded us. When the laughter died down, I enveloped her entire hand in mine, my thumb stroking her knuckles.

"What was it like?"

I could see her scrunching her nose up in distaste. "It was kind of gross San. I almost threw up. Tadd seemed to enjoy it but I don't think his little guy did. Honestly, who wants to be slobbered all over? That poor tortured thing."

I laughed even harder this time. She said this all with such genuine pity that I couldn't tell if it was really her or just the alcohol. Either way I loved it. It was shaking me back into sobriety.

I forced myself to stop laughing after a good long minute. Britt squeezed my fingers in hers and I reveled in that contact. It reminded me of Alec all over again.

A cloud of awareness smothered my brain as I scooted closer to Britt and nudged my nose against hers to make sure she was still there. I backpedaled to the middle of our night when I had scolded her and told her not to embarrass me. We'd both done some pretty mature things tonight, that part was certain. But I was not as...supportive as I should have been. I was nervous tonight and for good reason. Why was I not as sensitive to Brittany's feelings? She was bound to be in the same state of turmoil as I was.

"You know I didn't mean it when I told you not to embarrass me, right?"

"No?" She asked me in surprise.

I squeezed her hand. "You could never embarrass me."

"You act differently around other people Santana," she said this as more of an observation than anything.

"How so?"

"I don't know. You just...you're so caught up with impressing people. You have to work so hard to make them love you. And look at me Santana. I love you. You didn't have to try to make that happen. It just did. You don't have to try so hard."

Her words had paralyzed me. The truth of it all was numbing. Brittany always managed to point out the pieces you were missing; it was a talent of hers. In a group of sentences she'd managed to tell me everything I needed to hear. She would continue loving me, there was nothing that would make her stop that. I had the potential to be great, I didn't need to work myself into the ground for it. And most of all, she was letting me know I was good enough.

"Just...don't change for them okay? They're not worth that. Promise me." Brittany's breath was hot against my face.

"I wont," I assured her.

"Pinky promise it," she demanded while tugging on my hand.

I looked down in the darkness, searching for our hands. "Our fingers are already entwined."

She removed her hand from mine and settled for re-hooking our pinkies.

"Now it's a promise," she concluded with a grin.

"Alright then good. Now can you please stop talking? I'm trying to prepare myself for the painful hangover I'm going to wake up to."

"I saw some pills for hangovers in the store. It's like the morning after pill for alcoholics."

"I doubt that even works."

She began nestling her body into me but stopped. "Would...you need the morning after pill?"

"No," I answered back briskly, cringing away from the possibility. "God no."

"Good. Your baby just wouldn't be as cute as ours," she said this matter of fact.

I smiled into the darkness. I'd much rather think of having Brittany's imaginary babies than Alec's right about now.

"Can we stay like this forever? Telling each other everything. Laughing. Taking care of each other."

"We already promised we wouldn't change so it's kind of set in stone."

"Good," I told her. "I'd like to keep that promise then."

"Me too."

The scent of Brittany's perfume reeled me back into the present.

"Panties for your thoughts," she said as she slid into the seat beside me.

My cheeks heated at her comment but I willed them to cool. "It's penny Britt. Penny for your thoughts."

"Why would anyone settle for pennies when they could have panties instead?" She asked this clearly bemused.

My eyes surveyed her appearance in one swift motion and I found myself thinking about her panties. Why did everything she said have to be interpreted so sexually? It was probably just because I wanted her so badly. This Brittany was much different than the girl I knew three years ago. Although she kept our promise true, she had certainly changed. This Brittany oozed the kind of sex appeal and confidence you saw in 1940s film noir where the villain is always played by a sexy vixen. She made boys like Alec Porter look like sterile puppy dogs. Sex with Brittany was so fucking personal, in your face, and so hot. Back then boys like Alec were as skilled as they came, but Brittany, she was an entirely new type of skilled. Over the two and a half years we spent having endless amounts of sex with the boys of Mckinley, Brittany had studied the seams that stitched the entire concept together. She could read your body and knew exactly when and where to go from there.

"You looked insanely hot out there," I blurted it out before I had time to mentally edit.

She smiled at me, clearly amused. That's how fucking confident she was. She knew she was attractive. She didn't have to be flustered. My how things have changed. Years ago I would have been obsessing over who was the most athletic senior; now days Brittany was a daily part of my thought process that I didn't mind being obsessed over. There were too many good reasons to be obsessed. Forget all of that no strings attached shit, when it came to your best friend, sex changed everything. It was a sharp contrast from sleeping with someone you didn't really know. I knew every inch of Brittany. Sex with her was like a branding; an official ownership of her entire core. It was not just sex. It was an offering. We'd spent our time developing an ethereal relationship that took years to construct into what were looking at now. This was certainly not something you fucked up with meaningless sex. Just saying that makes me want to die from the sappiness of it all. But this was something I had to handle with extreme care. I had her mind from the start, but having her body? That turned the intensity of our relationship up by tenfold. Whether I liked it or not, there were feelings there. I was still working on how to separate that from the equation. We'd stepped into uncharted territory now. There were land mines all over this fucking place and if I wasn't careful, I'd end up losing my friend. Of course this wasn't a legitimate relationship. There was no way in hell I'd ever consider the idea of actually being gay. This wasn't about sexual orientation anyway. It was about connecting with Brittany on an entirely new level. Needless to say though, I was still scared shit less that Artie would find this part of her and steal it away. He'd had the body but now she was willing to give him her mind. That sent a searing lick of fire up my organs. I loved her mind, equally as much as I loved her body. Artie didn't deserve her. Well, neither of us really did.

"Santana, do you want to hang out tonight?" I could tell from the tone in her voice that this was the second time she was asking me. I had spaced out again. I knew there was nothing sexual about her invitation. Hanging out tonight would most likely consist of baking things and painting each others toenails at her house. That was another thing about sleeping with your best friend; things often got so blurry that you had to analyze every word to make sure it didn't mean something else. I should have known that this was a platonic invite; anything that strayed away from our usual activities was "cheating" remember?

I opened my mouth to respond but I was soon interrupted by Christopher Reeve shouting up to Brittany from his spot near the stage. She waved at him stiffly before looking at me. For a second, I could have sworn her eyes were mirroring mine in their annoyance.

"Artie and I are getting coffee after this so I should go," she explained. I nodded. She bit her lip, still unsure of my answer. "Are you still gonna come over tonight?"

"I might, I don't know. I may have plans."

I didn't have any fucking plans. I just wasn't sure if I could handle being around her for that long without having permission to actually touch her. That was the worst part about sleeping together. The friend stuff was fulfilling but you always wanted more now that you were sure you could have it. It was like taking a trip to the candy store every day until finally, one day, the owner puts up a sign and says were closed; despite the place still functioning. Right now, all I knew was that I needed to find Puckerman fast. My sexual frustration was bubbling over into something painful ever since Brittany began to dance. If I wasn't going to get it from Brittany, he was the next best thing.

"Text me if your plans change?" She asked, pulling herself to her feet.

I didn't want to see her go. "Of course."

I watched Brittany for approximately ten seconds. She looked over her shoulder cautiously down to Artie I presume before turning back to me. My senses were bombarded by the heavenly scent of lilacs as she tilted towards me. Her hands sank into the muscles of my thighs, setting my skin ablaze. Cool lips brushed over my already burning cheeks. I couldn't resist placing my own hands on her hips to steady her and I wish I hadn't. A fire erupted in my belly and drew straight down between my legs with such heat that I had to cross them. Brittany's lips lingered for a mere second before she withdrew her hands and body from my grasp. I attempted the most platonic smile I could muster and watched her skip away down the auditorium rows, straight into Artie's arms. I exhaled a breath I hadn't even realized I'd been holding and squeezed my thighs even tighter. Where was Puckerman when you needed him?