Scout and Medic glanced up from the salty fingers they were licking.
Was that… Sniper?
"Hey, doctor—do you think zhat's Sniper? You hear zhat too, right? Of course I do, you shtupid idiot. Ve have zhe same ears. Hey! You know vhat, I'm just trying to be nice here—"
Medic suddenly jerked up from the seat into a standing position, which surprised Scout (their face seemed shocked that they were standing) and the German interrupted Scout's rambling. "It doesn't matter, Scout. If zhat is Sniper, ve need to help him. Now." They remained silent for a moment before Scout answered. "You're right. Let's go check it out."
They swerved around the table and scurried down the hallway, pivoting with quite a bit of dexterity to the stairs and bolting up them.
Over the loud rush of water in the bathroom, the fearful wails of the dog-man hit Scout and Medic's ears. The two of them nearly tripped over themselves as they rushed towards Sniper's room, contrary to their previous coordination at the bottom of the stairwell. Brushing off their fault in stride, they continued onwards, throwing open Sniper's bedroom door.
Pyro was sitting peacefully smack in the center of the doorway.
"Vhat zhe—"
"HELP!" Sniper shrieked. He was shirtless and curled up on the corner of the top bunk where it connected to the bedpost. His leash provided little room for him to move about.
"Hey! Get off my bed! Vhat are you doing!?"
Rather than spitting an insult at Scout, Sniper pointed downwards, towards the ground.
Scout and Medic peered over the obtrusive Pyro's shoulder to get a better view; there, behind the big fireproof lug, was Sniper's giant knife, twirling in the air with a freakish glow trailing about it. It was quaking violently, seemingly attempting to aim itself at the traumatized man on the bedpost.
"Oh, shit," they spat, and they spun around Pyro and into the room, standing fearfully in awe of the enchanted kukri.
"GET IT!" Sniper howled as it came zooming towards him. He flung himself off the bed and the collar pulled tightly on his neck. He wheezed in pain and grasped at his throat as he regained his balance. It was then that Scout and Medic saw the multiple slashing cuts on Sniper's sides and biceps, where blood leaked faintly out of them. Thankfully, they didn't seem to be too deep, but the fact that they existed was troubling.
The knife was now wrenching itself out of the wood in the bedpost where it had struck so violently.
"Help me," Sniper gasped, fear brightening his eyes. Medic and Scout would've looked at each other if they didn't have the same eyes.
They leaped over to the bedpost, struggling agonizingly to untie the unbelievably tight knot that Sniper's leash was in. The fact that the leash had no clip on Sniper's collar meant that the only way to get him out of it was to cut it off.
"Are you zhinking vhat I am zhinking? Of course," they grinned. Sniper looked nervous.
The kukri wrenched itself free of the furniture; splinters wafted out of the new hole and drifted to the floor. It whirled around and aimed back at the wolfish being who stood shivering in the room's center.
The knife began to rattle and shake before its terrorizing liftoff.
"Mates, I know you know what you're thinkin', but see, I 'ave no idea—"
Scout and Medic shoved Sniper aside (as far as he could go) just as the mossy-colored light soared down towards them. Their petite fingers and draping sleeves wrapped around the leash and yanked it about ninety degrees from its original position. The blazing kukri blasted through the rawhide, slicing it into two. Only a foot of leather rope was left attached to Sniper's collar at that point; he gaped at the shredded buckskin before Scout and Medic rushed to usher him out of the room while the knife remained to writhe on the floor, infuriated by its failure.
Scout, Medic and Sniper swerved around Pyro, turning about and slamming the heavy door shut before any more disaster occurred.
"Sorry, mate," Sniper mumbled to the mumbler before the door smacked closed in the gas-masked face.
Medic and Scout sighed in relief and the back of their head tapped the closed door lightly. They smiled. "Great job. I didn't know you could zhink like zhat, Scout. Yeah, vell. I can be pretty smart, sometimes."
Sniper just shook his head and sighed before slowly sinking to the floor to rest after his lacerating endeavor.