Chuck vs the Aisle of Terror
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A/N at the end!
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Ellie Woodcomb just nodded as the waiter placed the cup of herbal tea in front of her.
"She was a spy. What is it that makes my family so willing to throw their lives away for… what. Dad, Chuck, Sarah and now Mom are or were spies. Am I the only one in the family that wants a nice safe spy free life?"
She rubbed her tummy "Mom, please, give me five minutes. Please come tell me why I am so different?"
Chuck said thank you for his coffee calmly, even though he knew by watching his sister that she was silently freaking out. Chuck knew that a million things must be going around in her head. Only there were about ten million running through his right now.
"Ok, what do I know. Sarah loves me, she is trying to protect me, but Mom would never hurt me. She is my Mom; she is supposed to love me, isn't she? OK, yes granted, she shot me in the chest, and yes I've got to admit, it hurt like heck, but she had a really really good reason. Of course, Sarah did say that she was protecting my blind spot, and I know that I have a blind spot here. And she is my leggie Valkyrie that can do incredible things with those legs. But is that the point here now? Sarah and I have had some really crazy ups and downs. Can't I and my mom have the same sort of wild and crazy ride.."
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Sarah leaned back against the van wall and watched the unconscious form of the woman who will someday be her mother-in-law lying at her feet, a tranq dart in her back.
"Crap, you deserve this for what you did to Chuck." Sarah raised her pistol and shot her six times, "And this is for what you did to Ellie." And she emptied the rest of the clip.
The van came to a stop and the side door opened. Casey climbed in, holding his sniper rifle and noticed the darts had made a perfect pattern of a sad face in their prisoners butt. He looked at the the gun in Sarah's hand and grunted.
"Walker, you have issues, you know this right?" Casey slammed the door, reached in and handed her another clip.
Grabbing the clip, she reached into her pocket and pulled out a cell phone. She started scrolling down the list and put the phone to her ear.
"Hi Dad, its Sam."
"No, no I'm not. Listen can you do something for me."
"Can you tell me about Mom?"
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Shadow was looking through the stacks and stacks of information that he had at his disposal and all the while he was pressing a 'Don't Panic' button.
Finally he pulled out Dr. Fred's book, "642 Steps to Deal with a Crazy Pregnant Sister" and started looking in the index.
"Mommy-to-be has mommy issues. Ok, here we go and this number one rated book says, 'You are on your own'. Oh Crap!"
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The Adorable Psycho was still dressed in a two piece swim suit, a bullet proof wedding veil and carrying an AK-47. She looked out the eye ball shaped window at the woman on the ground.
"HA – GOT YOU. NO ONE UPSETS MY MAN WITHOUT HAVING TO DEAL WITH ME!"
She turned around and looked at the nerd temple on the wall. "As much as I love you snoodlekins, no one is taking one itty bity bit of your love but me, and that includes some bad ass mommie. Well if it's a fight she wants, Mommie, meet the main bad ass in his life. Bring it on!"
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Jeff watched as Lester joined him in the main room of the Aisle of Terror. With a nod, Jeff picked up the mic.
"Jeff, it's cued to slide 5," and Lester started the sound effects.
Jeff put the Mic to his lips and looked at the screen. "BABIES IN COSTUMES"
The slide changed and Jeff's eyes got wide. "AUGGGGGGGGG" and he ran out the door, knocking Lester over.
"Jeffrey what.. AUGGGGGGG" and he followed Jeff.
On the screen was a super cute beagle pup, with Santa hat and a smily faced cookie in its mouth. The tag on his collar read 'CASEY'
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Darkness falls across the band
The appointed hour is close at hand
Creatures crawl in search of booze
To terrorize you while you snooze
And whosoever shall be found
Witnessing the green shirts getting down
Must stand and face the Fist of Casey
Or rot inside the van of lazy
The foulest stench is in the air
The funk of forty thousand poo's
And squeaky hinges from every bathroom
Are closing in to seal the fumes
And though you fight to stay awake
Your body starts to whimper
For no mere nerd can resist
The music of THE JEFFSTER!
Wha ha ha
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A/N
Usual disclaimers apply. My apologies for the Nerd Version of Mr. Jacksons version of Thriller. It just seemed to work.
I got a review and a couple of PM's about who AP and Shadow are. For that look up Wepdiggy and Armidillo's stories. Research – yum!
As for the beagle, that's one of mine. We now know who won the cookie battle from last Christmas. :)
Thank you Jagged1 for the beta, and the peptalk. (If more good stuff is coming your way, thank her). Also the Jeffster at the end was added after the beta. So if it does not make sence, blame me.
Finally please remember to review this and anything else you read on the site.
Remember the trick for this weekend is to find time to treat yourself to a Chuck-a-thon! HAPPY HALLOWEEN!
JC