Dear Jack,

I know you probably think this is a suicide note, but it's not. Okay, maybe it is, a little, because I know I won't be coming back; but I don't want you—any of you—to think I did this because I wanted to kill myself. I don't. And this has absolutely nothing to do with you or with the nightmares, so you can get that thought out of your head right now, Jack.

I'm doing this because I believe it's the only way, and I also know that General Hammond would never order anyone to do it. If my plan works, both the power source and the Stargate will be destroyed, and I will have no way to get back home.

I know you, Jack, and I know you're already planning a rescue mission, but I want you to promise me you won't. Even if I somehow manage to survive the explosion, it would take months for anyone to reach me, and the chances of me still being alive are remote at best. I don't want you to waste valuable manpower and resources in a pointless mission to bring me home. You have more important things to worry about right now. You need to focus on a way to stop Anubis from trying this again.

I don't regret my decision. I know it's the only way to save you and countless others. My only regret is that I never got a chance to say a proper good-bye. I hope you will someday understand and forgive me,

Daniel.

Jack sat in the Briefing Room, staring at the letter in his hands. He'd already read it numerous times to himself and had just finished reading an expurgated version to General Hammond and the rest of SG-1. He'd kept the sentence about the nightmares to himself, figuring that was something Daniel meant for his eyes only. He waited in silence as the others absorbed the content of Daniel's last communication.

"He was right," said Hammond softly. "I would never have ordered anyone to do what he did."

"I still can't believe he did that," said Carter, string blankly ahead. "I can't believe he sacrificed himself again."

"He's not dead," said Jack with conviction. "If there's one thing I've learned about Daniel over the years it's that he's got more lives than a cat. Trust me—he's alive out there, and I'm going to bring him home."

Teal'c lifted a brow at Jack's lack of logic. "How is it that you can be so certain Daniel Jackson is alive?" he asked.

Jack frowned at the Jaffa in return. "Daniel's a smart guy. He said he had a plan, and I guarantee you that plan involved not getting killed," he said, his eyes blazing with determination. "Daniel's alive. I can feel it."

Sam nodded her head in agreement. It wasn't rational, but she felt the same way. She thought this must be what it was like to lose a limb; even when you know it's gone it feels like it's still there.

"Colonel, you do realise the very high probability that Dr. Jackson is dead?" asked Hammond.

"I'm well aware of the odds, sir," Jack answered. "But Daniel has been in worse situations and he always seems to pull through somehow. Dead or alive, I won't leave him out there."

General Hammond nodded, expecting no less from his second in command. "Very well, Colonel, I'm giving you a go to bring him back, but you'll have to go alone. I'll need Major Carter here to help devise a method of detecting the phase-shift bombs in case Anubis attacks again, and Bra'tac has requested Teal'c's help with the Jaffa resistance—a request I've already granted. If you do this, it'll have to be a solo mission. Understood?"

"Yes, sir. Thank-you, sir," said Jack with an even mix of relief and disappointment. It would have made him much happier if he could have his team with him, but he understood that Hammond couldn't very well send all of them off on a hopeless mission for God only knew how long, when there was an imminent threat against Earth and its allies.

"Dismissed, everyone," said Hammond.

They all pushed away from the table and went their separate ways, but Jack caught up with Carter a few minutes later as she was making her way to her lab.

"Carter, you got a minute?" asked Jack.

"Of course, sir," she answered and fell into step beside him.

"Is there any possibility at all that the 'gate on Daniel's planet…"

"P9T 337," Carter supplied automatically.

"Yeah, that one…is there any chance we can get it to work?"

Carter shook her head, her clear blue eyes solemn as she answered him. "I'm sorry, sir. Since we got the computer back on line a few hours ago we've attempted to dial the planet twelve times, each time with the same result. The last chevron won't lock—the 'gate on the other side was either destroyed in the explosion or buried in debris."

"So I'll need to get there by ship, and the Tok'ra ships are too slow to be of any use. I guess that means…Asgard."

"Asgard," Carter agreed. "If you can track them down, that is. Lately they've been pretty scarce."

"Oh, I think Thor still owes us a favour or two…or three. I say it's about time I gave the little grey fella a shout."

"Good luck, sir," said Carter. Her wide blue eyes spoke louder than her words—'I wish I could go with you'.

Jack gave her a reassuring pat on the shoulder and went off to call in a marker or two…or three.

Night time on P9T 337 fell fast, and the overcast sky allowed no starlight to get through. It was a pressing darkness, as black as any cave, and Daniel lay pinned to the ground staring up at the blackness above and wishing for a break in the cloud cover—just a tiny glimpse of the stars to remind him that he wasn't totally alone in the universe.

The rain continued to patter down on him through the overhanging branches of the nearby trees, and he was starting to forget what it was like to be dry. But at least he wasn't cold—long after the sun had set the cloying heat persisted, and Daniel had a feeling it wasn't going to cool down any time soon.

He'd spent hours trying to free himself from his bamboo restraints, but the shoots were too tall and jagged to pull himself free and too thick and strong to break. Of course it didn't help that his right arm was useless and a few ribs were broken, making the smallest movement excruciatingly painful. He cursed himself for not thinking to bring a knife.

But there was no sense beating himself up about it now. No need to, really, since the planet was intent on doing that for him. There was nothing he could do now except try to stay alive and hope that his friends were stubborn enough to come after him.

As Daniel lay there fighting bleak thoughts, he heard a thumping sound a few feet away in the pitch black. He craned his neck in the direction of the sound and strained his eyes against the oppressive darkness, but he couldn't see a thing. He listened intently for any other sounds, but all he could hear, apart from the pounding of his own heart, was the wind howling through the trees. If it was an animal, then it was an extremely quiet and patient one.

A strong gust of wind rustled the trees overhead, and there were two more thumps—one coming from directly at his feet. Adrenalin coursed through his veins, but it wouldn't do him much good—in his current condition there was no way he could possibly fight or flee. Whatever they were, he was completely at their mercy.

Another thump, farther away this time, and Daniel was starting to think that he was safe…whatever this was, it wasn't an attack. And then something hit him hard in the chest.

Daniel gasped at the blinding pain in his ribs, and his left hand flew to his chest in an attempt to ward off any further attack. His hand encountered a round, sort of fuzzy-feeling thing rolling down his chest towards his groin, and in a moment of panic he forgot about the bamboo shoots and tried to kick himself away from it. Searing pain shot through his upper thigh as the move caused the bamboo to rip his leg wound open even further.

The baseball sized object rolled to a stop in the hollow of his pelvis and rocked slightly with the rise and fall of his breathing. It wasn't moving under its own power, he realized. It wasn't alive.

With reason slowly returning, Daniel slowly reached his hand down to touch it and received no adverse reaction from it. Emboldened now, he carefully picked it up, examining its weight, texture and shape with adept fingers. Its surface was fuzzy and there was a distinct cleft and dimple in the sphere. Applying some pressure, he found he was easily able to dent it.

It was a fruit! The wind in the tree branches overhead had knocked loose some fruit and it was landing in his little patch of bamboo. Daniel had to laugh at himself for getting so riled up over nothing.

It was the first bit of good fortune he'd had since the explosion. He'd brought a few power bars with him, but they wouldn't last him for long; so if the fruit was edible and if he was able to reach enough of it, he might have a viable food source, abundant enough to keep him alive until help arrived.

As a few more fruit thumped to the ground around him, Daniel finally allowed his exhaustion to claim him and he drifted off into a fitful sleep.

It was touch and go for a while, but Jack was finally able to secure Thor's help in hunting down Daniel. Thor was more than willing to lend a hand, but he'd let Jack know that he was in the middle of some tricky negotiations that required the Supreme Commander's attention. It would be another eighteen hours at the earliest before Thor could get away from his duties and swing by Earth to pick him up. From there, Thor estimated it would take just over eight days to reach P9T 337, pushing the engines all the way.

Nine days total.

If Daniel was still alive and well, he might be able to hold on that long, but if he was hurt, or if the environment on the planet was hostile, then nine days might as well be nine hundred. Jack wanted to tell Thor to screw the negotiations and get his skinny grey ass over here this minute, but he knew Thor was doing his best.

As much as he hated it, there was nothing he could do but wait. And pray.

In the grey light of dawn, Daniel Jackson awoke from a nightmare—the one in which a Goa'uld-infested Jack had sent them both hurtling off the cavern's ledge to the dark abyss below. Only this time, when he woke up, it was to the stark realization that his nightmare had come true in every way.

He'd ruined everything.

And as punishment he'd been consigned to a watery grave. Granted, not the churning ocean depths of his dream, but close…and far worse. He'd have much preferred the quick end promised to him in the nightmare, rather than this slow, torturous death, drenched in a ceaseless drizzle and unutterably alone on a distant planet.

What little sleep he'd gotten had been interspersed with waking moments racked with pain. What made it infinitely worse was that it was impossible for him to shift into a more comfortable position. The parts of him that weren't already bruised, broken or bleeding now ached with the need to move and stretch. He needed to take his mind off his discomfort. He needed to do something.

"So…what's on the agenda for today?" he voiced aloud to himself, and was surprised when he heard a reply in the form of a loud squawk coming from a huge, inky-black bird circling overhead. Its golden eyes kept him in sight as its spiralling descent brought it closer and closer until it finally broke through the tree cover.

Daniel's only coherent thought as the bird swooped down towards him was that those powerful-looking talons would soon put him out of his misery. He braced himself; eyes clenched shut, waiting to feel the sharp claws tear into his defenceless body, but all he felt was the fanning wind from the creature's great wings as it landed a short distance from his head. Daniel risked cracking an eye open and saw the bird hopping closer, its cold, reptilian gaze regarding him cautiously.

A few hops later, the bird must have decided Daniel wasn't much of a threat and it squawked out a long string of birdsong before latching its claws onto one of the fallen fruit on the ground. Daniel smiled, thankful to find he wasn't on the menu.

Overhead, several more of the large black birds appeared, drawn by the first bird's calls. And with swift precision, the small flock descended and made quick work of clearing his little bamboo patch of the fruit. With their bounty firmly grasped in their collective talons, the birds took flight as one, disappearing into the treetops where they could eat undisturbed.

The only piece of fruit they hadn't taken was the one tucked into the crook of Daniel's elbow—the one of 'chicken little' fame. He reached for it and brought it closer to his face so he could get a better look at it. It was a dark red, and fuzzy like a peach. It seemed to have softened somewhat overnight, and it dented easily under the pressure of his fingertips. He sniffed at it curiously; it smelled sweet, and his stomach rumbled in anticipation.

If the birds were eating it, then chances were pretty good they weren't poisonous, but there was no way of knowing for sure if it was safe for human consumption. Daniel thought about it for a moment. He only had three power bars, and an indefinite amount of time until he was rescued, if he was rescued at all. He would have to resort to eating the fruit eventually, he reasoned. He had no idea how much more fruit might land near enough for him to gather, and judging by the rapid ripening of the one he'd held onto, he had a feeling this was a limited time offer.

His mind made up, Daniel bit into the fruit. It was tart and sweet all at once, like a plum, and it was really juicy. Not bad at all, he thought, as he swallowed the first bite. When he didn't start convulsing and foaming at the mouth, he took it as a sign that it was okay to have another bite. He ate slowly, savouring every mouthful, and spat the pit out, watching the black stone arc in the air and land near the foot of the closest tree. Good shot, he thought, and grinned at his spectacular pit-spitting abilities.

It was probably his imagination, but he thought he was starting to feel a little better. Several more minutes passed and Daniel knew it wasn't just his imagination—he did feel better…a whole lot better, actually. The pain that had been a continuous presence since his tumble down the ravine had lessened considerably. It was still there, but what had once been an ear-splitting din was now little more than a nagging hum.

Daniel's eyelids slid shut, as he basked in the cessation of his discomfort and wondered how long it would last. He decided to take advantage of the situation and get some much needed sleep.

Back at the Cheyenne Mountain Complex, Jack O'Neill was alone in the darkened Briefing Room staring down into the empty Gate Room. It was the middle of the night, and everything looked so peaceful—there were no incoming wormholes, no teams heading off-world, no Goa'uld invasions…hell, there wasn't even any routine maintenance going on.

And it was really starting to piss him off. As far as he was concerned, this place should be bustling with people working overtime to get Daniel back. Whatever happened to 'rallying the troops'? For that matter, whatever happened to 'leave no man behind'?

Jack flipped open his watch and was dismayed to find that only five minutes had passed since the last time he'd checked. So much time on his hands…so little to do. Jack leaned his forehead against the cool, bullet-proof glass of the observation window and closed his eyes. With no other distractions, the memories he'd been fighting to suppress bobbed unbidden to the surface, demanding to be acknowledged.

He was back in the caverns on PX9 292. Jack had spent the entire day watching Daniel lose himself in what he claimed was one of the most important archaeological finds ever. It looked like nothing more than a bunch of cave paintings and broken bones to Jack, but Daniel was convinced he might have found hard physical evidence of the Missing Link.

Whatever.

All it meant to Jack was that it would be a long time before they would be able to drag their ecstatic archaeologist away from his discovery. Carter and Teal'c had abandoned him early on to do some spelunking, under the flimsy guise of collecting mineral samples for study. And that left Jack with nothing to do all day except watch Daniel play with his new toys.

Daniel's hyper, rambling account of the pre-historic people who once inhabited the caverns quickly became a droning background noise to Jack—something he nodded at occasionally whenever Daniel's crystal-blue eyes turned to him expectantly. His mind wandered as his eyes tracked his friend's progress from one new find to another, watching his long, inquisitive fingers fan across cave drawings as if their texture alone could unlock the secrets of the past. He watched as Daniel got so caught up in his work that he forgot he had an audience; his lips still moving despite the fact that he'd stopped talking aloud a long time ago.

Jack smiled—he loved it when Daniel did that, and it had been far too long since he'd seen this side of his friend. Years spent fighting the Goa'uld and doing whatever was necessary to survive had changed him. Daniel was a seasoned soldier now, as strong and as confident in battle as anyone Jack had ever worked with, but it had come at a price. Daniel had adapted. His passion for peaceful resolution had mellowed in him to become just another tool in his arsenal. And what's more, the man just seemed…tired. He'd seen too much and suffered more than any man should ever have to.

So it was with a certain amount of gladness that Jack watched the younger man return to his natural element, as absorbed and excited about this discovery as he had been about uncovering the purpose of the Stargate eight years earlier.

The day passed far more quickly than he'd expected, and soon Teal'c and Carter were back and setting up camp for the night. Jack was about to call out to Daniel to let him know it was dinner time, thinking he'd have to pry his fingers off the cave wall to get him to come, when he noticed the other man was no longer working.

Daniel was standing near the lip of the cavern, staring out at the ocean. As Jack approached, he found himself captivated by the way the warm light of the sunset made Daniel's youthful features glow. He looked…radiant. He looked happy. Jack felt an entirely different kind of glow come over him as he realized that he, too, was happy. Happier than he had been in years.

"Have you ever seen anything so beautiful?" asked Daniel.

Without missing a beat, Jack answered truthfully; "Can't say I have." The words, and the feelings behind them shocked Jack out of his reverie and he snapped his eyes forward in embarrassment, but not soon enough to avoid the curious glance of his friend.

He'd thought he'd recovered from the slip nicely, leaving Daniel none the wiser. But clearly he'd been wrong. Daniel had caught his slip up and it had burrowed its way into Daniel's subconscious, manifesting itself in the other man's nightmares. And no wonder! If it confused the hell out of Jack, he couldn't imagine how Daniel must have felt. Talk about your mixed signals! Jack had no idea what had made him so blatantly flirt with the other man, but he'd been naïve to think that Daniel hadn't noticed.

Jack had tried to pretend it had never happened; had completely convinced himself that it had just been some weird trick of the light, that he'd been caught up in the moment…that it had meant nothing. And yet afterwards, he'd done everything in his power to avoid Daniel whenever possible and to keep him at a distance whenever they had to be in the same room. Whatever was necessary to block the whole incident from his mind.

When it came right down to it, this whole mess was Jack's fault, and he'd be damned if he was going to let Daniel pay for his stupid mistake.

Jack sighed and rubbed his hands over his face, trying to banish the guilty thoughts from his mind. He checked his watch again. Only three minutes had passed.

"Dammit! Hurry up, Thor!" he muttered.

As if on cue, Jack was enveloped in a sparkling white light and beamed away.