Apparently I like ripping my own soul out...but I am really proud of how this one turned out. ...*ugly sobbing*

Even the Devil Was Once an Angel

~Prompt 3, Part 2: Broken (Hearted)~
.:The True Code Blue:.

There again would never be a man as loved as Gray Fullbuster…for the majority of all that pure unconditional love towards him came from one person, and one person alone, and her existence and consciousness was slowly fading away.

She kept him in her mind even during what she knew would be her last fleeting moments, as she wanted those moments to be filled with nothing but happy times, and she was never happier than when she was within his presence.

Yes, never, ever happier.

"Wh…what's happening?! Why does she suddenly look like that?!"

"I think there's something wrong with her heart…!"

"Juvia, Juvia…! Are you all right?!"

"Don't shake her like that, Natsu!"

"Sorry! Sorry…"

From the moment they met, Juvia knew she had found something amazing within Gray. Even as they challenged each other at the top of a rain-soaked building that fateful day, the conviction in his voice as he stood against her was a window to the complex yet wonderfully simple soul within. Just by the way he moved and spoke, she could tell he was one that had closed up his emotions…but even so, he still cared about her more in their fleeting encounter than anyone ever had before. He looked past the rain and saw her for the girl she could be, reaching through the gloom to take her hand, and save her life in more ways than one.

Yes, he brought the light into her life, and she owed him so much for that.

"She's so still…she's so still…"

"M-Maybe…a fish will help? F-Fish…like water, after all…"

"My magic isn't working…it's not…I can't…aaah…AAAAAAH!"

"Wendy, dear child-!"

She was hopelessly enraptured with the boy, and to someone on the outside looking in, she would be readily dismissed as a psychotic stalker. But that wasn't entirely it- she so desperately wanted to get close to him, but after their rocky battle and bewildering first impressions, she wanted to know more about him without unintentionally putting him off.

Gosh, it was like following a unicorn- finding something so rare and majestic walking amongst his mundane companions. Gray himself was rather average, but all it took was one noteworthy difference to set him apart from the rest and make him seem like magic, and there were plenty of things she could list about him. He was so creative and passionate, he was really easy on the eyes, and while he was admirably tough and refused to take anything flak from anyone, he was still sensitive, and still cared about his guild above all else.

Yes, that was someone Juvia wanted in her life very much.

"We have to find help immediately!"

"There's not enough time, Erza!"

"We can't just stand here either…!"

When she finally got the strength to approach him during his mini vacation at that ritzy resort, her nerves couldn't have been more shot. She sported a large gold charm to showcase her planned dedication to Fairy Tail, which he approved of, and even earned her a rare warm smile. It was the most delightful thing she'd ever seen in her life…and that one was just for her.

She thought a friendship was building between her and his team when she helped them infiltrate the Tower of Heaven, as she definitely earned respect from Natsu and friendship from Lucy that could never be replaced. She was still unable to spit out her spontaneous love for Gray, but even with his biting offhanded remarks at her and his blatant disinterest in her romantically, he still saw her as someone that was worth protecting, and someone who he wouldn't mind calling a comrade.

Yes, for the moment that was enough.

"Is…is she crying?! Juvia…!"

"I…I can only imagine the pain she's in…and there's nothing we can do…!"

"But…she's smiling too…"

She had learned so many things from him during her acceptance into Fairy Tail- how to laugh at the smallest things, how to properly eat certain sandwiches, how to enjoy each and every day for what it was… He was even the one to initially approach her with the idea for their Fantasia Parade Float, which turned out just so beautiful and like something straight out of a fairy tale…for the first time, she felt like she truly belonged, and it was Gray who helped give her that…

She wasn't used to being around someone she cared about so deeply for this long, as normally they all would have fled at the sight of her rain…but Gray was pleasantly different. Not only had he chased away the rain, but he accepted her, and she didn't know what to do…but apparently her approaches were a little too strong…

Yes, but she hadn't done it on purpose…she was just afraid that if she didn't try hard enough, she'd lose him…

"H-hey…what's that she's gripping so tightly in her hand…?"

She'd do anything for him, even die…as he was willing to do the same for her, even if it wasn't out of the sort of love that needed to be reciprocated to be meaningful. She prevented his death at the hands of Meredy, and he in turn rescued her from the once vengeful daughter of his master…but if she had to pick her death, she'd much rather do it alongside him…like back on Tenrou, when doom was imminent and he had wordlessly taken her hand, everything being said with the simple action alone. She returned his sentiments with a little squeeze, just before all was bathed in a brilliant light…

Yes, back then, she could have honestly died contently.

"In her hand…is that…?"

"Yeah…it looks like Gray's necklace…"

"Lucy, why are you grabbing her hand-?"

"I just…I want to give her some comfort somehow. She's suffering and we can't do a thing about it!"

Not even seven years could wane away her dedicated love, nor did the time displacement blemish any of Gray's best features. Neither of them had aged a day, and their personalities were still as vibrant and pristine as they day they'd disappeared, and it didn't take long to get back into the swing of things. Gray had been a little disturbed at missing out on so much time, but Juvia had been there for him, reminding him that there still was a life to live…even if Lyon had suddenly insisted on intervening.

But yes, it was somewhat amusing watching Gray get flustered over it, whatever his reasons for it may have been.

"Guys…is it giving up…if we've done all we can? There's no way…"

"Don't talk like that, Wendy! There's still gotta be something-!"

"Natsu, stop! Don't…don't make to worse…"

After toughing through the struggle of the Grand Magic Games, getting the chance to feel his firm hand interlocked with her delicate one…after surviving an attack of dragons brought forth from a long forgotten past…after making it out of that wearisome ordeal alive, she thought that maybe there had been a chance…but still he rejected her, and even Lyon had firmly backed off. Gray made it clear he wasn't romantically interested…but ever since then, he'd been a little more open-minded when it came to her advances. She would never give up.

Yes, she believed that there was still hope.

"How can you stand seeing her suffer like this?!"

"You fool, no one WANTS to this happen…!"

"But she definitively doesn't deserve to be alone while she…she…"

"Yes. We will stay by her side until the end."

"…we're not going anywhere this time…"

But nothing rocked her to the core quite like running into the man who was Gray's father- the man who was half the reason that Gray was able to walk this world; half the reason this life had been more bearable… she respected the man so much for that alone that she claimed him as her own father- an idea he was happy to roll with. Knowing that the father of her beloved believed in the two of them gave her unmatched strength…but when it came down to it, she had to kill him, and she was more than ready to cut off ties with Gray because of it. For anyone else, that would have been unforgivable…

And yet, Gray had not only forgiven her, but thanked her for relieving his father of an inescapable fate. He forgave and thanked her for…doing something so unspeakably horrible…

Love or not, that was a level of kindness even Juvia herself was unsure that she'd ever be able to match.

"Gads, she's trembling so violently…!"

"Wh-why is she jerking like that?! Someone stop her!"

"Get a potion, get something-!"

"Oh, Juvia-!"

"SHIT!"

Her life, as a matter of fact, had not revolved solely around Gray. It had been more about her quest to become a better person…she just owed a LOT of that accomplishment to Gray himself. Living with him had been the finest six months of her life, and it wasn't because she was finally seeing her dreams become a reality, and she was at long last living her sought out simplest daydreams.

No, it was because slowly, day by day and sluggishly but surely, Gray had finally started opening up. He was deeply tormented by the loss of Silver, and she made sure to give him space and give him comfort at all the right times. She never imposed more than necessary, but when he finally came to accept what had happened…he was so, so much happier. He was so much more relaxed and much more open with how felt, and all without losing that charm that made him who he was.

And she had brought out that part of him, once buried deep under every icy emotional layer of turmoil, all by herself. And that's what made her most proud- she had defrosted his frozen heart, and maybe, just maybe, it had thawed enough to let him finally return the love she herself harbored so persistently.

"I…I…"

"J-Juvia?!"

"She's gone limp-"

"But I heard her! I heard her!"

He shouldn't have left her, shouldn't have let those marks corrupt his body whether he had control or not, shouldn't have kept her in the dark…! He should have told her something was wrong, or that he had a dangerous mission to go on…she would have understood if she couldn't come! Didn't he trust her with the secret, or did he think she was too weak to fend for herself? What had she done to warrant such an opinion from him? She didn't care where he went or why anymore…she just would have liked to know why she'd been completely left out of the equation.

She'd never forget when he'd slowly take longer and longer on his solo missions…when he slowly told her less and less each time he came home…when he refused to talk to her at all…

When he left without any warning. Without a goodbye.

"Juvia loves you all…Juvia loves all of Fairy Tail…"

It was true she was mad at him, and even she couldn't blindly hand wave his actions without him knowing just how much he hurt her. She would replay the anticipated scene of their reunion in her head over and over again every time before she fell asleep each night, internally baking with feverish heat. She knew she would run straight into his arms upon his return, sobbing with uncontrollable relief at seeing him alive and well. He would stand there, feeling bad for making her worry like that…then she wouldn't speak to him at all, returning the silent treatment he'd so readily imposed on her before his departure…

"…and that still…"

And only then would he realize how deep his actions cut through her very soul, and he would tremble where he stood, not even sure where to begin to beg for forgiveness. …but the words would come to him –they always did- and with tears welling at his own eyes, he would quietly apologize for bringing back the rain.

"…includes Gray-sama…"

And yes, she would forgive him for his otherwise deplorable folly, just as he forgave her for killing his father. She would be able to at last repay a deep debt she kept close to her heart; something she'd not even told Gray about.

"J-Juvia?!"

"She…the necklace fell-! Her eyes-!"

But whether her heart had simply snapped in two, or had broken into a million and one fragments, or burst into smithereens of infinite dust…

"Juvia…wake up…JUVIAAAA!"

"Natsu-!"

"NO! NOOOOOO!"

...even if it was divided into the smallest pieces it could possibly be, every single bit of her heart would still belong to Gray Fullbuster. She had always loved him unconditionally with all her heart, no matter what he did…

"J-Juvia…she's gone…"

…from the moment they met until the very second she died.

. . .

The day he left her still insisted on haunting him, whether his bonds were broken or not. It was impossible to free his mind of the memories of what was going through his head that fateful night, for that was the last time he truly felt anything at all. Erza may have given him the nudge, and Juvia wasn't going to take it well…but this was his choice.

He was making this sacrifices for them, for him…for her…

He would honest-to-goodness be completely lying if he said the six months he spent with her were meaningless. On the contrary, they had been some of the most impactful days of his life. He ended up at the little house planning for it to only be temporary- he just needed a quick place to stay for a week or so until he got his plan of action in mind. Juvia, of course, welcomed him in with open arms, and she…she had kept her distance. It was strange- she cooked for him, picked up after him, and tended to his needs even when he insisted that she didn't need to, but at the same time, that was all she did for him. She never went above and beyond, and she never did anything less- not being smothered by her allowed him to see Juvia in a completely different light.

They could talk like normal people, train together normally, go on jobs normally…and heavens, it was so refreshing, and he found that spending time with her was somehow making him a better person. That bright smile of hers became a beacon for him each and every day, and he found himself unable to prevent the grin that built on his own face whenever he saw it. For the first time in years, he felt so warm, and it was because of her…he wondered if that's what love felt like; if that's what she felt like whenever her eyes fell upon him and her whole face lit up with an unabashed glow.

It felt like such a fragile feeling, and he didn't want to lose that, whatever it was…

But his work toward eliminating the world of E.N.D. had caused her to end up in the crosshairs; too many times had he ran possible scenarios in his head that somehow involved her. If she was killed, he knew he wouldn't be able to withstand another person stolen from his life, and if she witnessed him get murdered himself –worst case scenario- how would he rest in peace knowing her memories were marred with such a horrific vision?

He was well aware that there was strength in numbers, and Juvia was one of the most adaptable and versatile people he knew. He was always glad when she had his back in a fight, and they had pulled off some powerful Unison Raids in the past…but he couldn't have her with him when the time came.

He couldn't have anyone with him.

His emotions were going to betray him like they always did. Always, always, always he got too emotionally caught up in whatever he was doing, and he could never do anything right because of it. His master and her daughter, Natsu, Fairy Tail, Silver, now Juvia…all of them had landed in the line of fire of his own stupid choices at some point, and he was so sick of that happening. How did he plan to defeat E.N.D. when an emotional wound could gouge into him at any time? When there were too many things –people- that could be used against him? He didn't want another failure on his hands- not when this was so important, and definitely not when his feelings were the root of the issue…

So he vowed to make this his last stupid mistake. …and when it was all over, he would be back. But that wasn't a promise he could give and keep though, so he didn't.

"This will be the last time I ever feel like this…I have to make this stop…" he whispered under his breath, slowly approaching Juvia's bed the night of his infamous departure. He almost wanted her to wake up, jolt into an upright position, grab him by the shoulders, and at the last moment get him to change his mind. He wanted her to smack the sense back into him, and maybe ebb away his building obsession with E.N.D… She was quite literally the only thing standing between him and this life altering decision…

But he was making that decision right now, while she was blissfully unaware of what he was about do. Blissfully unable to stop him.

He had spread his markings so that they covered nearly his whole body, a penumbra being amongst the night-made shadows that painted Juvia's room. He blended in almost too well with the dark –aside from the glint in his one red eye- and she didn't stir in the slightest as he loomed over her. He knew he shouldn't even be this close, as it was only making it harder to leave, but if he didn't do it, his weakness would quickly become his own regret.

"You'll never know how sorry I am," he quivered, slowly reaching his darkened hands up to his neck and grasping the chain that hung there. "I should be thanking you, for finally letting me open my heart again after so long…"

His fingers lifted the chain up over his head, pausing a moment to watch the trinket sparkle with the minimal light in the room.

"…but here I go again, screwing everything up. I know that, and yet I can't stop myself." He kneeled down beside her bed, taking her hand in his as lightly as he could, turning it so it was palm-side up. "If there was ever a person that didn't deserve any of this, it's you, Juvia… I can't be the man you fell in love with anymore…but you know that I'll still worry about you."

He gently curled her hand into a fist, until it was firmly clutching the necklace within.

"Hang onto this as tightly as you can, okay? Keep it, and always remember that a piece of the old me still exits…" A watery smile crossed his face, although it was hidden by the darkness. "A piece of the old me…that remains with you."

Hesitantly, he leaned down over her form until his face was nearly flush with hers; then, neatly parting her hair out of her face like opening a curtain, gently pressed a chaste kiss to her forehead. Her face subconsciously lit up, like she knew… He couldn't help but smile–the last genuine smile he'd have for a long time- but then it became sad all over again, because he knew what was going to come next.

And Gray walked away out the door and out of her life, not knowing that this was the moment he condemned her to death by a broken heart.