Title: Meet the Stokes - Nick POV (Last Chance Part 6)
Pairing: Greg/Nick
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: ~7300
Summary: What will it take for Greg to reach his limit - or for Nick to free himself from the chains of his fear? (AU)
Genre: Angst, Romance
Disclaimer: Don't own, don't sue. Just for fun.
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His body clock was shot to hell. It always was during the first couple of days back home. So it was no surprise to him when he woke up on the comfortable couch in a small study off of the back of the kitchen. He rubbed his eyes with the palms of his hands in an attempt to clear the fog and tried to remember how he ended up in this particular room.
Then it all came rushing back - his walk with Greg, the brief make-out session behind the shed, the moment of honesty that was both a heartbreak and a celebration at the same time - then the little bubble of happiness they had created was burst before either of them could get more than two bites of the sandwich they made themselves for lunch.
Fucking Will.
His brother sat closely next to Greg at the table - a little too close. Nick recognized the intimidation strategy right away and tried to remedy the situation. "Back off, Will." Okay, maybe he could have been more subtle.
"You got a problem Little Brother?" Will said while leaning even closer to the nervous man next to him.
"Yeah. Big Brother. Why is it that you're close to fifteen years older than me but you act like you're a fucking child?" Nick glared.
"Language, Nicholas." Will smirked while leaning in front of Greg to grab the other half of his sandwich. "Good to see you're sticking to simple food now."
He watched his lover's face become a bright shade of crimson. "Greg?"
Greg looked across the table apologetically. "I'll give you guys some family time." He said as he scooted his chair back. "I'm not that hungry."
"Where you going, G?" Because I'm going with you. He left the last part unspoken.
"He just told you." Bill goaded. "He's giving us family time."
Nick glared at his brother. "Greg is my family."
'It's okay, Nicky." Greg shrugged. "I didn't get much sleep last night. I think I'll run downstairs and take a nap."
Nick knew Greg. And the look on Greg's face and the tone of his voice was on the edge complete defeat, The mood shift in his boyfriend was dramatic and sudden. Nick knew there was something Greg wasn't telling him. It was something bad and it was something about his brother.
"I'll see you later, Nicky." Greg said before walking toward the basement stairwell.
"His name is Nick!" Bill almost yelled as Greg walked away.
"Would you shut up!" Nick demanded. "What the hell did he ever do to you?"
"My brother." Nick had Will's full attention now. "He did my brother."
"He's not the first guy I've been with, you know." Nick wanted to be perfectly clear. "So stop blaming him. I've been gay for as long as I can remember. If you want to be mad at the first guy I fondled, be mad at Marcus Becker from second grade."
Will looked unconvinced. "You never said anything before."
Nick rolled his eyes. "I wonder why."
"Doesn't really matter. He's the first guy you brought home." Will wasn't backing down. "He's the one here in your family home - making a fool out of you."
"How do you figure he's doing that?"
"Just looking at the way he eats should tell you something." Will grunted. "Shouldn't he be on his best behavior? If he was really such a dream-date he wouldn't humiliate you in front of your family."
"What the hell are you talking about?"
"The way he shovels food like a damn ape-man. I told him though. He needs to show more respect than that. He's an embarrassment. I sure as hell wouldn't want anyone to see that - it's disgusting..."
"What?" Nick knew this wasn't really about the way Greg holds a fork. But the fact that his brother chose that particular flaw to focus on made absolutely no sense. "Did you say all of that to him?" Asshole.
Will nodded and chuckled. "More or less."
Nick lunged across the table, startling the stupid grin right off of his brother's face. "If I ever hear you speak to him that way again I'll put you in the hospital."
"You think you can take me, Brother." Will refused to back down.
"Oh, I know I can - Old Man." Nick clenched his fists and gritted his teeth. "Who the hell do you think you are judging him. Greg is more of a man than you'll ever be. He barely survived a beating a couple of years ago. He saw some tourist getting pummeled by a gang of fucked up kids and he intervened. Saved the guy's life and almost lost his in the process. He had some nerve damage that will never go away. He incapable of holding a fork or spoon any other way. It's just one of the many things he had to learn how to do all over again. Do you think you would have sacrificed so much to help someone else? Would you have the courage to put yourself back together again?"
Will still looked smug, but remained silent.
"You don't have to answer that - I already know." Nick needed to find Greg and he needed to find him now. "Leave him be, Will. I mean it."
Will crossed his arms over his chest and leaned back. "He's not welcome here, Nick."
Nick was suddenly sure of one thing. "I don't want him here, either."
"It's about damn time..."
"I obviously overestimated the Stokes' family integrity." Nick interrupted his brother. "He's too good for this family. Don't worry, Brother, we'll be gone tonight."
Nick tried to shake off the lingering guilt from knowing what Greg had endured on his behalf. He sat on the old leather couch in the old study adjacent to the kitchen and wondered how long he had been asleep. He had only come into the small study to steady his emotions before he went to look for Greg. He wanted to be calm and reassuring - and to do that he needed to calm himself down.
He never meant to fall asleep.
Fuck.
He ran his fingers through his hair in frustration. He was so disappointed in his family. They had been nothing but rude and hostile to Greg since the moment he stepped through the door. I should have done something sooner. I should have dragged his ass out of here yesterday when they wouldn't let him stay in my room. I should have gotten us a hotel room and begged him to forgive me for bringing him here in the first place.
He had known it wouldn't be easy - they both did. After all, every Stokes known to Texas had practically begged him not to bring his boyfriend. But they were Stokes and Stokes were nothing if not proper and polite. The worst he expected was an icy reception with gradual thawing as they got to know the man he had fallen in love with so many years ago.
These people were not the same people he grew up with.
It's time to go home.
Nick took a deep breath and crept out of the study to find Greg. He knew exactly where he would be and found himself standing at the top of the basement stairwell within minutes. Just go down there a get him. Nick could feel his palms sweating as his breathing became rapid and shallow. Come on, Stokes - man up. He stepped down onto the first step of the narrow space and couldn't breathe. Fucking hell. "Greg?" He managed to call his lover's name between gasping for air. "Greg, baby, are you down there?" No answer. Shit.
"I don't think he's down there." Nick spun around and leaned against the wall. Brianna was standing in the doorway, blocking the only way out, and Nick was trying his best not to trample his niece to get out of the tiny, tiny space.
"Hey, B." He managed to say without too much obvious emotion. "Why do you think Greg's not down there?"
"Because he...left." She shrugged.
"Left?" Nick was starting to forget his claustrophobia because another, more paralyzing fear was taking its place. He swallowed thickly. "Where'd he go?"
"I think he's around here somewhere." She answered while stepping onto the same step with Nick. She lowered the volume of her voice to a whisper. "I checked the front - your rental car is still there."
"What happened?" Nick was whispering now too.
"They caught him down there with the boys." She pointed down the stairs.
Nick was struggling to keep up. "They?"
"Grams and Uncle Will." She explained further. "Though by the time the screaming started, everyone was down there...except you."
"How could I miss that? I was right there in the damn study." Nick realized he just swore at his Niece. "Sorry, B."
"Grams puts us in the basement when we're all here because she says it's soundproof and we can make all the noise we want without disturbing the rest of the house So it's not your fault you couldn't hear."
"Why didn't anyone come get me?"
She shrugged.
"Brianna, what happened?" Nick hated that he immediately saw Greg and naked nephews. He knew Greg wasn't capable of such things, but hearing that Greg was caught with the boys in the basement sent Nick's mind in directions he couldn't control.
Nick knew first hand that adults and children and basements weren't always the best combination. It's Greg. My Greg. He isn't capable of...is he? "Bri, honey, tell me what they caught Greg doing." Nick hated himself for the images he was creating in his mind. He hated himself for even thinking Greg could do anything so vile. He hated himself for jumping to conclusions about what Greg was up to with his young nephews in an isolated basement. "B. Honey..." Nick placed a gentle, reassuring hand on Brianna's shoulder. "...you can tell me anything. Just tell me what Greg did." He hated himself.
"Mario Carts." She answered.
"Mario Carts?" What? "I don't understand."
"We were playing Mario Carts. Greg's really good, too. It started out with just us girls and Greg, but the boys showed up after about an hour and we all took turns. Greg beat the stuffing out of Kayla, so it was Billy's turn. Billy started cheating right away. He always tries to push the controller out of the other guy's hands. Greg was ready for it though. He blocked him and they just started pushing back and forth and laughing - we were all laughing because Greg is really funny - and then they walked in and started screaming at him."
Nick was so confused and felt a million times more guilty for the niggling voice in the very back of his brain that was still assuming the worst. "Why did they start screaming? You can tell me, B."
"Uncle Nick..." Brianna looked at him with the wisdom that can only come from a child. "...don't you love him?"
He wasn't expecting that. "What?"
"I thought you loved Uncle Greg." She said with pure innocence without a hint of judgement.
Uncle Greg? Nick thought of all of the kids throughout the years who had called their molester "uncle" and cringed for still be so suspect of his lover. "What does that have to do with..."
His young niece interrupted him and he could see that she was fighting with herself to do it. It was completely counter to her Stokes' upbringing, but he could also see that she was feeling bitterly disappointed in him. "If you love him how could you think he did anything? How could you love someone who would even be capable of...that?"
"B, honey, do you even know what I'm..."
"I'm not a baby, Uncle Nick." Brianna pushed her way past him and walked down the stairs where Nick wouldn't - couldn't - follow. "Maybe it's better if he did leave. I'm sure knowing that you're just like the rest of them would kill him."
The parting words of his thirteen year-old niece cut him deep. She was right, of course. Just like the rest of them. That's what she said.
Just.
Like.
Them.
He didn't want to be just like them. He wasn't even sure he cared anymore if they approved or accepted or tolerated or...anything when it came to his life with Greg. He sure as hell wasn't going to let them plant seeds of doubt in his own mind because they were too ignorant to know the difference between a child molester babysitter and a homosexual love of my life.
And the fact that he even considered for one second that Greg was capable of such things filled Nick with intense, deep shame.
It was exactly the wake-up call kick in the ass that he needed.
We're going home. Right Now.
With his new resolve, Nick started his search for his lover so they could get the hell out of Dodge. Before he could make his way out of the back door to look for Greg outside, he was stopped by the voice of his father's behind him.
"I think we need to talk, Son."
Nick froze with his hand on the door knob. "About?"
"Your...friend...I'm afraid we're going to need to ask him to leave after..."
Nick spun around and for the first time in his life he stood up to his father and every single ideal he was raised to aspire toward. "Don't worry. We're both leaving. I'm sure you'll all feel safer without the fags in the house."
"Nicholas. You're not..."
He didn't want to hear another word of it. He didn't want to hear the innuendo that Greg was somehow responsible for corrupting the golden-boy of the family. He didn't want to hear another cloaked insult. "We're the same, he and I." Nick explained very clearly. "We're both gay, Dad. We're the same."
"No. You're not the same." Bill said through clenched teeth. "You're a good man, Nick."
"So is he." For the first time since the first kiss, Nick felt like he was being the man Greg deserved. "Like I said, he and I are the same." Nick watched his father's stance tense up as he started formulating another argument of why Nick was confused and under the spell of a heathen. "As a matter of fact..." Nick felt his chest swell with pride as the next six words came out of his mouth. "...Greg makes me a better man."
"I don't know if you heard, but we found him with the boys in a compromising..."
"Video games, Dad." Nick's anger bubbled over. "You caught him playing video games. How could you even think...were you all just waiting for an opportunity to...you..." Nick realized he was wasting time when he should be looking for his lover. "You know what - you're not worth the effort...I'm going to find Greg and then we're going home."
"You are home, Son." His father almost demanded.
Nock shook his head sadly. "This isn't home anymore, Dad. You've all made that perfectly clear."
It had been over an hour since Nick had left his stunned father in the kitchen to wander around the property in search of his boyfriend. He couldn't find Greg anywhere. He knew Greg had to be devastated - humiliated - and Nick just wanted to find him and make it better. He wanted to throw him in the car and drive to the nearest hotel and spend the entire night making things right.
But Greg seemed to have disappeared.
He hadn't looked in the room he himself had been assigned for the weekend because he really didn't think Greg would tempt fate by going into the room he had been forbidden to even look at because they weren't a proper married couple. But after looking everywhere else he figured he would give it a shot.
Greg wasn't there.
But he apparently had been earlier. And he left a note. And a present.
Nick wanted to throw up.
The note was poignant and so...Greg.
I tried. I'm really sorry. The Sander's charm has met its match with the Stokes. I'm going home. I called a cab. I'm meeting them at the end of the drive so no one notices. Could you bring my bags when you come home? I didn't want to take the time to pack. Okay, the truth is I want to sneak out like the coward that I am. Please thank your parents for the invitation. I wanted to give this to you tomorrow but now I won't be here and I still want you to have it on our anniversary so I'm leaving it here and you totally don't have to keep it. I hope I'll see you at home on Monday. I'm really sorry.
P.S. I swear I wasn't doing anything inappropriate or weird down there. I promise you.
P.S.S. I love you.
God. Nick smiled grimly. He even rambles in notes. He took the gift bag from the same night stand where he found the note and moved tissue paper around until his fingers felt it. He knew immediately what it was.
It was heartbreaking.
It took less than fifteen minutes for Nick to gather all of their belongings from two separate floors of the house. He was still a little shocked that he saw no one while he made his escape. There were no less than twenty-seven Stokes of all ages in the house and he didn't see a single soul.
It was either divine intervention or they were all hiding until the golden-boy-turned-black-sheep was gone. To Nick, it really didn't matter either way. The only thing that mattered was getting to Greg as soon as humanly possible. During the entire hour-long drive to the airport, Nick's mind ran through romantic scene after romantic scene. He pictured Greg sitting sadly in an uncomfortable chair in the terminal, waiting for the last flight to Vegas. Nick would walk right up to him, pull him into his arms, tell him he loved him and there was nothing he would rather do than to marry him and then he would kiss his tear soaked lover right there in front of hundreds people - who would all cheer them on for the happy, sappy reunion.
The last part was optional.
By the time he had turned in his rental car and shuttled himself and three bags to the terminal he found that he had missed the last direct flight to Vegas.
And Greg wasn't sitting sadly on any bench at any terminal waiting for the cheer squad to applaud their kiss.
Greg was long gone.
So Nick did the only thing he could think of and paid way too much money for a stitched together itinerary that took nine hours with three stops and two plane changes to get him home.
It occurred to him on the second stop that he would have gotten home sooner had he just waited for the next direct flight in the morning.
But that's how desperate he was to get to Greg. He couldn't even think logically.
He almost lost his shit when he finally walked into their bedroom and saw Greg sleeping.
It had been a long night and excruciatingly emotional journey and he was so beyond relieved that Greg hadn't decided Nick wasn't worth the trouble and left him for good.
Nick didn't waste any time joining his lover in bed. He didn't even remember taking his clothes off, but he realized he did when he felt skin-on-skin from head to toe.
He didn't even try to not wake the man he was smelling with deep gasps of air. Greg's body stirred to life and Nick couldn't stop the tears when he felt the man in his arms turn to face him and snake his arms around Nick's waist.
"You're home." Greg's voice sounded heavy with sleep and emotion.
Nick buried his fingers into the messy mop of curls. When he saw the glint of light reflecting off of his finger as it sank into the soft locks, he thought of the perfect way to respond. He worked the smaller band off of a finger on his other hand and pushed Greg onto his back. He held the shiny band in front of Greg's face. "You left this. I thought you might want it so I brought it home for you."
Greg smiled. "Let me see." He said as he pulled Nick's other hand from his hair. Nick watched Greg's eyes well up when he saw that Nick's left ring finger was now adorned with the matching ring. "Does this mean you like your gift?"
Nick slipped Greg's ring onto his finger as he whispered. "I love my gift." He placed a soft kiss on Greg's lips. "I love you."
He felt like he didn't deserve the smile that lit up Greg's face. He couldn't believe that the man grinning like a fool beneath him was so happy just because Nick Stokes came home and gave him a ring. A ring that Greg actually bought himself. He didn't think he would ever understand Greg's devotion to a man that spent so many years taking him for granted.
And it wasn't just happiness that Nick saw in Greg's smile. There was also relief in his eyes. He thought I would leave him. That just wouldn't do. Nick kissed Greg with so much desperation to make him understand that he would never, ever leave that he elicited a shocked gasp from his lover. It only took a second for Greg to get on board and kiss back with just as much desperation. After several minutes of bruising kissing, Nick pulled back enough to look Greg in the eyes. There was so much to talk about - so much to say - so many regrets and so many promises to never do anything to regret again.
But first he just needed to feel. He needed to reassure himself that Greg was here.
"Nick..." Greg's eyes filled. "...I'm sorry..."
"Please don't." He couldn't stand to hear Greg apologize for being so damn patient and accepting of people who didn't deserve to breathe the same air with him.
"I really tried." Greg ignored Nick.
"I know."
Greg's eyes clouded. "I didn't..."
"Greg." He couldn't stand it. "I know. Okay? I know." He didn't mean for it to come out so harshly. And he felt immediate and profound remorse. "Greg..."
"Did they tell you what happened?" Greg asked with a slight tremor to his voice. "Do you know?"
"I didn't hang around long enough to get the details. I don't really care what the details are - at least not from them. You're the only one that matters, G. I want to hear everything and then I want to spend the rest of my life making it up to you." Nick caressed Greg's stubbled cheek. "But right now I don't want to talk."
"No?" Greg's amazing resilience kicked in. The pain was still there, but it was now hiding behind a playful twinkle.
Nick could feel himself smirking before he kissed Greg's neck. His skin was warm and was potent with Greg-smell. "No." He whispered before trailing tiny kisses along Greg's jaw.
"Don't you think...ohgod...don't you think we should talk about it?" Greg was almost breathless just from the light nipping.
It was such a relief that Nick allowed a nervous chuckle to ghost across Greg's face. "Yes. We will. We'll talk a lot - later." Nick's hands skimmed across pale skin covered in old scars that reminded Nick of how many times he had almost lost him. "Right now I want to do something else."
"Nick..." Greg almost begged as their hard cocks started a fire between them.
"Greg, please..." Nick was begging. "...please Baby, fuck me. Please. Just (kiss) fuck (kiss) me."
And everything shifted. They both knew what it meant. Nick could count the number of times he had let Greg fuck him on his hands and still have a few fingers left over. Nick never really liked it before Greg. And he had to admit that with Greg, it actually felt good - really, really good - but he still wasn't a big fan. The only time that Nick wanted it that way was when he needed to feel connected - possessed - stretched and filled to the point of having absolutely no doubt that he was alive and loved and part of something real. They could both recall every single time - that's how special and rare it was.
The time when a gun was so close to Nick's face he could smell the gun metal.
There was the night Greg held NIck all night and murmured in his ear that he was safe and no one was in the attic watching them.
There was the time that Greg was crumpled on a floor full of glass and flames.
There was the time Nick was buried and the time Greg was beaten and the time Nick lost his shit when he thought the shrink molested the dead boy in the blanket.
And of course - there was the time he watched Greg almost die against the brick wall of the lab.
And now Nick needed it more than he can ever remember needing it.
And that's the way it always was - every single time - it was all about Nick's needs. It was Nick who needed the reassurances. It was Nick who needed the comfort. Greg was always so willing and so damn good, but it was always Greg taking care of Nick and they both knew it. Just the timing told them what and who it was about. Because Nick made a habit of disappearing any time something went horribly wrong – any time people were forced into the little bubble he had secured around them. Nick wasn't really there when it was Greg who was falling apart with need. By the time Nick showed up, Greg was relatively whole. At least that's what Nick told himself.
But this time was different. This time was surely about Nick – but it was about Greg too. They both needed to feel the connection that only comes from Nick letting go enough to be vulnerable. The sex was really only symbolic of what was happening underneath the surface. Nick was giving in and giving up and letting himself be consumed in every way by his lover. It was the only way Nick had ever been able to feel even close to real. Of course he hadn't really understood it all until he had nine hours with himself to think about it. He sat on planes and in airports – fingering platinum bands and contemplating eight years of his life. Each brush of fingertip to smooth metal brought another fragment of his shattered existence into place. He felt his heart seize in his chest when the final piece connected with all the others.
Greg was real.
Greg knew him better than anyone. Greg had seen the best of him and the worst of him and loved him despite himself. He never had to lie or hide or make shit up when it came to Greg because Greg accepted the full package without hesitation. Greg understood him when he didn't understand himself. It was only through Greg that Nick felt real too. It was only through Greg that Nick was complete because it was only Greg with whom Nick could ever be complete.
Why hadn't he ever understood that before? Why did it take so many years and so many close calls and a day and a half of watching Greg sacrifice for the sake of Nick's family to get it? Shame filled him up. He had been sacrificing Greg, too.
For years.
Greg had silently taken over while Nick had been wrestling with his last remaining lingering demons. He had been gently rolled onto his tummy and Greg was now trailing a mixture of soft kisses and solid nips of teeth along the expanse of his back. Nick knew what was coming because it's the way Greg always did this. Greg doesn't rush these rare opportunities. He savors each second. He takes it slow. He almost worships each moment he's given to kneel at the altar of Nick's body. And this was no acceptation – except for the slight tremor of Greg's fingers as they skimmed along his flesh and the murmuring of apologies from his lips.
He wanted to say something. He wanted to tell Greg there was nothing to apologize for. He wanted to tell Greg that in all the years they had been doing this, Greg had never, ever done anything that required regrets on his part. He wanted to tell Greg that the only regrets – the only apologies – belonged to Nick himself.
He wanted to say a lot of things but the only sound he could muster was a low rumble from deep within his chest because Greg's tongue was now circling the place between his parted cheeks - the place that Nick had reserved only for the man currently doing the licking.
Nick squirmed. "G - I haven't had a shower since..."
"You're fine...better than fine...god Nicky...so good..." Greg mumbled before pressing his tongue flat against Nick's opening.
Nick hissed at the sensation and even though he knew Greg was lying because there was no way any man could be rim-worthy after nine hours of travel and a day-and-a-half without a shower. He went with it anyway when he felt the heat of Greg's reassuring husky voice.
"Love eating your ass, Baby."
"Geezus...fuck...G..." Greg had been the only man who was ever given such unlimited access to his body. It was only Greg that Nick had ever trusted enough to become this vulnerable. And this is how Greg always did it. He gave immense pleasure before he took any pleasure for himself. "...feels so good, Greg."
Though from the noises Greg made while he worked magic on Nick's hole – Nick was fairly certain that Greg got a lot out of it, too.
He pushed his hips off of the mattress to get more of Greg's stubble against the inside of his cheeks and more of Greg's tongue inside of the place where Greg's cock would be in a few minutes. Nick can't remember ever feeling this much need for Greg to just take him. He can't remember ever feeling so much desperation for Greg to - "...oh god Baby...feels so good…" fuck him.
And sure - Nick has needed it before, but he's never been so desperate for Greg to fuck him.
It was like Greg could read his mind – or his body – maybe even his soul. He sank his face deeper into Nick's ass to plunge his tongue as far inside as he could before he began the reverse trail of lips and teeth to the hypersensitive skin of Nick's back. Greg soon pressed himself full-bodied against Nick's back and huffed with warm breath against his ear. "Don't move...be right back."
Nick had a tiny moment of panic that Greg was going to just...stop. But then he understood. Greg had leaned across the bed to reach down to the bottom shelf of the small bookcase next to their bed.
"No." Nick immediately felt the tension from his lover at the tone of his voice. He realized that he must have sounded like he wanted to stop - and he certainly wasn't about to let that misunderstanding last for more than one second. "Just you." He tried to explain as clearly as his over-heated brain would allow.
He watched Greg looking back at him with a shocked confused expression. While it was rare for Nick to bottom - they did do it once in a while - but never - ever - without a condom. And not because Nick was worried about diseases - but because Nick hated the way it felt to have someone come in his ass. Hated it. And he was very, very clear about it. He didn't want Greg's come anywhere near his ass. Greg had teased him once and the memory stung Nick a little. "You'll swallow but you won't let me fuck you bare back? That's a little weird Nicky." "If you say one more word about it I'll never swallow again, either." "Relax, Babe. I'm just giving you a hard..." "Just shut the fuck up about it. It makes me sick to even think about...so drop it."
Needless to say neither one of them got any that night.
Nick tried to give Greg the best seductive grin of his life. "Just grab the lube and get back over here and fuck me."
"Nick?" Greg said his name like a hesitant question as he leaned to grab the lube. Once Greg had settled back on top of Nick's reclined body, he rolled his hips against Nick's ass to show him how hard he was and whispered in a nervous, breathy voice against the back of Nick's neck. "Are you sure?"
Nick heard himself groaning more than anything else. "Yes."
"Oh my god...Nick..." Greg sounded nervous and thrilled at the same time.
It was a big deal. Nick knew this, but it was still a little heartbreaking to hearhowbig it was for Greg. After all these years together - this shouldn't be such a monumental moment for them. Nick knew it was his fault and he promised himself to make sure he gave as much as he took from now on.
And by the time Greg slid inside of him, Nick wasn't sure anymore who was giving and who was taking because Greg made even the tiniest of movement impossibly erotic and enormously pleasurable. It felt like he was paying attention to every twitch of muscle or the slightest of moans and calculated some magical sexual formula in his genius brain to respond perfectly.
Or maybe this was the first time Nick paid this much attention to the details.
He was beginning to wonder why he was so resistant to this for so long. He was beginning to wonder if maybe he was the biggest idiot on the fucking planet to have refused this - because this felt so fucking good.
Greg felt so fucking good.
He thinks he heard himself begging for...something. He can't be sure because his brain was being bombarded with tiny, white explosions - but he's pretty sure he just begged for deeper or harder or some combination of both. And - Oh god - did Greg deliver perfectly. He never wanted it to end.
He seriously never wanted it to end.
He reached behind to grip one of Greg's sweaty thighs. "Greg...fuck...G, wait..."
And just like that everything stopped. He felt Greg's weight draped across his back and felt his warm breath against his neck. "What's wrong, Baby? Did I hurt you?" His voice sounded instantly remorseful and it tore Nick's heart out.
"No! No...I just..." Nick wasn't sure how to even explain it. "...I don't want it to be over yet."
And they both stilled. The sound of heavy breathing replaced the rhythm of sweat, skin, and sex. They both knew it was about so much more than just sex.
Nick didn't want them to be over.
After a few moments of pause, Nick felt Greg's mouth touching his neck and shoulders and the top if his spine before long, slender - but remarkably strong - arms wrapped around him and hauled his body off of the mattress. The next thing Nick felt was the warmth of Greg behind him and the back of his own thighs firmly planted against the top of Greg's. Greg was deep inside of him, deeper than Nick had ever allowed anyone, even Greg, before - but it still wasn't enough. Nick squirmed a bit until he could feel Greg slide just a little bit deeper and sighed before leaning his head back until it rested on Greg's shoulder. "Greg..."
Greg nibbled lovingly along the line of Nick's neck before he whispered into Nick's ear. "Never over, Baby."
Nick felt his throat close with emotion and all he could do was nod against Greg's shoulder and hope he understood.
Apparently he did because he was gently thrusting underneath Nick's ass, holding Nick tightly to his chest with finger splayed against Nick's chest with a grip so hard he was surely leaving bruises. Nick could feel the cold metal Greg now wore on his left hand and it felt perfect.
Nick's knees were aching with every muscle in his calves and thighs as his toes curled against Greg's legs. Their bodies moved together - faster and faster. Nick felt a surge of fire flickering up his spine and - god - it felt so fucking good - so good so good so good.
"It's better than good, Nicky." Greg's voice was husky from exertion as he groaned into Nick's neck.
Did he say that out loud? Nick couldn't tell anymore what was in his head and what was coming out of his mouth and he really didn't care because he just wanted to feel everything. Just. Feel.
He grabbed one of Greg's wrists and slid their hands down his chest until Greg took the hint and gripped onto Nick's aching cock and began stroking him perfectly with perfect pressure and expertly timed twisting of fingers around his engorged head until the building pressure between his dick and his prostate were short circuiting every brain cell in his head and his heart was beating out of his chest and damn if he didn't feel a hot trail of tears flowing down his cheeks and it was all too much and not enough and everything in between and why didn't he ever appreciate this as much before because Greg is definitely a gift and Nick was planning on spending the rest of his life making right all the wrongs he had piled upon the man currently rocking him into a blissful release that left him in a silent black euphoria.
When he felt damp sheets beneath his back and a warm Greg draped across his hips, Nick realized he had actually blacked out from the intensity of his orgasm.
That had never happened before.
It was kind of awesome. Nick grinned as that thought sluggishly entered his mind.
They were both still gasping for air as Greg adjusted himself to snuggle against the length of Nick's side. "I'll go get a warm wash cloth and clean you up." Greg said without making any effort to move.
Nick chuckled. "It's okay. We'll take care of it later." Nick heard his own voice and was a little turned on all over again by how rough it sounded. He didn't remember screaming as he came, but it sure sounded like he did.
"You sure?" Greg moved his head enough to look at Nick's profile. "I don't mind. I know how much you hate..."
"Don't hate it." Nick tried hard to complete sentences and pulled Greg's body closer. "Don't leave me."
Again, they both knew Nick meant more than just leaving the bed.
"I won't." Greg assured and nuzzled back into Nick's neck. "But we still need to talk about it."
Nick sighed. He knew Greg was right and he knew there was a lot to figure out together and he knew that the last three days had changed everything between them - hopefully for the better - but for now all Nick wanted to do was keep holding his lover and listening to the way they breathed in exactly the same rhythm and feel the realness that only Greg had ever been able to instill in his life.
"I know." Nick turned onto his side so he could fully embrace Greg. They were sweaty and sticky and gross by most people's standards but Nick didn't care about any of that. "We will. I promise."
That seemed like enough for Greg and as soon as Nick felt Greg's relax in his arms and make the adorable sound that Greg swears isn't snoring, Nick allowed himself to drift off into slumber thinking about all the ways he was going to make up for every wrong he had ever done to the man not snoring in his arms.
The next time he opened his bleary eyes, he found himself alone in a wrecked bed. He couldn't help feeling a little bit apprehensive and wondered if Greg had come to his senses and left him. Greg had so many reasons to leave and just one of them would be justification for walking away with no regrets.
He slowly pushed himself from the twisted nest of pillows and sheets and sat on the edge of the bed with his feet pressed firmly into the carpet. He yawned with his arms stretched over his head and winced from the ache between his cheeks - magnified by the tugging of tiny hair from the crusty mess he had fallen asleep without cleaning up. He decided he didn't mind it as much as he thought and wriggled a little to free up the rest of the glued-together-hair-cheek-balls situation. He suddenly realized that there was a lot of silence happening in the apartment and his heart started pounding out of his chest as he thought through all the reasons why that might be.
Nick jumped from the bed and pulled on the closest thing he could grab - which happened to be pair of Greg's hanging-around-the-house-sweats. He peed as fast as possible and rushed into the kitchen to start his search for Greg. When he didn't find him leaning against the counter sipping coffee his apprehension converted to full blown freak out. Greg never moved far from the coffee maker until he had had at least three cups in him. He hadn't even made coffee and this fact made Nick want to throw up. "Damn it."
"What?" Greg startled him from behind.
Nick spun around and made an embarrassing sobbing sound as relief swept through him. "Couldn't find you."
Greg held up a brown paper bag. "We were out of coffee."
"Oh." Nick took two steps and pulled Greg into a fierce hug. He buried his face into Greg's neck and let himself cry. "Oh."
Greg dropped the bag onto the counter behind them and wrapped his arms around Nick. He held onto Nick as if it were a matter of life and death. "Hey. We're okay. Okay?"
"I don't know who those people were. They...I've never seen them be so...I swear Greg, I would have never...if I had known that...I wouldn't...god I'm so sorry...please..."
"I'm not going anywhere, Nicky." Greg interrupted. "We'll talk, we'll figure it all out together, and then we'll move on. Together. Okay?"
Nick nodded and clung tighter. "Why?"
He wasn't sure if Greg would understand the question. Why is he still here? Why has he forgiven Nick for so much? For so long? Why is Greg standing here reassuring the clueless, selfish man who was just starting to get it?
"Because I love you, Nicky."
And if that was enough for Greg then that was enough for Nick, too.
"I love you, too Baby."
TBC