Everything you have loved has turned to stone

Yuki had never been the academic sort. She had a mild interest in science, but only the parts that didn't go straight over her head. She enjoyed literature immensely, but thought it quite a shame to ruin a good book by writing an essay on it. She would much rather have lengthy conversations about her favourite novels with whoever she could get to listen to her – usually Kaname – she thought that a much more enjoyable way to go about the whole thing.

Yuki's passion – and talents – lay in music. When she was younger she used to enjoy putting on show for her parents and Kaname, but after her mother and father's deaths, Yuki began to focus solely on her piano playing. It was something her mother, Juri, had begun to teach her and it felt important to Yuki that she continue to practice every day after Juri was gone, as though Yuki were keeping a part her mother alive with her somehow by doing so. It became a refuge for her, from all those bad thoughts, and later from the monotony of life trapped inside her own home. Kaname loved to hear her play and while he was away she would throw herself into practicing. It was always worse when he wasn't there – she needed the distraction.

One evening, during a meal with Kaien, it suddenly struck Yuki that it had been weeks since she last played. She could not believe that she hadn't thought of it sooner. She was used to playing every day.

Yuki asked Kaien right away if there was somewhere she could practice at the Academy and he happily replied that there was indeed, though only inside the school building. As long as no one else wanted it, Yuki was welcome to use the school's piano.

Delighted, she decided to waste no time in finding the school music room. As soon as she finished her meal Yuki quickly made her way over to where the classrooms were. There was still an hour before curfew, when the building was locked, and Yuki hoped that no one else would be using the piano.

She found the music department without much difficulty, but it hardly mattered. Upon peering into the room with the piano in it Yuki found it was already occupied. A boy and a girl were both sat at the piano; the boy played a pretty tune, while the girl grinned at him fondly.

Her initial disappointment faded quickly, though: the boy was talented and Yuki loved to listen to music as much as she loved to play it. She watched the couple for a few more seconds through the slightly open door then she sank down onto the floor with her back against the wall, a small smile on her lips as she listened to the music.

In all the excitement of living somewhere new, meeting new people, doing new things, Yuki had somehow forgotten about this... The feeling that came over her when she listened to or played her favourite music had been the most wonderful thing she had – perhaps the only thing that kept her going – during the time she spent locked in that house. How could it have taken so long for her to miss it?

As the boy played, Yuki's fingers itched to take over and she wondered if this would become a new routine for her – lurking outside the music room, waiting to steal away any precious minutes of practise time that the students of the school would allow her. As much as Yuki was enjoying being able to listen to the music, what she was waiting for really was her chance to sweep into the room and play for herself. And she got her wish when the girl said something about there still being time left before curfew and, soon after, the two emerged from the room. They barely even noticed Yuki's presence as they set off down the corridor and out of sight.

Yuki grinned at her luck and hurried into the room. Sitting down at the piano, she was reminded of home in a new light. She remembered the feeling of playing a piece that she had been practicing for weeks while Kaname watched, smiling... how a grin would spread over her face as she finished and he would clap and tell her she had improved. Yuki spent so much time thinking badly of that house, but there had been good times. It was just easy to forget sometimes.

Yuki played a few notes and wondered when she would next see Kaname. Her life lately had been too full of excitement for her to really miss him, but as she began to play one of her favourite pieces, the familiarity of it had her playing as if to him. First she played a few classical pieces then moved on to some of her favourites to sing along to. Yuki loved singing. It kept her spirits up like nothing else.

She became so absorbed in the music that she did not notice the minutes flying by and somehow it happened that the first time Yuki forgot about Zero since arriving at Cross Academy was also the first time he allowed himself to really pay attention to her.

It had surprised Zero to open the door of the music room, ready to tell whichever student was in there that it was time to return to their dorms, and instead find the dark haired vampire girl there.

First Zero blinked in surprise, and then he wondered what the hell was wrong with him. He could usually sense a vampire coming a mile off. But... at this moment this girl didn't seem anything like a vampire. She was facing away from him so he could only see her face in profile, but Zero could see how completely engaged in the music she was. Her expression was entirely peaceful – serene even – something he had never seen on a vampire before. Zero had never been overly interested in music, particularly not anything like this girl was playing, but he listened to her then and her voice wasn't powerful, but it was soft and sweet and maybe, just maybe, he found it somehow beautiful because there he was – frozen with one foot through the door as he watched her fingers move across the keys like it was the most natural thing to her in the world.

Yuki was not even aware of Zero's presence until he stepped into the room and told her that the building was about to be locked up for the night. For a moment she simply stared at him, taken by surprise at his sudden appearance, then she jumped up and quickly closed the piano lid. "Oh yes, of course!" she said, as a blush spread across her cheeks. For some reason Yuki couldn't quite bring herself to look Zero in the eye as she hurried from the room.

As she made her way out of the building Yuki couldn't help but feel rather embarrassed at having been interrupted by Zero. She didn't like the idea of someone who was always so cold towards her seeing her doing something that she was so passionate about. He must have thought she looked so ridiculous. But... was that really what Zero was like? He didn't seem like the sort to care about such things. He probably hadn't even been paying attention to what she was doing. After all, he did his best to ignore her every other time he saw her.

Lately Yuki had noticed that Zero seemed to be getting used to her presence at the academy, though it was little progress as he was still far from friendly towards her. But it was true that he seemed less hostile towards her now than he used to be. Just then in the music room, when he had spoken to her, he hadn't even looked that angry. But it occurred to her (and really it seemed like the most likely thing) that he was so unreadable he could easily hate her just as much as he always had without showing it.

But Yuki refused to give up! Her heart was so filled with the hope that one day he would look at her and see, not a vampire, but the girl she really was. She wanted it so much it almost hurt.

That night in the music room was a regular dwelling point for Yuki's thoughts and she longed to ask Zero what he had heard. Though she was a little scared of what the answer might be. If there came an answer at all.

It was one evening as she stepped out onto the Academy grounds and saw a distant sliver head amongst the trees that Yuki finally asked. And she and Zero finally had their first conversation.

Zero had stepped out of the trees and onto the path by the time Yuki reached him and called a soft cheery 'hello'. She felt she hid her nerves well as she smiled brightly at him. Zero acknowledged her greeting with a small grunt, refusing to meet her eyes. He made to continue down the path on his way to the school building without her, but she quickly fell into step with him. Yuki stared up at Zero, wondering if he would tell her off, but he was ignoring her, staring straight ahead – face as unreadable as ever.

She walked a few steps alongside him then, timidly, she began, "Zero...?"

Yuki wondered if Zero was paying attention, then he sighed, a short huff of breath. "What is it?"

"I was just wondering... if you heard me playing the other day?"

"No."

Yuki hesitated a second, "Oh... okay."

There was an awkward silence. They continued to walk and Yuki wondered if Zero had answered a little too quickly. Perhaps with a little too much vehemence. But she didn't want to press him and the silence continued.

She could see the school building now, where Zero was due to start his prefect rounds, and Yuki fumbled for a new topic.

"Zero, what types of music do you like anyway?"

This time he glared at her – apparently he wasn't past that yet.

"What does it have to do with you?"

"Nothing, I was just wondering."

Yuki stared up at Zero with innocent eyes, but he was unimpressed.

"Don't speak to me so casually."

She still managed to be surprised by his bluntness. Yuki stopped walking as she tried to come up with a retort, but all that would come to her was the simple question: "Will you ever stop hating me?"

Zero came to a stop before the building and slowly turned to face her. Yuki noticed that his fists were clenched at his sides, but he spoke calmly, "Why should I?"

She looked at him, straight in the eye. Somehow she was ready for this question and she managed to answer him with equal calm, "Because I'm not what you think I am. I've been waiting for you to realise that, but it doesn't seem to be happening. I'm not a monster, Zero."

It took him a few moments to respond to her but Yuki couldn't figure out what he was thinking in that time. She didn't get the impression he was really considering her words all that thoroughly. After a short silence, he asked, "Why should you be any different?"

His gaze was so unforgiving; Yuki couldn't hold it any longer. She looked down at her hands as she nervously wove a strand of hair between her fingers. She tried to express her thoughts in a coherent manner, "I can understand it a little, I guess... what a hunter must see in a vampire... always having to deal with the darker side of our species... But you're a vampire too, so surely you must understand that that sort of thing is a choice you make for yourself?"

She peered up and the look that crossed Zero's face then was the closest Yuki had seen to some kind of emotion from him. She didn't understand the reaction and was tempted to ask about it until he said, "What... are you talking about?"

"Maybe I didn't say it very well..." Yuki struggled to find the right words, watching for another flicker in his eyes. "Really, I just mean that I'm not like those other vampires... that kill humans. Honestly, I'd never even met a human until I came here."

Zero's face became unreadable again. "That doesn't mean anything."

"It does! Kaname's the only person whose blood I've ever wanted. I don't need anyone else's. Isn't that how it is for the rest of us? We aren't monsters because we choose to love."

His eyes narrowed as he looked at Yuki.

"Love stops us from being monsters? I don't believe that."

Zero turned and went to enter the school, then stopped and added, "Love only makes things worse."

Then he went inside.

A/N: btw I only recently read the VK fanbook and saw that Juri actually did play piano, so I'm quite happy to realise that this random little idea I had about AU Yuki being musical could be considered to be vaguely rooted in canon. Cool! Also I realise that Yuki being a bookworm is kind of against her her character but I figured it would be hard for her to be the same athletic tomboy when she's never really been outside before the start of this fic. So having her be into reading makes sense to me. What else is she going to do with her time, really?

(chapter title from broadripple is burning by margot & the nuclear so and so's though i mixed up the lyrics a little bit)