Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, sadly, although i wish i do, in my dreams Edward's mine! But my dreams arn't real therefore Edward isn't mine...
Darkness
BPOV
Song: Banana Pancakes by Jack Johnson
Can't you see that it's just rainin'
There ain't no need to go outside
But baby, you hardly even notice
When I try to show you
This song It's meant to keep you
From doin' what you're supposed to
Like wakin' up too early
Maybe we could sleep in
I'll make you banana pancakes
Pretend like it's the weekend now
I felt my eyes open slowly, small flickers of light flooding through my protective lids as I try to close them tighter, the light burnt my eyes when I finally regained the power to see. The picture was fuzzy at first becoming clearer to reveal three figures one in which sped my heart up just looking at him, auburn hair was spread over his pale head, looking worriedly at the blonde man I knew to be Dr. Carlisle Cullen and next to them was my small pixie.
"Hey," I felt my throat tighten in pain as the words flooded out of my mouth, I blinked back the tears in my eyes, "What's happening?" I asked banishing more tears behind my lids.
"Oh Bella, your awake! I was so scared, Edward called saying he was in the hospital and you had collapsed and I thought you were dead and I missed you so much. You can't leave me Bella! I love you so much, please don't ever scare me like that again," Alice mumbled into my skin as she hugged me tight. I remembered faintly what had happened, the beautiful piano piece Edward said was mine. The tears rushed to my eyes just remembering it, I looked over at him and saw his normally messy hair at all angles like he had been running his hands through it repeatedly, something I had learnt he only did when he was nervous. I sent him a small smile assuring him that I was fine.
"I'm sorry but I have to ask you to leave, visiting hours are over," Carlisle said looking at me with an emotion I couldn't decipher in his eyes.
"Dad, can't you just bend the rules just this once?" I saw Edward plead as his father led him out of the door. Alice gave me a small kiss on the cheek and another lecture on scaring her before she skipped to the door pleading her case with Edward.
"I'm sorry, an inspectors in today and we can't make any exceptions to hospital rules. Tomorrow I'm sure you can twist them but today, no," his face was one of authority and Edward sent me a small smile before he left the room with his head down, Alice at his side skipping away laughing about something.
"Bella," Carlisle started, I turned my face to look at him not sure what emotion I should be feeling by the plastic look on his face, "I ran more tests while you were unconscious to discover what had happened to you back at the house," he started in the tone I learnt he only used with patients, "I found in the scans," at this point he held up a scan of my lung and I could already see the difference from before, I chocked back the tears before he even started to explain, "it seems that the tumors are growing more rapidly than we first expected," I diverted my eyes to the window. I could see children playing in the park across the road, they all looked so happy. I wished that for once I could be like them so carefree, so alive.
"From this we can now deduce that the original prediction of you life span has been reduced from 6 weeks to 4 weeks," I didn't move my eyes from the window but even I could do the calculation.
1 week.
At the most.
1 week of my life left to live.
I began to sit up but Carlisle walked over and gently moved me back down to a lying position, "I'm sorry but we are going to have to keep you in the hospital, I'll start you on pain medication straight away. It will be uncomfortable at first but you won't feel it soon afterwards," I continued to stare blankly out of the window, trying hard to keep my tears from escaping.
"Don't tell him," I whispered, still looking at a brunette girl laughing as she ran away from a taller bronze haired boy, "I can't tell him," I whispered. One tear rolled down my cheek but I wiped it quickly away voiding my face from any emotion. A small girl had come to join the brunette and the bronze haired boy just shaking her head with her hands on her hips as she pointed at something on the brunette's dress. I laughed at how much they resembled Alice, Edward and I.
I wiped away another tear before I heard Carlisle leaving the room leaving a small sorry floating through the air. I touched my head and felt the flat surface on which there was once brown locks, my fingers trailed down my face onto my cheek bones I could feel the difference in my face, it was thinner and weaker, my once plump lips were cracked and shrivelled their once pinkish colour had paled into an almost white. My hands travelled down towards my stomach to the place I had learnt held my poison, my end but also my beginning.
It was within this moment that I realise I would rather I died of cancer now and have met and loved Edward Cullen than to have lived a cancer free life without him.
My illness brought us together and taught me how to love but it will also now is pushing us apart.
Making me leave when I have finally found the one thing worth living for.
The one thing I truly love.
The one thing now I know I could never live without.
I love him so much that in my own thoughts I feel that I also love my illness, the one thing that brought us together but also the same thing that will finally force me to go.
Forever.
My eyes wondered over to the park once again.
The children were laughing, running, skipping, jumping, smiling, things I wish I had had time to do more of, things that just left you happy, ecstatic, things that make you want to yell up to the skies, things that you start to regret not doing enough of, the things that you love even though you've never done them.
"Bella?" I heard a velvety voice float from the door, I didn't turn my head knowing who it was already, "Are you okay?" he asked sitting down on the chair beside the bed that Alice usually resides in.
"Peachy," I pealed my face away from the window towards the face of the Adonis before me. We both started laughing yet mine came out as more of a strangled cry.
"Has the pain medication started working yet?" he asked taking my hand in his own, kissing my knuckles lightly.
"A nurse came in and gave it to me about 5 seconds ago," I smiled at him, I patted the space beside me on the bed. He shot me a crooked grin that sped my heart up to an extraordinary speed, he climbed onto the space in the bed and wrapped his arms around me, pulling me closer. The heat radiating off his body as I buried my face in his chest, intoxicated by the smell.
"Edward?" she mumbled into his shirt, she felt his lips on her forehead as he nodded into the kiss, "I hate hospitals."
We just laughed until I lifted my head from his chest, "Can you promise me something?" I asked him.
"Depends on what," he chuckled looking at me suspiciously before kissing my lips softly.
"I don't want to die in a hospital," I tried to lift the corners of my mouth up into a smile but gave up when I realised that mission had failed, I put a finger onto Edward's lips, "everyone is dying Edward, just some people have to leave earlier," I whispered removing my finer from his perfect lips. He kissed my forehead again.
"What do I have to promise?" he whispered back to me, drawing patterns onto my bare head.
"To not let me die here, anywhere but here," I mumbled burying my face back into his chest.
"I'll try," he whispered kissing my head.
"That's all I can ask," I smirked and kissed him on the lips fully aware of the limited time I had left.
"I haven't decided yet..." he trailed off with a crooked smile as I looked at him questionably, "if you look batter with hair or without."
"Oh, a bald man or a girl?" I asked with a laugh.
"Well, for your information I happen to have a thing for bald men," I raised an eyebrow.
"Should I be jealous?" I asked, the sarcasm clear in my voice.
"About what?"
"Whether or not my boyfriend will be running off with a balding middle aged man," I said in a patronizing voice.
"I won't be leaving you," he whispered in my ear kissing my lips once more, "ever."
I felt dizzy again as the room started spinning around me, I lifted up my head and it was starting to shake, my body started to tense as it shook harder. I felt Edward's body remove itself from my side as my body shook erratically, I couldn't stop myself. I felt myself getting held down on my side but the shaking still didn't stop until suddenly I heard the beeping in the distance quicken.
I heard voices call my name.
My body still shaking.
I heard a velvety voice yell my name and a final touch on my leg sent shocks throw my system.
I felt a sharp pain travel up my spine as my shakes finally stopped and my world blanked out once again.
I won't be leaving you... ever.
'I'm sorry,' I whispered again before I gave into the darkness.
Maybe we could sleep in
I'll make you banana pancakes
Pretend like it's the weekend now
And we could pretend it all the time
Can't you see that it's just rainin'
There ain't no need to go outside
Ain't no need, ain't no need
Rain all day and I really, really, really don't mind
Can't you see, can't you see
We've got to wake up slow
-Banana Pancakes, Jack Johnson
I hope you enjoyed it, thanks for reading... PLEASE REVIEW! Since you all every so nicely gave me 20 reviews i gave you a chapter... good deal?
i will write another one quickly for 25 reviews???
Remember; OBAMA STOLE HIS CATCHPHRASE FROM BOB THE BUILDER! CAN WE FIX IT?! YES WE CAN! (Long Live Bob The Builder!)
*For anyone who didnt know that last sentence was sarcastic ;P*
*But I do actually like Bob The Builder, because WHO DOESNT?*
edward (.) x (.) cullen (.) x (.) forever