Song For This Chapter: Make Me Wanna Die - The Pretty Reckless

BPOV

I saw his jaw clench as his hands almost broke the steering wheel, and then he was yelling at me like I had just killed the queen.

"Bella do you really expect me to let this go? How come I never knew? We spend nearly every night together and every day, and you've never even given me a fraction of information that you were dealing with this! I could have helped you! How come you never once told me what was going on?" He was shaking, and I had this terrible feeling that if he had been human, he would have been crying by now.

"Bella this is a part of you! And you never told me! You never…"

This was too much for me to bear. I moved forward in my seat to comfort him, and surprisingly he didn't push me away. He just let me hold him as his chest rocked against my own, and for once I didn't have a single thing to say on the matter. We were unprepared for this, I realized. Unprepared for secrets. Our relationship had had its ups and downs since it began (can you say a certain earth-shattering forest departure, anyone?) but in the long run they had only made us stronger. I wasn't so sure that that would be the case this time.

I looked down at my feet as the silence continued, and he eventually seemed to regain control of himself as he sat up and looked straight at me. I expected him to be angry again, even furious. I expected mean words and maybe even a little violence taken out on the car, but no, instead, he hugged me.

"Bella, you can't ever do anything like this again, do you hear me? I never want…I never want you to feel like you can't tell me anything, no matter how much you think I would disapprove," he whispered. His voice was remarkably calm despite the tense situation. I just nodded at him, still at a loss for words. I had never meant to hurt anyone.

"I think… I think we have a lot to talk about," I said.

"Then tell me." Edward insisted, and I smiled.

I would. I would tell him everything, only leaving out parts when necessary. I would tell him about Marlene and the group and everything in Phoenix, and he would finally hear the story he deserved to know. But I wouldn't promise to never cut again. Because despite his orders, I knew that I would cut again. It just wasn't something I had much control over. I didn't view it as any kind of addiction of sorts, but cutting… was just something I needed. And Edward wouldn't understand that. He couldn't.

"I don't know where to begin, Edward." I confided. "I mean, on the one hand you act like you really want to know, but on the other…" I trailed off, leaving him to think about it.

"On the other hand I just commanded you what to do without hearing you out," he guessed. Good guesser. I nodded, and he grimaced in response. "Bella, it's not that I don't want to hear what you have to say. I always want to, you know that. It's just; this is one of those cases where I can't exactly let you have your way." His gaze was beseeching as he stared at me, and I was only slightly aware that I was pretty much on top of him from our earlier hug-session. Our arms were the only parts of us that still really touched, him holding my hands, and I instantly wanted to end that simple contact. Because he couldn't, he just couldn't intrude like that, it wasn't fair. I sighed.

"You can't tell me what to do Edward, and you know that." I persisted quietly. He seemed to be expecting this, for he didn't show any outward signs of indignation.

"Bella, love, be serious, please. You just told me-" he started, with a slight twinkle to his eye. I knew that twinkle from a million miles away, and I could tell his strategy before his lips were even at my ear.

It didn't mean I could fight it

"-that you used to cut yourself. That you do cut yourself," he shuddered. "I'm not okay with that," he murmured against my skin, and I could feel myself sinking to his will with each light kiss he trailed down my face.

"Edward…" He cut me off by moving his lips down to my own, and then quickly back up along my jaw. "You can't," I gasped, "tell me what…"

More kisses, and by now my head was spinning and my heartbeat out of control.

"No, Edward! Just stop, okay? Just stop it right now," I practically shouted, pulling myself away from him as I did so. Because there was no way he was going to get his way on this one, not when it was completely in my control. Yet I could tell that if he kept on going like he was, I wasn't going to last much longer…so no. I had to end it. I wasn't going to promise him something that I knew I couldn't keep.

I looked at him in disgust, shaking my head as I did so. That was a low blow, and he knew it.

I fixed my messed up hair as I scooted back to my seat, him scowling at me the entire time.

"Take me home," I muttered, and it seemed like he was finally going to oblige as he started the car, glowering the whole time. However, I was surprised when he began going in the opposite direction, back to…

"Edward Cullen that is not the direction to my house! I swear if you-" He cut me off again.

"Bella, seeing as you're not the one driving, you don't exactly have very much control over where I do or do not go," he growled. I glared at him again.

"We're done talking," I stated, and he narrowed his eyes at me.

"The hell we are, princess…" he muttered, and then laughed bitterly to himself, a laugh that would send chills to the bone in normal conditions.

"Bella, just a minute ago you told me we had 'a lot to talk about', and now you're telling me we're done talking? I don't think so," he stated.

I laughed, too. "You're specifically doing the opposite of what I asked you to do, Edward. If you're trying to win the award for World's Most Controlling Boyfriend, congratulations, because you're getting it." I snapped, and I could see his anger click back into place as we sped along the empty road.

"Bella you can't be serious! You cut yourself! That's sick, Bella, and if you think any differently then-" He was cut off abruptly by a loud honk coming from my right, and I saw his eyes widen as he comprehended what was about to happen.

A vampire was going to get into a car crash, and I would be on the receiving end of it all.

This day was just full of surprises.

Expecting that? Didn't think so...REVIEW