Chapter 6-Monster

I woke up to an empty space next to me, where Jacob was. I automatically thought that something might of have happened to Paul. I got of the bed and walked towards the door but stopped when I heard voices outside the door, it sounded like if someone was arguing with someone else.

"The relationship you have with her is not right." It was Sam's voice, followed by Jacob's.

"Why not?"

"You know why."

Why was Sam saying this. Is it because I am not good enough for Jacob?

"It's not your problem Sam." Jacob retorted.

"Yes, it is. You are part of the pack and that involves all of us."

"Just stay out of it."

"She's not the right one." As Sam said this I felt my heart sink. He was right, I wasn't good for Jacob and he should now that, but it just hurts to hear it from someone else. I need to get out of here, I wouldn't be able to stand to hear Jacob agree with him. I opened the door and both men looked at me surprised. I ran towards the front door and heard Jacob's voice.

"Bella, wait." He caught up to me and grabbed my hand.

"He's right Jake." I pulled away. Jacob new that I heard what Sam had told him.

"He's wrong." He said in a serious tone.

"No." Was all I said before I walked out the house. I just remembered that Jacob was the one that brought me here and my truck was still at my house. I was going to have to walk home.

"Bella…"

"Jacob… just listen to him. He is right."

"How can you agree with him?"

"I am not good for you."

"Yes you are." He said walking closer to me.

I took a step back.

"I still love Edward, I am not going to love anyone but him." Tears streamed down my cheeks, I was hurting him but it's for his own good. "You're a friend and it'll stay that way."

"Bells." He put his head down. "You're lying."

"I'm not! If I was then I wouldn't say what I am about to tell you!" I yelled.

It's for his own good. I told myself.

"Leave me alone because you can never…ever replace Edward and…I can never love someone like…you."

His head shot up, I saw all the pain I was causing him in his eyes. I ignored it and tried glaring at him so he would believe what I was saying. It seemed that he bought it because he ran towards the woods, trembling, without looking back.

I ran towards the road my vision foggy because of the tears that wouldn't stop flowing. I had a long way home, but I didn't care. I needed time to process everything that had just happened. One minute Jacob is sleeping right next to me, the next Sam is telling him that I am not the right one, then I am break his heart. Now I was no different than Edward. He lead me into falling in love with him, just like I lead Jacob into loving me. Then he broke my heart like if I meant nothing to him and I did the same. I was no better than him. I just broke the heart of the person who held me together, I am a monster.

My sobbing was leaving me breathless and it was harder to walk. It was getting darker, but I didn't have the strength in me to walk any faster. From far away I saw the headlights of a car, how I wished I brought my truck. As the car got closer is slowed down, I immediately recognized it, Charlie's cruiser. The car stopped and he rolled the windows down.

"Bella?"

"Umm, hi dad."

"What are you doing walking by yourself, alone. I thought you were with Jacob." He raised an eyebrow.

"I…we… got into an argument." I didn't want to tell him what had really happened. "I just want to go home."

"Well then get in." He was studying me carefully. "What happened, why did you guys argue?"

"I don't really want to talk about it." I really didn't, so I changed the subject. "What were you doing going to La Push?"

"I read your note and decided to go see the game with Billy."

"Oh, dad sorry for ruining your plans. You can go if you want."

"Nah, it's ok. I'm actually tired, it was a long today."

"Did something happen?"

"Some hikers saw some wolfs." He said.

"Oh." Was all I said. A picture of wolf Jacob came into my mind, that reminded me of how he looked when I was breaking his heart. Tears started to gather in my eyes again, but I couldn't cry in front of Charlie or else he would start asking questions again.

The rest of the ride home was quiet. I was now in my room looking out the window, somehow looking at the barely visible moon comforted me. I don't know what I am going to do now that I don't have Jacob to rely on. Today, when I was saying those hurtful things to Jacob I felt like if my heart was breaking too. I do have feelings for Jacob, but I am not good enough for him. He deserves someone that is not broken and that could love him and only him.

I went to my bed and cried myself to sleep. This time not because of Edward, but for Jacob.

"Jacob…Jacob where are you." The forest was dark and terrifying.

There was a weird noise, I didn't know what it was. It sounded like if someone was running towards me, fast. I had a gut reaction that I should run too. I did, I ran as fast as I could, my lungs were burning from the cold air that I was breathing in. The sound got closer and closer, I tried running faster but my legs were tired and were giving up. I tripped over a rock and fell hard on the ground, the running sound stopped too.

"What do you want?" It came out like a whisper. I sensed that someone was standing in front of me.

I lifted my head up, slowly. It was a man, but I couldn't make his face features except for his golden eyes. My heart started beating faster and I knew that he could hear it. The mysterious man smiled and offered me his hand.

I wasn't scared, but I didn't feel safe either. It was like if my hand had its own brain because it was reaching for his hand without my consent. As our hand were going to meet I heard a growl behind me. The mysterious guy's eyes turned black and he hissed. I looked back and there stood a russet colored wolf the size of a bear. It growled again, he was preparing himself to leap just like the mysterious guy was too.

"Stop!" I yelled. "Don't hurt him."

They glared at each other and then looked at me. It was like if they were asking who I was saying that to. I myself wasn't sure. Who do I choose the wolf or the man with the golden eyes.

They didn't wait for my answer, both of their bodies collided with each other and made a dreadful sound.

"NOOOO!" Everything was shaking around me.

"Bella…Bells wake up."

I opened my eyes and saw Charlie staring with a worried look.

"Everything's ok…you're safe." He tried soothing me.

"It's not ok. I broke his heart…I'm evil…how could I do this to him." I was sobbing.

"Is that what happened today?"

Oh no, did I say that out loud and in front of Charlie.

"Yes." He deserved to know at least part of the truth or he might think that it was over Edward.

"You're not evil. It happens, people break up then they get back together." He comforted.

"I guess it does." I said so he wouldn't ask more questions.

"Yeah, now go back to sleep." He patted my head and left the room.

I woke up from an ugly night, I could hardly sleep after the nightmare. It was Sunday and I had a long day ahead of me. I usually spent weekends with Jacob, but now that was not a choice. I doubt he would even want to talk to me ever again, but it was for his own good even if my heart ached for him.

Now that I don't have him I realized that I did mean it every time when I said that I needed him. I took him for granted and now I am paying the prize. I am alone and broken with no one to repair me.

"Hey Bells…um I know that it may be too early but I invited Billy over to watch the game." Charlie said nervously.

"Early for what?" I was confused, it was ok with for Billy to come to our home.

"Well…err Jacob's coming too." He said, walking out of my room at a fast pace. I followed him to the kitchen.

"Wait! What! Why!" I wasn't ready to see him yet.

"His friends are coming over too. There's nothing to worry about." He was sitting at the kitchen table reading the newspaper trying to ignore me.

"That's even better." I said sarcastically and marched back to my room.

How can Charlie do this to me, his only daughter. I know what he is trying to do, he wants me and Jacob to solve things. Charlie always preferred Jacob over Edward.

It was six o'clock, the time Charlie said that the guys would be arriving. I'm was really nervous, I don't want to see dose saddened eyes that he looked at me with the last time I saw him.

There was a knock at the door and instead of opening it I went upstairs, I wasn't ready.

"Bells, you can't hide forever." Charlie said, sternly.

"I know…um I'm just going to the bathroom." I lied.

Rather than going to the bathroom I went to my room and locked the door. I couldn't face Jacob, not after what I told him yesterday.

I stayed in my room for ten minutes, laying down on my bed. The guys were already here, I could hear them speaking and laughing. My heart beat faster as I imagined Jacob sitting down the living room with his cropped, black hair, auburn skin and smiling. I looked at the bedroom door, what if I just went downstairs for five minutes and then come back here? I didn't think about it twice and walked out of room.

I chickened out at the last minute and instead of going to the living room I went to the kitchen. Why was I acting like this. Its not like if Jacob and I were in a real relationship, heck I don't even know what my true feeling towards him are. With that cleared out I walked to the living room.

"Hi." I greeted.

"Hey Bella." They said in unison. Billy, Sam, Embry, Jared and Quill were there.

I looked around the living room again, but Jacob wasn't there. Who cares if he didn't come? I thought. I do. Why did it matter if he came or not, I was the one that didn't want to see him in the first place. Oh, who was I kidding, I do want to see him and make sure that he is okay.

As I walked towards the stairs there was a knock at the door. My heart skipped a beat, could it be Jacob. I hurried to the door and opened it.

In front of me stood a tall, russet colored skinned guy.

"Paul?"