Hey, sorry about not updating. I will try to get back on track, (school starts soon). In this chapter, we get a look at Cassie's soul (Tara can look into souls) and see who she REALLY is.
Cassie POV
Tara started Misery Business by Paramore up. She started singing. We were about a mile away from them. They turned at the strange sound. Mom panicked when I wasn't with them. Then she heard singing. We got closer as the second verse started. She listened and glared at Tara when she sang a certain part. I neared her and then looked at Tara. I flew above them. I dive bombed and then landed on top of Dad. We burst out laughing.
"Cassie, are you okay?" Josh asked.
"Yeah," I said.
"Are you sure? You just laughed at something that didn't have to do with you causing harm to someone. At least, not fully."
"Yeah, Tara brings out that special side of me. The one you will never see because I am really close to breaking your arm."
He gulped. It was hilarious watching him glance back at me worriedly. We finished the flight home.
As soon as we got home I was hit with questions from Mom.
"What happened?" she asked right off. I glanced at Tara, remembering the time when I shut the whitecoat up. We burst out laughing as we remembered. Mom looked at us weirdly.
"A whitecoat came to get me for testing. Cassie told him to lay off. He told her to shut up and she said she wouldn't. When he called her crazy she said, 'Really? What was your first clue?' and shut him up," Tara said between fits of laughter.
"Who is she?" Mom asked, gesturing to Tara.
"She's the one of us that supposedly 'died'," I say to her, hatred dripping off of my voice.
Mom gave me a look that said, Cut the crap. Okay, so she was thinking that to.
"I'm not joking. She is the other one. She looks exactly like me. Can't you see. Without Josh, we would be perfect. Sadly, he has to look different."
Mom looked at Tara. She broke down crying. Dad came down and looked at me with a look that said, What did you do?
"Nothing," I said to his look.
"Max, are you okay?" he asked.
She nodded and then hugged Tara. Fang looked confused.
"We were triplets, her, Josh, and me, and she was taken to the School. Mom thought she was dead. She and I met at the School."
"Oh," he said. I swear, if he doesn't start opening his mouth more I will seriously injure him.
"What was that?" he asked. Crap. I transmitted that to him.
"Yeah, you did," he said again. Crap. I turned my thought transmitter thingy off.
"Who is she?" Grandma Martinez asked.
"My twin sister. Josh's too. We're triplets. She's mine though. I will not let Josh get his hands on her," I said. Laughing maniacally. Tara and I burst out laughing. I had told her about Josh and her exact words were, 'way to perky for me.' Thank you. Someone understands how I feel.
"Why is Cassie laughing at something that isn't completely sadistic?" Josh asked.
"I told you. I have a good side. That good side is very hard to get onto. Tara is currently the only person who has made it there in all of history."
"Why haven't I made it there?" he asked.
"Because you are," I glanced at Tara. She and I then finished the sentence at the same time, "way to perky."
"What's wrong with being perky?" he asked.
"Nothing, for you. For us, it's annoying as all get out," I responded.
Tara and I walked up to our room (she had begged Mom to share a room with me) and we listened to music and danced for a while. As soon as Nudge opened the door, we plopped down on the floor and I pretended to be catching her up on French and Latin.
"I know you were dancing," she said.
"No we weren't," we respond quickly.
"Can you cut that out? It's freaky," she asks.
"Perfect, considering that we're mutant freaks," we say together. Now that I think about it, it is kind of creepy.
"Okay, well, Max said that it's time for you suckers to go to bed. You two have got school tomorrow." With that, she walked out. We got ready for bed and I played the guitar for awhile. Tara eventually fell asleep.
Time Skip: The next day at normal school
Tara's POV
Normal school was much different than I expected. I had expected a more humane version of the School. This was different. This was normal classes. All of my classes were with Cassie. She and I also shared a locker. She was also my tutor. I had little understanding of things in certain subjects. The whitecoats had taught me a little to see how extensive my memory and knowledge was.
"Hey, Goth Girl, who's your new friend?" he asked Cassie. Or was it me? We both looked exactly the same. Right down to the outfits.
"She's my long lost sister Tara. Now play nice. You wouldn't want two girls to break your arms, would you?" she asked with a façade of sweetness. The guy paled. Wow, Cassie wasn't kidding when she said the whole school was afraid of her. I watched her carefully. The kid started stuttering incomprehensively. She made a move and I immediately grabbed her arm, "Cassie, don't do this. You don't have to get violent every time someone insults you." She backed down. The kid looked at me like I was some kind of miracle worker.
"How did you do that?" he asked.
"She listens to me. She knows she can trust me. She doesn't really trust a lot of people. She just hasn't ever felt safe putting her full trust in someone. You really don't understand what she feels on a daily basis. She masks it as anger or irritation. I won't say what it is she truly feels but just know that she is always masking how she truly feels." I hoped Cassie would understand that this person needed to know the truth. He looked at me dumbfounded. As though I had just peered into her soul. Which I did. I can peer into people's minds and souls. It's just that I don't do it unless I absolutely have to. I looked at Cassie and she sent me a thought that said, Why the heck did you tell him that. I have been keeping that secret all my life! I need to look tough. Look weak and get bullied. I learned that early on. You made me look weak! I'm not mad, just irritated. Don't do that again.
I looked at her and responded, Don't worry. I won't he just needed to see how strong you really are, you are much stronger than they think. To keep that locked and hidden for years and masking it as anger and irritation and never letting anyone know what you really feel. Not even your Mom and Dad. That is just how strong you really are.
She looked surprised for a minute, the replied with, Your right. They think I am strong. Not just a strange girl who likes hurting people. They think I am a girl who is strong enough to hide everything she feels. I can't believe it Tara. You actually helped more than I thought possible.
No problem sis, I thought back.
She and I walked to class. We went through the rest of the day without issue.
Time Skip: End of the day. Fang is picking up the kids.
Cassie POV
"Dad! Dad," Josh was practically killing our ears.
"What Josh?" Dad asked.
"You'll never believe it. Cassie went a whole day without hurting anyone!" he blurted.
"Don't make me end that streak right here," I threatened. He gulped and I laughed evilly.
"Cassie didn't hurt anyone. You're delusional," Dad said. I glared at him and he shrunk back a little. My glare has actually made a gang member back down. Long story.
When we got home Mom and the others had to get stuff for a Welcome Home Tara party. Tara and I stayed behind.
I went down to the piano and started playing. I was just screwing around at first until I lapsed into a whole segment of One Republic songs that I was playing by ear. I kept playing and eventually got to some Bach and Mozart. I just loved music. My mom forced me to learn guitar and after that I became secretly obsessed with music. Especially playing music. I stopped for a second to move my hand to the start position of the next song. I started playing and then I heard a small creak of floorboards. I didn't stop. I was enveloped in the music. I was in that special world where you don't care who hears or what they think. You are just in the music. Breathing it. Living it. It's such a special place and I am always happy when I manage to access it. I always finish up with a smile on my face. I love music. It's my life. It's my secret passion. I was currently playing a slightly improvised version of Fur Elise by Beethoven by ear. I just didn't want to stop. I felt someone tap my shoulder and I jumped.
It was Dad.
"You're really good, you know that," he said. I blushed. I didn't care about Tara hearing, but if he heard, that meant the rest of the Flock had too. I ran up to my room saying I had homework. I heard Tara yell up, "Liar."
Later that night Nudge started blabbering. I tuned her out. I heard someone snap there fingers and jumped. I looked at the person. It was Nudge.
"Hey, Tara wants you to play the piano for her," she said.
I got up and started screwing around on the keys. I lapsed into Secrets by One Republic. I sang to. No one but Tara and the other mutants have ever heard me sing, to my knowledge at least.
I need another story
Something to get off my chest
My life gets kinda' boring
Need something that I can confess
'Til all my sleeves are stained red
From all the truth that I've said
Come by it honestly I swear
Thought you saw me wink, no
I've been on the brink, so
Tell me what you want to hear
Something that will light those ears
Sick of all the insincere
So I'm gonna give all my secrets away
This time, don't need another perfect lie
Don't care if critics ever jump in line
I'm gonna give all my secrets away
My God, amazing how we got this far
It's like we're chasing all those stars
Who's driving shiny big black cars
And everyday I see the news
All the problems that we could solve
And when a situation rises
Just write it into an album
Send it straight to gold
But I don't really like my flow, no, so
Tell me what you want to hear
Something that will light those ears
Sick of all the insincere
So I'm gonna give all my secrets away
This time, don't need another perfect lie
Don't care if critics ever jump in line
I'm gonna give all my secrets away
Oh, got no reason, got no shame
Got no family I can blame
Just don't let me disappear
I'ma tell you everything
Tell me what you want to hear
Something that will light those ears
Sick of all the insincere
So I'm gonna give all my secrets away
This time, don't need another perfect lie
Don't care if critics ever jump in line
I'm gonna give all my secrets away
Tell me what you want to hear
Something that will light those ears
Sick of all the insincere
So I'm gonna give all my secrets away
This time, don't need another perfect lie
Don't care if critics ever jump in line
I'm gonna give all my secrets away
All my secrets away, all my secrets away
When I finished I heard nothing. I went up to my room and went for a fly. I can't believe I did that. I just SANG in front of my family. I don't even sing for Josh or Mom. Why did I sing for them? Oh, yeah. Tara wanted me to. I would do anything for Tara. She is my best (read: only) friend. I know why it was silent. I was either terrible or really good. I am personally terrible. I don't think I am very good at anything music related. I always see where I need to improve. Where things would be better if I pushed. Nothing that I do is ever good enough for me. Then I felt something on my cheek that pulled me away from my thoughts. I realized that, for the first time in my life, I was crying. I had never shed a single tear after I was old enough to talk. It became a thing. I didn't cry, or show any emotion outside of anger or irritation.
I couldn't believe it. I, Cassie Jessica Ride, was crying for the first time in my life.
Tara POV
I was blown away by Cassie's performance. It was amazing. I could tell the others felt the same way. As far as I can gather, Mom and Josh never knew she could play any instrument outside of guitar and they certainly didn't know that she sang. She listened to the silence for a moment and then ran upstairs. I stared after her and saw something. Tears. There were tears streaming down Cassie's face. She was upset. I could tell. She thought that she was terrible. I heard the soft sound of her wings snapping out and the powerful downstroke that starts a flight. I ran up to our room followed by Mom. I don't know who else followed. I went after her. She was a good ways ahead.
Mom, why did you follow me? I ask.
I figured you knew why Cassie took off, she thought to me.
She didn't know about the tears. About the pain that Cassie has been locking in her heart for years. The pain that must have finally overflowed. The pain that was overflowed because she never feels good enough as a musician. The pain because of a few moments of silence. The pain that Cassie had hidden and covered with the violent acts in her past. The pain that, until tonight, no one but me had known existed. The pain of an outcast.
I sped up and caught up with her I flew her down to a place I though she could let it all out without being disturbed. We were both in black so it would be hard to spot us. We landed and she started crying. I don't know how long we were there but it was long enough for Angel to eventually find us. She looked at Cassie with wide eyes. When everyone else caught up they did too. They had never known the pain that she suffered. The pain she was put through everyday at school. The pain that she suffers from not feeling good enough for anyone. Mom approached her tentatively.
"Cassie," she started, "are you alright?"
Cassie looked up. She saw the others and took off. She didn't want to look weak. She never wanted anyone but me to know how weak her walls truly were. How broken she was inside. How she hid all of the broken walls behind a strong wall of anger. She was gone and it took awhile for me to find her. I turned to Mom, "Let me handle this. She trusts me."
"What do you mean? She trusts me too," she said.
"Not fully though. She almost never allows someone to earn her full trust. I am the only one so far," I said to her. I swooped down and tried to calm her down. She was so broken and now it all showed. The sadness, the rejection, the hatred, everything she had ever locked away came out. She was so weak in that time that I couldn't believe this was the same girl who tried to keep me safe from the test of the School. But I knew that this was just who she really was. The girl who never felt like she had a shoulder to cry on. The girl who needed someone now more than ever. The girl who needed someone she could trust and never had that. She had never trusted anyone. She never felt safe. Like someone was always watching her and if she trusted someone, they would betray her. Even her own mother. She had found someone to trust though, and now that she had, she felt like her walls were down. Her soul was complete chaos. I couldn't believe it. She was so weak.
She finally calmed down and ended up falling asleep. I fell asleep beside her.
We woke up to the light of the morning sun. We had school today and would likely be late. I didn't care. Cassie looked better than she had in the time I had known her. She looked more confident, less broken. She felt like she could breathe freely now. She wasn't hiding anything now. She was completely new. She was still violent, but that was to be expected. She had been violent her whole her life, she couldn't change that overnight. But she was feeling like she was safe and could be herself. At least, a little more than before what happened last night. We flew home and were assaulted by Nudge's questions, "Are you okay Cassie? I didn't think it was possible for you to cry. You're almost like Fang, except more violent. I couldn't believe it. You seem different though…" she trailed off before anyone had to cover her mouth. Cassie's eyes widened a moment and then I felt her walls rebuild.
You don't have to protect yourself with them. They are your family. She is concerned. You need to open up a little more. These people care about you Cassie. You will always be able to be honest with them. I thought to her.
Okay, I need to know who cried during that chapter, I was crying while typing it. See, Cassie really has a soft side. I told you she had a good side. That includes a soft side. I'll try to update soon.