Disaster Strikes pt1

Hello Readers!

I friggin love this story! Don't worry, I'm not giving up on it, and work on it everyday. Just the editing process becomes a bit slow once you get further into the story. Thus, the updates are a bit slower.

Disclaimer: This Disclaimer is Bold AND Underlined. I don't own Durarara!

4 minutes.

Izaya Orihara NEEDED to get into the theater and stop the movie in about that much time. Unfortunately, there was no time to do some hacking fix, so he NEEDED to physically break the theater's main computer. As long as there was no interference tho-

"IZAYA-KUUUUUUN!"

And perfect, his arch enemy comes to mess with him. A large heavy object of some sort flew in his direction. But he could use this.

"Shizu-chan… Uh. I'll deal with you later, but first, you need to listen to me. My assistant accidentally hacked into the theater computer, and, well, in about 3 minutes, our DRRR love song will be played in all its glory in front of the packed crowd."

The monster froze for a few seconds and glared at him. But he snapped out of it immediately, and ran up to the building where he stood. Izaya was relieved,

"So you're going to help me stop it?"
"Nope."
"Huh!? But, But, a hundred or so lovers are going to listen to you sing! Your high school voice!"
"Well, if you didn't remember, Izaya-kun. I sound awesome in that song. You, well, don't"
"Please Shizu-chan! It's actually a very embarrassing video with me and Namie-san dancing half nude in it."

A confused silence filled the air for a second. The bodyguard then fell on the floor in a fit of laughter.
"Then that's even better. I assume that you won't want to stay in this city too long then! Maybe you should leave the country while you're at it."

This was hopeless. He would have to stop the video himself. Izaya jumped off the building and ran straight into the theater. He faintly heard the monster run after him.

"Whoa Whoa flea! I'm not gonna just let you escape your embarrassment! IZAYAAAAAAA!"

One more minute till the movie. The lights in the theater had already gone out, and some random commercials were playing on the screen. Shinra felt good about this. Nobody would now look at Celty's strange outfit. The loud couple in front of them (consisting of weirdoes named Isaac and Miria) was loud and annoying, but at least they weren't causing violence. The movie should start any second now.

Suddenly a dark shadow flew across his peripheral vision. As the doctor wondered what could have happened, he noticed that his girlfriend was trembling. Was she scared? Angry? Crying again?

His question was answered the next moment as the yell of "IZAYAAAAAA" filled the room, and a bartender suited monster pinned the dark object onto the ground. Shit. The Dullahan had snapped. It seemed that the shadows around him were slowly forming into a scythe…

The movie started as "I&N productions" flashed across the screen. Funny. Most of Kasuka's movies were made by Varner Bros Japan. And what was I&N? Then a familiar (and unbelievably terrible) guitar solo filled the room. A green shirted man yelled in pain somewhere in front of him. The bartender suited man was laughing. The dark object beneath him was crying.

The image shifted to a large windows overlooking Shinjuku. The camera then panned to reveal a large office. As Kadota's voice started to sing, Namie Yagiri flew into the frame, wearing a two tone green bikini and dancing rather poorly to the music. The crowd roared in laughter. As the music switched to Shinra's singing, a man in Hawaii themed swimming trunks jumped into the frame as well. But, was that Izaya!?

The doctor fell on the floor laughing, as he watched the cool "god of Ikebukuro" move his pale lanky body in a complete lack of rhythm. This film made absolutely no sense, and still almost killed him with hilarity. However, his glee was short lived as the image and the music went out with a huge explosion of sparks. A smell of short circuited computer capacitors filled the air.

Shinra turned to tell his girlfriend the background of the song, but was surprised to find that she wasn't there.

As he looked around frantically to find either of them, a man in a bartender suit placed his hand on the doctor's shoulder. Wheeling around, Shinra expected to see Shizuo, but was disappointed to see that it was that Isaac weirdo. For some reason, he and his partner were crying profusely. He questioned them.

"Umm…. Can I help you?"

However, they only responded by crying some more and saying:
"Don't worry brotha! We'll help you through! Just relax okay!"
"Isaac and I will definitely solve it for you so… so… don't worry!"

"Uh. Why?"

"Don't worry! We know! We saw everything!"
"We saw your girlfriend leave you once your voice cut in that video!"

Dang. These idiots have a good eye (and ears). They'd make great thieves. But where was Celty?

"So… So... Don't kill yourself okay?"
"Come with us! We'll cheer you up!"

With that, the couple (ignoring everything the doctor had to say) grabbed him and led him to their place.

In the northwest corner of Ikebukuro, there was an empty parking complex. Nobody wanted to park here, much less on the top level, as the rates were outrageous, and there were no good places around. However, two people lay depressed in the center, unable to speak a single word.

Izaya Orihara stared blankly at some sparrows fighting in the air. Was he depressed or embarrassed? He didn't know. His pride and reputation were ruined. The coolness factor was gone. Not to mention that he had to pay for $6900 of damages to the theater. Jeez, couldn't they have bought at least $100 better equipment!?

Suddenly, he tensed up with realization. He was no longer the god of Ikebukuro, no longer the king of the chessboard. He was merely on the level of the pawn.

His hands started to tremble as he remembered an old thought. Kings were limited in what they could do. All they did was run away. They acted large, but were only capable of motions on the level of the lowest pawn. And even then, only to run away, and never to attack.

Izaya stood up. He was now a pawn. Unlike kings, pawns could take risks. Pawns could take large steps forward, leaps of faith. This place was within walking distance to Sunshine 60 right?

"Namie-san…"

Shoot. Shoot. Shoot.

Shizuo Heiwajima was having a terrible day. In the past 24 hours he had… aaaah too much. But that was only the small parts. Now he had an Irish death goddess or something like that after his life. He dashed with all he had through the streets as her scythe crashed down just next to his ankles.

Just then, the bodyguard found a convenient vending machine sitting in the corner. Picking it up frantically, he threw it at the shadowy headless thing chasing him. It was effective. It hit the Dullahan square on the chest, crushing her, and stopping her progress.

Shizuo breathed a massive sigh of relief. His life was safe. Catching his breath, he decided to leave before the police (or Shinra) found him. However, he could not move for some reason.

Looking down, he noticed that his arms and legs were somehow pinned down with ropes of shadow. Ok, this was just too unfair. He looked up to find that the farie was already recovering from his blow. She stood up angrily and towered over the cowering bodyguard.

The last thing he saw was the scythe hitting his head.

Great. Now he had no money, no phone, no friends, and probably no life.

Today was a terrible day.

"C'mon Masaomi, its not THAT funny…"

Mikado and Anri watched with concern as their blond friend lay gagging with laughter on the ground. He had been laughing for at least half an hour after the (hacked?) movie had been finished.

"Hahaha! But… But… Izaya… hahaha!"

Suddenly, the student broke out in a fresh wave of glee as he pointed to something behind his two friends. His face was slowly turning purple.

The two students looked back to see Celty Sturluson in her… same clothes, shaking with anger. They hurriedly shut their blond friend up (by sitting on him and covering his mouth) and casually greeted the faerie, somehow stifling their own laughter.

"H-hey Celty-san! How ya doin'!"

However, the Dullahan seemed more interested in Masaomi, and responded,
{Tell your friend to STFU if he doesn't want know what I did to Heiwajima Shizuo}

A muffled (unwelcomed) response came from the crushed student,
"Hwhat? Did you copulate with him?"

He shut up when a scythe landed mere inches from his nose. Mikado casually attempted to change the subject.

"So what were you doing around here?"

{I was watching a movie with Shinra, but now I can't find him after I dealt with Shizuo.}

Masaomi let out a suggestive whistle which resulted in a hunting boot being jabbed up his ribs. Anri responded, completely unfazed.

"Is he supposed to wait for you somewhere?"
{Well… no. I sort of ran off spontaneously in anger, so…}

A pained, yet smug voice leaked out of Masaomi again,
"Well… What if he found out that you cheated on him, and now he's with another gir- ughnasi"

{Does he ever learn?}
The Dullahan asked as she (and the other two) stomped mercilessly on Kida's face.

However, their awkward conversation was cut off as Morisuke's gang approached them. The leader jeered,

"Hey hey hey! What are you three doing with our leader huuuhh!? Could it be? Are you the DOLLARS?"

The Dullahan was in no mood to negotiate, {Have you heard of the Red Gloves?}

That day, the hospitals of Ikebukuro were very busy.

To Be Continued.

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