Chapter 7: Can't smile without you

Despite the evening cheer due to Hiccup's oratory defence of Hellboy, the mood taken on by the Big Four, the two Guardians, and the rest of the BPRD was a subdued one as they returned to headquarters yet again. After years of Manning desperately trying to hide the existence of the Bureau for Paranormal Research and Defence from the public eye, Hellboy had finally exposed them; and the worst part of it was, the public hated and feared them now.

Manning was determinedly not talking to Hellboy all the way back in the garbage truck. He had re-confiscated a box of Cuban cigars which he had originally confiscated just to convince Hellboy not to do anything too conspicuous. He had even littered the inside of the van with photos of Hellboy in different parts of New York, even one which he posed for, almost as a guilt-trip. In addition to this, he had placed a photo of his head with bullet-holes in it(Hellboy had been using it for target practice) next to the window as a warning. Every now and then, loud sucking noises could be heard from the front of the truck(clearly Manning was busy trying to eat his antacid lolly and relax his nerves).

The rest of the group were busy trying to entertain themselves during the wait. Hiccup and Astrid were busy rummaging through the fish they'd bought from the Troll Market salesman(fortunately, he didn't have any eels). Jack idly conjured a snowball and starting ricocheting it around the truck, whilst Bunny tried to intercept it with a boomerang. Merida and Rapunzel were seated alongside Abe and Nuala, engaging in friendly conversation, whilst Flynn and Tooth were looking over the safely-tranquillized Mr. Wink. Flynn eyed up the Cave-Troll's huge muscles and fierce tusks, almost in frightened awe, whilst Tooth looked inside his mouth at his dirty yellow teeth(stifling a gag as she did so). Maximus crunched through a basket full of juicy green apples whilst Stormfly allowed Pascal to run around over her head, eagerly changing colour to fit in with her scales.

It came as a welcome relief to the group when they finally reached the BPRD and could exit the van. Manning finally came out of his stern air of disapproval and formally welcomed the two newcomers(Bunny and Nuala) to the building.

"And over here," he said, showing them through the relics archive, "is where we keep anything that was obtained during and after the Second World War." He indicated the yellow and black spearhead(the Spear of Longinus, as the Big Four had learned four years earlier, during their own first visit).

"Very smart, mate," Bunny remarked, as his gaze was drawn to a selection of five rounded, smooth-polished orange stones. "What are these things?"

"Oh, those?" Manning laughed and pointed at the stones. "These are our crown jewels, the five Sankara Stones. Said to be given to a wise man by an Indian god, they hold the key to fortune and glory. Or, in other words, agricultural fertility. The village they used to belong to never went hungry for as long as they had the stones."

"And the Nazis tried to steal them?" Bunny guessed.

Jack sniggered at this point. "No, Bunny, not the Nazis, the Thuggees. Have you never watched Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom?"

Bunny rolled his green eyes. "Nazis, Thuggees- they're both crazy, selfish humans. What's the difference?"

"A great deal of difference, rabbit-boy," Flynn then darkly murmured. It was then that Jack remembered how Flynn, too, had been deeply affected by the Nazis back in Russia; he was appalled at the fact that fellow Germans could resort to such levels of cruelty.

Rapunzel nodded, a faint tear rolling from her eye at this point. Fortunately, Manning quickly interrupted by pointing out the next room they'd entered; the monster enclosure.

"And this is where we keep anything…dangerous," Manning finished uncomfortably, indicating the occupants of two solid metal paddocks.

One of the occupants was a massive burly monster with greyish purple skin coated in hard bumps. It had four eyes with silver irises and two fleshy flaps on both sides of its mouth, as well as a pair of tendrils over its shoulders like hair. It was currently smashing its knuckles against the walls and bellowing. The other occupant was something huge and orange with many jointed legs and thrashing tendrils, a big screeching invertebrate.

"Bunyip, eh?" Bunny chuckled, admiring the burly monster. "Nice. Been quite some time since I've seen of these."

"Where have you seen them, Bunny?" Jack asked.

"Down under, where else?" Bunny breezed over. "I feel sorry for the big lad here(he pointed to Mr. Wink) if he's got to spend the night with that monstrosity."

"Oh, we're not putting the troll in there," Manning replied. "First he needs to shrug off the tranquilizers, so until then, we'll put him in the research chamber. If he's still attacking us afterwards, then we'll put him in the paddock."

"Right, now that we know where everything is, can we go our separate ways please, Manning?" Liz asked, pointing out the bleeding cut on her boyfriend's cheek.

"Right, sure thing," Manning agreed. "And if, your Highness(he turned to Nuala), you should need anything at any point, please don't hesitate to ask."

Nuala nodded, then she walked off in the direction of the library. Abe followed her, along with Merida. Meanwhile, Rapunzel and Flynn walked off to Hellboy's room along with Liz.

The big solid metal doors were still somewhat askew from when Hellboy and Liz had had a dispute and Liz released enough firepower to blow the doors off their hinges and send Hellboy backwards through the corridor. The dispute had been over Hellboy cluttering the whole room with his music equipment everywhere; even the same 8-pack, to which Hellboy had protested, "It's Al Green! You can't listen to Al Green on a CD! Eight-track was fashionable, anyway." He'd even left Liz' toothbrush in the cat food, much to Jack's amusement and Liz' disgust(she had pinched the Guardian's ears thoroughly afterwards for laughing at her expense).

Back inside the room, Hellboy sat on the foot of his bed, coated with straw and cats to make him feel more at home. He took off his shirt to help him relax more, whilst his numerous TVs were on at the same time. One of them was broadcasting a report on the BPRD and its "promotion of inter-species marriage"; another one was showing the film The Bride of Frankenstein.

Liz stood up on a block to dab at her boyfriend's cheek with a wet wipe.

"Ow!" Hellboy said instinctively.

Liz glared at him. "I didn't touch you yet."

Hellboy relaxed again, but when Liz leaned forward to touch him, he winced again. Liz' sharp look prompted him to stop. After the blood had been wiped away, Rapunzel then pressed her hair against Hellboy's cheek and healed the wound.

"You did a good job out there, big guy," Eugene said to Hellboy, patting him on the left shoulder.

Hellboy looked back at him in a low way. "Then tell me," he asked, "Why don't I feel so good?"

All three people looked at him confusedly.

"I mean," Hellboy continued, "If it hadn't been for you, Rapunzel, I might have killed that Forest God? And for what? The public don't even like me. I mean, they're afraid of me. What can we do with that?"

Rapunzel shook her head sadly. "However hard you try, Hellboy, some people's minds can't be changed. I imagine quite a few people would be scared of me if they knew what my hair can do. They fear anything they don't understand."

"A bit like that guy over there," Eugene agreed, pointing into the TV towards Frankenstein's Monster.

Liz then gently stepped down from her box and spoke to the friendly demon. "I don't want you to freak out, Red," she said gently. "But I'm gonna…leave for a little bit."

Rapunzel looked at her in shock. "Liz, you're not leaving the Bureau again, are you? The last time you said something like that, it lead to a psychiatric centre being burnt down."

Hellboy winced. He hated to be reminded of how, after his failure to convince Liz to return to the BPRD, Rasputin manipulated her into losing control of her pyrokinesis and setting fire to her erstwhile home.

Liz shook her head. "I'm not leaving the BPRD, Rapunzel. I'm just…moving out of this room. I need time alone. Time to think."

"About what?" Hellboy softly protested. "Can't you do your thinking here? Look, I'll be really quiet. I'll even get rid of the cats."

It was a sheer sign of desperation from Hellboy now. He had once sworn that he would gladly give up his own life to save Liz'. She meant everything to him, and the rest of the Big Four were well aware of it.

Liz looked up at her boyfriend very seriously. "Red, why are you with me?" she asked.

She climbed on top of the box again so she was now looking down to him. "Do you need everyone in the world to like you? Hmm? Everyone? Or are we enough?" She gestured to the royal couple of Corona as representative of the whole Four. "Just think about it."

And with a gentle kiss to his head, Liz walked out of Hellboy's room. The demon lowered his head sadly, and Rapunzel and Eugene placed comforting hands on his shoulders as he shed tears softly.

Meanwhile, back in the library, Abe Sapien had taken off his breathing apparatus suit to relax whilst he and Merida walked along the upper floors, examining the map Nuala had bought from the Troll Market merchant.

"What a curious device," Abe murmured as he examined the blank sheet of cloth. "It's got absolutely no coordinates on it of any kind."

"That's nae help to us, then," Merida grumbled. "We cannae find th' Golden Army if we dinnae know where it is."

"Be patient, Merida," Abe replied. "The map may contain some hidden clue to the Army's resting place. Elves are very subtle people."

Merida quietly accepted this, before she then heard a voice from downstairs, reciting poetry.

"Be near me when my light is low,

when the blood creeps, and the nerves prick

and tingle: and the heart is sick

and all the wheels of Being slow."

It was Nuala, of course. As she read, Abe produced contact lenses and slipped them onto his large blue eyes. Merida chuckled; ever since they had returned to the BPRD, Abe seemed utterly besotted with the Elven princess. She was happy for both her friends. They deserved each other.

Nuala continued,

"Be near me when the sensuous frame

Is rack'd with pangs that conquer trust,

And time, a maniac…"

"Tennyson, 'In Memoriam'," Abe interrupted. "A beautiful poem."

He then looked apologetically down at Nuala. "Forgive me, your highness. I didn't mean to startle you."

"No, no, I borrowed this book," Nuala replied. "I hope you won't mind."

"O' course we don't," Merida replied. "This is yer home now, Nuala. Ye're safe here."

Nuala shook her head. "My brother will find me, Merida. He always does."

"How could he?" Hiccup asked, as he entered the library in his normal clothes. Toothless was walking behind him, grinning gummily at Nuala.

Hiccup continued, "I mean, from what Abe's told me, the BPRD's location is a highly-guarded secret."

Nuala turned to him and responded, "Yes, but I know it now, Master Hiccup, which means that he does too, thanks to the Banna na Anamacha."

"Oh, yeah, the Bond of Souls," Hiccup nodded. "Your Highness, how long have you and Nuada shared that bond, again?"

"For all my life," Nuala replied. "Even as children, that link has bound us, one to the other. It's something I cannot explain."

"There's no need to explain," Hiccup replied, before then calling Toothless over. "I don't believe you were ever properly introduced. Princess Nuala, this is my dragon, Toothless."

"How do you do?" Nuala shook the dragon's front paw. He growled softly in response, then starting licking her hand repeatedly, bathing it in spit.

"Stop that, man," Hiccup said, pinching Toothless' ear gently. "You know that doesn't wash out."

Toothless made a loud warbling noise that was clearly the dragon equivalent of laughter.

Nuala laughed. "Please, don't worry about it." She then produced a napkin and started wiping the spit off with great ease. "I'm sorry about attacking you earlier, Master Hiccup, but my people did not have the best relationships with Vikings. The last time we met, centuries ago, they killed countless elves and dragons."

"Yeah, I know what that's like," Hiccup agreed. "But before I came here, my people back on Berk had managed to make peace with the dragons, mainly thanks to me." He then pointed to his prosthetic foot. "I lost one of my legs in the process, but who cares? At least him and me are even now."

Nuala stroked Toothless behind one ear. "I'm glad to hear of it." Next, Abe came down the staircase and Nuala spoke to him. "You look different, Master Sapien."

Abe frowned. "Is it my hair?"

Merida sniggered. Abe didn't have any hair to begin with. Scales, perhaps, but not hair.

"No, it's your eyes," Nuala replied. "I can see your eyes."

Abe chuckled. "I know. I'm just trying a new look. All thanks to the wonders of contact lenses."

Merida then slid down the staircase on her backside. "We were just lookin' at yer map, Nuala," she explained. "It doesnae have any co-ordinates at all."

"Perhaps there's a watermark?" Hiccup suggested.

Nuala smiled, though her attention was mainly on Abe. "You were very brave, vouching for me. How do you know I'm not the enemy, wanting you to lead me here?"

Abe replied, "I just know it from what you're saying, just now. Call it intuition- or maybe a link? Normally I'm able to read people like this quite quickly, but…I've never met anyone quite like you."

Merida and Nuala smiled at Abe's heartfelt compliment.

"Nor I like you," Nuala returned one of her own. She slowly began to walk off, and Merida followed her.

"Good night, Abraham," Nuala called back to him, and for once the psychic piscine humanoid seemed at a loss for words.

"Good night, princess-your Highness- your Majesty, your-Ma'am," he finished awkwardly. Hiccup laughed softly and patted his friend on the back, whilst Merida and Nuala continued walking off.

"Ma'am?" Hiccup murmured incredulously as soon as the girls were out of earshot.

"Ye like Abe, don't ye?" Merida whispered to Nuala as soon as they couldn't hear the boys any longer.

"What are you talking about?" the Elf asked.

Merida laughed. "Ye needn't hide it from me, Nuala. I'm yer friend. I'm bound tae ken ye fancy him."

Nuala laughed also. "Alright, I…I do fancy him a bit."

Merida grinned warmly and pulled her fellow princess into a friendly hug. "Just wait until we tell everyone else!"

Elsewhere, Hellboy was busy relaxing after a shower. He had put his trousers and shoes back on, and was busy putting his towel back in the locker room. Alongside him was Bunny, looking very nonchalant and daring with a towel wrapped around his shoulders. Bunny wasn't wearing any clothes, since being a furry animal, he didn't need them. Hellboy had been spending time with the Guardian to try and form a friendship with him.

Bunny cheerfully towelled his head, singing "Waltzing Matilda" to himself. Hellboy reached into his locker to produce an eight-pack of beer cans. And then the last person that he wanted to speak to just then came in to open his own locker. It was Dr. Krauss.

"Gute nacht, Agent Hellboy," the ectoplasmic German said. Ignoring the dirty look Hellboy shot him, he then turned to Bunny and added, "Yes, I'm still eating Smarties, Herr Bunnymund."

Then he produced a tube of Smarties from inside his own locker and cracked it open. Then a small circular valve opened beneath his chin, and he tipped his helmet back to drop one Smartie down the valve, almost as if swallowing it. Sure enough, Hellboy then heard the sound of crunching from inside Johann's helmet a few minutes later. In spite of his foul temper towards the man, Hellboy was feeling curious.

"Hey, Dr. Krauss?" he asked. "How is it that, although you're made completely of ectoplasm, you can still eat food?"

"A good qvestion, Agent Hellboy," Krauss replied cheerily. "Ze answer is I can still hold a physical form. As such, I can still use my tees and my throat. But in order to get ze food into my mouth vizzout releasing any ectoplasm, I open vone end of ze little valve zere(he pointed to the valve), and let ze food slide down zat. Ven it reaches ze other end, I close ze front end, open ze back end, and zere you are!"

He ate a few more Smarties in this manner.

"But then what do you do if you need to use the toilet?" Hellboy asked.

Krauss stopped abruptly. "Please trust me ven I say zat you don't vant to know ze answer to zat, Agent Hellboy," was all he said.

There was a moment's awkward silence as Hellboy returned to cracking open one of his beer cans. Jack then floated into the locker room and took a seat next to Bunny to shake some soil from the Forest God fight out of his hoody.

Krauss nodded upon seeing the winter spirit. "Ah, zere you are, Agent Frost!" he said.

"Call me Jack, please," Jack replied, whilst quietly sprinkling ice on Bunny's shoulder. Bunny abruptly thwacked him across the head upon noticing his behaviour.

Krauss then continued, "Look, Agents, I know zat you both don't like me, but I could take avay your badges."

"Good luck taking away Frostbite's badge," Bunny laughed. "He's the spirit of all naughtiness, ain't ya?"

Jack nodded and accepted a hair-ruffle from Bunny.

"And for the record, I don't have a badge," Hellboy added. "I kept asking, though."

"I did as well," Jack encouraged his friend.

Krauss was not finished yet, though. "Over ze folloving series of days, you vill learn to obey me, follow protocol and stay fock-yoosed at all times!"

Jack got up in surprise at that moment. "Did you just swear, Dr. Krauss?" he asked incredulously. "That's hardly following protocol."

"He's not swearing, ya daft show-pony," Bunny remarked dryly. "He's just saying the word 'focused'. Which is what he wants you two knock-offs to be."

"Well, with your accent, I wouldn't use the word 'focused' too often," Hellboy jibed at Krauss.

Krauss sternly replied, "I knew Professor Trezzor Bruttenholm, young man."

Hellboy's shoulders tensed, as did Jack's. Even though it had been four years since his adoptive father was killed, the topic of Professor Broom was still a touchy one for Hellboy. Jack knew his pain all too well; he had watched Rasputin and Karl Kroenen kill Bruttenholm himself, and had felt all too happy to take vengeance on the psychopathic sword-wielding murderer.

"You didn't know Professor Broom," Hellboy said sharply, trying to indicate that as far as he was concerned, the conversation had gone far enough.

Krauss replied instantly, "Yes I did! After ze accident vhich reduced my body to ectoplasm…"

"Shut up, shut up," Hellboy dismissed irritably with a wave of his hand.

"Mr. Krauss, I really don't think you should continue with this," Jack said, his previous mischief and bonhomie giving way to concern.

But the ectoplasmic man continued regardless, "He designed zis containment suit for me to better control my capabilities. He vas truly a vonderful man." He then sharply returned to the subject of Hellboy. "Yet even zen, he vas vorried about your future, young man. He said to me…"

"Hey, Gas-Bag, stop it!" Hellboy said, his tone as warning as the red finger he pointed at Johann's glass face. "Right now." It was clear to Jack that Hellboy's temper was reaching danger level.

But Krauss refused to take the hint. "Or vot?" he retorted. "Are you trying to threaten me? Because I zink I can take you."

Hellboy looked up at him with fierce scepticism. "Excuse me?" he asked.

"You heard vot I said."

Hellboy walked slowly over to Krauss. "I couldn't hear you from all the way over there," he said, with an intimidatingly meaningless waving finger.

"I can take you, because you have vone fatal flaw," Krauss continued, not in anyway threatened by the imposing demon's being so close to him.

"Oh, I wanna hear about it," Hellboy said with an air of forced calm.

"No, you don't," Krauss chuckled. "You can't take criticism."

"Try me out," Hellboy insisted, but Krauss was not going to answer him so freely.

"Can't take it," he taunted, whilst poking Hellboy in the chest.

This was a step too far in Hellboy's opinion. Getting right into Krauss' face, he shouted at him, "Just tell me, Gas-Bag! WHAT'S MY FLAW?!"

Krauss remained as robotically composed as ever as he replied, "Ze flaw zat you are displaying now! Your temper! It gets ze best of you. Makes you veak. Makes you vulnerable-"

CRACK!

Hellboy's stone fist shot out and hit Johann right in the glass of his helmet, breaking it open like a stone through a window. Jack shouted and jumped backwards in alarm, whilst Bunny dug a hole in the floor and retreated into it, disturbed by this display of violent behaviour on Hellboy's part.

Even Hellboy himself seemed shocked by the consequences of his actions. "Oh, poop," he cursed, as Johann Krauss staggered forwards, choking and gasping, while dense white gas poured out of his helmet and he sunk to his knees, his containment suit slowly deflating like a punctured balloon.

"Johann?" Hellboy called. "Johann? Hey, Johann? Johann?" but the white gas had already seeped underneath the floor of the lockers.

Hellboy glanced around uneasily. "Come on, pal, hang in there, will ya?" he said desperately. Receiving no reply, he sighed under his breath and leaned against the lockers. He then took a sip from his beer, but then something surprising happened.

With a loud cry of "HAIYA!" a locker door swung open and smacked his face.

"Ow!" Hellboy incredulously said, just before a second locker door opened and smacked his head from behind. And then, in quick succession, the whole chain of locker doors started opening and slamming into different parts of his body, but one thing Jack notice was that each opening door had a stream of white gas behind it. Krauss was somehow spreading out his essence and turning the very room into a weapon to use against Hellboy.

Pushed backwards and forwards by the doors, Hellboy ended up spilling all his beer and finally sank to his knees. And then the attack was rounded off with a final door slamming into his face with enough strength to leave an impression in the metal. Hellboy got up unsteadily, then tried to take a sip of his beer again, only to find he'd spilled it, whereupon he simply dropped the can to the floor disappointedly.

Immediately, a stream of white gas poured out from beneath the locker and rose upwards in the form of a vaguely human shape. It had no facial characteristics or hair colour(or even clothes for that matter), but from what Jack could tell, it must be Johann Krauss as he normally looked outside of his suit. He was almost like a walking shape of mist.

"Zere ve are!" Krauss remarked very cheerfully, none the worse for having been forcibly expelled from his own suit. "Your temper, it makes you bad. Makes you overconfident. You must learn to control it, Agent Hellboy, before it controls you."

He next turned to look at Jack. "As for you, Agent Frost, I have no furzer complaints, but right now, I vill go elsevhere to finish my Smarties. Tchus." And he floated off very jauntily, singing a German song under his breath and leaving his suit behind as he went off to relax elsewhere.

Hellboy then called Krauss a very inventive insult which Jack made a note of for further use, but for the sake of not putting off any younger readers of this story, we'll just translate it as a "pompous bag of glass and gas". Bunnymund just shook his head and went back to painting eggs in his room.

Later on, having put his t-shirt back on, Hellboy walked off with Jack to visit the library and check in on Abe. As they reached the main doors, Jack made out a faint noise and pressed his head against the wood, trying to listen in.

Behind the door, the sound of soft rock music was playing; not something that you'd expect Abe, who mainly preferred classical music, to be listening to. The pair quickly entered, only to find that there was now classical music playing on the loudspeakers instead. Abe was seated alongside Hiccup on a luxury sofa, whilst Toothless sat in front of his master, accepting a full joint of pork which he ate slowly.

"Oh, hello, Red. You and Jack are up late," Abe said very innocently, as though trying to hide what he'd been listening to before he came in.

"Same to you, Abe," Jack returned. "What were you just listening to then?"

"Oh, uh, Vivaldi," Abe replied. "Il cimento dell'armonia."

"You liar, Abe," Hiccup teased from his own seat. "They could hear you changing records just before they came in."

"What's that?" Hellboy asked, pointing to something in Abe's webbed hands.

Abe revealed the item. "Oh, this? It's a remote control, Red." But Hellboy kept looking at him, so he revealed the second item he was holding. "This is…a CD. It's a CD."

Jack walked over to examine the CD cover. "Popular Love Songs," he read aloud. "Why are you listening to this, Abe?"

Hellboy buffeted him gently. "Isn't it obvious, Snowcone?" he asked. "Our fishy friend here has fallen in love with the Princess."

"Which one?" Jack frowned. "We've got three different princesses here in the BPRD, one of them's already got a boyfriend."

Hiccup rolled his eyes. "We're talking about Nuala, Jack. Who else would we be talking about?"

"She's like me," Abe sighed gently. "A creature of an ancient time. Unique and beautiful."

"You need to get out more," Hellboy replied.

"Apart from her father, Balor, she's alone in the world. I want to help her. I need to care for her." The psychic piscine was very sensitive in his comments.

"You're in love. Have a beer," Hellboy cracked open one of his own cans and offered it to Abe.

"No, seriously, Red, my body's a temple," his friend protested.

"Well, now it's an amusement park," was the returned jibe.

"No, no, no, the glandular balance…"

"Just shut up and drink it, would ya?" Abe sighed and accepted the drink. Hellboy then produced a second metal can and broke it open for Hiccup.

"Red, I've told you before, I don't drink beer," the Viking protested.

"This ain't beer, kid," Hellboy chuckled, before then wafting the can under Hiccup's nose. Through the open neck, Hiccup could make out that the drink in question was dense, foamy and yellowish-white, and smelt suspiciously of…

"Hellboy," Hiccup began incredulously, "Is this drinks can full of…Yaknog?"

"Home-made, buddy," Hellboy agreed.

Abe would have raised his eyebrows if he had any. "Red, you've never even been to Denmark. How did you know how to make an ancient Viking recipe jealously guarded for years?"

"Simple," Hellboy replied. "I asked Hic's girlfriend how she makes that brew, and she wrote it down for me. Then I just followed the instructions."

Hiccup felt a bit uneasy at this point. "You know, Red, Astrid's Yaknog recipes are seriously out-of-date, even for a Viking in the modern world, so this might taste a little disgus…MMMMPH!"

Hellboy cut him off by getting one hand behind his head and the other hand poured a canful of Yaknog froth down his throat. Hiccup struggled for a few moments, but then slumped into a more relaxed posture, grinning eagerly.

"Whoa, that tastes far better than I thought it would!" Hiccup asked. "Why does your Yaknog taste so nice, Hellboy?"

His large red friend fixed them a roguish smirk. "Just 'cos I'm a demon doesn't mean I'm an awful cook, dragon boy. Now then, Abe, what track were you listening to?"

They were back to the topic of Abe's love life again. "Track eight," he replied clumsily, still busy savouring his drink.

Hellboy read off the back of the CD. "Can't…Smile…Without…You," he finished. "I'm gonna need a drink too."

"What is that song?" Hiccup asked, since the most popular love-song back in Berk in his time was "The Dancing and the Dreaming."

"A guy called Barry Manilow wrote this some time ago, Hic," Jack filled in, whilst trying to get his hands on more Yaknog drink cans, but to no avail, since Toothless kept shoving him away from the drinks, clearly suspecting he might go mad if he had such an energy-rich drink. "You don't mind if I join in on this number too, do you? Only I think Abe might be having some company in the Lonely Hearts Corner tonight."

Hiccup frowned as he finished off his Yaknog. Who could Jack have developed a crush on? Certainly not Merida, one of the only two girls who were still technically "available"; the first time they'd met, Merida had threatened to fire arrows through Jack's hoody after he sprinkled frost in her hair. Then Hiccup remembered the almost admiring way in which he'd spoken of another female figure the very same night they'd first begun this whole mission…quest…thing at the Auction House, and he quickly realized…

"Jack, you sly old Arctic Fox," Hiccup sniggered. "You fancy Tooth, don't you?"

And Jack made no attempt to agree with or challenge Hiccup; he simply tucked in his feet and sat alongside his three friends and the dragon, whilst Abe prepared to turn on the music again.

"You see, Hiccup, I love this song," Abe said to him beforehand. "You see, I can't smile. Or cry. I think I have no tear ducts."

"Well, good thing the rest of us do," Hiccup joked, before the music began playing; a soft guitar intro and faint background humming. Abe began to bob his head along to the music.

"I wish Father were here now," Hellboy sighed to Jack. "He'd know what to tell you…us. The romantic crisis three."

"Tell me about it," Jack sighed. "All this time spent on making kids happy, I never once thought about how it might feel to make myself happy in life for a change. I'd be glad to even get some advice from North right now, he's had experience in these things."

Then Abe began to sing softly, counting time with his fingers:

"I can't smile without you,

I can't smile without you,

I can't laugh, and I can't sing,

I'm finding it hard to do anything."

Then Hellboy nudged Jack and the pair of them joined in with Abe on his singing; Hiccup only sung the chorus lines, due to not knowing the song as well as his friends did, whilst Toothless growled softly and rolled his large green eyes towards the ceiling. Bunch of saps, he thought, as he finished off his joint of pork.

"You see, I feel sad when you're sad,

I feel glad when you're glad,

If you only knew what I'm going through;

I just can't smile without you."

And the four friend's voices echoed throughout the whole BPRD building, as though given resonance by their passion. And wherever they were in the building, all the BPRD crew stopped and listened in. Liz, from her straw-coated bed in Hellboy's room, perked up her head upon hearing this unexpected tender poeticism from her demonic boyfriend; Rapunzel and Flynn ceased playing chess against one another in their own room to dance along to the music; Merida missed one of her archery targets as Hiccup sung a beautiful chorus line, whilst Astrid simply clutched her axe and smiled warmly.

Even Manning stopped discussing business with Krauss(who had just got the BPRD director to repair his damaged suit and re-possessed it) to admire the music. But the keenest response was that of Tooth; as soon as she heard the Guardian of Fun singing, she literally swept Bunny off his feet and went on a fluttering waltz around the chamber Manning had allotted them, full of exotic plants to make them feel more at home.

"Just listen to him sing, Bunny!" Tooth chirped passionately. "Isn't he spectacular?"

"Blimey," Bunny murmured, still in surprise at being invited to dance like this. "Never knew Frostbite had it in him."

"You came along, just like a song,

And brightened my day:

Who'd have believed you were part of a dream?

Now it all seems far away,

And now you know I can't smile without you,

I can't smile without you."

Just then, in Merida and Nuala's room, the Elf Princess, who had been hitherto enjoying the music, suddenly got to her feet and reached out one hand, psychically scanning the locality. A soft gasp was all that it took to alert her friend that something wasn't right with her. The Scottish princess ran over to place a hand on her shoulder.

"Cad é atá ann, Nuala(what is it, Nuala)?" she asked in Irish Gaelic. "Cad a fheiceann tú(what do you see)?"

"Tá sé anseo(He's here)," was the only reply the Princess of Bethmoora gave, and Merida did not even need to ask her who "he" was, for she knew by now.

Nuada.

There we are, guys. Sorry I took so long with the updates, but good stories are something you need to take time over. I think this is one of my longest updates yet, so please let me know what you think, providing it's not flames. Anyone who flames gets paid a visit by Nuada with a very sharp temper and an equally sharp spear. So until next time, rate and review!

Sammael29