AN: I suffered a system failure, so I don't have Office Word yet, so this hasn't gone through the spell check. Still, I think the site will correct every error; but if that doesn't occur, please don't mind me.

I hope you will enjoy this chapter!!! Please make sure to review! :)

Unloved

Chapter 6: Resentment

Renji was content with his performance. It had been such a joy to watch the young souls look at him in awe as he had summoned his shikai, and later, bankai. Some of the students had been free enough to approach and compliment him on his Zabimaru and the degree of power. It had given him a temporary feeling of fulfillment. Still, it hadn't been enough for him to forget about it. Memories of their first encounter, of his hatred and his parting with Rukia (although they were very good and close friends again) had the effect of acid on his numb soul.

He had to think about Rukia's child. He had to concentrate on bringing him up. Still, he counted on Ichigo's support, since he knew Ichigo's temperament, and he knew that it was in his nature to protect his child. That would for certain be his priority. If only he and Rukia could make up. Renji never dared to think how he would feel if he had been cheated. Well, he had been, when he thought better. With a dead woman, no less.

On their way back, Ukitake sighed. Renji looked at him.

"What's wrong, captain? Is everything alright?" he sincerely hoped that it wasn't the beginning of one of those asthmatic attacks Ukitake always had. It wasn't his fault Ukitake wanted to go on foot all the way back.

"Uh, no, Abarai-kun." he chuckled. "It's just...I won't hesitate. It would be the best if we talk about it now."

At this, Renji felt a strange noodle forming in his throat.

"What is it about?" he asked, a bit nervous, yet he never showed it. It seemed that the captain was about to confess his feelings or something, and that was really something that was making his stomach growl in disapproval. He always thought of Ukitake as a father figure towards Rukia and him.

"Honestly, I'm a little worried about you. You see...it's really admirable how, even after ten years, your relationship with Byakuya remained a secret." Renji looked at him in utter shock, his eyes widened. He frowned.

'Even so, it's none of his business' he thought.

"I'm the only one to know, since Byakuya told me about you two. Otherwise, I would have never guessed." he sighed again, looking at the younger shinigami. "He also told me how your falling into the river hadn't been an accident. He said that no matter how much you were strong, a true warrior (especially because you had been in the 11th squad as well), the disagreements between you two during the past three years had been the result of your attempt at suicide."

"That's not true!" he blurted out in defence. "Captain Ukitake, it's nothing like that at all!" he shook his head.

"Even if I don't want to believe in it, I think he knows you best. He was your lover. He asked me to tell you something he wouldn't be able to tell you since your bonds are cut now. I found this moment the most suitable for something he required me to tell you."

Renji wanted to say that it was none of his business now; that he didn't care. It was over, anyway. But it was in his nature to be curious. Besides, who was he to disobey his captain?

"Yes, captain? I'm listening." he said that politely, bowing.

Ukitake sighed for the third time. It was obvious that he was excited.

"He said that he hadn't wanted to demote you to the third seat because he had found you incompetent for the duty of his lieutenant. He thought that it would be the best to distance you from him, because of the 'river incident'. He thought that it would be safe for both of you. I have never seen his face when in worry. That time he came, he was so pale that I thought he was seriously ill (he looked just like me!). However, you found a better solution; to isolate yourself from him completely....Byakuya demanded your application for the lieutenant in my squad to be granted."

Renji raised his eyebrows. So Byakuya was pulling the strings all along?! A sudden fury filled his chest and he was barely containing himself from a rage outburst.

"Byakuya never says much about you two. He told me about your relationship after you two separated, in order to tell you all of this. But please, Abarai-kun, don't hate him for it. His intentions were the best, I'm sure. I don't know why you two broke up. I really don't know what's going on, but don't hate him for this."

Renji continued to walk, without a word, and Ukitake was slowly following him, unable to catch up. When he realized that his captain was panitng and unable to follow, he returned to him, bowing.

"I sincerely apologize, captain!"

Ukitake waved his hand. "It's alright. But, to tell you the truth, I did that because I really thought you were good to be my lieutenant. It's hight time to let Shiba Kaien rest in peace."

"Really?" he softened a bit.

"Of course!" Ukitake smiled honestly.

"Oh" Renji sighed in something that could be barely called relief.

Another half an hour they spent in silence.

"Abarai-kun?" Renji heard his captain call his name.

'Yes?"

"Did you...really love him?" his voice seemed lethargic.

Renji was taken aback by the question. Of course he did! If he could, he would sream it out loud. But it would be embarrasing and pointless. He bowed his head.

"I still love him and I would never hold grudges against him. If he's happy without me, it's fine with me. It has to be." he said honestly. "Why do you ask?"

"Because I have never seen such devotion in my entire life." the white-haired shinigami admitted. "I admire you two."

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About half the kilometer from the main gate, they felt a weak, unknown reiatsu. It appeared that it belonged to somebody who was injured. It was already dark, about 10pm, visibility on the minimum. Ukitake used some of his kido skills to enlighten their surroundings.

The air was heavy, Renji found himself breathless. They ran to the source of the reiatsu, discovering a seemingly lifeless body.

Both men kneeled beside the body. Reiatsu was still there, so the person must have been just unconscious. Ukitake directed the ball towards the person, illuminating a tiny, pretty face.

Renji winced at the sight. Ukitake was bewildered as well.

"...Rukia?"

"It's not her." Renji said. "It's probably Hisana's reincarnation"

"Er...What...?!" Ukitake looked at Renji in wonder.

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Renji had asked Ukitake to take care of the girl at his place, since he didn't want Rukia to meet 'Hisana'. She may miscarry, and he certainly didn't want that to happen. He explained in brief that Byakuya wanted a family with this reincarnation. All Ukitake could do at that moment was to listen to Renji's story in shock and disbelief.

The girl was resting in one of the guest rooms.

"Probably the hollow's attack." Renji said. "I guess she was able to defend herself. She should recover by tomorrow without any problem." he looked at her with a certain amount of jealousy. Everything inside him was boliing in resentment.

"I will come tomorrow to fetch her. She is to be introduced to Kuchiki Byakuya." he said harshly, for he had secretly hoped that Byakuya would never find her. "I will introduce her to him myself."

"Abarai-kun..."

"Either way, I lost, so it is only fair." he bowed and headed to the exit.

Outside, light breeze caressed his sensitive ear. It was cold. For the second, he thought it was Byakuya. When he turned around, he found it was just his childish illusion. Some dreams will never come true.

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TBC...?