Meant to Be Chapter 6
Tuesday
Bella
It was just after 6 o'clock. I was at Carlisle and Esme's house. I had put the boys' carriers on the floor in their very beautiful living room and after taking them out and handing them over to their babysitters for the evening, I started creeping out of the room again when suddenly Jason started screaming louder than he ever had before.
Imagine my surprise. My 1 year old son starts bawling his eyes out for no apparent reason just as I'm leaving to get ready for my date with Edward. I felt like the worst mother ever. Abandoning my kids with people they don't know so I can go out and enjoy myself.
Esme and Carlisle had looks of shock on their faces as well. The boys had been gurgling happily and playing with their toys just seconds before.
Since Esme was holding Jason she starting looking him over to see what was wrong. His little chubby arms were reaching out around her towards where I was standing a few feet to the side. She checked his diaper, clean, she said. He had just eaten a couple hours ago and wasn't really due for another hour at least.
Esme looked back at his face suddenly realizing that nothing was actually wrong with him, he just wanted me. It tugged at my heartstrings and made me feel awful. I stepped forward but Esme stopped me before I got very far.
"You're just going to make it worse. Go now, he'll calm down in a couple minutes and be fine for the rest of the night," she said calmly.
At my hesitation, she looked at me seriously and said, "you're going to have to do it eventually. There's nothing wrong with him. I have yours and Edward's cell phone numbers and I will call if there is actually anything wrong. I raised three babies, I know this cry."
"Ok, thank you," I rushed out of the house as she was rocking him in her arms.
I turned on the sidewalk and started the trek home as tears came to my eyes. When your kid is crying all you want to do is comfort them and let them know everything is fine. It goes against a mother's nature to walk out of the room while her baby is crying for her. I realized how important it is for children to spend time without the parents, and realize that while sometimes mommy leaves, she will always come back, because realistically, I won't always be there, they will go to daycare, and eventually school and have to understand that I won't be spending all day every day with them.
As I go back to my house the tears had stopped. I splashed some water on my face then grabbed my phone and sent a text to Rose, How is Emily doing? Is she behaving?
Less than a minute later I got my reply and breathed a sigh of relief, She's great, don't worry. The girls are having dinner now and planning to play dress up afterwards. I'll let you know if there's any issues. Enjoy your date
I felt a bit better knowing that at least one of my babies was ok for the time being. Not that I don't trust the Cullen family, because I really do to allow them to look after my children, it's a Mom's job to worry.
Putting that all aside, I plugged in my curling iron and pulled out my makeup bag to get ready.
Before I knew it there was a knock on the door.
"Hey," I said to I saw the handsome man on my porch, "come on it, I just need to grab my purse."
"Thanks, you look beautiful," he smiled.
"Oh, thank you, is this ok for the restaurant?" I asked. I had decided to go wear my black skinny jeans, a flowing deep purple top and my ankle boots with a bit of a heel on them.
"Absolutely perfect," he held his hand out to me after I had grabbed my purse and put on my black pea coat. "How was your day today? Did you have any trouble dropping the kids off?"
"Today was good. I went to the gym again this morning with the boys, then did some cooking, then cleaned the kitchen and we went for a walk since it wasn't too cold out. Rose picked Emily up from daycare and texted saying that all is going well. The boys were a different story, I took them to your parents' place around 6; I was just starting to leave when Jason suddenly started wailing louder than I'd ever heard."
"Is he okay?"
"He's fine, he didn't want me to leave I guess. There was nothing actually wrong with him. Your mom almost pushed me out the door and told me everything would be fine," I chuckled.
"Do you want to go pick them up? I don't want him to be crying because he misses you so much the whole time. And I'm sure it's not easy for you. We could get them and take them to the diner so we could have dinner," he offered. He was looking me straight in the eyes and had the sweetest look on his face. He was really concerned for my sons' wellbeing and mine as well.
"No, we should go out. It's just hard to leave them but they will get used to it I'm sure. Your mom said she would call if she needed me to come and get them. I just hope they've calmed down. I don't want to stress your parents out anymore."
He laughed and looked at me while he turned the key in the ignition, "I don't think those boys can cause any more trouble than Alice, Emmett and I did growing up. My mom is in her element, I'm sure she's just blissed out right now with those babies of yours."
"They're like angels when they're in a good mood, but you better watch out when they have a tantrum!" I told him.
"Did you want to call and see how they're doing on our way to the restaurant?" he offered.
"No, no, I'm going to focus on you for now. We'll get a call if something happens. I don't want to ruin our date," I said.
"Alright then, so, the steakhouse has this promo on Tuesday nights where they do surf and turf night. So, for one night a week you get a portion of seafood as well to go with whatever else you order and of course your sides. Does that sound ok? I didn't ask if you like seafood, but I guess you could just order the regular meal as well, without it." He looked puzzled and a bit nervous.
"Seafood is fine, Edward, you worry too much, I'll eat just about anything, I'm kind of low maintenance if you haven't already noticed," I smirked.
"Actually, I think the exact opposite, I think you are high maintenance. Such a beautiful, kind woman like you should be pampered a little bit and given attention and love, otherwise people are not realizing your greatness as a person. I think you deserve high maintenance."
My jaw dropped and I just stared at him silently for a moment. As he pulled into the parking lot, he turned to me and said, "too much?"
"Uh, no. Just surprised. No one's ever said anything like that to me before," I explained.
"I call it like I see it," he joked while sticking his tongue out at me. He opened his door and started walking around the front of the car as I was getting out. He pouted when he reached my side, "I was going to get that for you."
"Oh, it's ok. I can manage to open my own door," I told him.
"It's not so much that I don't think you can do it yourself, it's that I would enjoy doing it for you," he informed me as his hand touched my lower back, and he gave me a kiss on the top of my head. "Ready to go in?"
I was coming to understand that Edward was a very physical man, he shows his affection openly and widely through physical touch, and while endearing, it scared me a little bit that I might end up in the same situation where a man was trying to pressure me into something I don't want to do.
"Sure," I responded. We were seated quickly since Edward had made a reservation. It made me wonder if you really needed a reservation in a restaurant on a Tuesday night in a town as small as Forks, but who was I to question it.
We were seated and started looking at the menu. "Do you want some wine, or something else to drink?" Edward asked.
"Can't, breastfeeding," I replied out of habit then slapped my hand over my mouth as my eyes popped open and I looked across the table nervously. "I'm so sorry! That was way too much information!" The blush on my cheeks got darker as my embarrassment continued to consume me.
Edward burst out laughing, guffawing heartily. He calmed slightly, and looked at me to say, "Bella, you are such a breath of fresh air! Don't be embarrassed. So, no wine then?" He continued to chuckle lightly.
"I really am sorry, sometimes things just come out of my mouth, before I even realize it."
"Bella," he grabbed my hand across the table, "its fine. I thought it was funny. Don't be embarrassed, please."
I nodded slowly and looked back at the menu without letting go of his hand.
The waitress came at that point and asked for our drink orders. "I'll have water, please," I said to her.
"Diet Coke for me, thanks," Edward asked.
The waitress walked away and Edward and I started talking again.
"Did you always want to be a doctor?" I asked.
"No, actually, for the longest time I wanted to be a lawyer, especially in high school I took some law classes and absolutely loved it, and then right as I was getting ready to apply to colleges, I changed my mind and decided I wanted to be a doctor," he explained looking down at the table.
"Is there a particular reason you changed your mind?" I wondered.
"Well, I thought I wanted to be a lawyer because my grandfather and my father were both lawyers, so I figured that was what I was supposed to do. In my senior year I realized that I didn't want to spend my life in a courtroom or an office drafting lawsuits, I really wanted to help people in a more tangible way. I had a friend through high school that suffered from lymphoma, he was the strongest person, and had great doctors. He went through chemo while going to school and everything. He's been in remission since, but it really touched me how important doctors are to everyone, not just people with terrible illnesses and cancer, so that's how I made my decision."
"And, do you have a specialty or are you a family doctor?"
The waitress arrived with our drinks, and took out order for food. I ended up choosing a steak and grilled shrimp while Edward had lobster and steak.
"I've been trained as an ER doctor, so I specialized in emergency medicine. Forks doesn't have quite the calibre of emergencies as I've seen in Seattle so it is a bit more relaxing and I do more follow-up with my patients than I would anywhere else since the hospital and the town is so small," he explained.
"Do you like Forks?" I asked, unsure whether he planned on staying here for the long-term, no point in continuing a relationship if he was going to be moving away, I couldn't deal with the heartache.
"Yes, I really do enjoy it, my family is here, and the people are all very nice, even if there is that small town mentality of everyone knowing everyone else's business. It's a great place," he responded. "Do you see yourself staying here forever, or for a long time anyways?"
"I think so. One thing that I missed while in California was that I was so far away from everything I'd known before my parents died. I moved away at first because it was so hard and the hurt was so new but now that I've healed some I like reliving the good memories of things we'd do together when I was a kid. I feel a bit like I'm honouring their memory by being here and it makes me happy. And honestly, this is a great place to raise my kids."
Our conversation became more relaxed as we got to know each other more. We chatted for almost two hours while we ate before realizing that we should head out.
Edward drove to his parents' house where we found Esme and Carlisle watching TV in the living room while the boys snoozed in their carriers.
"Thank you so much for watching them. How was your evening?" I questioned.
"They were great, they calmed right down and played together on the floor for a while, we fed them and then read them a few stories before they fell asleep," Esme smiled.
"That's so great to hear, I'm glad they didn't cause any other problems."
Carlisle jumped in with, "How was your evening, I think that's the more important question." He smirked at Edward and Esme turned to us with an excited look as well.
"It was great, we had a nice dinner and talked a lot," Edward replied.
"Well, are you going to go out again? What did you talk about? Were there sparks?" Esme bounced lightly on the balls of her feet.
"Mother, I haven't even taken her home yet, we are not talking about this," Edward muttered, seemingly embarrassed. I giggled quietly at Esme's excitement and Edward's corresponding embarrassment. My parents used to be super awkward around my friends none the less anyone that I went on a date with.
"Fine, you spoilsport. Just know that I'm happy to babysit anytime," Esme smiled. She walked around the room to check that everything I had brought for the boys was packed into their bag.
Edward helped me load the boys into the stroller that I had left with Esme in case she wanted to take them outside at all. He said he would come back and pick up his car after walking us home.
He helped me bring the boys inside and stood back as I set them each in their cribs.
A few moments later we were standing in the hallway at the front door.
"Thank you for coming out with me, I really enjoyed myself and hope you did too," Edward said.
"I did. It was great to get to know you more. I haven't been on a date in a long time," I replied.
"That being said, I was wondering if you wanted to get to know each other more… I can tell you that I am definitely attracted to you, and I want to spend more time with you, see where this takes us."
"Umm… I will say that I am starting to have feelings for you too, and I am interested in spending more time with you," I smiled. "I'm not sure I'm ready for an actual relationship or anything that goes along with it though."
"Look, Bella, if you want to see other people, or aren't interested, you should tell me now, because for me, if I'm spending time, dating someone, they have my attention. I don't-" he struggled.
I interrupted. "No, no! That's not it, I promise. I told you I haven't been seeing anyone since before the boys were born. I agree that when I'm dating someone, it's only ok to be seeing that one person. What I was trying to say is that, I haven't felt like this in a long time, and I'm not sure I'm ready to have a boyfriend, or whatever you want to call it. I don't think I've healed completely. As much as I'm attracted to you, I'm not ready for you to kiss me either, and I don't know when I will be so, I don't think I'm being fair to you asking you to sit around and wait for me until I stop being wary of men altogether."
"Bella, let's not get into the heavy stuff yet, I know that you are still hurt from what happened to you, and I completely respect your boundaries. I just want to spend time together, get to know you, and hopefully we can progress into a relationship after that, but I'm not going to push you further than you want to go."
"Thank you Edward, that sounds like a good start. I would love to spend some more time with you," I smiled up at him.
"Ok, good. I should get going, but I'll talk to you tomorrow, ok?"
"Sounds good, I know it's not far but drive safe. Good night, Edward," I smiled as he opened the door. I watched him reach the side walk and didn't close the door until he turned back and blew me a kiss when he was half way down the street. That man, whew.
The next morning I slept in. I woke up surprised to see the clock blinking 8:04. I then remembered that Emily spent the night with Ashley at Rose and Emmett's house. The boys must have been tired, they woke up to eat after 11 but went back to sleep quickly.
I got, leisurely dressed, packed my gym bag and started the kettle before going to check on the boys as I started to hear noise coming from their room.
I opened the door, noticing that they were sitting up in their cribs looking at one another, "There's mommy's boys! How are you this morning?" I cooed as I went to pick them up. Their little hands and feet went wild and their smiles were adorable. I gave them each kisses on their cheeks before taking them downstairs. They sat in their highchairs and started to eat some mushed banana as I started making my own breakfast.
I was a bit weird not having Emily to talk to in the morning. I am certainly one of those mothers that talks to their babies all the time, but it felt kind of odd to have a full on conversation with them. To get rid of the silence I turned on the radio and started humming along.
Half an hour later we were in the car on the way to the gym.
As soon as I walked in the door Emmett saw me and said, "well, well, well, look who we have here? How was your date with my brother?" he wiggled his eyebrows at me and had this huge grin on his face.
"It was very nice, first time I haven't felt and dressed like a mom in a year and a half. How was the sleepover? Any trouble dropping Emily off at daycare?"
"Everything went well, they tried to get me to play dress up and tea party with them last night, but I managed to get away," he smirked in victory.
"Thanks for doing that. I really appreciate it," I said sincerely.
"Not a problem, we were glad to, now are you going to give me the details of my brother trying to woo you?"
"Woo? I'm not sure about that, but we went to dinner and had a great time. Your mother said just about the same thing when we went to pick up the twins."
Emmett grabbed one of the carriers and walked me to the gym daycare to drop them off.
"I'm not surprised that she did, she was really excited for you guys. Edward's never brought a girl home before so she's very interested. Wants the last of her kids married off," he joked.
I chuckled and replied, "Jasper and Alice aren't married yet, maybe she should focus on that first."
"They'll get engaged soon I think, they've been together for about two and a half years now. I'm pretty sure Alice is ready any time, she thinks she knows her destiny and believes Jasper is it for her. He let it slip a couple weeks ago while Edward, him and I were drunk that he's been looking at engagement rings," Emmett said. "Oh, maybe I shouldn't have told you that but whatever, you're his best friend so I'm sure he was going to tell you."
"Well, that sure is interesting, I'll have to speak to him about that," I had an idea blossoming in my mind on how to freak Jasper out.
"Ok, I have a meeting to get to, enjoy your workout, I'll see you later, Bella," Emmett said.
"Bye Emmett, see you later," I waved and walked towards the change room.
After locking up my stuff, putting in my headphones, and turning my music to my workout playlist, I sent a text to Jasper, What's this I hear about engagement rings?
Imagining the look of surprise on his face when he opened the text I chuckled and headed towards the treadmill.
Sorry for the long delay, thanks for sticking with me.
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