I don't own KH.
A/N: I know this chapter is RIDONKULOUSLY long but I didn't feel that there was a place where I could have cut it because A LOT happens.
Life Out of Costume
Part 6
You know how some things you should have just KNOWN were a bad idea from the get-go? Yes? Well, I think this would fall into that category, though I didn't see it. I was currently in the middle of a bar with twelve multi-colored table cloths in my arms and a pile of decorations on my back. I was supposed to make THIS place look presentable for a bridal shower? WTF? This wasn't some design show on cable, this was a friggin nightmare.
Despite what the general public may think, just because I get some jollies with another guy, that does not make me an expert on fashion or decorating. Before you go off and start thinking that I was over reacting, squealing, and running around with limp wrist movements I'll tell you this: Larxene's friend that was supposed to have this under control backed out. Yeah, she wasn't coming. She tried to sell me some lame excuse about her throwing up violently all over her apartment.
Immediately I called Demyx for help, because well, misery loves company. Unfortunately he couldn't make it to the shower for another hour, which was only a half an hour before it started. This left me with two options- would have been three, but I was NOT calling Larxene and telling her that things were fucked up- so it was either call Rikku or call Kairi and Namine. Real hard choice, huh?
Axel txt: I will love you for a bazillion and four days if you can come bail me out of a bridal shower.
Kairi txt: What? You'd better love me anyway- what do you need?
Namine txt: Do you want me to kidnap you or something? Help you fake your own death?
I briefly considered Namine's ideas, but settled on sticking it out.
Axel txt: Will you come to the bar on 3rd Street and help me set up for a bridal shower?
Kairi txt: You'd better feed me, I'll be there in 20 minutes.
Namine txt: Give me 15 minutes or so.
The time that it took the girls to make it to the shower seemed like an eternity. Meanwhile, I'd helped myself to a few beers, on Larxene's mother's tab thankyouverymuch. Guinness is GREAT for brunch. However, when they did show up, time flew and before I knew it the room had been transformed. Granted, I had next to nothing to do with it, and just did as I was told.
"I'm glad that you called us to help out", Kairi was putting the baggies of candies, that Demyx and Zexion had put together, on the tables "it's nice to see you outside of cons. You should call more often."
"He would but he's been busy with Roxas." Namine teased.
"Really?" Kairi stopped what she was doing and turned to stare at me hopefully.
"And just how would you know that, Nam? Are you spying on me?" By now I'd switched over to coffee, I planned to make it through this ordeal.
Namine smiled and continued to fold some napkins, "I haven't seen him this happy and calm in a long time. Every time Roxas calls me he's in a good mood and your name is always brought up."
What the hell was happening to me, I felt my chest constrict and I knew my face was heating up. I tried my best to hide behind my coffee mug but it was probably glaringly obvious. God damn it, a sloppy grin was making it hard to drink my coffee, even if I was just pretending to drink it in the first place.
"AWWWW!!" Kairi gushed. "You two are so hot together that it's not even funny!" It looked like she was pretty much done with what she was doing when she started laughing.
"What?" Namine asked for the both of us.
"Axel, you no doubt would look hot in a tux, but can you picture Roxas in a wedding gown?!" And she was laughing all over again.
With that mental image in my head I couldn't help but let a chuckle or two escape at poor Roxas' expense. "I don't think I could get Roxy in a dress at all, let alone a wedding gown."
"AH! So her name is Roxy!" Shit. Demyx walked over to me and patted me on the back, I'd forgotten that I'd called him for help. "Are you lovely ladies friends with the infamous Roxy?"
"Oh, why yes, we are." Kairi looked damn near evil with the maniacal grin splitting her face and her eyes shifting over to me. "I'm Kairi and this is Namine."
"Well clearly Roxy must be the ugly friend then, because I've never seen a group of three cute girls." Demyx leaned on my shoulder until I shrugged him off. "I'm Demyx- no doubt you haven't heard of me because it seems like Axel has been keeping things to himself these days."
"Shut up, Dem." I grumbled into my coffee, he wasn't going to let this go for a while.
Kairi waved me off and came up next to Demyx, while Namine stayed strangely quiet. "So you've heard about Roxy, but never any mention of us?" She indicated between herself and Namine.
"Not a word." Dem shook his head. "Then again, I haven't heard about Roxy either. He goes away and comes back with some silly love-struck look on his face. I swear, if we were in high school he'd be doodling her name and putting hearts around it all over his books or something." Demyx and Kairi both had shit eating grins on their face as they continued their conversation. "Getting information about this girl is like pulling teeth it seems." Namine coughed but said nothing.
I got up and walked away. My two worlds were too close for comfort right now. I wandered into the bar area, we'd been in the back room that was used as a dining room. There I put my head on my folded arms and hoped that the bar would just eat me alive.
Not too long later, but long enough for my initial panic attack to subside a bit, Namine stepped up to my side. "What're you doing, Axel?" She asked and took the seat next to me.
"Thinking." I replied, not bothering to take my head out of my arms.
Namine pulled a straw from the container and started to play with it in her fingers. "Demyx is your roommate and you didn't tell him about Roxas? He actually thinks that Roxas is a girl."
I sighed and picked my head up to look her in the eyes, trying to seem determined. "So?" What was the big deal? Look at Roxas, he was hiding me from his 'other' life. Ok, so that wasn't entirely true, he was only hiding the fact that we were more than friends. Wait, were we more than just friends that happened to have sex?
She sighed and twisted the straw around itself. "I don't know how you guys do it."
"Heeeeey!" Could this get worse?! I turned around to see Rikku bounding up to me. "I came early to see if you needed help with anything." In a moment she was latched onto me and smothering the side of my face with a kiss.
I pushed her off me without even the hint of care. "What the hell?"
Rikku must have noticed Namine finally, "Who are you? Are you one of Lark's friends or something?"
Before Namine could answer I stood up between the two of them, "Rikku this is Namine, she helped me set up the shower, and Namine this is Rikku-"
"-his girlfriend." Rikku added in a sharp tone.
"Don't be nasty to her." I cut in.
To make this little meet and greet even better Demyx and Kairi chose this time to walk into the bar area just as Zexion was walking through the front door. No lie, I pinched myself to make sure that this wasn't all just some bad nightmare. "OW! Damn it!"
"Lark is on her way in, is everything all set?" Zexion asked, curiously eyeing the inhabitants of the bar while making his way over to me.
"That's Rikku or Boobs." I heard Demyx whispering to Kairi behind me.
"Oh, that's the 'other woman'." Kairi whispered back and I quickly grabbed Zexion and dragged him into the other room.
"What's going on?" Zexion asked searching my face for any sort of explanation.
"Nothing, just too much estrogen." I commented. "Are you going to stick around for the shower?"
"Nah, I was just driving Lark over and picking up Dem. I'll be back later to help you guys clean up." He surveyed the room. "Nice job."
"Thanks, it was Kairi and Namine." I realized that he had no idea who I was talking about and motioned towards the bar room. "Two of the girls out front with Dem."
Alright, let's take a moment to do an assessment of my situation right now. Currently my worlds were colliding, one in the form of Kairi and Namine while other was Demyx, Zexion and Rikku- and would you look at where I was? I was cowering in the back room hoping that it would all just blow over. Not a chance in hell. I know what you're thinking, so don't even say it, 'you made your bed, Axel, now lay in it'.
Axel txt: Can I come by and pick you up later? I feel the need to schmooze Flo.
Roxas txt: Sure, txt me when you're close.
The shower ran relatively smoothly and I wasn't required to do much more. Kairi and Namine stuck around, thanks to Demyx's insistence, since they were responsible for most of it. They sat with Demyx and I'm sure got more information and embarrassing stories out of him. Larxene seemed to be enjoying herself but something also seemed a little off with her.
"Axel, you did a wonderful job with the shower." Larxene's mother gushed on me. FYI: the woman invented the term wine-o. "Larxene is so lucky to have you as a friend. You know, I always thought that you were the one that she was going to end up marrying."
"Thanks Mrs.-" Fuck, I forgot what her current last name was. "Mrs. Lark's Mom." She just smiled at me as though nothing was amiss.
"Mom, really." Larxene found her way over to us, most of the guests had already filtered out. "Axel and I married would be like incest." She smiled up at me and found her smile easily mirrored on my own face.
"Well either way, I'm hope you find a nice girl, Lark will help you to weed out the bad ones." Larxene's mother winked at me and wandered off, no doubt to find some more wine.
I looked over to see that Demyx was helping Kairi and Namine pick up the place. "Speaking of weeding out the bad ones," Larxene started, "are you seeing one of those girls that are helping Dem?"
"No, they're just friends."
"That's too bad, I kind of like them and they're cute. MUCH better than fuck me senseless Barbie over there." Larxene gestured towards Rikku who was standing around looking at the ceiling most likely waiting for me. "What ever happened to 'I met someone'?" She asked hopefully.
I felt my posture sag and a sad smile wash over my face. "Lark, I think I'm fucked."
Her eyes grew impossibly huge and I swear every tooth in her mouth became visible with the smile that was growing on her face. "Are you serious?" She poked me playfully. "You are seeing some one for something more than just sex?!"
I nodded, but I couldn't bring myself to look her in the eye. By not telling her the whole truth I felt like I was lying to her, even though I technically wasn't. "I was actually heading out to see them after the shower."
"Well GO! You've done more than enough here, Axel." She shoved me towards the door, which unfortunately also meant towards Rikku.
"Axel, are you done?" Rikku asked cheerfully before latching onto my arm.
"Yeah." I mumbled, "I've just got to say 'bye' to Dem, Kairi and Nam."
"I'll wait here. You can bring me home, right?" She asked with a wink and a suggestive smile that promised more than just a car ride. I just nodded and walked off.
The three of them seemed to be getting along great when I approached their group. "You should definitely come and check out one of our shows, I'll put you on the VIP list so you don't have to pay the cover charge. Just tell Axel when you're going to come."
"Really?!" Kairi answered, "I want to go tonight. I've got a fake ID."
"Great!" Demyx looked at me, "Though I'm not sure if Axel will be there or not."
"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked and looked between them.
Demyx just rolled his eyes and rested his elbow on Kairi's shoulder, "It's Saturday night, I bet you our dear Axely-poo-poo is running off to see the fair Roxy."
"Oh Jebus." I rolled my eyes. "Thanks for all of your help today guys. I really do owe you one."
"It was no problem." Namine smiled back at me, "Really, I had fun."
"Good, you can repay me by taking me to one of Demyx's shows- maybe Roxy can come too." Kairi directed the second part towards Demyx. I just closed my eyes in resign and heard Rikku calling me from the door.
"I'll catch up with you later Dem." I gathered up Rikku and gave Larxene one last hug goodbye before I was out the door. "How did you get to the shower if I'm driving you home?" I asked.
Rikku climbed into the passenger seat, "My friend Yuna drove me over, Paine refused." Yuna? Why did that name sound familiar to me? "What do you want to do tonight?"
"I've got plans." I stared at the road ahead.
"Axel, you NEVER spend any time with me!" She whined and crossed her arms. "I'm starting to think that you're seeing someone else."
"Rikku, I AM seeing someone else."
She went slack-jawed and turned to me, "What?" she whispered.
"What?" I asked. "It's not like you and I agreed to only see each other."
"But I- and you- and work- and- and…" She was shaking her head and looking into her lap. "Do they know about me?"
"Of course they do."
She sat there in what I could only assume was thought, but I was having my doubts that it was possible. I did feel kind of bad, though I probably shouldn't have. "If I asked you to," she spoke softly and continued to look at her hands, "would you stop seeing them?"
"No." I don't think my answer could have been more simple, hell I didn't even have to think about it. I looked back to check traffic in my rearview mirror and noticed the faint outline of Roxas' hand print.
Fuck, she was crying. "She means more to you then I do then, doesn't she?"
"Rikku, I-"
"No, don't, I don't even want to hear it." She sniffled and rolled her window down a bit. "I thought you'd been too busy with the wedding coming up to spend time with me, but now I wonder how much time you've been spending with her."
"I have been busy with the wedding-"
She continued on as though I hadn't even spoken, "And you've been acting strange, like you get frustrated with me more than you used to." Damn it, it's not like I'd been dating her for years like she was trying to make this sound like. "But you were still so happy so I just figured…" she trailed off into some silent sobs.
I pulled over so I could face her, I wasn't completely heartless and this was more of a reaction than what I'd anticipated. "It's not like I was cheating on you or anything."
"Yes you were!" She cried back.
"No, fuck!" I threaded my hands in my hair to break some of my frustration in the moment. "You never said you wanted that kind of relationship with me and I know I certainly never suggested one to you."
"But Axel, we… I don't even know what to say."
"Look, maybe we shouldn't see one another for a while." I suggested, leaning on the steering wheel and staring out the windshield.
She laughed a little to herself, "You mean we shouldn't see each other again, ever."
"Rikku, I wasn't trying to hurt you." I looked over at her, "That was never my goal. I'm sorry."
"Yeah well you did." She wiped her eyes and tried to smile. "It's ok, I was just being stupid again."
"I don't think you're stupid, Rikku." I put my hand on her shoulder but she shrugged it off. I sighed, "Come on, I'll take you home."
It started raining shortly after I got to Roxas' school and Flo seemed to be more irritable than normal. Something about the rain making her arthritis act up or other.
"You've been kind of quiet." Roxas said, studying me from across the table. "You drove all of the way out here to sit in silence with me at a diner?"
"I'm sorry, it's just been a shit day." As usual, I pulled the sugar packets out and started a project. "You seem to be the only one that will just let me be and not keep picking and picking away at me."
"I know the feeling." He smiled and looked out the window that was quickly becoming covered in droplets.
Flo refilled our coffees three more times before I even remembered to speak again. I was just enjoying sitting in an empty diner with Roxas and watching the rain. "I broke up with Rikku." He didn't say anything in response, actually, he didn't even make a motion to acknowledge that he'd heard me at all.
"You'd better put those damn packets back before you leave." Flo growled as she hobbled by. Screw her, I put them back every time, but she still warned me.
Roxas turned away from the window to smile at her, "Don't worry, I'll make sure that he does."
"Kiss ass." I muttered and flicked a packet at him.
He stuck his finger up his nose in turn, "How did the bridal shower go? Did you set the place on fire?"
I laughed, "No, actually Kairi and Nam came over to help out- even ended up staying for the whole thing."
"You must have offered them food, or Kairi at least."
"That girl works for rum and coffee cakes, it's amazing. They met my roommate, Demyx. I think him and Kairi really hit it off." Though I probably should have been happy about this, I'm sure my tone conveyed just how unhappy about it I really was. I conveniently left out that fact that Demyx (and Larxene) believed that Roxas was a girl.
Roxas looked at his watch, "I've got to head back, I have a paper that I'm supposed to be working on."
"Alright." I felt a little put off that he wanted to go, but the kid was in Med school for Christmas sake, I'm sure he was balls into work.
I paid the bill and met Roxas at the door. It was coming down in buckets now and not showing any sign of letting up. Together we raced through the rain out to my car. It was a slow drive up the hill to the campus and it passed entirely in silence until we approached his dorm. "Wait, you can't drive back in this. Go park in the parking lot, I'll wait with you until it stops." He suggested and motioned towards the lot.
I did as instructed and once I pulled the e-brake I found that Roxas had taken off his seat belt and was snuggling his face to mine. "I missed you." I spoke softly to him before taking his ear lobe in my mouth.
"I know." He grinned at me and began to kiss me as he climbed into my lap. The rain outside prevented us from seeing out of the windows, but it also prevented anyone else from looking in- not that anyone would be out in this weather anyway.
I felt the stress and tension that had coiled up in my body slowly dissipating as I ran my hands up under his shirt. Taking my time, I kissed him with slow languid movements but he seemed hell bent on getting down to business. Soon enough we found ourselves awkwardly climbing over the seats to get into the back. "Go forward," I gave him a shove, "your ass is in my face."
"You love it." He grinned back at me, to which I pulled down the back of his pants and licked his cheek in agreement.
When I finally made it into the back seat with him I covered his body with my own. Again he was quick to get things moving and had nearly taken my pants down before I stopped him. Something felt off, though I'd be assed to explain exactly what it was. "What?" Roxas asked looking at me in confusion.
The rain was hammering down on the roof of my car and I was just staring down at Roxas below me. I was here after having just ditched Rikku only hours before, why was I having a problem with this? I almost felt like I was using Roxas and that was what really felt wrong. I'd wanted to take my time to show him that it wasn't just sex between us, unlike it was with her.
I leaned down and kissed him deeply, undoing the front of his pants more in the process, but still holding his hand at bay with my free hand. When I released him from the kiss, which appeared to have slowed him down a bit, I moved down his body, letting go of his hand, and nuzzled my nose near the base of his erection. "A-Axel?" He stuttered and looked down at me.
I had no doubts as to why he was confused, it's not like I'd ever done this to him before. Roxas had never topped and I had never given him head, but he'd never complained about it. This time was different though, I don't know if it was my stubbornness or pride that prevented me from telling him that I felt there was something different, something good, between us, but either way I couldn't voice it. This was my way of trying to convey the statement without having to say it. I licked up his shaft and went for it.
I'll spare you the details, suffice to say that if I was only half as good as I thought I was, that was still better than most. Going down on a guy was easier than and actually more enjoyable than going down on a girl. I KNEW what I was doing, and what guys like, because if you hadn't already noticed I happened to be one.
"That was… Wow…" Roxas said in a bit of daze. I said nothing but kissed him with a smile. "What was that all about- I mean, not that I was complaining." I shrugged, a little disappointed that he'd asked and didn't just KNOW- GOD I was sounding like a chick. FUCK FUCK FUCK!! "It's stopped raining." He commented looking out the window.
What do you think of when you see people at weddings without dates? I usually think that they're losers who couldn't even bribe one of their friends to go with them. I was that guy- well to be fair, so was Demyx. I secretly think that Zexion wouldn't allow Demyx to show up with a girl on his arm.
Oh, and remember that girl that bent me over with the bridal shower, the one that claimed to be puking all over her entire apartment? Well, as it turns out she contracted some STD and was put on steroids to help her immune system to fight it. The steroids made her face swell up like a balloon and she looked like a bag of smashed assholes. Oh, poetic justice. I nearly pissed myself when I saw her and the looks that Larxene was giving her.
The ceremony was quick and the justice of the peace was a pretty cool older man with a whiskey nose. At the moment I was leaning back in my chair and enjoying the open bar. "Lark, sit down, let me buy you a drink." I motioned to her as she passed by.
She smiled, took a brief look around the room and took the seat beside me. "You're so generous, buying me a drink from an OPEN bar."
"I do what I can." I smiled back at her. "You look absolutely stunning, Lark." She made a face like a horse with her lip curled back and her front teeth sticking out in response. "That only adds to it."
"I'm sure." We were off to the side of the room and even though she was the bride, we weren't really the main focus of attention. Larxene's mother's new husband's son (yeah, you're impressed that I got all that, aren't you?), Wakka was dirty dancing with Larxene's grandmother. "I never really said thank you," she stared out into the crowd of guests, "you know, for taking care of me the other night."
The other night that she was referring to was her bachelorette party. I was, thankfully, relieved of my duties and merely rented her a limo. Her and her girl friends went out on the town, to a few bars, two strip clubs and the night ended with a tearful phone call from Larxene asking me to come over. The gist of the situation was that she was hammered and had been having some regrets about the whole marriage thing for a while and it all came to a head that night.
I bought some ramen, Gatorade, and saltines and headed over to her apartment. Zexion hadn't moved in yet and she was still living alone. I ended up spending the night at her apartment holding her hair back while she puked in the toilet, washing her off when she puked on herself, washing myself off when she puked on me, and just telling her that everything would work out.
"I love you Lark, you know I would do anything for you." I clinked my glass with hers before taking a sip.
"Love you too." She smiled into her glass. It was strange, but Demyx was walking around with Zexion while he met Larxene's family like he was the groom or something. I was entertained. "What's going on with you and Dem?" Larxene asked obviously watching our two friends as well. "It's almost like he's avoiding you."
I sighed and sat back, "He's pissed at me because he thinks I'm keeping things from him."
"And are you?" She already knew the answer. "Why won't you just let us meet this girl? Are you afraid we're going to jinx the whole thing or something?"
"There's a little more to it than that." I muttered and finished off my drink, thankfully I had the foresight to get two when I was in line before. "Lark," I looked at her directly, "I…", she gave me an encouraging look, "the person I've been seeing is a guy."
"What?" She looked at me like I was fucking around with her, "You're seeing a guy named Roxy?"
"No, I'm seeing a guy named Roxas, who I call Roxy to irritate him."
She stared at me for a hot second and tried to decipher whether or not I was bullshitting her. "You're for real aren't you?" I nodded. "You've got to be shitting me- you, Axel, my best friend who has had more girls than I've had meals, is batting for the other team?" I rolled my eyes at this and took a gulp of my drink. "Looks like Zexion picked the wrong roommate to fall for then, doesn't it?"
I had to laugh, "Guess so."
"So this is why you haven't told Dem? Why?" Now, I could understand her confusion, after all we were all chummy with Zexion and he was even hitting on Demyx nonstop.
"I don't know Lark, I didn't expect this thing to become what it has. I honestly didn't see it coming. It was just like all of the sudden BAM, there and in my face." My eyes sought out Demyx in the crowd again, his eyes met mine briefly before he turned away quickly. "I'm not exactly sure how comfortable I am with being the way I am right now, let alone anyone else knowing. I mean shit, look how long it took me to tell you!"
"You should tell him." She looked at me seriously, "Axel, he might help, you never know."
"I don't know Lark, but we should probably go and save your grandma from Rico Suave over there." Wakka looked to be dry humping the old woman by now and she was absolutely clueless.
It had been a few days since the wedding and Demyx and I were in an old married couple routine. Read that as an old married couple that hated each other but knew they were stuck with each other in their wrinkly skin bone sacks with cancer spots and liver disease routine. You know, the one's that coexisted with minimal civility. My grandparents on my father's side were like this.
He didn't tell me when his shows were, didn't save me extra from what he'd cooked and wouldn't even pick up my towel in the bathroom if it fell. Each day that this went on I felt more and more guilt building up inside me, which I guess was his purpose in the first place, but today was my breaking point. Demyx had left me a post-it note on the kitchen table saying that rent was due. This might seem harmless, but not if you knew Demyx. He was sitting in the other room, could have TOLD me that rent was due, but instead, scratched the note in front of me, left it on the table and walked off into his room.
"RENT'S ON THE TABLE!" I yelled at his door and stomped off towards the living room. From there I proceeded to mess up all of the mini-blinds. I pulled one side up, flipped random slats and even stuck a pot of ivy into one of them. Before you go off thinking that I'd lost my mind, let me explain. Demyx is a bit OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder). He has to have the carpets vacuumed a certain way, washes himself in the shower in a certain order, where if it gets screwed up, he has to start all over again. Another one of these triggers is the mini-blinds. Even if ONE blind is out of place he will have a fit- now imagine his reaction to seeing what I'd just done.
I walked out the front door making sure to slam it as hard as I could behind me.
"I was thinking about bringing another costume to the convention this weekend, but I wanted to ask you about it." Roxas sounded excited, but I was having a hard time caring. I was still reeling from my incident with Demyx and needed an outlet for my frustration. Unfortunately, Roxas had chosen this particular time to call me.
"Do what you've got to do." I answered rather flippantly. I was on a mission to get some greasy-ass Chinese food at the moment.
"Are you all right?" His voice was worried.
"Yeah, fine- look did you NEED something?"
There was a pause in his answer, "Did I do something?" The question was almost hesitant.
"Look, I don't have time for this right now. I'll call you later." I huffed into the phone before snapping it closed. Immediately after I pocketed my phone I heard it going off. The caller-id said Roxas and I pushed it into voicemail. I don't know why I was starting shit with Roxas, I just felt like it. I was pissed and I guess taking it out on him- I almost in a way just wanted to have it out with someone, and since Demyx wasn't speaking to me Roxas got the brunt of my anger.
I stalked up to the counter of the restaurant and may have nearly scared the shit out of the little woman behind the counter. "I help you?"
"Can I get an order of pork fried dumplings and a pint of lo-mien?" My phone was vibrating in my pocket again.
Roxas txt: Stop being a dick and answer your phone.
The woman rang me up and I moodily sat down to wait for my order.
Roxas txt: If you've got a problem with me then tell me- otherwise I'm going to assume that you're ragging it, you little bitch.
The anger melted away from me after reading that last line, but I didn't give him the satisfaction of replying.
The convention was just what I needed. I viewed them as a break from reality, but not quite a vacation. My mind began to wander and I imagined being on vacation and burying Roxas up to his neck in sand, then leaving a sandwich just out of his reach. Maybe a crab would happen by. Hahaha, he'd get crabs. "Axel!" Kairi yelled and broke my train of thought.
"What?" I asked, wondering if I'd been voicing my thoughts out loud- again.
Roxas rolled his eyes, "She's been calling your name for a while now and you've just been staring off into space."
With my daydream still on my mind, I couldn't help the chuckle that escaped my mouth when I looked at Roxas. "I'm sorry, what?"
"I was asking you if you wanted to go to the dealer's room with me while Roxas and Namine went to change. We could go get some more poooooorrrrrnnnnn!" She said porn in a sing-song voice like the word NEEDED to be more appealing, please.
"I like porn." I answered- wait a minute. "Why are you going to change with Namine?" I spun around to Roxas.
"We brought other costumes to wear and the group photo shoot for them is in an hour." Roxas explained while txting someone. "Remember I tried to talk to you about it but you were being a bitch?"
"Fuck off." I said in good humor and he smiled up at me. See, that was the thing about Roxas, he got it. Not like he was cool with things after I explained them, I mean he got it as in I didn't have to explain things.
Our little group broke off, Kairi and I headed off to the dealer's room while Roxas and Namine went off to do their stuff. "How's Demyx doing?" Kairi asked walking beside me.
"I don't know; he's not talking to me."
"I'm sorry, does it have anything to do with Nam and I?" She asked timidly. "Anything we said?"
I shook my head and smiled over at her, "Nah, it's just something that we need to work out. He's too sensitive for his own good and I guess I'm too insensitive for mine."
The dealer's room was packed and there was retarded sugar pop music playing very loudly from one of the booths. We wove our way up and down the aisles, stopping every now and again so that Kairi could look at some figurines or people would stop us and ask for a picture. Eventually we made it to the crack dealer – aka porn dealer. I swear we spent a good hour leafing through various doujinshis that they had. I found a rather disturbing one of No.8 and No.13 and couldn't resist. No.13 was in some rather sticky predicaments and I felt this would be a perfect gift for sweet little Roxy.
When I finished paying for my purchase a cold wave of fear washed over me. I'd just bought him a present. It wasn't his birthday, it wasn't any holiday and I bought him a present.
"I should let you borrow Kingdom Hearts I and II so you can finally play the game and not be some n00b walking around in a leather trench coat." Kairi commented as we walked by a used game booth.
I tried by best to look appalled, but was still irked by my earlier actions. "B-but Kairi, there IS no spoon!"
"Damn, I think these people are starting to get to you, nerd." She grabbed my arm and ushered me towards the door. "Let's head back to the lobby, everyone should be there for the gathering by now. Besides, I just spent my entire week's paycheck."
"What do you do with all that crap?" I asked, looking at the small bags she had. Seriously, if I could fit stuff that I'd bought with my entire week's pay check into those small bags I'd be pissed.
"Look at it?" She sounded unsure but then giggled afterwards. "I don't know, I just like it."
Grateful to be out of the sugar pop congested hell that we had been in inside the dealer's room, I didn't even notice Tidus walking straight towards me until he was nearly in my face. "Whoa! Tidus, 'sup man?"
"Hey! Long time no see. I wasn't sure whether you'd be coming to the con or not, I don't ever see you online." He grinned and appeared to be alone. Perhaps Reno, my number one fan, decided to leave him alone when he saw who he was going to talk to.
"We were just heading up to see ROXAS, so we've got to go. See ya!" Kairi waved right in Tidus' face and walked briskly away.
Tidus just rolled his eyes, "I have no idea why that girl hates me." We watched her weave through the crowd until she stopped and gave me a questioning look for not following her.
I put my hand on his shoulder, "Do you really care?" The question was skeptically sarcastic and he laughed a 'no'. "Come on, let's go oogle the nerds." Kairi did NOT look pleased that Tidus had joined us, but kept any comments that she had about the new addition to herself.
Off to the far side of the hotel lobby was a mass of color converged into one lump, that must have been the group photo-shoot that they were talking about. As we approached the area, I made sure not to stand too close to Tidus. I wasn't going to ignore the kid, but I didn't want to send Roxas COMPLETELY over the edge either- and if what Sora had said was true, that's exactly what would happen.
When we got close enough to see who was in the group, my eyes immediately found Roxas and Namine- holding each other. My stomach twisted in a weird way and I felt very pissy. "OMIGOSH! They're so cute together!" Kairi squealed from next to me. Namine planted a kiss on Roxas' cheek for a picture and again Kairi squealed. "I have to get a pic of this!"
I was seeing red and I didn't even know why! "Wanna go get something to eat?" Tidus asked looking just as happy as I felt.
"Yeah, I'm starved." I agreed and we headed out of the hotel.
Lunch with Tidus wasn't anything special. We found ourselves in a sub shop nearly a block away.
Roxas txt: Where are you?
"Looks like they noticed that you were gone." Tidus smirked at me and I just 'humph-ed' a grin.
Axel txt: Getting something to eat.
"What's the deal with you guys anyway? Why is there so much animosity?" I asked putting my phone back on the table.
Tidus shrugged, "I don't know what the actual problem is. Roxas and I went to high school together but we got along there. I mean for the most part, it's not like we ever hung out, I think Selphie was our only mutual friend. I kind of think it's because I hang out with Reno and dress up as the same character as Roxas."
"Really? I don't get that shit." I continued to eat my sandwich and noticed my phone vibrating. Roxas was calling, I pushed it into voicemail.
"Me neither", he managed around a bite of food. "I mean I get why Roxas doesn't like Reno, but me? Whatever."
Kairi txt: Roxas knows that you're with Tidus. He saw you 2 leave together.
Axel txt: So?
"Is that Roxas?" Tidus asked trying to look at my phone, but I snapped it shut quickly when I finished writing back to Kairi.
"No, it's Kairi."
"Oh." He said, settling back down into his seat. He'd finished his food by now. "Are Roxas and Namine together?" The way he asked was almost shy and fearful. He didn't meet my eyes and just looked at his drink.
"No, they're just friends." At least I hoped, Namine had said that she liked Tidus, didn't she?
Tidus' phone went off and he ignored it, but soon enough it was going off again. He ripped it out of his pocket, "What?!" I couldn't hear the conversation on the other line but he didn't seem happy with the person. "Fine, I'll be there in a minute." He hung up the phone and slid it back into his pocket. "Sorry."
"Looks like I'm not the only being summoned." I laughed at him.
"If you want, you know you're welcome to come to our room party tonight. Room 735." We walked out of the shop and back towards the hotel.
"I don't know if I can get away."
He nodded, "I understand. Thanks."
"For what?"
"For not being a jerk to me even though all of your friends hate me." He smiled up at me rather pathetically.
I nudged him with my elbow, "Not all of them hate you. In fact, I do believe that Namine is rather fond of you." He only smiled in response.
I didn't know what to think of Tidus. It's easy enough to play Mr. Innocent or the victim, and he obviously wanted me to believe that he WAS the victim, but I was still wary of his ulterior motives even though every thing he said made sense. We ended up exchanging numbers, I figured that if things went south back in my room then I could at least have people to hang out with tonight.
When I walked into our room, Kairi and Sora were sitting one of the beds and just staring at me. "Where's Roxas?" I asked seeing the costume that he'd been wearing hanging up in the closet.
"In the bathroom." Sora pointed. "Did you really go to eat with Tidus?"
I nodded and put my stuff down before lying on the opposite bed. Kairi was up and over on the bed next to me in a split second. "What're you doing? Are you trying to piss Roxas off?"
"Don't you think you're over reacting?" I muttered.
The bathroom door opened and Roxas came out pulling a shirt on. "So we'll see you guys later? We've got to go meet Riku." Sora said, though if I had money to bet on it, I'd say he was making up an excuse to leave. "Come on, Kairi."
"Txt me." Kairi finished as they were walking out the door, but I couldn't tell if she was talking to Roxas or myself.
Roxas took up the other bed and much the same position I was already sporting. He said nothing and just stared at the ceiling. "Where's Namine?" I asked nonchalantly.
He didn't turn his head, but continued to stare at the ceiling. "She didn't want to be here when you got back but I was supposed to tell you that she had to go meet some friends."
"Why? Is she mad at me too?" I snorted.
"No, she thinks that you're mad at her." I didn't answer him and we just sat in silence for a while. "I was going to ask you what you thought about Namine and I doing a couple cosplay when I called you that time."
"I don't care." Oh YES I did!
"Namine thinks that you're going to be mad at her and that this is all her fault." He rolled over onto his side and propped his head up on his hand to face me.
"All of what is her fault?" No, it's your fault you little shit head. I think I'll keep the sticky porn that I bought for you now, thankyouverymuch.
"You being a jealous little bitch and trying to get back at me by going to get food with Tidus." I could tell that he was smiling while saying that.
Was that it? Was I jealous? "Tidus asked me to get food with him, I was hungry, so I went. That's all there is to that story." My mind replayed Roxas smiling for the picture while Namine kissed him on the cheek. Shit, it was jealousy and now I was pouting about it like a little girl.
Roxas got up off of the bed that he was on and came over to straddle me. He pulled me up into a sitting position by my shirt and looked me in the eyes. "I don't want to fight with you. I'm sorry if I made you mad by cosplaying with someone else. I hated seeing you walk away with Tidus."
Goddamnit, he wasn't even going to let me be mad and stew in this, was he? I kissed him because I wasn't willing to tell him that I was sorry too. I really didn't want to admit to him just how much it'd bothered me to see him with someone else. Was this how Sora felt knowing that Riku was seeing someone else? Did I do this to Roxas when I was seeing Rikku?
"I still don't see what the big deal is," I feigned not caring, "but if you want to make it up to me I wouldn't mind." I waggled my eyebrows at him.
He ground himself down onto my lap suggestively, "Actually, I need to get some food, since someone ate without me."
The rest of the con went by without incident. Things were smoothed out with Namine and things with Tidus were left at nods from across the room for the rest of the weekend. It wasn't all vanilla though, oh no. I'd severely underestimated Roxas' kink factor. Late Saturday night I found myself screwing Roxas into a wall in the stairwell near our room because he demanded costume sex. Those coats get damn hot but it was definitely worth it, besides, everything just Windexes off of them!
I didn't think it would, but Aerith's diabolical plan to keep Cloud to herself seems to have worked, for the meantime anyway. Things appeared to be back to normal with her and Yuffie chit chatting away about how much of a skank they thought Tifa and her big boobs were and how she wasn't right for Cloud anyway. I wonder if Cloud really did see something in Aerith, after all, this has been going on for over three years now. What a dumbass.
"Axel, can I see you in my office, please." No, it wasn't a question, it was a statement. Xemnas waved me in from his desk and I had a hard time remembering the last time this had happened. "Close the door behind you." Fuck.
I quickly racked my brains to think of what could possibly be going on. Was I getting fired because they realized that I didn't do anything? Did someone piss in the coffee and blame it on me? Don't ever ask me why I go to Starbucks every day, don't. I calmly took a seat opposite his desk. "What's going on?"
"Do you know a Miss Rikku Al Behd?" He asked, reading the name off of a paper on the desk in front of him.
Crap. Ever since the break up Rikku had been doing nothing but giving me dirty looks, blatantly ignoring me and going out of her way to make sure I could hear her telling Aerith and Yuffie how awful of a person I was. Normally I wouldn't give two shits about what these people thought of me, but when I was sitting in the boss' office because of it, it pissed me off. "Yes, I know her. She works in our IT unit."
He pushed a paper across his desk to me. "She's bringing you up on sexual harassment charges."
"WHAT?! You've GOT to be fu-, I mean kidding me."
"It says here that you've touch her inappropriately in the work place." He read from his own copy.
Hell yeah I'd touched her inappropriately in the work place, that's because she had this funny habit of liking to have sex with me here! "Sir, I assure you-"
"Save it." He sighed, sat back and steepled his fingers before him. "Axel, look, I know you're a good kid, but to be fair, I've seen this Rikku."
I cut him off because it sounded like he was insinuating that he could see WHY I'd done it, "I swear-"
"I'm not saying that I think you did it, calm down." He waved his hand as if to blow off my outburst. "Looking at her though, you can see why people would think that you DID do it though, right?" I didn't know if he was aware that his statement could have been perceived as sexual harassment as well. "I'm not completely unaware of the things that go on outside my office." He looked down his nose at me. "I knew that you were seeing Rikku, hell I even know about Aerith's second abortion."
"I'm impressed?" I didn't know what to say but it didn't sound like I was in as much trouble as I would have been if he'd been taking this serious and by the book.
"It sounds to me like you two were seeing each other, you went and found yourself someone 'special'- congratulations on that by the way, good ones are scarce these days- and Rikku didn't take it so well. Now she's trying to get back at you."
"Yeah, that's about it." I nodded and leaned forward in my chair. "She turned into a- well for lack of better word, psycho hose beast."
"They all do." He nodded over to a picture of himself and his blue haired wife, Saïx. "Well," he slapped his hands down on his arm rests, "there's only one way to handle this."
"There is?" I asked anxiously.
"You need to go to sensitivity training." My head dropped into my hands. "At least that's where I'll tell people you are. Take the rest of the week off. This way Rikku gets to think you're being 'punished' and at the same time you get a break from her."
My head came up and I grinned across the desk at him. "Are you serious?"
"Of course!"
"Sir, no offense, but you're pretty damn cool."
"I try. Now go- don't forget to look all pissed off and irritated when you leave!"
Before I left I had to tell Xigbar what was going on. I grabbed him from the mail desk, even though it was an hour before we normally took our break, and we headed over to Starbucks.
"I still can't believe you ditched Boobs. Who DOES that?!" Xigbar had no problem wrapping his mind around the fact that my boss just gave me a week's paid vacation but he couldn't understand the loss of Rikku. "Arrrrr!!" He signaled Sora with their gay finger hook.
"You guys are early today, what's up?" Sora asked before turning to a pimple faced kid behind him. "Grande pike roast and venti chai." He turned back to us and leaned over the counter mouthing 'new kid' with a smile.
"Boobs filed sexual harassment charges against Axel here!" Xigbar laughed and slapped me on the back. "So they gave him a vacation."
"Oh my god, really?" Sora look scandalized and I merely nodded in confirmation. "Can she do that?"
"Of course she can! She's hot and therefore can get away with whatever she wants to." Xigbar grabbed his coffee and signaled to us. "Well, I'll see you in a week, buddy!" He raised his coffee in salute to me. "And I'll see you tomorrow, Sora, because some of us need to get back to work."
"Man, that is still pretty messed up." Sora muttered as he rang me out, unfortunately I hadn't noticed that Xigbar had stuck me with paying for his coffee as well.
"Tell me about it." I muttered.
"I guess it's karma or something- you know, for seeing that girl and Roxas at the same time." I just rolled my eyes at him. "I'm glad that you've finally stopped. It wasn't really fun seeing Roxas with someone else, was it?"
"Shut up, Sora."
"Whatever, he's got you wrapped right around his finger now, and I think you like it. I bet you couldn't even have sex with someone else if you tried." He was sporting a shit eating grin and leaning heavily across the counter. I just sipped on my latte and pretended to ignore him. "Seriously though," he stood up and made sure that I was listening before he continued, "you should tell him."
"Tell him what?" I said moodily, like I was only half participating in this conversation.
"Tell him that you only want to be with him and that you want him to only be with you."
I didn't like all of this scrutiny into my relationship with Roxas, "Is that what you want Riku to say to you?"
"Well, yeah, but I want him to add 'forever and ever' at the end of it too!" His face washed over with a goofy smile and I decided to take my leave.
The apartment smelt and sounded amazing when I walked through the door. I had taken the long way home because I wasn't exactly anxious to start my vacation aka sitting home for a week with my roommate who was busy ignoring my existence. After taking off my coat and throwing the rest of my shit haphazardly on the couch I ventured down the hall towards the kitchen. Demyx was dancing around with the broom pretending it was his bass and playing along with the music. I watched the scene for a moment because he looked happy and I hadn't seen him smile in a while. I'd been on the receiving end of nothing but scowls and blank faces.
He spun around and noticed me in the doorway. "JESUS CHRIST!" he yelled and grabbed his chest. "You scared the shit out of me."
"I'm sorry." I said but didn't move.
"It's ok, I just didn't hear you come in." He said and turned the volume down on the radio and went back to taking cookies off the baking sheet and putting them on a plate.
"No, Dem, I'm sorry." He turned to look at me over his shoulder. This shit had gone on long enough and I was missing my best friend. "I'm sorry for not telling you about Roxy and well everything."
That must have gotten his attention because he turned around fully to face me. "I don't understand why you were shutting me out in the first place. I thought maybe she might be ugly or something but Kairi told me that I was wrong."
I came up and took one of the cookies from the plate, and began to munch on it. The whole world could be on fire but if you put home made sweets in front of me I could care less. "Dem, I'm seeing a guy. Roxy's name is really Roxas and I think I might be falling in love with him. I didn't tell you because I don't know, I thought it would be weird or some shit."
"Wow." He said and looked down at his feet and stayed silent for a while.
"Pretty much." I agreed, and stood next to him contemplating my own feet. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you before."
"No, it's cool. I get it now." Suddenly he was animated again and eating his own cookies. "Does this mean that I'll get to finally meet him?"
I smiled over at him and knew that it was going to work out and that we'd be ok. "Definitely."
"You never, you know… about me, right?"
That statement was nearly laughable. "Oh god no. No offense or anything Dem, but you're not my type and I'm not gay. It's just this kid." The whole scene was, in my mind, anticlimactic but thankfully so.
"Can I tell Zexion?! He'll shit!"
"I think Zexion has already guessed what's going on, but knock yourself out." I continued to grab more cookies. Demyx started looking at me with a smile and a face that clearly told me that he was about to say something teasing. "What? Just say it, you know you want to."
He cracked, "I was just thinking that it's so cute that you care about this guy enough to come out to your friends."
And that was it. That was exactly what was going on. I cared about him enough that I wanted people to know that I was seeing him, that I didn't want him to be something in my life that I hid from my friends. I was not about to exchange manicures and do each other's make up with Demyx so we were going to end this little tea party now.
Demyx didn't really seem too surprised to hear about Rikku's revenge. Like the good friend that he was he offered to go with me to egg her on the street, but unfortunately I decided not to push my luck.
Axel txt: I have the week off from work what are you doing?
"Awww, are you texting him? Tell him that I said 'hi'!" Demyx lingered over my shoulder.
"Don't make me regret telling you." I look at him sternly.
"Fine, fine, whatever. You should call the girls though, the band is playing at Smitty's tonight." He threw back as he walked into the bathroom. Smitty's was one of my favorite bars. It wasn't pretentious, it catered to its regulars, and it had the best beer selection around.
Roxas txt: I'm packing to go home.
Axel txt: What? Why?
Roxas txt: It's holiday break, duh. I don't have school for a week and a half.
What the hell? Why didn't he tell me that he was free for over a week? I immediately called him, sometimes txting just didn't cut it. "Dude, let's go somewhere fun, get drunk and make general asses of ourselves!"
I heard him laugh into the phone, "I have to go home, my mother would kill me if I didn't go."
"Does that mean that I won't get to see you for a week and a half?" I asked, trying to keep the dismay from my voice.
"Bawww, do you miss me that much?" He laughed some more and I didn't dignify that with a response. "I'm only going to be at my parents' house for a week, I'm going to come back to school early. As soon as I get back I'll let you know."
"Yeah, yeah, yeah, whatever. Have fun."
"I'll call you."
"Oh, wait, before you go-"
"Yes?" Was it me or did he sound hopeful?
"Picture your mother naked for me."
"You're such an asshole." He hung up the phone and I felt somewhat satisfied that I'd made him suffer a bit.
The week was DRAGGING by and it'd only been four days. I'd sat my ass in front of the TV for three of those days playing the Kingdom Hearts games that Kairi had loaned me. They were a little too cutesy for my taste and Donald Duck pissed me off more than was probably rational. I was also a little peeved when No.8 died, I mean really, what the hell. Oh, and I had to agree with Kairi, No.8 totally had wood for No.13, no doubt. I'm sorry, but best GUY friends do not interact that way normally, Disney or not.
Ugh, Demyx was off tooling around with his band, practicing for something or other and everyone else was at work. I was going stir crazy and had to get out of my apartment. That was when I got the brilliant idea to go visit Roxas. I was a little shocked to learn that he lived a little over two hours away when Namine gave me his address, but figured that I had nothing else better to do.
The ride there was boring as sin too. I chain smoked and listened to music obscenely loud just to stay awake. And just when I was starting to think that magical road creatures were adding pieces to the stretch of road that I was driving on, making it longer, I spotted my exit. THANK FUCKING GOD!
Roxas lived in a rather posh section of clean looking town. There was no graffiti to be seen, no boarded up buildings and only well manicured lawns with white picket fences. Roxas' house itself was intimidating. It was HUGE and stark white. I pulled into the driveway and parked behind a well polished Mercedes Benz. What the fuck? I had no idea that Roxas was so well off. I guess it made sense though, his family all being doctors and whatnot. It made me wonder though, just what he thought of the rest of us.
I admired the white rose bushes that grew near the driveway on my way towards the house and almost turned around to get back in my car. Suddenly this wasn't seeming like the best idea, but I pushed on. When I reached his high lacquered front door I stood there like a retard with my finger hesitantly over the door bell. When I finally pushed it I had the urge to play ding-dong-dash.
Thankfully Roxas was the one who answered the door but seemed shocked as hell to see me. That was understandable. "Axel?!" He looked behind himself before joining me outside with the door not quite closed behind him. "What are you doing here?" Was that fear in his voice?
"I came to see you." I grinned. "Want me to kidnap you?" I asked only half serious.
The door opened behind Roxas and I saw a girl with short brown hair that curled up at the ends. "Oh, hi!" She waved cheerfully and Roxas went white. "Your mother said dinner was ready." She told him.
"Selphie, this is my friend Axel." Yeah, his friend that liked to do dirty things with him. "Axel, this is Selphie."
"Oh you must go to school with Roxas." She said, holding her hand out to me, but when I went to take it she shook her head. "No, look!" She held her hand up in front of me. "He finally asked me!" Then I noticed it, the GIANORMOUS diamond engagement ring on her finger. "We're getting married!" She squealed and latched onto Roxas' arm.
"Congratulations..." I managed to get out while staring at them together. My insides were coiling around on each other and I felt my heart POUNDING in my chest in an irregular rhythm. There was fire pulsing through my veins but I was frozen stiff.
"Will you stay for dinner?" Selphie asked politely and I just wanted to punch her in the throat.
I shook my head, "I have to get going." I didn't say anything else, I couldn't! I just turned and started walking.
"It was nice meeting you!" She called out to me as I walked away.
"Axel?!" Roxas questioned behind me. I couldn't even turn around to look at him and picked up my pace. "Axel!" That's all he could say? No, 'ha-ha, just kidding' or at least a 'let me explain'?
I felt like I'd been kicked in the gut and my blood was rushing so fast that there was a pounding in my ears blocking out any and all sound. My stomach turned again and I found myself throwing up in those beautiful white rose bushes. What the fuck was happening to me? I shut my phone off and didn't even remember the drive home.