Girl On The Move

Chapter Six

'How does it always come down to me messing something up? As usual, I over think things and end up digging a deeper hole as usual. I am going to end up just like my mother, I know it! Always running away from my problems, like I am doing now. Instead of sitting out on the fire escape, I am in my bedroom, hoping that Duncan just forgets all about me. That may just be best for everyone now.'

I closed my laptop, not even in the mood to write a new blog entry. Duncan was still playing on my mind, what had I done? I had ruined a perfectly decent chance at a relationship. I had never had a relationship before. I never stuck around too long to even get a relationship. I never thought that anyone could fall for someone in such a short amount of time, but Duncan had been different. Duncan had been special. Duncan had been the person I had been waiting to meet for as long as I could remember. I just had to go and ruin it for myself.

I couldn't wait for my mom to make her own mistakes when it came to love, at least that way we could move again. I wanted to get as far away from Manhattan as possible. Maybe go somewhere nice, like California or even Washington D.C. I didn't care, as long as we were no longer in Manhattan.

I fell backwards, lying down on my bed with a thump. Life sucked a lot. My life always seemed to suck a lot. Being the new girl was never an easy thing for anyone, but I should have been used to it by now. I wasn't.

"Yeah..." I heard my mother talking; she must have been by my bedroom door for me to have heard her. "Of course." And just to prove me right, she walked in. "I will get it all printed onto the computer when I can." Her goofy smile was wide as she held the cell phone to her ear, no doubt talking to the secretly gay secretary.

"Okay, bye." The smile never left her face as she hung up and pounced onto my bed beside me. "How you doing, Courtney?" She asked. How good it must have felt to be so high up on love. Maybe I would never know.

"Was that Matthew?" I asked in a childish way, as if I was the adult and she was the child. Sometimes that was how I felt, as if my mom was more childish than I was. I don't want to sound mean about it, but she was quite immature.

"Yes, it was, mommy." She replied, getting what I meant. Sometimes I also thought she could read my mind. "Do I need to ask your permission before seeing him again?" Her bottom lip was stuck out in a pout and she batted her eyelashes up at me.

I couldn't help but smile, I couldn't help but laugh. I picked up on of my pillows and hit her with it. She started laughing too. That was the good thing about mom, she always laughed. I loved her laugh. I never used to hear a lot of it when I was growing up, but now we have out life some-what settled, we finally had something to smile about.

"So, what's the inside scoop this week?" I asked my mother, trying to me nice and polite. We hardly ever talked about how her day was; it was always about me and Casey. That was another great thing about my mom; she was always putting me and my sister before herself. Not a lot of parents would do that, I was grateful mine did.

"Well..." She sighed. "I have to just generally report on the news of the world right now." Mom didn't seem too happy about that, her voice lowers and her face following. "They aren't sure what position I would be best at, so they're trying to get me to do a bit of everything first."

I nodded, understanding perfectly. Maybe starting a new job was like starting at a new school. You didn't know anyone; you didn't know who you should avoid and who you should suck up to. You didn't know anything.

"So, how was your day?" She asked. We had decided to keep Matthew an 'off' topic subject. Until mom found out more about him, got him to smile and ask her on a date, he was a closed off deal. We were not to speak of him, but walking purposely into my room whilst on the phone to him was perfectly fine in her books.

"Oh, you know...Just dandy." I replied, the most sarcastic smile on my face I could give.

Mom understood me, which was another good thing. She simply wrapped her arms around my body, hugging me close on the bed and simply replied, "Things get better. They always do."

Tap. Tap. Tap.

We broke apart, both turning over to my window. Duncan was stood there, to both of our shock. He was leaning against the side wall, so we could only see him from the side as he looked out, over the view from the fire escape which I had.

"Maybe things will get better now." Mom told me. "You have a visitor." Because that wasn't obvious.

She got up from the bed, leaving the room to start getting undressed most likely. She was still in her work clothes, not long having gotten in. During the first few weeks, mom always worked late, showing she was a dedicated person to the company. Of course, this was a downside for me and Casey. We would usually be home alone, her having to sit outside and wait for me as her bus came home earlier than mine too.

I always cooked dinner for us, I always made sure that Casey had a bath and was in bed by the time mom was home. She did always stay awake, though, waiting for our mother to come say her goodnights. As mom described it, as soon as Casey felt her lips press against her forehead she drifted straight off to sleep. Poor thing, she did have a hard life.

I came back from my world, thinking about how much mom worked to keep me and Casey clothed and fed, realizing Duncan was still outside. He hadn't knocked again, but I knew he was waiting for me to answer him. This wasn't going to be good. But I took in a deep breath as I heard my bedroom door click shut. The last thing I wanted was my mom anywhere near the scene that was about to unfold between me and Duncan. I slowly got up from my bed, walking over to the window. Duncan was still out there, leaning forward against the railings that stopped him from falling to his own death.

NO! YOU CAN'T SAY THAT, COURTNEY!

Each side of my confused head kept on screaming at each other and I was stuck in the middle. I had no idea what to do or what to say, but I still climbed out onto the fire escape. I was going to face this, even if I had no idea what I was going to do or what I was going to say, but I felt drawn to go out there and at least be next to Duncan. Maybe as a form of apology. Maybe as a form of friendship, which was something we were both clearly looking for. Just someone who would be there and listen when we talked.

"Hey..." I whispered, moving across the floor so I was stood beside Duncan. We both looked off in opposite directions, neither of us really wanting to face each other.

"Courtney..." Duncan sighed.

"It's okay," I told him, braving it to look at him. Duncan looked like he was in pain, which he was, but he looked like he was physical pain to me. It was as if his heart really was torn in two, not just figuratively. "You don't have to tell me anything, Duncan." To be honest, the less I knew, the better I felt about it. But, at the same time, the worse I felt about it because I was unable to comfort Duncan.

"Hunter was my best friend..." He whispered. "I-I shouldn't have acted the way I did earlier with you." He sounded very sincere, and though it wasn't an actual apology, I still accepted it. "It's just...When you mentioned it...And told me not to kill myself...It got me too worked up...It got me thinking of Hunter and how...How I had no control over trying to stop him. I was just a stupid kid."

I reached out, hesitating, my hand mid-air, before resting it on Duncan's shoulder. I was sure if he would appreciate it or push me away, but I wanted to try. I wanted Duncan to know that I was there and I was sorry.

"You know..." He sighed again, making me worry. "I started reading your blogs a few years back, when you first starting writing them." I had been thirteen; a year after Duncan had started his own. "I felt...I don't know..." I could tell he was feeling stupid and embarrassed about opening his heart up to me. Clearly this was new territory for both of us. We'd never had anyone to talk to before.

"Go on...Tell me, its okay."

"I felt as if...As if you understood me." I looked at Duncan, puzzlement plastered on my face. "I mean...I read about how you always got close to people and then...You had to leave. Just like that." Now I was starting to understand.

Duncan and I were similar in that perspective. While I got close to a lot of people and then just left, I had millions of minor pains each and every time. Duncan had grown close to Hunter over the twelve years they had been family and then he had felt one big pain. It balanced in thought, but not in reality. Neither of us liked getting close to people for fear of having to leave.

The two of us stood in silence for a while. It wasn't awkward, it was quite comfortable. But then I realized there was something else we needed to discuss and, while I didn't want it to be at that moment, we needed to talk about it.

"Duncan..." I whispered again, not sure how he was going to take this next piece of news form me.

"Mmm?" He answered, looking straight across at the view again. It was quite a beautiful view and I could see how anyone could get caught up in it.

"I'm not looking for a relationship." I regretted not holding out longer on that as soon as the words had escaped my lips, but Duncan then chuckled. Not even a laugh, a chuckle. It was almost a manly giggle, which was strange, or at least I thought it was.

"Okay, Princess."

"And I'm not looking for a one night stand either." That Duncan laughed at. He couldn't hold it back any longer, I could tell. He hit his head down onto the railings, laughing as loud as he could. I wasn't seeing what was so funny about it, but clearly he was finding something I had said laughable.

"Okay, Princess." He choked out, still laughing behind the words. It was quite irritating not knowing what he was laughing over, but I didn't want to ask. The last thing I needed was to know what he was laughing at.

"And why do you keep calling me Princess?" I asked instead, though I wasn't sure if Duncan was even going to give me a serious answer on that subject. He finally stopped laughing, turning to look at me. His eyes danced around in the dark, giving me a good look up and down. I wasn't sure what he was doing, probably still checking me out even after what we had just talked about.

"I call you Princess," Duncan started, "because I think you're a spoilt brat." I rolled my eyes. Of course he thought something as ridiculous as that. I wasn't a spoilt brat; I worked for everything I had.

Duncan's smirked dropped from his face, as if he was now thinking about something serious. "I also call you Princess because every Princess is a damsel in distress, all in need of saving. And you, Courtney, are in some desperate need of saving."

'You know what, guys? Scratch out the whole of that last part. Maybe I do mess things up sometimes, but karma balances out. Things always go back to normal afterwards, maybe not as soon as you all hope, but it does work out in the end for everyone.

Love and Peace, Girl On The Move'

A/N: Aww...

Some sort of sweet Duncney for post-V day blues...hahaha!

I did not have a date yesterday, surprise, surprise! I stayed in my room, with my cookie monster PJs and my laptop, phone and iPad. All the company you need, I'm telling you!

Thank you to;

Guest: haha, I know! But they are just super blue...Thank you :D

ThatSuperHotSexyBookWorm: This story holds a lot of precious memories for us, huh? It is our story...I'm not looking to get any of the fics I've written published, just not something for me. Plus, they're all too shit to get published. Why is it in ever review you have to feel the need to mention food? NOW I'M HUNGRY! XD Thanks :D

DxCfanlover: I'm very glad you love it (: Yeah, poor Hunter...I really hurt my characters a lot...haha, it's like the Gods knew it was gonna be sad...Thank you :D

You guys are AWESOME!

Thanks for reading, please review (:

Love, ChloeRhiannonX