AND DONE! Please excuse any grammar mistakes, I totally didn't proof read this.

Previous disclaimers apply.

Enjoy.

Chapter 6

In one fell swoop and what felt like a punch in the gut, Barry and Iris landed in Star Labs. A little disoriented, Barry forced himself to focus in on his surroundings. All of his family were here, waiting for him to come back it seems. Cisco is taking off his Vibe "goggles" which he had no doubt used to get Barry back. Jessie gave him a wave while Wally looked on in awe. Harry and Joe were silent. They were in the same lab he was in the last time he came back from the Speed Force only this time he felt the unbelievable urge to make the world's biggest U-turn and head straight back in her arms.

Caitlin.

If Barry thought he felt the pain of losing her before he was horribly mistaken. He had never felt this way before and he was ready to do anything -anything- to stop it.

Just as he was about to speed off and get her back, by any means necessary, Iris laid her hand on his shoulder in silent comfort.

And looking into her eyes, looking at the love that she has for him and feeling his love for her in flow through him, with Caitlin's pleas for him to leave her ringing in his head, Barry realized that he couldn't. He hates himself for that.

Iris engulfs him in a hug and with no regard to who is watching, Barry lets go. He is so tired of feeling this way; this torn and angry and sad and guilty.

"I had her Iris. I had her in my arms and I couldn't do anything. I just- I just left her"

"Shh shh Barry, it's gonna be okay honey. Everything's gonna be okay. Shh" As Iris consoled him, he felt the air shift around him and he knew the others left to give them privacy. Barry was thankful for that.

He doesn't know how long they stayed like that, him in her arms mourning another woman's loss. As he pulls back he knows they have to talk some things through but he doesn't even know how to begin. How do you talk to the woman you love about the other woman that you love?

"So you love her?"

"Yes." Because why would he deny it?

"And you love me?"

"You know I do." She taught him what love was.

"And she's dead."

"She's dead." It was the ugliest truth in the world.

"This sucks."

"You have no idea."

Iris took his hands and pulled him towards to door.

"Where are we going?"

"Somewhere we can go and talk about this Barry. Somewhere no one will interrupt. I know Cisco is itching to speak with you, he saw you in the Speed Force with Caitlin. He's the reason we knew you were with her. And Dad is worried sick at the moment. I'm sorry but we need to talk first and as much as I love them, I'm going to be selfish right now and keep you to myself. Only for a little a while."

As they approached their destination, he saw that Iris was leading him to the roof of the building. Relatively private unless Cisco decided to check the security feed. She pulled him along to the edge and they both sat down on the ledge.

"Tell me why you love her." She demanded while looking out over the city scape. Central City really was beautiful, especially as the sun is going down beyond the sky scrapers. Barry wonders how long he's been gone if the sun is going down. The whole day? A few days? Iris turns her head towards him again, "Please?"

Why did he love her? Where does he even start?

"I don't know how to explain it really. I didn't even know I was in love with her until a few days ago," he shakes his head and laughs humorlessly, "I didn't even realize it until I was too late.

"But that's the thing gets me. How the hell did I not know?"

"Sometimes we don't see things that are right in front of us Barry. We're looking but not seeing. I didn't realize you loved me for so long and I am supposedly you best friend!"

"Yeah but that's different."

"How is that different?"

"You wouldn't understand!"

"Then MAKE me understand!"

"Because you're not dead! Because she is! Because we got our chance, we get to be together. You even got to know what it was like with Eddie before you lost him. You know what it's like to be held by him and what it felt like to go home to him after long days at work. You lost him but at least you had him. It's the worst feeling in the world Iris, to know that this love I have will never get a chance to grow."

They were silent for a long time after that. Barry knew it was a blow to her, comparing him and Caitlin to her and Eddie. But he didn't know how else to explain it so she would understand. He would never try to say that his loss was "greater" by any means, just different and heartbreaking in a completely different way. When he looked towards Iris he saw that she was crying and Barry felt like worst person in the world for bring tears to her pretty eyes. Barry hastened to wipe them away.

"Honey I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that. Just forget it. This is my problem and yo odnt deserve this. I'll figure it out, I'll-"

"Barry! Barry hey, listen to me. I don't care about any of that. I'm not crying cause what you said hurt my feelings. I'm crying cause I don't know how to help you."

Barry let out a humorless chuckle, "No one can help me."

"Barry, this question isn't fair by any means but…do you wish it was me instead?"

Out of everything Barry had thought she would ask him that was the last thing he ever expected.

"Iris, god no! Don't ever think that. Please. I would never ever wish that or even think of it. I want Caitlin her with me, I love her so much its physically painful, but I would never in a million years want her back at the cost of you. And vice versa.

"I never thought it was possible to love two people the way I love both you and her. Its fucked up and greedy and totally unfair. But I do. I love both of you and both of you are the best part of me. Don't ever think for one second that I resent you because you aren't her. If anything you should hate me for making you think you are anything less perfect."

"I don't want to be perfect Barry. I want to be enough for you. I want to know that even through the loss of Caitlin, I am enough for you not to lose yourself."

"Iris, honey, don't you know? You are the only reason I am here right now. When I saw Caitlin again I was ready to give up everything to stay with her. She was so beautiful and warm, just like she'd always been. I could have stood there and stared at her for the rest of eternity and never get tired of memorizing every inch of her. But she reminded me that I have something here to live for. A future and woman who loves me and who I love. A woman who deserves so much more than a man who is only able to give her half his heart. If I'm ever going to be worth anything to you, I need to fix what's wrong with me. I need to find some peace."

"Barry, you waited for me for years. You let me get to a place where this- me and you- was possible. So I am telling you I am gonna do the same thing for you. Wherever you need to go, whatever you need to do, do it. And when you get back, I'll be here.

"I love you Barry."

"I love you too."

Barry and Iris slowly moved towards each other sealing their lips in a helpless kiss. What was to come, they didn't know, but they know that together their destinies were forever intertwined. But the loves they lost long the way….well that was a story for another day.

23 years later

"Nice tie" she said as she came up behind him and wrapped her arms around his waist while resting her head on his back, "What's the occasion?"

Placing his hands over hers to hold them in place he "No occasion. Just felt like wearing this one today."

"Mmmm it is the best one" she said reaching her hand up and stroking the red bow tie that laid there, "You're missing her today, aren't you?"

"I miss her every day."

Barry turns around and places a kiss on his wife's forehead. Iris West-Allen has only grown more beautiful with age. 20 years of marriage has given him so much joy and happiness; he still can't believe how lucky he is.

He sees sadness flicker through her eyes and once again he's aware of how much he doesn't deserve her. She deserved so much more than what he's given her but she continuously tells him that she doesn't care and that she understands. She's lost someone too. The difference is that Iris has been able to let him go and he has to keep himself from returning to her every time he opens his eyes in the morning. It's hard when he knows with the right amount of effort and speed (he's calculated it enough over the years to know exactly how fast he would need to go), he could be in her arms again. It is something that they have struggled with for years and it's something that will always leave a scar on their otherwise storybook romance.

"I love you, you know that?"

"I know. I love you too Barry."

With a sad shake of her head she turns to leave their room.

"Mom! Dad! DAAAAAAAAAAD! DADDY! Look what I got."

With an "oomph" and a gust of wind Barry's face was submerged in a sea of curls as his 16 year old daughter engulfed him in hug. She pulled back from him and he saw his own eyes looking back at him filled with excitement.

It never ceases to amaze Barry the immeasurable amount of love that course through him when he looks upon her face, a face that is so much like Iris. She is more than he could have ever hoped for and everything he could have ever wanted. His daughter. His Katie. Katherine Ivory Allen.

As his daughter rambled away explaining to him the new medical kit her uncle Cisco got for her as an early birthday present (no matter how many times Iris yells at him that 6 months is not an early birthday present, its spoiling her) Barry notices Iris over her shoulder. They lock eyes and smile. Everything is okay. Still, the bowtie around his neck feels tighter, always his little reminder that the wrong hands tied it.

42 years later….

Barry lies surrounded by his family (and friends who may as well be family). He's done his duty to the universe. Now it's time to return the favor. He closes his eyes and smiles. He'll be with her soon.

They do make quite the pair.

Well there you have it! The ending. I wish I could have written it differently but for this story I feel like this was the only way to end it. I feel like Caitlin's story is always destined to be tragic and the Flash writers will probably always take things from her. So I wanted to write a a "tragedy" in regards to Caitlin in a way that satisfies me. Iris West (Allen!) is such a little nugget. And no I don't think she settled for Barry in this situation. She accepts and loves him unconditionally. Unconditionally. And Barry loves her the same way. And yes they named their daughter Katie (It was Iris's idea), after Caitlin. I have more Flash fanfics (primarily about Caitlin) in my head (that aren't all tragic lol). So more to come!

I will write a Cisco and Caitlin spin-off oneshot for this story! It will take me a while as I still do not have a laptop (I'm typed this last chapter out at work over the last week, when I sooooooooooo shouldn't have been. Oh well. But stay tuned!

The words in bold are directly (paraphrased) from the show. That last WestAllen scene in season 2 made me adore them! I just want all the characters to be happy so hopefully Caitlin can find her own happy ending.

I want to thank all of you have stuck with this story. This is my first story ever and you guys gave the confidence to write and finish it. If you have any request on stories let me know and I'll try my best! Love you all!

Be sure to leave your thoughts in the form of reviews!