Tales of Liutana II
Empty Places
Kitana had finally grown old.
She had lived over twenty-five thousand years, the Earthrealm equivalent of her mid seventies. She didn't pay much attention to growing older. Sure her wrists ached from time to time, she was moving a bit slower, and her eyesight wasn't quite as sharp as it had been in the past, but she had aged much more gracefully than most. She still even practiced using her trademark weapons, the steel fans. No, Kitana did not feel elderly, or at least she hadn't until a few months ago.
It was when she awoke every morning in her large bed by herself that she began to feel very old, very tired, and so very, very lonely. Liu Kang, her beloved husband of fifteen-thousand long years, had passed away peacefully over three months ago. At times the widow's grief was the furthest thing from her mind, particularly when in the company of their three children and their seven grandchildren, but in her moments of solitude the pain was fresh and intense.
Death was something Kitana had been intimately familiar with, having been a victim of its embrace once herself, and of course spending much of her young life bringing it down upon others. Death was a part of life no human could escape: It did not discriminate between the kind, the malevolent, the wealthy or the poor. It was a fate that would eventually befall anyone that was ever born at some time or another. But when it claimed your one true love, your spouse, your lover, your partner and the father of your children, none of that mattered in the least.
When their family, their legacy that they created together, was not distracting her from the pain, the Former Queen found reminders of her husband everywhere in the palace. When she passed by their favorite sitting room, she would picture them sitting on the sofa, shoulders pressed, as they read or talked or watched the children playing. When she entered their study, now mostly used by their oldest daughter, she would recall those often long and tiresome days and nights they spent working to ensure their people prospered.
Their bedroom, of course, was laden with the most tender memories of their marriage. Sometimes Kitana would lie awake at night letting her mind be carried away by those bittersweet recollections. She would see them lying together, curled up comfortably under the sheets while they had quiet conversations, some of them humorous, others more serious. Even now that her more passionate days were far behind her, she found her breath hitching and her body growing warmer when she thought of nights they spent making love. When they were both in their prime, it seemed like they made love constantly, and yet it never grew boring or tiresome. And she thought of when she gave birth to their children: All four were born in their bed, including one they had lost.
And it was in their bed that Liu Kang passed away serenely one night, nearly fourteen weeks ago.
The tears rushed up into Kitana's worn, grief-stricken blue eyes when she recalled the points of their lives up until that fateful night. No matter how much time had gone by, every little nuance that reminded her of him reopened her wounded heart. The weary old woman was beginning to feel almost suffocated by her mourning, which had to be nearly a hundred times more painful than when she grieved for him before. She had to get away from it… just for a little while.
She needed the time and space to let her heart heal.
"Here Grandma, I hope they made it how you like it." said Lihuan as she poured a cup of lavender tea and passed it to her grandmother.
"Thank you Dear." the older woman warmly replied, accepting the cup.
Kitana and Lihuan were seated in that very special living room of the palace for a tea break, a tradition that she kept with her oldest grandchild since she was a little girl. When Lihuan had been very small, her mother Kiyonei, being Edenia's Ambassador, often had to make long political journeys and leave her child behind at the palace for days at a time. Before her younger sister, Sun, and their cousins came along, Lihuan often sought her grandparents' company. When they were not busy working, they kept the little girl in tow; and tea time in the early afternoon became a ritual, still practiced to this day.
Lihuan was nearly a grown woman now at seven-thousand years old, and quite a lovely and intelligent one at that. She was contemplating becoming a member of the Royal Assembly as an economical expert within a few more decades, and was also a capable fighter. She had Kiyonei's same long, dark brown hair falling in waves down her back and over her shoulders, as well as those same large brown eyes full of mirth and affection. Recent grief had dulled the shimmer in those eyes somewhat, but the girl's natural optimism still prevailed. Kitana was so proud of her; of all her children and grandchildren.
For a while, grandmother and granddaughter sat in comfortable silence as they drank their tea. All the while, Lihuan had noticed the somewhat brooding expression on Kitana's face.
"What is it Grandma? You look like there's something on your mind." she inquired carefully. The young woman was fully aware that Kitana was still struggling with Liu's loss more the rest of them were, and knew that was what troubled her.
The older woman was a bit apprehensive. "Well Love, I… I think that I want to leave the palace."
"What? You want to leave?" Lihuan asked. "But… why Grandma? Where would you go?"
"It's difficult for me to be here now." Kitana said truthfully. "Everywhere I look, I see your grandfather. I'm sure all of you are reminded of him too, and it comforts you. But for me it just reminds me…" the woman paused, tears spilling unhindered. "… it all just reminds me of how much I miss him. I'm tired Lihuan… I'm so tired of hurting over his loss."
Lihuan's heart broke at her grandmother's palpable frustration. She set her teacup down and went over to Kitana, wrapping her arms around the somber woman's shoulders and holding her tightly. Like Kiyonei had always been, the girl was highly sensitive to the feelings of her loved ones, and she made bringing reassurance to any of them that were hurting a top priority when needed. She continued to hold Kitana until she was finished releasing her sorrow.
"Thank you, my Dear. You are always so caring and supportive when I need it most." Kitana said gratefully, wiping the remnants of her tears. "This is all far too draining for one old woman to bear right now, and I just need to distance myself from this place until I can fully come to terms with things. You understand, don't you?"
The younger woman shrugged. "Well Grandma, I can't say I'm too happy about the idea of you leaving, but if you feel that it's what you need to do, do it." Lihuan acquiesced. "I think you should tell everyone what you plan to do tonight at dinner."
"Perhaps you're right. I just hope your mother and your aunt and uncle agree." Kitana warily said.
Every night, the entire Royal Family gathered together for dinner at eight o'clock sharp. Kitana and Lihuan were already sitting and waiting when the others filed in. Kiyonei and Makoto arrived first, followed closely by their younger daughter Sun. Mytaliah and her husband Kuroku arrived next with their two children; son Eijiro and daughter Kalia, both between Lihuan's and Sun's ages. Lastly Zian came in with his wife Chizuru, and his clan of three, much younger children followed; Shinji, Yukina and Temir. The family ate their courses, the conversation light and humorous. Only when everyone's plates were clear and they all sagged in their seats, full and content, did Kitana decide to break her news.
"Everyone, I have an announcement to make." she said, her voice still able to easily rise above her family's chatter. Once all eyes were on her, she gently began again. "I've been doing a lot of thinking since Liu passed away… and I've decided that I want to take some time away from here."
Silence greeted her, but twelve of the thirteen pairs of eyes (as Lihuan was already aware) immediately shone with surprise and worry.
"… Mom," Mytaliah began, "… are, are you sure about this? I mean, where would you go?"
"I'm not sure Sweetheart." Kitana answered with a shrug. "There are many places I would like to travel to. I thought it would give me a chance to survey our kingdom for myself for the first time in ages. It has been quite a while since I've gone outside of the province."
"But by yourself, Mom?" Kiyonei almost pleaded. "I'm not sure how I feel about that…"
"Yeah, Mom." Zian worriedly added. "Who will take care of you? Who'll protect you out there?"
Kitana smirked wryly, "Come now Dear. I know that my best days are behind me, but I'm not a frail, sweet old lady either. I still have plenty of life in me yet." she quipped. To emphasize her point, she suddenly brandished one of her fans from her sleeve and flung it effortlessly across the large dinning room. It landed dead-center in a hanging tapestry bearing the royal seal, causing all of her family's eyes, particullary those of her youngest grandchildren, to sparkle in admiration.
Mytaliah gave a low whistle. "Hard to argue with that logic."
"And besides, I have plenty of connections across Edenia. There are many places where I am welcome. And I promise that I will write every chance I get." Kitana amended.
"Oh Mom…" Kiyonei said somewhat somberly. "What in the world will we do without you here? We already don't have Baba anymore, and now… now you're leaving us too?"
Kitana's heart nearly broke at the apparent heartache on her youngest's face. "You'll all be alright Kiyonei. And I'm just leaving for a little while. I just need to get away from here for a bit. I need some time to myself to make peace with your father's death."
The three siblings looked between each other somewhat nervously, and all the grandchildren watched them intently for their decision.
"Will you let us send an attendant and one guard with you at least?" Zian asked.
Kitana nodded in approval. "Fair enough."
"Well, alright then Mom. I suppose it's alright with us." said the oldest Prince.
Kitana smiled. "I thank you for being understanding. I'll depart the day after tomorrow."
Kitana closed the small case containing her favorite makeup before setting inside of the single trunk at the center of her chamber. Satisfied everything she wanted with her was packed away, she rang for the servants to take it all to be loaded onto her small boat. She was going to depart at sunset, still quite a few hours away. From the port she was going to travel to Honmura via the Qing Long River to her first destination; Jade's home.* It had been a while since the former Queen had seen her oldest friend and her family face-to-face, and now was the perfect chance.
Setting her hands at her still-slender waist, Kitana turned about and let her careworn eyes travel over the large chamber. She felt a pang of both slight sorrow and fondness fill her. This room had been hers since Edenia's liberation millennia ago, and it would likely be quite a while before she saw it again. She gazed over every familiar corner, starting at her balcony, open and glowing with the early afternoon light of the sun. She scanned over the old ottoman and sofas sitting out upon it, which had been reupholstered time and time again over the centuries. She turned right and looked over the large blue and gold trimmed rug that occupied the empty space of the floor, her vanity to the right of it, a table and four cushioned chairs just beyond it, and the hearth on the far wall. She pivoted slightly to the right again and saw the entryway to her bathroom, covered by a sheer, white curtain. Almost behind her was her work desk, now bare of her writing kit that was packed in the trunk.
Finally she turned all the way about and spotted her bed… their bed. It was neatly made, the deep indigo comforter, embroidered gold coverlet and white and gold pillows all in proper place. Once again, Kitana's mind was overrun with images of herself with her late husband. A particular memory of the two of them not long after they were married filled her thoughts, and she slowly walked over, almost in a trance-like state, and sat at the edge of the bed as she allowed it to take her…
They had been married only three weeks, but already it felt as though they had always been together. They were lying back under the sheets; nude, sated and relaxed from recent and very passionate lovemaking. Liu kissed Kitana's forehead and let a slight laugh escape him.
"What's so funny?" Kitana asked, gazing up into his eyes. Liu shrugged.
"Nothing, I just feel so happy…" he murmured drowsily. "We've finally made it here."
"I know…" Kitana said. It was only seven months after the War, and although they both had come quite a long way since then, part of her still could not help but worry over what the future held.
"Liu…? Can you promise me something?" she murmured.
The new Prince gazed seriously down at his bride. "What is it?"
"Promise me, no matter what may happen in the future, no matter if we must fight again, or we argue, or whatever else can occur… just promise me that you will always be near me. Please."
The Princess gazed at him fixedly, but in spite of that determined gaze Liu could read the underlying insecurity and fear behind it. Smiling in that warm way that made her grow to love him so, he kissed her full on the lips; a loving, almost chaste kiss that made her heart thrum against the wall of her chest. A moment later Liu withdrew, looking intently at her.
"I promise you, Ai Ren, nothing will ever part us. No matter what other trauma and trials we face, I will always… always be at your side. And nothing will ever change that." he said with absolute surety.
Biting her lower lip, Kitana bowed her head as more tears spilled down her furrowed cheeks. Remembering that promise was especially heart-wrenching now. Liu Kang had kept his promise to her over the centuries. They endured through storm after storm, be it a personal struggle between them or some outside forces at work, they survived each and every test and grew stronger with each triumph. She revered that promise; revered it and vehemently hated it too.
'You never left my side… until now,' she thought despondently.
A thought suddenly came into her mind. Kitana rose quickly, or as quickly as she could at her age, and crossed the room to her old vanity. She opened the top right drawer, feeling about to the back of the mostly empty space until she felt her target against her fingers. With reverent slowness, she withdrew a small, velvet box and opened it. Inside was a very expensive-looking, golden hair clip, a bright turquoise, Edenian gemstone carved in the shape of a valve shell in its center.
It was a precious gift that Liu had given to her, a spur of the moment purchase he made during their honeymoon. They never placed much importance on material gifts, but this was especially precious to the former queen. It reminded her of those exciting, early days of their marriage; a time they both especially cherished and reveled in, for only recently before their lives had been disastrous. Kitana traced the grooves of the gem with her fingernail, smiling at the memories the adornment brought.
Reaching up, she slipped the clip behind her head, fastening it in her deep grey locks near where they were partially tied back. She wanted to travel as discreetly as possible, and therefore decided not to bring too much jewelry or other lavish objects that would give away her status: But this precious clip was coming with her.
Suddenly there was a gentle knock at her door. "Come in."
The door creaked open, and Mytaliah stepped through, smiling at her mother.
"You have everything ready?" she asked.
"Yes Dear, I have everything I wish to take packed. The servants will arrive around six or so to pick them up." Kitana replied.
Her oldest child, and Edenia's current queen, walked slowly into the room, looking about almost wistfully. Kitana looked her over: Even now that Mytaliah was almost middle-aged and married with two children of her own, sometimes she still saw her as her little girl. Kitana remembered the trepidation she felt when she learned she was carrying her first child. She did not think herself fit to be a mother, with the long list of atrocities she had committed in the past. Then she remembered when her daughter was born, and how suddenly her presence in her life felt totally natural. Right at that moment, Kitana could not imagine her life without her child, and she felt it again with her son, and then her younger daughter.
Mytaliah smiled, noticing Kitana's staring, and the latter was momentarily amazed by how much she resembled her in her younger days. It was like looking into a mirror into the past.
"What are you thinking?" Mytaliah asked.
"About how far we've all come." Kitana said thoughtfully. She began to walk out onto the balcony, Mytaliah following her closely. "I remember how terrified I was of becoming a mother. I knew having children was something I was expected to do at some point, and after I married your father it became something I wanted. But when I learned that I was pregnant with you, I felt so afraid. I didn't think I would be a very good mother."
"And you were a terrific mother." Mytaliah said. "You're still a terrific mother. Throughout our whole lives, you and Baba were always behind us, always pushing us." The queen sighed, suddenly looking very downcast. "And now you're both leaving us behind. Gods Mom, what will we do without you?"
"Oh Sweetheart…" Kitana murmured, taking her daughter into her arms. For a while, Mytaliah became a little girl again, leaning her head onto her mother's shoulder and allowing herself to be held. She released a few sniffles, and Kitana soothingly rubbed her back. "It's just like I told you all at dinner a few days ago: You'll all be fine. You've learned everything your father and I had to teach you. You all are strong willed, intelligent people, and we couldn't be more proud of you." She pulled back, thumbing away the moisture beneath Mytaliah's eyes. "And besides Dear, I won't be gone forever. I'll return the moment I've felt that I have come to terms with things. And if anything dire comes up, Argus forbid, I will return immediately."
Mytaliah looked as though she felt more at ease. "Okay Mom. I trust everything will be alright."
Hours later, the royal family gathered at the private port to bid their beloved matriarch farewell. Zian's children, save Shinji, the oldest, clung to Kitana's sides wantonly and wept. Lovingly, she patiently rubbed their backs and crooned words of reassurance until they finally let go. The other four grandchildren, all with calmer, but still noticeable tears in their eyes, took their turns saying goodbye. Lastly, the old fan-wielder gazed at all three of her adult children. She met all three pairs of moist eyes, flashing them an encouraging smile. Kiyonei approached first, embracing her mother's slim form.
"I'll miss you Mom." she murmured. "Be careful, and I pray you'll find whatever it is you need out there."
"Thank you Love. I'll be just fine, I promise." Kitana comforted.
Reluctantly, Kiyonei let go, and her elder brother stepped forward next.
"Bye Mom." he said quietly. "Take care of yourself out there. Don't forget about your promise to write."
"I won't son." Kitana replied.
Mytaliah came in for her embrace next.
"I'm going to write you a lot. I'm still going to need your insight." she said.
"You write to me about anything Darling, and how ever many times you wish." Kitana warmly affirmed.
The former queen gazed at her family one last time, before willing herself onto the gangplank. She stepped aboard the stern of the boat, standing out near the railing as she began to depart. Kitana waved goodbye, as did her family, until their forms were distant and undistinguishable in each other's vision.
Darkness soon descended, and Kitana was still above deck. Her attendant, a kind young woman named Rubette, emerged somewhat worriedly from her cabin below to check in, the second time she'd done so since the boat left the pier hours ago. Her charge still stood leaning against the railing, her weary, careworn face gazing out blankly. Carefully she approached.
"Are you well Madam? Is there anything you need?" the young woman asked.
"No thank you." Kitana answered blankly, eyes still fixed out beyond.
"Well, if you need anything don't hesitate to call." the servant said.
Kitana finally turned to look at her, an appreciative smile on her face. "Thank you, I definitely will."
Happy she'd finally gotten a response, Rubette returned the smile with a bow, before turning and descending down below again. Kitana turned back out to gaze over the endless expanse of gently rolling, black water. The full moon shone brightly in the star-filled sky, reflecting in glittering flecks of silver light on the ocean. The wind blew gently, flapping the hem of her cloak and the wisps of hair framing her face. It was tranquil and quiet.
Too quiet…
The silence allowed Kitana's mind to wander, and of course they wandered to her beloved. Heaving a sigh, her weary eyes gazed around her. The deck was almost completely empty, save the odd crew member going about their business. Once again, that sense of loneliness and sudden feeling of being very elderly and very tired gripped her. She reached back and brushed her fingers over the special hair clip, the nostalgic memories once again bringing tears to her eyes.
"Gods Liu, I am happy that you are resting peacefully… but I feel like so much of me has gone with you." Kitana murmured, hoping her beloved was somewhere listening. "I miss you so terribly, my love."
The elderly woman remained on deck for a few more moments, then slowly slunk down to her cabin to retire for the night.
*Peace Millennium foreshadowing perhaps...?
I guess this is sort of a spiritual sequel of 'Settled' from the first Tales of Liutana, even though I didn't originally conceive it that way.
Huge apologies from my lack of overall activity folks, but school has been breaking me. I'm considering taking off this summer. It'll put graduation back yet ANOTHER quarter, but whatever, I'm about to collapse… anyway, I actually wrote this AGES ago and didn't know what to do with it, and realized I could post it here. Hope you like!
My next update will probably be up in the next few days, so don't go too far. Beware… sexiness is on the horizon, and it's probably the most erotic thing I've written yet… but don't expect anything "50 Shades" kinky. Just sayin'
Okay, ramble finished. Please review and enjoy! And I'll read again Ragnarok... as soon as I figure out where the hell I left off XP