A/n: I'm so glad you guys liked the last chapter! Thank you!
tennyo13 – Thanks for the review!
CrAzY-Fan-Fic-Addict – I'm happy you liked the story. Thank you!
jisAtsU siLENcE – Thank you for reading and reviewing my fic!
Tifa246 – Thanks for the review!
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters mentioned in this fic.
Chapter 5: Confessions
Someone has changed me
Something saved me
And this is who I am
Kalm
"Cloud left on that journey for you." Tifa was still reeling from the effect of those words.
She looked at Vincent who was walking ahead of her back to the house. He was really a very mysterious man, and she still couldn't understand why he had decided to help, but she was grateful he had.
"Vincent?"
He turned to face her when he heard his name called. "Yes?"
"Thank you." she said simply.
"You're welcome." he answered, turning around and continuing down the path to Barret's house.
Tifa's thoughts turned elsewhere then. "I won't run this time." she vowed as she followed Vincent into the house. "I'll wait for you, Cloud."
Aboard the airship
"Please wait for me, Tifa." he asked her silently. "This time I won't let you down…I'm not running away anymore. I will show you how I feel this time; I'll make sure you know how much I love you…"
Cid looked over at Cloud, wondering what he was thinking. He had a distant look in his eyes, as if his thoughts had gone far, far away. "Yo, Cloud."
Cloud pulled himself from his thoughts and looked at Cid. "Yeah?"
"Why DID you go on that #$& trip anyway?"
Cloud was a bit surprised when he heard this, and he thought about the wisdom of telling Cid why, then he decided to just tell him the main reason. "I wanted to be forgiven."
"Forgiven for what?"
"For not being able to stop Sephiroth from killing Aeris."
"Guilt trip, huh?"
"…Yeah. You could say that."
"And did you get what you wanted?"
"…Yes."
Cid was quiet for a moment, thinking. Then he said: "Y'know, that wasn't your fault."
"I know, but she was my friend; and I promised I'd protect her."
"You were all screwed up yourself back then; there was nothing you could do, really." Cid said bluntly.
"…I know. But I wanted to keep my promise." Cloud answered, not minding Cid's tone.
"So what's the deal with you and Tifa anyway? Cid asked, changing the subject.
"…Tifa and I have known each other since we were kids, Cid. It's a long story."
"Well, we've got a #$& long trip ahead, don't we?
"…It might be better to wait until after I see her."
"Fine. Just tell me one thing."
"What?" Cloud asked, already tired from the inquisition.
"Do you love her?"
"You're joking, right? You can't be asking me this!" Cloud said, yelling now.
"No, I'm not joking! And I am asking you, so just gimme an answer and I'll stop bugging you! Cid yelled back.
"I can't tell you, Cid. It's a very private thing that only I know for sure – I don't want to say anything before I see her." Cloud said, reining in his raging temper.
"Fine." Cid answered.
The two men were quiet for a few minutes, lost in their own thoughts.
Then Cloud remembered something. "Cid?"
"What?"
"Back in Rocket Town, when I first arrived at your house…you started to tell me something about Tifa before Shera stopped you. What was it?"
"…I told Shera I wouldn't say anything, but I guess you have a right to know, so…"
"So?" Cloud asked impatiently, wondering why Cid was hesitating so much.
Cid drew a breath then continued, saying: "Tifa's been worried about you. We were afraid she'd worry herself to death wondering if you were okay! Man, you really shouldn't have let that happen!"
Cloud lowered his eyes as pain lanced through him. Cid's words had just confirmed the one thing he had dreaded the most. He had hurt the one person he wanted most to protect – the one he least wanted to hurt. "Tifa, I am so sorry…"
Cid looked at the younger man, immediately regretting his words. He'd seen the look of pain in his eyes seconds before he averted them. "Listen, man, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that – but it was the truth…"
"It's okay, Cid." Cloud said, smiling.
Cid wasn't expecting that kind of reaction. "What're you smiling for now?"
"No reason. I'm just glad you're my friend."
Cid's jaw dropped. It was very unlike Cloud to be so calm. He switched over to auto-pilot and quickly touched Cloud's forehead. His temperature was perfectly normal. "Man, what's gotten into you?"
Cloud shrugged then stood up and stretched. "I'm gonna go up on deck for awhile. Call me before we land, ok?" he said, walking away.
"Sure." Cid answered. He wasn't certain, but it looked like he'd found a weak spot in the brave Cloud Strife's impenetrable armor…and that weak spot was a girl named Tifa.
On deck
All the rioting feelings he had desperately wanted to keep at bay were haunting him, consuming every other thought until he could think of nothing else. And Cid's earlier remark made his heart ache…it was all he could do at the time not to break down in front of the older man.
"Tifa…" He could hardly wait to see her – to tell her what was in his heart, to tell her everything she wanted to know. He would never keep anything from her again – he would never hurt her again.
He looked up at the stars that glittered in the dark night sky, wondering what she would say when she saw him. Would she be happy? Or would she run away again? He didn't know; but he knew one thing for sure…he would follow her to the ends of the planet if he had to, just to see her smile again, just to hold her in his arms again…
These thoughts were interrupted by the booming sound of Cid's voice, yelling at him to get back to the bridge because they were going to land soon. Cloud had no choice but to comply.
Back on the bridge
"Hey kid, you nervous?" Cid asked.
Cloud didn't answer. He heard Cid grumble about something under his breath, but he wasn't interested in that at the moment. His attention was focused on something else in the distance; the town of Kalm. It wouldn't be too long now…
Kalm
The shy light of dawn was just beginning to illuminate the town when Cloud and Cid arrived. They were greeted by a very somber-looking Vincent who led them to Barret's house.
As soon as they arrived, Cloud looked around for Tifa, and when he didn't immediately see her, he asked Barret where she was.
"Tifa's in the garden with Marlene." Barret answered.
Cloud immediately turned in the direction of the small garden Aeris' mother had helped Marlene plant before she passed away.
In the garden
As soon as Cloud got to the garden he spotted Tifa who was kneeling on the ground with Marlene, busily planting new seeds in the flourishing flower bed. "Tifa?" he called.
She turned around but stayed where she was, and then she simply looked at him without saying a word.
He hesitated, not sure what to do.
Tifa whispered something to Marlene, and the little girl got up and started walking over to him.
Cloud was so caught up in his thoughts that he didn't notice that Marlene was standing in front of him until she tugged on his arm and gave him a welcome hug before she went on her way.
They were alone at last.
He started to walk toward her, but her words stopped him.
"Cloud, Vincent told me you left on that journey for me…" Tifa said, hesitating.
"…It's true. I did go on that journey for you." he replied softly.
"Why? Why did you go on that journey?"
"Because I wanted to be forgiven…"
"Forgiven for what, Cloud? For Aeris' death?" Tifa asked, her eyes brimming with tears.
"…Yes." he replied, his heart breaking at the sight of her tears.
"Why would you want to be forgiven, Cloud? You know it wasn't your fault."
"I know."
"Then why did you go? Why couldn't you stay?!"
"Because I had to go on that journey, Tifa. I couldn't move on with my life until I knew I was over not being able to help her…I had to…be free of that guilt…so I could be worthy…of you." he said, his voice shaking.
She looked at him, at the man she loved, and she finally saw. She saw just how much he cared, and how hard he had journeyed…for her. And suddenly she couldn't hold back the tears of joy and relief any longer. She let them fall like a river down her cheeks, and she ran to him and into his waiting arms. "You were never unworthy." she whispered.
He held her closer to his rapidly beating heart, not saying anything, overjoyed at being so close to her, at the feeling of finally holding her in his arms like this. He pulled away slightly, and, looking deeply into her eyes, told her what was in his heart. "I love you, Tifa."
She looked up at him and, smiling, said the words he so longed to hear. "I love you, too."
They held each other close for a long time, and they could've stayed like that forever…but the world around them intruded.
"Yo Cloud, Tifa! It's time to eat!!" Barret yelled.
Cloud and Tifa sighed in unison, reluctantly pulling away from each other and starting towards the door.
Tifa walked ahead of him, and, as if it was the most natural thing in the world for him to do, he caught up to her and took her hand, lacing his fingers with hers.
She looked up at him and smiled. He smiled back and, caught up in the moment, leaned forward and kissed her. It was the most amazing feeling; and he couldn't seem to make himself stop long enough to think. She was the same way, so they stayed like that for awhile, oblivious to the fact that they had reached the house and that they had an audience.
Cid's shrill whistle woke them up however, and they both blushed profusely when they saw that everyone was watching them, save for Marlene whose eyes were covered by her father's large hand.
"Uh…h-hey guys…" Cloud said, his face still beet red.
Everyone laughed. Their faces reddened some more.
Barret finally took his hand from over Marlene's eyes, and, as soon as he did, she looked at her Aunt Tifa and Uncle Cloud whose faces were still red as fire. "Papa, why are Aunt Tifa and Uncle Cloud's faces so red?" she asked.
"Well, uh, you see, they, um, stayed out in the garden too long, and it was so hot out that their faces got red like that." Barret answered, barely able to keep from laughing.
"But it's still really early, Papa. The sun's not really up yet, see?" she said, pointing to the window where they could see that the sun was still just starting its ascent in the sky.
Cid started to laugh, then Cloud and Tifa, relieved at having the spotlight taken off them, joined in, much to Barret's chagrin. "H-hey! A little help here?" he said helplessly.
The room was once again filled with the sound of laughter; but this time, even Vincent joined in.
"Papa, why are they laughing?" Marlene asked, confused.
"I-it's nothing, honey." her father replied, glaring at the others over the child's head to get them to stop laughing.
They stopped, but then Marlene spoke again. "Why are you glaring at your friends, Papa?"
Barret immediately smoothed his face into what he hoped was a serene expression; but it looked so out of place on him that it got everyone laughing again.
As soon as the laughter stopped again, Tifa suggested they have breakfast, earning her a look of gratitude from Barret.
Tifa was just starting to walk to the breakfast table when Cloud reached out and stopped her. She turned to him, waiting for him to say something.
"Are you hungry?" he asked.
"No, not really…why?"
"Let's get out of here."
"Where are we going?" she asked, curious.
"To the beach." he replied cryptically.
He led her away from the dining room and out the front door, quietly closing it behind them.
At the beach
Cloud let go of Tifa's hand and walked to the shore, staring at the distant horizon, as if he were thinking of something that was far, far away…but he wasn't. He was thinking of the woman who was standing not far from where he stood, thinking of the reason why… "Why did you run, Tifa?" he asked abruptly. "Why did you run from me?"
She wasn't surprised to hear that question. She had expected him to ask it, but she still didn't know how to respond, and it was a long time before she spoke. But when she did, her voice was calm. "I know that what I'm going to say will sound crazy to you, and I know I hurt you because of what I did…I'm sorry…and I-"
She hesitated.
He turned away from the sea, walked back to her side and simply waited for her to go on, his heart racing.
She took a deep breath, and then continued, saying: "…I ran…because I was scared, Cloud. I was afraid you would bring her back…bring Aeris…back…"
He took a step toward her, but he kept his arms at his sides. "Aeris was a good person, Tifa, and it's true that I cared for her…"
Tifa took a step backward, almost like she was shielding herself from his words, and she tried to hold back the tears, but it was no use. The tears fell, and she tried to run away, but he stopped her by grabbing her arm.
"Just listen for a second, okay?"
"Let go of me!" she told him, the tears flowing in a seemingly endless flow now.
"Please, Tifa, let me finish!" he said, taking her into his arms and holding her tight.
Realizing then that he wasn't going to let her go until he'd said what he had to say, she stopped struggling and lowered her arms, her eyes downcast.
"…I cared for her in the same way I care for everyone else. She was as much my friend as she was yours, Tifa."
She was surprised Cloud was telling her all this. He had never talked about his feelings so openly before, and she knew that what he was telling her was the truth, but she couldn't seem to find her voice, so she just stood there and listened to him.
"…I cared for her, but I didn't love her. To tell you the truth, I couldn't love her."
She finally found her voice, and it was filled with love and renewed hope. "Why?"
He took her chin in his hand and whispered, "Because I was in love with someone else."
"Who?" she asked innocently.
"You." he said, sealing his words with a warm, passionate kiss.
Meanwhile, in another part of town…
Back inside the house, the others had just noticed their absence.
"Yo, where're Cloud and Tifa?" Cid asked.
"I dunno." Barret said.
Having nothing else to go on, they turned to Vincent who just shrugged.
"Where could those two have gone?" Barret wondered aloud.
"Hell if I know." Cid said.
"Ah they're probably out somewhere. Let's just leave 'em be." Barret said awhile later.
"Yeah." Cid answered. Then he noticed something else.
"Hey, where's Vincent?"
"Dunno. He's probably gone out, too."
"So it's just the two of us in here."
"Yeah…hey, listen, I'm gonna go up and get some sleep. You mind?" Cid asked.
"No, that's ok. But you're sleeping down here." Barret answered.
"What?! Why?"
"Because there's no room left up there."
"Fine." Cid said, making himself at home on the living room couch.
Somewhere else…
Vincent watched the couple from his spot high above the beach. He could see from the way they held each other that everything was settled between them, and he was glad for it. No one deserved to be happy as much as they did…
He thought again of his own love, of the woman who was Sephiroth's mother, and looked down at his hands. "I have committed another sin against you, Lucrecia. But I do not regret destroying him, for if I hadn't, he would have destroyed the world…" he whispered to the wind, hoping that by some miracle she could hear his words and forgive him…wherever she was.
He looked down the beach at Cloud and Tifa and smiled softly. "Take care of each other." he whispered, turning and walking away.
Back at the house
Just as Barret was starting up the stairs to check on Marlene, his PHS rang.
He walked over to the desk and picked it up. "Hello?"
It was Red XIII. "Barret, we have a problem."
"What is it?"
"Sephiroth's back, and it seems he has Lucrecia…"
"What?!!"
"It's true; and it gets worse."
"How much worse?!"
"Much worse. Barret, it looks like she's helping him…"
"But why would she do that?"
"He is still her son."
"You're right, but…"
"Anyway, can you come to Cosmo Canyon?"
"Yeah. Everyone's here except for Yuffie. We can pick her up at Wutai before we go there."
"That would be best; we need all the help we can get. Please hurry, Barret. Sephiroth grows stronger with each moment."
"I know. We'll be there as soon as we can."
"Okay then." Red XIII said, then he hung up.
Just then Cid, who couldn't sleep on the lumpy couch walked in and when he saw Barret's pale face, asked him what happened. "We're in deep #$&, Cid."
"Why?"
"Sephiroth's back, and this time, Lucrecia is helping him."
Cid's jaw dropped. "No…way…"
They heard the door slam shut, and they turned to see Vincent standing there.
"Did I hear you right? Sephiroth…is back?" Vincent inquired of Barret, his voice calm as usual.
"…Yeah." Barret replied.
"Then I will help you."
"Are you sure? We may have to fight Lucrecia too, you know."
"…Yes, I know. But perhaps this is the only way I can truly atone for my sins."
"By fighting her?!" Cid exclaimed.
"Yes, if that is what it takes. It is time to end this madness."
"Alright then, if you're sure…" Barret said.
"I am."
At the beach (AGAIN)
She was lying on the soft sand with her head on his chest; and he had his arms around her as they watched the sun rise slowly up the horizon, each of them thinking their own thoughts, the only sound coming from the waves as they came and went.
Then, a few minutes later, Tifa's stomach growled. In the silence, it was very audible. Cloud looked at her and laughed.
She blushed. "I guess I was hungry after all…"
He grinned. "Well, we'll just have to get you something to eat, won't we?"
She nodded, a slight blush still visible on her cheeks as she sat up beside him.
He thought she had never looked more beautiful. "Let's go." he said, standing.
He helped her up. She thought it was unnecessary, but it was a sweet gesture, so she smiled and thanked him.
As they walked back to town, they were met by Cid, Barret and Vincent who all looked like they had just lost their best friends.
"Hey, guys." Tifa said.
"Uh…guys? Is there something wrong?" Cloud asked when none of them responded.
Tifa waved her hand in front of Barret's face. "Barret? Are you okay?"
She looked at Cloud.
He shrugged.
Barret finally found his voice and spoke. "I'm sorry. I know you guys are enjoying yourselves, but, uh, we have something important to tell you."
"What is it?" Cloud asked.
Before Barret could answer, Vincent spoke up. "Sephiroth has returned."
Tifa gasped.
Cloud's expression turned stormy. "And? There's more, isn't there?"
"Yes." Vincent answered in a controlled voice.
"What is it?" Tifa asked, suddenly afraid.
"Lucrecia is with him…and she's helping him."
a/n: chapter 5's done! Yay! I hope you guys like it. Tell me what you think, okay? Thanks.