-1Author's Note: I am a fairly flexible person when it comes to reviews. Especially if they have something to offer in the way of growth. I understand that not everyone ships the same pairings that I do. However, which pairs I write is my choice. Please respect that. If I get anymore anonymous reviews saying people hate the pairs I write I am going to turn the anonymous reviews off, which would make me sad to do...

Chapter Five

The Plot Thickens...

It would be so easy. Just reach across the bed. Trail her fingers along his chest. Press her lips against his throat. Let a little moan out in his ear. It would be so easy to do.

Addison sighs. It would be easy. It was tempting. Mark was right there. Lounged out next to her on the bed. They had forgone attending the opera; opting instead to watch old Aubrey Hepburn movies. She hadn't really wanted to go in the first place. At least not to Madame Butterfly. It had mainly been another way to drive Alex further away. Which it had done. How far was yet to be determined. "So," she starts, then trails off. She wasn't sure what to say.

"I miss you, Addie, a lot more than I thought possible," Mark admitted quietly. A quick glance at his face showed how sincere he was. There was a bit of pleading in his bright blue eyes. The sort she had never seen before. At least not from him.

She chews her lip before replying. "I've missed you, too, Mark." Admitting that was like putting a gun to her head and playing Russian Roulette. One never knew when they pulled that trigger if the chamber held a bullet or not. They closed their eyes, said a little prayer, and squeezed.

"Have you? Missed me?" It was him that reached across the bed. That trailed his fingers along her jaw line. It was all she could do not to shudder. A slight nod was all she could manage in answer to his question. "Do you think you could ever give me another chance?"

oOo

Slamming her bedroom door with enough force that the mirror over her dresser rattled, Izzie's mouth met Alex's. Unlike the kiss at the ballpark, this wasn't sweet. No. This one was hungry, desperate even. Needy hands tore at stubborn clothing. She didn't notice, nor would she care, that one of the buttons on her jersey popped off as Alex pushed it off her shoulder's. His mouth was hot and wet on her neck. She whimpers a bit when nips the soft skin over her pulse.

"Bed," she gasps. Placing her palms against his chest, she pushes. He falls back on the bed, grinning up at her. She smiles back, her hair in her face. Straddling his lap, she press her mouth along his jaw. Reaching down, she tugs his shirt up. He raises up a bit as she pulls it over his head. Tossing it onto the floor, she bends to press her mouth against his again.

oOo

Meredith chewed her lower lip. This was getting more complicated by the minute. Who knew getting pregnant was so hard? She was tempted to go beg Addison for fertility drugs. Something. Anything. Crouching down in front of the store display, she scans the section. The yeast infection creams. Condoms. Pregnancy tests. That was funny. Condoms and pregnancy tests right beside each other. She wondered if they were making a statement. Forget this, you will need this, kind of thing.

"Where are they?" Glancing up at Cristina, she lets out a frustrated sigh.

Cristina crouches next to her. "Hell if I know. It's not like I've ever done this sort of thing before." She quickly looks over the various products the store had to offer. Then she found it. The ovulation kit. She grabs it off the shelf, then tosses it to Meredith. "Here. The final step in your evil baby making scheme."

"It's not evil. And...it's not a scheme," Meredith mutters. There was some truth to Cristina's words though. Not that she would admit it.

Cristina shrugs. "Whatever." Sighing, she stuffs her hands in her pockets. "Listen, Mere, I'm all for you being a parent...I am...it's just...do think this is fair? Not just to Derek...but to the baby as well? What if Addison's right, and he isn't a kid person? What then?"

" I don't know. I haven't really thought that far ahead," Meredith answers uneasily.

"Maybe you should. Trust me, there's nothing worse than knowing one of your parents resents your presence." Cristina looks away for a moment. Lost in memories.

"Derek isn't like that," Meredith defended. "He wouldn't turn his back on his child."

"I never said he would. Just that he might resent this child." Cristina tucks a lock of hair behind her ear. There was no way for her to make Meredith understand. To do so would open old wounds she finally closed.

oOo

Could she? Could she give him another chance? Addison wasn't sure. At this point in her life, she had to sure. She wasn't old. Forty wasn't old. She wasn't getting any younger though. There was no room in her life to make mistakes. Mark would be a mistake. Wouldn't he?

"What is this? Why? Why are you...why now?" She chokes on the words. She didn't need, nor did she want, something like this thrown at her. Not when she was weak. Right now, she was weak. Very weak. While she was ready for the relationship with Alex to end, it wasn't easy. It was never easy when emotions were involved. She had never said she loved him, and he had never said it in return, but that didn't mean it wasn't there. At least on her part, it was there. She was certain it was there on his part as well. They just weren't meant to be. They never should have been. She realized that now.

"Because, Addie, right now...I feel like I can say what it is I need to say...and you'll listen," Mark said. He shifts around on the bed, until he is facing her. "Just this once...I need you to listen."

He wanted her to listen. Addison frowns a bit. Could she? Could she listen to him, without letting it affect her? She wasn't sure. She needed to know, though. So there would never be any doubt. She needed to know what Mark was thinking. What he was feeling. "Okay. I'll listen."

"I love you, Addison. I always have. I always will," he says softly.

oOo

It wasn't right. Alex knew that. He would hate himself in the morning. Hell, Addison and Izzie would hate him in the morning. None of that mattered right now. All that mattered was the feel of Izzie's body beneath his. The sound of her moans in his ear. Hearing his name on her lips. The feel of release. None of it was right. He knew that. The only problem was, if it wasn't right, then why didn't it feel wrong?

"I love you," Izzie whimpered.

Burying his face in her neck, he groans. Not now. Why did she have to say something like that now? Nothing about this was right. Having her say she loved him confused the situation so much more. "Iz," he started to tell her she didn't mean it. Then he looked in her eyes. He saw. He saw the love reflected there. It should have scared him. Made him feel worse. Instead, he kisses her, starting the whole art of making love over again. She says it again, almost moaning the words. Cupping her cheek in one hand, he stares into her eyes. "I love you, too, Iz."

oOo

Mark loved her. A part of her had always wondered about that. It seemed as though no matter what, he kept coming back. He was always there. Waiting. Ready. Addison wasn't sure how to respond. If she was suppose to respond. Not that it mattered. He continued on before she could even open her mouth.

"I know that I don't show it. Hell, I'm not even sure I know how. All I know is what I feel. I love you, Addison," Mark rakes a hand through his hair. Several strands stand on end, giving him a boyish look. "I don't know how to prove that to you. I'm going to try, though. If you give me the chance, I will never stop trying to show you."

That was her undoing. Addison could feel what little resolve she had unraveling. She gives into the urge to touch him. She traces the contours of his face with the tip of her index finger, memorizing every curve, every angle. It would be so easy to take his words to heart. To allow herself to give into the similar feelings she had buried in the furthest recess of her heart. It wouldn't work, though. It never did. Not between them. There would always be someone else. Some he found himself attracted to, that he wanted to sleep with, that he would sleep with. She couldn't go through that again. There was too much hurt. She had fallen for his I Love You's before. It had cost her her marriage to Derek, her self-respect, and a child. It was the child that was hardest to forget. She had made the decision. One she had to live with every day. It never went away. Dropping her hand, she sighs. "I don't know if I can, Mark."

"Is this about Karev? Addie, you and I both know that it's over. Whether either one of you want to admit, it's over. " He sighs, shaking his head. "I've hurt you. I know that...but...you and Karev...you're making a mistake if you stay in that relationship. If you really want to be honest, you made a mistake even starting it. He's an intern Addie. You're a surgeon. You are worlds apart. Not just with the work thing...everything. The kid has no sophistication. No grasp of culture. You...you're sophistication redefined. You're not being fair to yourself...or him, for that matter...by holding on."

He was right. She knew that. It was hard to hear someone else say it. To be so blunt about it. "You think I don't know that? That I'm not aware of every single difference between Alex and myself? I'm aware, Mark. I don't need you to point out my mistakes."

"I'm not judging you. I have no room. I just don't want to see you get hurt," he tucks a lock of her hair behind her ear.

"What makes you think I'm going to end up hurt?"

He stares at her for a moment before answering her. " I know you. You've allowed yourself to have feelings for him. Never mind how misplaced they might be...you've got them. Which means when it ends...and it will end...you're going to be hurt. It won't matter if you end it, or he's end it. You will end up hurt. I'll be there, though. To help pick up the pieces."

They came unbidden. Hateful tears. Dammit. She didn't want to cry. Wiping at them, she chokes back a sob. "Why? Why are you doing this to me? It won't work, Mark. We both know that. You and me...we don't work!"

"Maybe in the past we haven't...but whose to say we can't make it work now?" He demanded. "I love you...and I'm sitting here...telling you. Shouldn't that count for something?"

"I don't know," she sobs.

Wrapping his arms around her, he pulls her onto his lap. Smoothing her hair from her face, he kisses her forehead. "All I'm asking for is a chance. A chance to be the kind of man you could love...the kind of man you deserve. That's all I want Addie...just a chance."

"I don't know if I can," she whispers against his chest. It felt right, having his arms around her. She felt safe. Loved. "I want to, Mark. I do. God, you don't know how badly I do. I just don't know if I can."

He holds her tighter, nodding. "I'll just have to keep showing you, then. Until you know."