So it's been a while since my last update, hasn't it?

Anime Vegas was last weekend, so that's my only lame excuse, but I hope this chapter makes up for it

enjoy

Chapter 6

Loss

"Ouch." I hiss to myself for probably the tenth time since I started patching myself up. Hikari sat across from me on the couch, watching me with a hint of nervousness in her eyes.

These past few days have shown…quite the change in her. One minute she's hugging me, the next she's pounding Heartless into the ground an umbrella. Her eyes don't look so empty anymore, something's filling them back up again, bringing her back.

"I…," I hear her start softly and I pause, looking up at her in question. She swallows and looks at my hands. "I can help… If you'd like."

I blink. "You know how to do this stuff?" Inwardly I was relieved, I had no clue how to do any of this. And healing magic has all but failed. I must've been out of energy.

Hikari nods and scoots over on the table until she's right in front of me. She grabs the bandages and disinfectant lying beside her and starts to work her magic.

"I think… I think I was able to do this back in Xanoon," She started, seeming a little shaken by something. Did it disturb her? Remembering… Or maybe it's the blood. "I didn't see it in a memory, but… But I felt it."

"'Felt it'?" She nods and I lower my eyes. "I see… Well it's great that you're remembering more stuff now- just one step closer to getting you back home again!" I said with a grin and a part of my noticed her hold on the bandage around my arm slacken slightly, the other part feeling somewhat… Off.

Why did that part of me seem to not want her to leave? I've only known what she knows about herself for a few weeks. All we want is for her to get home, I have no ground to keep her here.

Then, my mom's words from this morning echo in my head.

"You don't have to know someone well to fall for them, Honey."

I inwardly sigh, then notice that Hikari still hadn't budged from her loose grip on the bandage and I glance at her. Her eyes look… Sad, somehow.

"Hikari?" I tap her hand and she flinches out of her thoughts, back to me again as she looks at me in question. The light's back in her eyes now. "Are you okay?"

She opens her mouth, but no sound comes out. She looks like she's trying to find the right words to say, and is failing. "I-" She swallows. "I'm okay. Sorry." Her voice loses all emotion in those words and she returns to her task. I blink.

"Well… Okay, if you say so." I had a feeling she wasn't "okay" after all.

But who was I to pry?

The clock read 11:38. My mom still wasn't home.

"She's really late, isn't she?" Hikari's voice breaks me from my thoughts. I turn to look at her, and she actually looks worried. If she even knows what worry is yet, anyway.

"Yeah," I sigh, then smile. "But she's okay. The Heartless were taken care of, so there won't be any more trouble for a while."

There's no response. I look at her again. Nothing. She looks like she's thinking about something.

"What are Heartless?" There it is.

"Oh! Right! I forgot you don't know about them yet," I say with a light chuckle. "Heartless are… Well, they're what happens to us when we die. Our heart goes away, but what's left becomes a Heartless. They're monsters that attack peoples' hearts. I guess… I guess it's like food for them."

I wondered for a moment if we'd run into any Nobodies, but then I immediately banished that thought away. No. Organization XIII was gone. Everyone. We're at least safe from them.

"I see…," Hikari mutters, playing with her hands almost absently. "Heartless are… Bad." I nod.

"Right! They're what you saw before," When I saw you fighting, I think, then blink. "By the way, how'd you fight like that anyway? Here you are with amnesia and you're fighting like you're a pro!" I make a punching motion but flinch back with a yelp when it reopens the cut on my arm. Hikari almost giggles, I think.

But then back to seriousness. "I'm not sure. I want to say it was a memory, but…," She pauses for a moment and lowers her head, her dark hair falling in her face. "It doesn't seem about right to call it that."

I scratch my head in thought. "Your life's pretty complicated, you know." I say and this time her lips tug upward in a slight smile, as if she's not sure that's the right gesture for her to use, but when I smile back, her own widens ever so slightly.

"I'm sorry. It must be a huge burden on you and your mother," Her voice lowers to just barely a whisper. "Amnesia isn't easy, yes, but with me? A complete stranger to everyone here? Seems… Worse." She says.

I frown. "Hikari, you're not a burden. We don't care that you're not from here, either. We just want to help, that's what we do," I turn to grin at her. Her eyes are wide. "Besides, we're friends, aren't we?"

"Friends," She whispers to herself, seemingly already remembering that we'd gone over the "friends" thing before. She smiles. "Yes, friends… I… Thank you. Thank you, Sora."

I swing an arm around her shoulders and pull her close with a laugh. "Not a problem!" I quickly stand up, ignoring the quick twinge of my wounds acting up. "I'll go make us some hot chocolate, okay? You want yours like before?" I ask and she pauses in thought, thinking about something and shaking her head of it.

"Yes." She nods and I grin, already walking into the kitchen.

"Great! Finally someone else who likes it like I do. Now I won't have to get as much crap from Riku anymore." I chuckle, heating up some water and getting little hot cocoa packets and everything else I needed.

I get no response from Hikari, but I figure she just can't hear me from over there.

After a few minutes, our drinks are finally ready. I grab both mugs by their handles and walk back into the living room. "Alright, two hot chocolates, right here! One for me, and one for-"

I stop short when I notice still no response from her- and I know why now.

She's asleep.

I can't help but smile at the sight of her eyes closed softly, her mouth slightly parted open and her small body curled up on one side. I sit beside her on the couch and pull a blanket around us. After all, there was only one blanket in the room, and I was cold too.

I sip my hot chocolate, Hikari's own sitting in front of her on the table. Her mouth is moving slightly in her sleep, small noises and words escaping her mouth.

Memory, or just a dream? I think. I partially hope it's the latter. These memories seem to be taking a toll on Hikari, after all. It's worrying.

Is this how it always is with amnesia?

"…ra."

"Sora… Home…"

I groan slightly at the voice echoing not far off and the shaking sensation I was getting.

"Sora? Honey?" The voice says again. "I'm home." They say sweetly. I open my eyes tiredly, wanting nothing more than to go back to sleep.

"Mom…?" I rub my eyes. There she is. Right in front of me, she's smiling too. Even though I knew there was a blanket over me, I felt warmer than I should've just from that. I wonder why. "You're home now?" I ask, now more awake.

She smiles at me. "Yup. They let me go back after all the patients we had were stabilized." She says, occasionally looking off to the side. I realized then that there was a heavy weight on my right side, all the way up to my shoulder. It restricts my movements when I go to stretch and I finally look over.

"U-Um…" Hikari's leaning against me in a deep sleep, letting out light sounds as she dreams. Or remembers. I think again.

I hear my mom laugh lightly. "I found you two curled up like that when I got home. I was going to just let you sleep," She pauses to look at me. "But I figured you'd want to know when I got back."" She says. Her jacket and shoes are already by the door. She probably got home at least a few minutes ago.

"Well there was only one blanket in here, so I-" The look in her eyes tells me to stop and I do, ending with a sigh. "Well it's true." I grumble, crossing my arms underneath the blanket.

My mom laughs again. "You're fine, Sora. I'm not here to judge," She leans forward and kisses my forehead lightly. I shake my head as she backs up and I'm glad that Hikari's asleep. "Goodnight, honey." She grins tiredly and walks off to her room, closing the door behind her.

I sit in silence for a few moments and then sigh. "Gimme a break already…"

I carefully shift my arm so as not to wake Hikari until I'm able to fold them behind my head. She falls slightly until she's sleeping on my chest. She doesn't even stir. I want to move over, but I can't really without her falling off the couch. I sigh lightly, ignoring the heat rising to my cheeks.

There's no harm in it, right? Not like I actually like her or anything. I mean… Like like her. The only person I've felt that way about is…

Kairi, right? A part of me wondered how she'd react to seeing me like this with Hikari. Would she be indifferent? Or would she get upset?

I banish that thought immediately. There's no way. Kairi doesn't feel that way about me, not at all. Except…

Except the way she acted when I finally found her again in the World That Never Was. At the time I think… I might've had a feeling she did, after all. But now, with all the danger gone, everything's back to normal. It's almost like nothing ever changed.

Aside from the Heartless showing up again.

What could've happened to bring them back here? Donald, Goofy and I put a stop to everything back there, we were sure of it. It's almost like everything just decided to change to moment Hikari came here.

She couldn't… Have anything to do with it, could she?

No. It can't be. From the things she's remembered so far, she just isn't that kind of person. She had been working to make her home a free one. At least… That how it seems, from what she can tell. Are the rebels she joined really good people? Do they have some ulterior motive that she doesn't know yet?

And did this all really change with Hikari's arrival? Or could it go even deeper? Maybe that dream I had a while back… I can barely remember it, now that I think about it. I think… I was fighting someone, I don't know who it was though, and then there was a girl's voice. Her voice…

It sounds a little like Hikari's.

I shake my head free of the thought. It's been so long since that dream, there's no way I can even remember it so clearly. It's just because I met her on the same day, that's all.

"So…" I'm shaken by Hikari's voice and I glance down as she starts to shift over off my chest, propping herself up on shaky hands. Her eyes crack open almost unwillingly and rubs them with one hand, her other weakly falling under the shift and she falls back down, had I not caught her carefully.

"Hikari? Whoa," I chuckle, though a little startled by her behavior. She lets out a shaky breath and finally rubs her eyes free of the tired need to close again. She doesn't bother lifting herself up again though. "You alright?" I ask.

She looks at me in question. Her eyes have a haze about them, as if she's not really aware of what's going on. Though, when she blinks a few times, it clears up a little.

"You…," She starts, then she lifts herself up finally. Her hands aren't as shaky anymore either. "I'm okay. What… What happened?" She asks, sitting up now and rubbing the sleep out of her eyes again, the blanket having already fallen off her shoulders.

I blink, taking her actions in for a moment. "You fell asleep a while ago, that's all. Um…," I pause for a moment, wondering whether or not I should ask after all, I shake my doubts away. "Are you sure you're okay? You looked a little… Out of it. Was it something you dreamed about?" I ask. She cocks her head to the side, her hair sliding over her shoulders.

"Dream…?" I mentally slapped myself. Right. She knows a different kind of "dream".

"It's uh… Different. The other kind of dream is what we see in our sleep." I say. She pauses for a moment in thought.

"Are those… My memories, too?" She asks hesitantly, as if afraid if what she dreamt about was true. Just what did she see?

"Sort of. A dream is fake. Like… Nothing ever makes sense in a dream. Normal things could be floating or something, stuff that wouldn't normally happen does- kinda like that." I say, hoping I make some sense to her.

"Oh…" She breathes. I cock my head to the side, leaning forward to get a better look at her face. She seems to be in deep thought.

"So… Was it a dream? Or a memory?" I ask. She bites her lip.

"I think… A dream." She mutters, though there's a flicker of something else in her voice, perhaps hoping it was a dream and not reality? An involuntary shudder racks her thin body and I frown.

I want to ask what it was about, but I decide against it. Something flashes in her eyes when I open my mouth to speak, but it's gone as soon as I close it again. Instead I sigh, and stand up from the couch, Hikari half watching me, and half staring off into space.

"You still want that hot chocolate?" I ask and she just blinks. "I mean, you fell asleep before you could have the first one, and I'm just gonna guess it's a bit cold by now." I point to the cup still sitting on the table in front of her and she lets out a small sigh at the sight. I can't help but chuckle lightly.

I reach a hand out to her and she almost seems to flinch at the sudden movement. She looks up at me and I smile. "Come on, there's no going back to sleep now; I know that much."

She pauses, then actually smiles back- a somewhat forced one, I might add- and she grabs my hand, just as I move to pull her up with an okay from her.

I'm starting to wonder if remembering her past is truly a good thing or not- it's hurting her, isn't it? It shouldn't do that, it's not fair. Maybe…

Maybe she doesn't have to remember.

Maybe, together, we can change her into a whole new person. Not the orphan girl who lost most of her family to a war and joined the fight, but the newest resident of Destiny Islands looking for a new life.

Would it be good for her? Better than remembering a troubled past that made me sick to my stomach at the constant battles in her home world? Or would it hurt her even more somehow? To become someone completely different from the person you still don't fully remember- not even their name…

It's not my place to say, but maybe she'd at least hear me out. But not right now. The way she is right now… She might get mad at me.

If she knows how to get angry yet, anyway.

"Sora?"

Her voice breaks my thought process and I blink. "Huh? What is it?" I ask. How long have we been in the kitchen?

"I think… That's enough whipped cream." She says and I frown, looking down to find a familiar can of cream in my hand…

And a mess that was once a hot chocolate on the table, the cream having towered high and fell down in clumps.

"Ah!" I yelp and I accidentally drop the can on the floor, already scrambling to gather the whipped mess on the table. "Shit! I-I uh- Wait! Whipped cream- no!" I cry out as the tower of cream falls from the mug and all over the table and the floor.

I barely register a growing sound of laughter in front of me. "Hikari! Quit laughing at me and just help me out here! I-" I pause. She's laughing. Laughing. And hard, too. She wraps her arms around her stomach as she continues to laugh more than I'd ever seen from anybody, tears are even threatening to fall due to still not stopping. I take that moment to grin.

"Alright, I see how it is," She pauses just a little to look at me in question. She's covering her mouth as she continues to laugh at me. "If you wanna laugh, might as well give me a reason to laugh too!" I take a big glop of whipped cream and throw it at her face like I would a baseball.

It hits home. Silencing her, if only for a few moments.

Small clumps of cream drip down her chin to the floor, some landing on her chest. Her eyes are wide with surprise. I'm already cracking up.

"Hi-Hikari! I-" I can barely talk now as I'm overcome with laughter almost as much as she was before.

"Okay," She says, walking over to me. The slight glow in her eyes shows she understands. She takes a handful of cream and rubs it all over my face, only making me crack up even more, though still in shock that she even did it. "So like this, then?"

She's just doing as I do, I know that. But I can't help but feel like this is her too. She's even laughing alongside me still. To hear her laugh like this... I actually never thought of her gaining back her humanity, just her memories. But now that we're outside of that, I don't know…

I kind of want to stay right here.

I ignore every deep thought, every doubt and every worry and ache for this time. And I take that time to toss as much whipped cream at Hikari as I can to win this little game.

"Comin' at ya!" I give little warning, since I threw it just as I start to speak. All of her efforts to dodge were in vain.

She just laughs and throws more my way, I grin wide and duck behind the table just in time. I jump back up and throw another, but this time, Hikari sidesteps out of the way just time. Except...

She slips and falls to the ground.

"Whoa!" I start, still chuckling just a bit as I hurry over to her. Her face is all red and her back is probably covered in whipped cream by now. "You alright, Hikari?" I ask.

She blinks at me and nods. "Y-Yes... Didn't see where I was going." She says as she sits up, her laughter having nearly subsided now. I grin down at her.

"Yeah, I see that," I laugh again as she shakes her head randomly, maybe to rid herself of dizziness or something. "Come on, we should probably clean this stuff up now. I don't know about you, but I don't want a scolding from my mom about whipped cream, of all things." I say and extend a hand out to her. She nods again and takes my hand and lets me pull her up to her feet again.

Though, I feel a spark of something traveling up my arm at her touch and I have to jerk back as soon as she's upright. She glances at my confused expression, but that's all. What was that...?

"You're right."

"Hurry it up, -, we've already wasted enough time in here as it is." A girl hisses to the familiar black-haired boy. She's wearing clothes similar to the ones Hikari had seen herself wearing in her last flashback. The boy is still wearing the same clothes as well... Is this from the same night?

"Alright, alright. Chill out for a sec, will ya? I'm just getting as much supplies as I can carry. Hey -," He pauses to look toward wherever Hikari's past self must be standing. She still can't hear that word. "How we looking out there?"

Suddenly her vision shifts to a wide, classy-looking hallway. She looks down one end, and then the other. Each side is vacant. Though that doesn't seem to soothe the tightening in her chest.

"We're clear." She says. The other girl standing beside the black-haired boy crosses her arms impatiently. Her long hair nearly covers her right eye, so dark in this lighting it almost looks as black as night, but she had a feeling it wasn't so. Her grey eyes feel like they can shoot daggers anyone she pleases. She wears a black long sleeve shirt with shoulder guards, a belt holding up a pair of dark cargo pants with knee guards and khaki combat boots.

She looks like she's trying to shoot those daggers at Hikari now.

Hikari feels her eyebrow raise and the girl starts to walk toward her, the black-haired boy completely oblivious as he throws more things into his backpack.

"Can I help you?" Hikari hears herself sneer at the girl as she leans against the wall across from her.

"You seem awfully distracted tonight, -," The girl says, glancing at the boy and back to her, towards the hallway. "Something on your mind? Or are you just that bad of a Rebel?"

Hikari's eyes widen and she steps back, taking a moment to regain her composure. "I don't have to answer to you." She says and lowers her head, her hair falling in her eyes.

The girl opens her mouth to speak again, but is cut off when the black-haired returns to their side, grinning wide.

"Alright, let's head out. Is the coast still clear?" He asks Hikari's past self. Just as she turns her head toward the hallway, the other girl peers over first and steps outside the doorway.

"We're good. Let's get back to HQ before the next patrol comes around. We got...," She pauses to check a small watch on her wrist. Her eyes widen. "Shit, only a minute. Let's move!" She whispers sharply to the two and the boy jumps out next.

"Gotcha," He makes to run after the girl, but pauses to grab Hikari's hand as she walks out as well. "C'mon, we're almost home free, -."

Hikari feels herself smile and squeezes his hand. "Right."

"Hurry up! Move it!" The girl hisses and they both nod, already running up to her. She's stopped by the last doorway leading to a courtyard of sorts. She glances outside just as two guards pass. One of them darts their head over and Hikari can see their eyes widen in surprise at seeing them there.

"Intruders! Alert the rest of the Guard! High level securi-" He doesn't get to finish that sentence as the black-haired boy jumps forward and knocks him out with a swing of the butt of his gun. Hard. The guard is out like a light.

"Take him out!" The girl yells to them as the other guard gets into a stance with his sword and shield.

"Already on it." Hikari hears herself mutter, jumping forward and taking her gun out of its holster. The guard pauses and the grip he has on his sword slackens a little bit. Hikari raises a brow at him in confusion but her black-haired friend doesn't seem to notice.

"Man, talk about old-fashioned! A sword and shield, and chivalrous? You can't write this stuff!" He laughs and pulls out a small dagger, slowly making his way around the guard. But the guard's eyes weren't on him.

They were on Hikari.

"Well?" She hears herself start in a taunting manner. "You gonna attack or stand there gaping?" But it was useless. Either this guy was scared, or... There was something else at play here.

"-..." He mutters and Hikari's body freezes where she stands. The black-haired boy's eyes widen considerably. What? Who is it?

"Come on!" The other Rebel girl yells to them. "Just get rid of him and we can get back!"

Hikari's hands holding the gun are trembling as the guard stands and removes his helmet. Even Hikari herself- the one watching her memories unfold- is stricken with... Something she still can't understand. That sandy hair, those eyes that are just like hers...

"-...?" Her voice is barely a whisper.

It's her brother. Hikari's present self just wants to slap herself now. How could she already forget his voice so quickly?

"-... What- Is this-" He takes a step toward her, as does the black-haired boy, just in case. "What're you doing with the Rebels?" There's something in his eyes. It's making them dim, but also making them shine- with what seems to be tears threatening to break free.

"-... No, I-"

"What were you thinking? And you too -," He gestures to the black-haired boy who takes a step back from him. "Why would you-" He breaks off into a strangled cry of pain.

Any other words said would be useless now.

Because the other Rebel girl just stabbed him in the back.

Everything seems to be going in slow motion. The boy draws out a sharp gasp as her brother falls. The girl pulls out her dagger and wipes the blood off with his shirt. Hikari watches in disbelief as her hands let the gun fall.

"Well? C'mon you two, the coast is clear now- we have to go!" And with that she's gone.

"-..." The boy stutters, Hikari's body is slowly staggering toward the unmoving one of her brother.

"No... N-No...," Her hands turn the body over. There's blood all over, staining his uniform and probably the inside of his armor, too. She pulls herself close to him. "This can't... Be happening..."

There's a hand on her shoulder. The black-haired boy. "I'm sorry, -..." He mutters. She hears herself laugh. But it sounds fake.

"'Sorry'? Why? This isn't you...," She says, something blurs her vision- tears- as she looks at the rapidly cooling body. His chest is starting to glow a bright white. "This is me... M-My fault." She curses herself.

"None of this is your fault, okay?" The boy kneels beside her ad smiles at her gently, his hand never leaving her shoulder. They both turned their heads at the sound of yelling and footsteps nearby.

The boy gets up, his knees bent so he's still close to Hikari's level. "Shit, the Guard is getting close. We gotta go -," He reaches a hand out to her. "Come on."

She glances at her brother just as the light floats up from his chest, leaving a small heart to float up to the sky before them. "But..."

The boy just reaches and grabs her hand tightly. "We can't bring him with us -, there's no time! I'm sorry, but we have to go- now." He says, already beginning to pull her up along with him. Her brother's head thus falls out of her lap and hits the ground lightly.

The Guard gets closer as they make a run for it, going as fast as their legs will take them, and as far as the boy plans to pull her along.

She runs, but she's broken inside, Hikari can feel it... It's very painful.

Her brother is dead.

I shoot up from my bed with a yelp, my hand outstretched to nothing. I could feel sweat dripping down my neck.

"Wha..." I breathe, lowering my hand and running the other through my hair.

"Did I just...," I pause to glance at the clock. Six a.m. "See some of Hikari's memories...?"

Hmm...not sure if asshole... or just lover of drama...meh

so what'd you think? good? bad? rushed? idk?

REVIEW BEFORE FAVING/FOLLOWING PLEASE

thank you