A Typical
Day in High School
Chapter 6
SilverGuy11(wow that's new): we're gonna have a good time this chapter, cause its the weekend! no seriously, it's the weekend and that means two days of no school! oh! But onto the story.
Disclaimers(that's new too): Dave C. Lovelace and Idiotmagnet productions invent the costumes in this story, except for the pink one and the light blue one. I'm just borrowing it for a humorous chapter. Oh and Rocketman belongs to Elton John, I just twisted the words around a bit..well, a lot
Ahh, Saturday morning, full of cartoons, fun times, and show making! And today is no exception. That's actually the high point of this seemingly short chapter. Not that, so much as what happens when the show goes Net live ... We start our day off like any other Saturday: groggy, tired and somewhat on crack. Or so it was for this bunch of main characters...
"I got up early. Morning time, pre breakfast. Zero hour. 9 A.M. And I'm gonna be,...laughing my ass off. Somehow I can just feel it." a lazy Silver said/sung as he made his way to the shower. His roommate, which it seems that Silver has forgotten he has, was still trying to get those few more hours of sleep that all people crave on Saturday.
"And I think it must've been a long, long time, till life brings me back again to find. I'm not the ass people think I am, no, no! No, no! I'm a B-" But we don't get to hear the rest of Silver's song, unfortunately, because at the moment of cutoff, a pillow was stuffed into his singing hole by..., yup, good ol' reliable J.
"Good, you finally shut the fuck up. How can I get my beauty rest if you're here singing like a fag singing, horribly at that." she said.
"'Phoo'. Like I had a choice, and you must be deaf. And, judging by the way you look, I'd say you'd need about several milleniums more 'beauty rest'." Silver said after he spit the pillow out of his mouth.
"What do you mean? I look just fine."
"Suuuure you do. If that's what you call 'fine', I don't wanna see fucked up, then." He handed Jelea a mirror. To her horror, she saw Silver was telling the truth. Hair was all over her reflection, nearly blocking the view. Which could've been a good thing, because that's not all. Dried drool was around the corners of her mouth. Crust was in her eyes. And most importantly, not a trace of makeup was found in this reflection. Then again, that's normal, since most people don't go to sleep with makeup on, anyway.
"This isn't happening. This can't happen! Not to me!" Jelea screamed.
"Actually, it can. It's what happens every day when you wake up. but then again, you wouldn't know, since you don't look at yourself until after you've 'freshened up' or whatever you females call trying to look nice." Silver told her.
"You lie! You must be lying!"
"Ahh, and yet, I'm not."
"Stop lying to me!"
"(groan) Fine. Why don't you look in the mirror again? Mirrors don't lie. They're not living"
"I can't. It's too demeaning. I'll just have to take your word for it. (sobbing)"
3 minutes of crying later...
"Now if you're done moping at how you'd look worse than Amy in comparison, I have to get ready." Silver said.
"For what?" Jelea asked. Surprising that there wasn't any outburst from the comparison thing.
"You haven't heard? Me and the others were gonna film a new show with my new video camera."
"What's it called, and how come I didn't hear about this?"
"Truth, Dare, Double Dare, Promise, Fuck or Suck, and we did. Sonic sent you a e-mail yesterday. But it doesn't matter now cause you know. So get cleaned up. We have 12 hours to think of the different dares and other stuff." Silver explained as he went to the shower again. He continued the song where he left off. "I'm a Bitch Fucker. Bitch Fucker, making them bitches moan, alone!"
"Please don't tell me you came up with that song..." Jelea pleaded.
"It wasn't just me, Tai came up with the last part. This song is gonna be one of the dares on the show." Silver half yelled over the noise of the shower.
'Wow, that's a surprise...' Jelea thought to herself.
10:30 A.M.
And moving on to Sonic and Shadow's room! They're both awake, and Amy, Rouge, Cream, Tails, and Rya were in there also. But trying to make something...
Sonic and Shadow were watching the Web-popular cartoon Retarded Animal Babies, getting ideas for Truth, Dare, Double Dare, Promise, Fuck or Suck
"I got it! One of the dares could be that two girls have to do cunnilingus!" Sonic exclaimed. This could show he was watching RAB 10, what with that part when the real Puppy and Internet Puppy were sucking each others' dick in a 69 position. Guess he figured that if girls did it it would make the show more interesting. Tails had a look of disgust on his face as well as Rya.
"What?" everyone else asked, except Tails.
"I could demonstrate…but I'll need two female participants." Sonic said. No one stepped up. After several more seconds, Rouge said she'd go first.
"Good, now if another girl will step up." Sonic persuaded. Silver and Jelea stepped in the room, followed by Tai and Shear.
"Perfect!" Sonic exclaimed. He pulled Jelea over to where Rouge was standing.
"OK. First, get into a 69 position."
"Could someone tell me what's going on here?" Jelea asked.
"Sonic's teaching us what cunnilingus is." Cream told her
"Cunniwha?" Jelea asked in confusion.
"Cun-ni-lin-gus" Sonic pronounced.
Silver and Tai thought on this word for a moment. Then the meaning of it came into memory. Silver also had a look on disgust on his face, eventually fading back to his normal indifferent expression so as not to give away that he knew. But Tai just watched, at some point turning into a lifeless stare, like he was looking at porn or something else involving naked woman doing "things" in front of a camera. "This should be good" Tai said. Back to Sonic…
"Now as I was saying, first you need to get into a 69 position." Sonic explained again.
"Which is…?" Rouge and Jelea asked.
"First, one of you lay down on the floor." Rouge laid down on the floor, then Sonic continued.
"Now Jelea, you lay down on top of Rouge, but your legs should be spread in front of Rouge's face." Still having no idea where this was going, Jelea did what Sonic said.
"This is the penultimate step, or next-to-last for you slow people. Now Rouge, you spread your legs out." Sonic said. Rouge and Jelea were still puzzled as to where this is going, so again they did what Sonic said.
'Something about this doesn't look right...' Cream thought.
'I wonder if I'm the only one who thinks this doesn't look right.' Amy thought.
'I wonder why this is taking so long...' Tai accidentaly said out loud telepathically.
'How did I know you knew...' Silver answered telepathically.
'Go fuck off would ya? Sonic needs to learn the hard way.' Tai said mentally.
'You mean so you can start jerkin' off?'
'Duh.'
'Whatever, you masturbating bastard. You're just pissed 'cause you can't get a girl'
'STFU.' Tai finished as he stopped speaking telepathically.
"The only thing left to do now is to tickle and/or lick each others' pussy." Sonic said innocently. Both Rouge's and Jelea's faces turned red at hearing this. And then….
SMACK!
Poor little Sonic got bitch slapped. POW, right in the kisser! After finally figuring out what cunnilingus is, Cream felt sick, Amy was surprised Sonic would think of putting that on tape, Rya somehow crossed the room and ended up hugging Silver in fear and distrust of Sonic, Tai and Shear were disappointed, and Tails nearly passed out, almost seeing such an action in real life.
"What the fuck is wrong with you? We can't put that on the Internet!" Jelea screamed at Sonic as she slapped him some more.
"I could expect this from Tai, but you're supposed to set an example, that there can be shows where anything goes and still not be XXX." Rouge also screamed.
"Did you hear one word you just said," Sonic replied. "ANYTHING GOES, meaning ANYTHING can happen. No wonder you can't pass English."
"Um, hi, hello, who do you think came up with that? Can't be Sonic, he's too articulated and 'honest' as you people call it. I bet Sonic to suggest that for $100. I'm surprised that you even made it into high school after hearing that." Tai said.
"We hardly ever learn anything anyway." Cream piped up.
"Besides learning how to entertain people in a completely indecent way, anyway." Tails added. "Which reminds me, why do I even come here?"
"Because you'd be bored at home for a whole 200 something days, that's why." Sonic said.
"And now I just made $100. Pay up!" Sonic said. Tai gave Sonic $100. Sonic started leaving.
"Where're you going?" Silver asked in an insincere tone, Rya hugging him even more from when Sonic walked past.
"To the costume store. For when the show starts." was all Sonic said before he left.
"What is he talking about?" Amy asked.
"It's a surprise…"Silver said. "Didn't you just ask where's he going? How can you say 'It's a surprise' like you know or something." everyone else asked.
"Uhhhhhhaaaaaaa...where's Knuckles' lazy ass at? He hasn't been around since, what, yesterday morning. How long can a person sleep?" Just as Silver said this, Knuckles came into the room.
"Am I late?" he asked. The others just stared, eventually looking mad. They stared at him with anger flaring like an angry woman...like an angry wo-mannnn.
"What'd I do?"
"What do you mean 'What'd I do?' ? You've been sleep for about 25 fucking hours, that's 'What you did?'!" Rouge yelled at him.
"Oh. So why are we still here doing nothing?" Knuckles asked.
"Cause Sonic hasn't got back with the costume supplies yet. Duh." The others said.
When Sonic gets back with the costume supplies………
There was a one piece black latex costume, a red cape, two letter F's with a red border, a raccoon-esque face mask, a one piece light blue suit, a whole mess of condoms, a big purple tube, a upside-down heart shape purple bottom to go with the purple tube, a head thingy in the shape of the top of a penis, a semi cape thingy with a P on the bottom, a big pair of underwear, a pair of ultra-small pink shorts, a small pink and white shirt, a pink cape, a thong, and an automatic gun.
"What the hell are we gonna do with this?" Tai asked.
"Make hilarious, rep-threatening costumes, duh." Sonic said.
Silver examined the supplies closely. They seemed familiar to him somehow. Then he remembered. Two of them were from Retarded Animal Babies 4.
"Um, Sonic, two of these costumes wouldn't happen to be Purple Penis and The Fucking Fucker, would it?" Silver asked.
"Yes." Sonic replied.
"Oh. Well, I guess we better get started then. Rya and me will work on Purple Penis. Sonic and Shear, you guys start on the Fucking Fucker. Tails and Cream, see if you can come up with something from the light blue suit and the condoms. And finally, Amy, Knuckles and Rouge, use what's left to make a fourth costume. Tai, come up with some more dares." Silver said.
"Can't we pick our own partners?" the others asked.
"No time. It's already 1 P.M. And who knows how long it'll take to make these. There's only 8 hours left, plus we still have to find things for people to suck on if they pick Suck, and things to fuck if they pick Fuck. And on top of that, there's still the matter of coming up with an hours' worth of dares." Silver told them.
"I never thought of it that way. We really don't have much time." Tails said.
"I just said th-.'sigh' Never mind…." The soon-to-be-stars started making the costumes. But then Silver felt something around his waist. He looked down to see Rya.
"Uh, Rya. As flattering as this is, you can let go of me now. Although why you did still escapes me." Silver said.
"Oh, sorry, hehe."
Silver put the head thingy in the shape of the top of a penis on the big purple tube, using super glue to make sure it won't fall off. Rya put the upside-down heart shape purple bottom with the other end of the tube. Next they put the semi cape thingy with a P on the bottom on the headpiece, super gluing it to make sure it didn't fall off. And finally, Silver put the underwear on the upside-down heart shape thingy. This took about five minutes. Silver decided to put the costume on.
"Behold, for I am...Purple Penis! I penetrate the mightiest of fortresses! " Silver said, quoting the entrance line of Purple Penis from RAB 4. This made the others laugh. Then again, who wouldn't laugh at a talking cock?
Sonic took the one-piece black latex costume and the red cape, and Shear grabbed the two letter F's with a red border and the eye mask. Sonic got some thread and a needle out of nowhere and started stitching the cape around the head hole on the costume. Then Shear took the two red-bordered F's and glued them a little below the head hole. This also took about five minutes.Taking a page from Silver, Sonic also put on the newly created costume. Sonic had never seen RAB 4, so he just made something up.
"Now you all suffer the wrath, of The Fucking Fucker! I have the ability to fuck anything, and can never get STDs!" Sonic said. His exclamation made the others laugh so hard that there were props given out.
"HA HA HA,...HA! Oh, oh man! That is too damn funny! I gotta write that down!" Tai tried to say in between sudden shortages of oxygen from laughing too hard.
"Say it...haha...again, say it again..! I gotta record this as a...ha...commercial to fill in time. You too, Silver. We need as many commercials as we can get, hahahahahahaha." Tails said as he was holding a mini video camera.
"OK. I'm not sure what this is gonna help with, but whatever." Sonic said.
He and Silver put the costumes back on and said their opening lines again, this time with Tails using the mini video camera to record it. After that, Cream and Tails took the condoms and light blue suit to see what they could come up with.
'Hmmm...I could use some of these later on in this story.' Tails thought to himself. He snuck three of the condoms into his pocket secretely.
"What should we call this costume, Tails?" Cream asked.
Tails was caught in a daze, stuck on a mental clip of what would be happenning while using two of the three condoms he snuck away.
"Tails. Tails?" Cream said, trying to snap him back into reality.
"Don't worry, I got this." Silver said. "J, get over here. I got an idea." As usual of having no idea of where this was going, she came over to where Silver and Tails was.
"OK. First, put your ass on top of Tails' face." Silver said.
"What! I'm not doing that!" Jelea said in protest.
"Fine. If we don't have a cameraman, then this will be your fault for the school and all the Internet not having a laugh-your-ass-off weekend show. And for making Sonic blow thorugh about $500 on the real estate, props, and the costumes." Silver told her.
"Hold up. WHAT? I've been using credit all day! I can't pay off that much! Oh GOD, I'm freaking dead!" Sonic screamed as he started panicking.
"Calm down, would you. I gave you my card. It doesn't affect me much 'cause I'm loaded."
"Ugh, whatever. But you do realize you owe me 7 favors for this, right?" Jelea said.
"Right, as preusual." he assured her.
Jelea half-sat on Tails' face. He started to smile, and eventually started to attempt to feel on her ass.
"OK, that phase is done. Now turn around with your tities in position where his hands are going." Silver instructed.
"Now you owe me 14 favors." Jelea reminded him. Trying not to look, she did what Silver said, and just as anyone could possibly predict, Tails grabbed Jelea's um, big rack, so to speak. Whether Silver wanted this to happen or not, it was Tails's turn to get bitch slapped.
"Yo what the...?" was all Tails said before he fully regained consciousness. When he did, he saw a pair of tits staring him in the face."What happened?" he asked.
"You wasted five minutes daydreaming about something, now currently 1:15 pm." Knuckles said.
"Oh, that's it? I thought I did something wrong." Tails said.
"In a way, you did. But not in an improtant way." Rya said.
"Oh. Wait! Cream, I got an idea on what the costume can be from my daydream." Tails said as he looked at the one piece costume and the condoms. Tails went to his room, and came back with a big sack. He put the condoms in the sack, then stapled part of the opening to the left sleeve.
"Ho ho ho! I am Safta Claus, offering uncomparable protection to all girls and boys on Protecmas." He demonstrated the meaning and simple ability of Safta Claus by giving the others a free condom. Comments of "No", "No thanks" and "Don't need it" were all jumbled at once. The only difference was Tai when he said "Can I have more?".
"All that's left to do is make the last costume. But what could possibly be made out of a pair of very small pink shorts, a small pink and white breast shirt, a pink cape, a thong, and an automatic gun?" Knuckles asked. Seeing that Knux was actually right about something for once in hs life without question made Amy and Rouge feel a little retarded, and confused at the same time.
"A very good question. What can be made?" Amy asked. About five seconds later, Sonic went rushing out of the room and magically came back with a female wax figure.
"May I ask what are you doing?" Rouge said quizically.
"Trying out an idea, what else?" Sonic answered. He put the shirt on the breasts of the wax figure, then the shorts over where the genitalia would be, and finally the cape.
"Okay, so you dressed up your wax sex doll Sonic, so what?" Silver said plainly.
"I ain't done yet." Sonic said. He examined the figure again. Sonic had a frown on his face, soon turning into a smile. He took the shorts off, and used a pair of scissors to cut a hole in between where the legs would be, finally putting them back on. Then he put the thong on the figure's head. Sonic ended with placing the automatic gun in between the arms of it.
"I give you,...Orgasm Girl! Forcing orgasms on girls everywhere, or else you'll get shot in your vagina." Sonic said in a narrator-type voice.
"Isn't Oragsm Girl a game on Newgrounds? You can't call it that on the Internet. Newgrounds is on the Internet, duh." Tai said.
"How would you know?" Sonic said.
"Cause it's a free way to know how to cause orgasms, dumbass. That, and looking at anime porn." Tai answered him.
"You're sick, you know that?" Amy and Rya said at the same time.
"Yes. Cause I choose to be sick. It what makes me 'me'. that's how the author invisioned me to be." Tai said.
"Can we get back on topic!" Silver half yelled. Sonic, Amy, Rya and Tai shut up. "Thank you. While you were arguing for no reason, it seems you've failed to realize that we finished all the costumes."
"So? That was the easiest part." (inserrt person here) said.
"Which is exactly why we need to focus all our attention on what's left to do."
The next several hours were spent thinking up dares, rehearsing, setting up the video stream to play on the school website via hacking and other crap like that...and now we fast-forward to 2 minute before showtime.
"Chop chop, people. Show time's in less than a minute. Does everyone remember their lines?" Sonic directed.
"You say that like this was your idea." Shear said.
"You don't know that. It just might've been. You never know." Sonic replied.
"Oh God, not again." Silver said silently.
"Can we please focus here? We're on in 1 minute." Tails asked politely.
"Fine, fine...whatever." Sonic and Shear said.
"When do I go on stage?" Tai asked eagerly.
"Uhhhh...wait, wait...hold on...I got nothin'." Tails replied quizzically.
"Silly Tails, Tai is the headliner,...remember?" Rya said while winking an eye at Tails.
"Hu...Oh, yeah, that's right. You're the headliner." Tails told Tai.
"Shweet! Uh, hey, when's the headliner go on?"
"The headliner goes on first and makes a sh..." Jelea began to explain before Sonic interjected.
":Places, people, places. We go on in 30. Knux, work the camera. Cream, get the costumes ready. Rouge, get the Suck objects. Amy, Jelea, Rya, find the people and/or Fuck objects. Tails, get the Dare cards." Sonic barked. And for some reason, they actually did what Sonic told them to do.
"Aw yeah! I don't have to do shit!" Shear exclaimed.
"Actually...yeah, you do. You're gonna be the host for the Fuck or Suck segment." Sonic told him, crushing any dreams Shear had of being the only person to watch the show live and in person.
"So what do I do?" Shadow asked sarcastically.
"Yes. And what do I do, O swami ?" Silver said afterward.
"You're gonna keep watch in the principal's office and make sure no one goes in during the streaming." Sonic told him.
"Why Ms.Y's computer. You could've just used the laptops in the computer lab." Silver told him.
"And why do you need two people to keep watch in the first place?" Shadow asked.
"Huh? Ohhhh fuck. Now I gotta go..." Sonic tried to say until...
"NO TIME!" Tails yelled in Sonic's ear with a megaphone.
"What the hell was that f..."
"WE GO ON IN 5, 4, 3, 2,..."
"Goooood evening. Is everyone ready for some of those hi-larious dares?" Tai said for his opening statment. Of course this was an Internet show, so there won't be any cheering or anything like that.
"We have a glorious show for you tonight, that'll make you laugh your ass off as much as kids hate Michael Jackson. Our first segment is 'Strictly Dares'. Here's that kitsune who uses his tails to keep women coming back for more, Tails!"
"Thanks Tom, uh Tai. Our first brave volunteer/sex slave is a fine lady we picked up off the street who says to all the guys out there that her bra size is betwen triple F and double G." Tails stated. "And here she comes now." Everything Tails said came walking on set in the form of a woman that had everything a man could want: huge rack, big back, and always wants to be fucked. Although once her face was shown, Knuckels started feeling sick, accidentally showing her face for a full 5 seconds before immedieatedly panning back to Tails.
"OK first contestant, here's your first Dare. But before we do that, you can choose to do a Double Dare." Tails said. Luckily for the viewers safe in their dorms, Knux cut off her face as she shook her head no.
"Now for the dare. I dare you to pick one of our male cast members except meand give him the night of his sex life...on stage!" the two tailed fox said. Sonic and Shear hid behind the stage. Knuckles had to man the camera.Tails wasn't available, and Silver and Shadow were safe in the school rewiring the camera Knuckles was using toa laptop in the computer lab. Which causes one to wonder how is this still being shown online. A second video camera was already hooked up to a laptop already in case this happened. "So it seems our lucky castmember is...Tai!" Tails said out loud. Tai, who was watching the show with his PDA when Tails said the dare, didn't know what his potential sex slave's face looked like. Tai took the stage, marching in for some strange reason.
"Here I am, sex slav..." Tai started to say until he saw her face. "WHAT THE FUCK MAN!"
As an added joke, Tails found a big dictionary and put it on a desk. "Do you, uh, whatever your name is, take Tai to be your unofficially lawfully wedded husband?" Tails asked.
"Yes." she said.
"And do you, Tai, take what's-her-name to be your unofficially lawfully wedded wife?"
"FUCK NO, YOU CRACK-INDUCED FURRY FAGGOT!"
Tails had an angry look on his face. "Then reguardless of your answer, you may now kiss and fuck your bride."
"I don't think so. I'll just take the consequence of not doing the dare." Tai said after calming down.
"OK, but I'm not sure you'll like the consequence. Instead of doing a live porno, your consequence will be that she has to give you a blowjob for a full minute...with-OUT cumming." Tails said. "Well, how hard can that be?" Tai said somewhat confidently, that is, until his partner dragged him off stage, eventually going far away from the set. I'll elaborate on the result in the next chapter.
"And our next contestants, who we got all the way from the Mushroom Kingdom...Mario and Luigi, along with their girlfriends Peach and Daisy!" Tails said, trying to cheer himself up after seeing Tai dragged away by a hooker.
"Because there's two sets of contestants, this will be a Double Dare. Mario & Luigi vs. Peach & Daisy. Are you ready?"
"Of a-course. Piece of cake." Mario and Luigi said respectively. "Yes." both Daisy and Peach said.
"Your dare is...a go kart drift race?" Tails said, looking surprised.
"Yeah, we're a gonna beat you easy! My speed is way better than yours." Luigi said excitedly.
"What good is that if your drift sucks?" Peach asked him.
"Calm down, you two. Natural abilities of your standard karts don't matter. You can only use the special karts from Mario Kart DS." Tails explained.
"Only special?..." Mario said with a hint of fear in his voice.
"Only special? Oh, now I KNOW we're gonna win now. One of my specials has maxxed out drift." Daisy said with confidence.
"BUT, you can't use your own specials. Meaning Peach can't use her own specials OR Daisy's specials because they're on the same team. Same for Mario and Luigi." Tails said.
Luigi decided to pick the Dry Bomber, and Mario picked the Cucumber. Peach picked the Poltergust 4000, and Daisy used the Egg 1. Tails directed them over to the course. It started out with a straight away, going into a tear shaped turn, leading into another tear shaped turn, going into a small turn that led out to a slightly curved straight away, which connected with a lollipop turn, going into 5 tear shaped turns in succession, which leads into a trick lowercaseY turn, going into a 3D spring turn, finally leading to the final straight away with the finish line at the end.
"You have 12 minutes to make it to the end. If the twelve minutes is up and no one crosses, the first person to cross the finish linewins. No items.Whichever team loses will hold the title of genital herpes for two months in the Mushroom Kingdom. Just know only one of your team members needs to pass the finish line for that team to win. The track is 45 miles long." Tails explained. "On your mark, get set, GO!"
NOTE: all cars go at 45 mph, and each bigparagraph is 3 minutes.
All participants picked high acceleration cars, but Luigi's had maxxed out accel, so his shot out in front. Daisy's car's accel nearly matched Luigi's, so she was about two cars behind him. Mario's car had slightly better accel than Peach, so they were about side to side. The first turn was coming up. None of the cars had any real good drift, but again, the Dry Bomber had the best of something, its drifting abilities getting 5 out of ten points. Luigi drifted through the turn without skidding, which could be because his car also had maxxed out traction. Daisy matched his drift throughout the whole turn, although she skidded a bit because the Egg 1's traction was marginally less than Dry Bomber. Mario and Peach ended up on the very edge of the turn when they drifted through it because of the atrocious drift in the Cucumber and Poltergust.
After that turn, the next one followed immediatedly. Luigi got though with no problem as usual, while Daisy had a tough time making the transition due to the low 4 drift points in the Egg 1. Peach's car had the highest speed, so after the first turn she was able to catch up a bit on the short straight away that connected the two turns. Mario's accel was slightly better than Peach's so he was able to shoot out right next to Peach. A curved straight away connected the last turn with the next one. The Egg 1 had better speed than the Dry Bomber. "See ya at the finish line, boyfriend!" Daisy yelled at Luigi as she passed him. Peach was able to follow suit when she and Mario were on the straight away. Peach easily blazed past Mario with her 7.5 points of speed, compared to Mario's 5. "When I win, we can't have sex for two months." Peach reminded Mario. "I'll a-say the same thing when I win, boob!" Mario yelled. He aligned himself behind Peach for a few seconds, eventually pulling ahead of Peach.
"How did you do that?" she asked. "It's called slipstream." Mario yelled as he finally caught up with Luigi. "Go team Mario!" they both cried over the noise of the engines as they put two V's together completely ripping off the Venture Bros. Daisy was still in the lead, having already started into the straight away turn. "I have an idea." Luigi told Mario. "What?" "Let's drift through the turn." Luigi suggested."Great idea. It'll catch Daisy off guard." Luigi and Mario drifted through the whole mile and a half turn. Daisy just drove through the turn like it was a straight away, giving Mario and Luigi a small transition to make between getting to top speed once the turn was over. "See you next time...fucker." Mario and Luigi said simultaneously as they completely went past Daisy with a cloud of smoke forming behind the two brothers. Peach saw this, and also drifted through the turn, catching up to Mario, who was behind Luigi. Using her speed to her advantage, she was beside Mario again and tried to shove him into the grass. "Hah, good luck. My kart weight and my fat ass combined is heavier than your light frame and small kart." Mario said as he easily rammed Peach off the course. "See you next time!" Mario said as he rejoined his status of being behind Luigi.
"Don't worry, I'll get revenge for you." Daisy said to Peach as she utilized her now-superior speed to pass up Mario(that happens a lot to him, doesn't it?), then becoming side by side with Luigi. Daisy started early into the lollipop by drifting early, getting a longer drift in hopes in blinding Luigi with smoke. He must've realized this because he also started drifting early right after she did. Unfortunately, Luigi accidentally blinded Mario for a second, nearly causing him to miss the turn. "Nice trick, bitch. But don't count on it happening again." Luigi thought to himself. After the three finished the lollipop turn, Peach was far behind just now drifting into it. "Hmm...I wonder." she said. Taking a page from Mario Kart, Peach twisted the steering wheel back and forth twice in hopes of seeing sparks on the back tires. And to the Mario brothers' dismay, it worked. When she was at the end of turn, Peach stopped drifting and shot out ahead from the effects of a mini turbo, making a three-way tie between her, Mario, and Luigi for second place with Daisy still in first starting into the 5 turn challenge.
"I thought I a-rammed you off-a the course." Mario said as he saw Peach about to pass him. "You're not the only one with tricks for getting speed boosts." Peach answered with a wink as she took second place.
"Well, I guess I'll just have to wait for someone to finish, what with it being past twelve minutes already and everything." Tails said as he was looking down at the timer that was displayed on his video camera screen.
OK, this is taking way too ling, so I'll just skip to the Y-turn. Luigi's in first, Peach got rammed off the track AGAIN but sped up afterwards into second, Mario's car blew up and Daisy is trying to get Peach out of the race for reasons I can't think up but I'll put it in anyway.
Not knowing the difference between happy and deceit, Luigi followed the sign that said to go through the long part of the Y, eventually leading to a warp that was placed there for imbeciles who would follow a sign with a devilish smile on it. Uinable to turn around now, Luigi went full throtle into the warp, hoping he wouldn't be sent back to the start. At the same time, Peach and Daisy were constantly ramming each other after taking the right path in the Y turn. So whatever happened to Luigi? Well...
Turns out the warp actually put him right after the spring turn. Peach and Daisy were too busy trying to outdo each other on the actual spring turnto notice. So as you can predict, Luigi won the race and the dare was over.
Back at the set
"That was some spectacular racing, wasn't it folks? Drifting, explosions...this could've nearly explained the complete plot of The Fast and The Furious Tokyo Drift." Tai said as he took the stage again(when did he get back?). "And now for our next segment: Suck or f..." he tried to say as he received a messsage through the headset microphone.
"Yo, T-Fox, stop the show. We've been found out by the school security system. We can't bypass it." Shadow told him.
"Uh, due to technical diffulties, we'll have to stop early. So see ya next week for more of those hi-larious dares!' Tai said as walked of stage.
Behind the set, Sonic was doing a head count to make sure that all cast members were here in case he ran out of excuses when they got busted. "K, let's see...Cream, Rya, Amy, Rouge, Tai, me, Shear, Tails...Oh no! Shadow and Silver are missing! That's two less excuses we don't have!"
"Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, calm down. You told them to keep watch in case we got caught, like right now." Rya assured him.
"Oh, uh, yeah, that's right. Whoa, am I tweaking. OK, that's still leaves..." Sonic was about to say until moaning noises started coming from the set. The noises grew eventually louder, and louder, and louder still. Then, the sound of glass breaking caused everyone to rush out onto the set. Cream and Tails ran backstage after seing what had happened.
"YO WHAT THE?" Tai yelled out loud.
To their horror, and I mean REAL HORROR. I mean we're talking like enjoying Dora the Explrer horror. Knuckles was humping the first video camera like it was the last thing he'd ever do. As a matter of fact, he was humping the camera so hard, that it seemed like it had a "vagina" so to speak. After two minutes of straight metalic sex, Knuckles turned around to see his fellow cast members staring at him.
"Whaaat? You said to 'work' the camera..." Knux said in a little 5-year old voice.
"I didn't mean with your manhood, dickhead...gosh. You're gonna get laid in the next chapter anyway after being stoned, so why go through all this?" Sonic enunciated.
"You been looking at the script again?" Rya asked.
"Duh. Doesn't everybnody?" he replied.
"Not in the next chapter we won't...well, for you guys at least." Silver said out of nowhere as he walked up to them.
"Where'd you come from?" Jelea inquired(I feel smarter).
"Stop asking questions or this chapter will never be finished!"
Dun, dun dun dun dun, etc. etc.
Will the show actually go on next week? Why are people doing what Sonic says for once, and how did Tai get back in about 15 minutes? These questions can only be answered in the next chapter of...A Typical Day in High School! (cue Dragon Ball Z music)
I know, I know, there's absolutely no excuse as to why it's been three months since the last update. And the simple answer is: school. There was a sequence of projects that kept me tied up for most of the three months. The rest was just typing it. i promise you won't have to wait as long for ch 7. So until next time... and also, expect random craziness courtesy of reading WST by da sly
R&R
p.s: any complaints of waiting this long are welcome.