Author's Note: Holas! I'm so happy to have such wonderful readers, thank you for reading the previous chapter! I hope that everyone will continue reading this story to its great big finish :) Anyway, as for some of the questions that were asked...well, it takes me a week to write out a chapter. I'm so slow, I know. I'm a total perfectionist, so first I read what I planned out for the chapter, think of how I should plan it out, write out a draft, make changes, read it over, make some more changes, add in ideas, and then, finally, I proofread it. Then, I upload the document, and edit it so it's "read-able". So please be patient with these chapters! Anyway, about this chapter...I felt I could've done better, but I'm pretty proud of my work for this one...so enjoy! :)
Disclaimer: Bleach belongs to Tite Kubo.
Hey there! This is your fellow idiot, Rukia Kuchiki. Some people believe that I am a legend, others believe that I'm the spokesperson for the academically challenged. Well, as for me...I like to believe that I am the Queen of Video Games...the biggest fan of Chappy the Bunny...and the world's most ingenious idiot ever born.
Rukia Kuchiki was staring in a bored manner at her social studies teacher, Ishiyama-sensei, as he explained to the class about their latest group project, "Alright, kids. I believe now is an appropriate time to assign a project." The punks, delinquents, and potheads in the class all groaned and complained to each other about the project while the nerds perked up their ears to carefully listen to the details of the project.
That's Ishiyama-sensei. Believe it or not, this guy's a lot meaner than he looks...to him, education is the core, the primary factor for success in life. To him, without it, you're dead. ...Well, I have no grades yet look. I actually HAVE A LIFE.
"Now, as you know, we've been studying Ancient Greece for quite awhile now. I think an appropriate way to end the topic is by having a group project, along with an exam three weeks from now, since you need time to finish the project. This project is a research project on a poster board on Greek gods and goddesses." Ishiyama-sensei explained. The nerds scanned the classroom, their radars attempting to find the most suitable people needed for the project's success.
And he doesn't take late homeworks, either. Make-up tests, sure, late homework? Nooo. No matter what reason. Hell, the guy wouldn't even choke up if you told him your grandmother died on the day he assigned you that homework. Jerk much?
"And don't bother trying to get into a group with your friends. I've already assigned your groups." Ishiyama-sensei said casually as he pulled out a sheet of paper with all the group assignments.
In MY opinion, the guy's wasting his life on teaching things of the past. It's been done, who cares? We're all bound to make the exact same fricking mistakes, anyway.
Upon hearing that the groups had already been assigned, a nerdy girl screamed out, "No! No, no, no! I don't want that! I don't want to fail...!" She then buried her head in her arms and began to sob loudly as while nerds gave her looks of sympathy and understanding, the others gave her not as kind looks.
Oh, right. That's the nerd girl. She usually throws a fit about everything that puts her grades at risk. It's ridiculous, really. She obviously wanted to be grouped with all the nerds. Too bad her fellow space cadets aren't gonna be with her. Ha ha.
Ishiyama-sensei, who was used to the nerd girl's constant fits, ignored this, saying in a rather uncaring manner, "...You'll be fine. Okay, anyway. I'm going to read aloud the groups now. Group One, Miz--"
Oh, who cares. I'll care...when he calls my name. So anyway, you know the study group I'm in? Just the most awesome group ever--The Idiocracy. We get along a little better now, I think. We're slowly starting to accept each other as actual friends, and you know what? I think it's really nice that we're finally starting to be able to work with each other, cooperate, and--
"--and the last group is Rukia Kuchiki, Shuuhei Hisagi, Rangiku Matsumoto, Yumichika Ayasegawa, Tatsuki Arisawa, and Renji Abarai." Ishiyama-sensei read aloud.
WHAT?!
Rukia then suddenly slammed her fists on her desk and screeched, "No! No, no, no! I don't want that! I don't want to fail!!" She then dropped her head on her desk, buried her face in her arms, and began to cry. The entire class, including Ishiyama-sensei, stared at her, stunned. Shuuhei, who looked pissed and annoyed with her reaction, shot a spitball at Rukia's head.
I take back what I said, nerd girl. I take it back.
"...Hmm, so we have Zeus." Rangiku said, reading the flashcard that read "Zeus, the Supreme God".
Shuuhei looked glum about their choice, and grumbled, "Damn, it's not fair, I wanted Aphrodite, she was the babe..." He then stood up angrily and snapped, "See, this is why you should've let ME pick out from the bag!"
"Whatever, Shuuhei, the Greek dude we got is just like you, anyway. Always going after one woman after another...and causing her problems." Rukia said, rolling her eyes.
"My gawd, Rukia's, like, right. I heard what you did to Kanisawa." Rangiku said, applying on lip gloss.
Shuuhei said, "Well, in my defense, she was sorta too short to kiss me, anyway."
"...You're horrible." Tatsuki, Yumichika, Rukia, and Rangiku all said after a pause.
Shuuhei raised his eyebrows and said, "...Oh my. I got such a bad reception." He then turned to Renji, who was looking through the textbook, and shot him a sparkling look, and said in a overly cheerful manner, "But I know that you, Renji darling, will be on my side even if the entire world turns on me!"
Renji gave Shuuhei no response.
"Okay, okay. Look, let's get started on this. We need to divide this into three groups to divide up the work. We need the researchers, the artists, and the set-up people." Rukia said, taking charge as she stood up.
"Ooh! I wanna draw. And color. And make things pretty." Rangiku volunteered happily.
"As do I!" Yumichika agreed, nodding, in a cheerful manner.
"Yeah, you guys would probably do a good job on that. Now. I wanna be one of the set-up people. If you're with me, you have to come with me to get all the materials and stuff. We already have the poster board, but we need to get glue, scissors, construction paper, and other project crap. We also will have to decide the layout. So. Who's coming with me??" Rukia said boldly.
No one raised their hands. Rukia scowled and snapped, "Oh, you sons of a bitches!"
"...This sucks! I wanted to be with Renji on the computer...!" Shuuhei whined.
"I know this sucks, I mean, I had to be stuck with you, of all the people." Rukia said nonchalantly as she walked down the aisle of the school goods store and put in construction paper and scissors into her basket.
Thankfully, I wouldn't have to be with him for long...we just needed to find the glue and be done with it. And I had one glue on mind--the brand new Chappy the Bunny pink-colored gluestick.
Shuuhei sighed in a frustrated and annoyed manner, but what he saw caught his eye, and made him gasp. "Hey! Hey! Hey, Rukia!" He repeatedly tapped Rukia.
"What!" Rukia snapped, slapping his hand away.
Shuuhei gave her a look, and nostrils flaring, "Don't you dare talk to me like that, young lady!"
Rukia gave Shuuhei a "Double-U-Tee-Eff" look, and Shuuhei ignored her as he said, "Let's get...that one." He pointed at a gluestick that was blue in color, and the character that was depicted on the glue made Rukia gasp in horror.
"We can't get that one...!" Rukia managed to sputter, still horrified at the gluestick Shuuhei had wanted to buy.
That's right...it was the longtime character rival to Chappy the Bunny...the character depicted on the glue was none other than Duckie the Duck.
Back in the library, Tatsuki and Yumichika were thinking of ways to design the title of the poster board, and were deciding on what color to color in the title.
"...It'll look much better if it was in red." Tatsuki stated matter-of-factly, readying her red marker on the top of the poster board.
"Non! Non! It is clearly meant to be painted over in a beautiful, bright pink." Yumichika said, eyeing Tatsuki as he pointed his pink marker on the poster board headline.
Tatsuki glared at him, and Yumichika glared at Tatsuki.
"...Red." Tatsuki said, eyes narrowing.
"...A rosy pink." Yumichika shook his head, glaring at Tatsuki.
Trouble's brewing...
Renji and Rangiku were in the computer lab on the second floor of the school, both on computers across from each other. "So, uhh...find anything yet?" Rangiku asked, turning around on her chair to look at Renji's screen.
Renji said quickly, "Oh, yeah, sure, uh huh, yeah." He had "Zeus" on Wikipedia on his computer screen.
"Cool!" Rangiku said cheerfully, not noticing the haste in Renji's voice, and turned back to her computer screen, which had a research page on Zeus.
Minutes later, Rangiku turned around slowly to see Renji staring at something on his computer screen--and it sure as hell wasn't Zeus. "What the hell are you doing, looking at porn?!" Rangiku screamed, making Renji jumping up about a mile high.
"What!" Renji yelled rather loudly in an aloof manner as he closed the porn website with a flushed face.
Rangiku glowered at him, "I said...what do you think you're doing, watching porn...??"
"Well...! I...! You...!" Renji stuttered, and quickly moved his head to look at Rangiku's screen, which was an...online clothing store. Renji immediately pointed at it and yelled angrily, "Hey! Hypocrite!"
Rangiku, shocked, turned to see that she had her website still up, and laughed nervously as she exclaimed, "Ooh!!"
Back to Shuuhei and Rukia...
"What's wrong? Why can't we get Duckie??" Shuuhei asked, grabbing the blue gluestick.
"Because!" Rukia protested, grabbing the pink gluestick with Chappy the Bunny on it, and continued, "I want to buy Chappy!"
"What! Eww! You're a Chappy fan?! Now I hate you even more, you rabbit-loving midget!" Shuuhei snarled.
"Same here, you dick-less dickhead!" Rukia snapped.
Pause.
Wow! That was a really weird sentence...!
Shuuhei snapped, "...Well, anyway, we're not buying Chappy!"
"And why not?! It's my money!" Rukia snapped.
Shuuhei snarled, "Because! Chappy's just like Yumichika--a guy with no balls! I mean, he lets himself be displayed on PINK-colored shit!"
"So what?! He's a lot cuter than your stupid duck!" Rukia snapped.
Shuuhei snapped, "Listen, you! You always get what YOU want, so this time, I'm gonna get what I want!"
Rukia, in disbelief, yelled, "Just WHAT are you talking about?! The only reason why you never get things your way is because you're just an idiot!"
"So are you! WE are on the SAME STATUS!" Shuuhei roared in defiance.
Obviously, this moron didn't know the difference between academically challenged...and mentally challenged.
Rukia snapped, "Shut up! I'm different from YOU!"
"Ya sure are! I mean, how can you not like Duckie but like Chappy?!" Shuuhei snapped.
The store clerk sighed, "Hey, kid, just buy your girlfriend what she wants, will you? What a terrible gentleman."
"She's NOT my girlfriend!" Shuuhei snapped at the store clerk.
"Yeah! What makes you think that we're together?! I'd rather go shoot myself!" Rukia snapped.
"...Whoa. That's a bit OD, don't you think?" Shuuhei said, looking at Rukia.
"...Yeah, you're right. Still. It's you." Rukia said, shrugging, earning her a glare from Shuuhei.
"You're not together?" the store clerk asked, puzzled.
"Of course not!" Both Shuuhei and Rukia yelled in frustration. Didn't this store clerk realize that they had a heated debate about two overly popular characters, and could not be interrupted?!
"Really? You two look like you know each other pretty well, and you have similar fashion styles, so, I was, eh, you know." the store clerk said, and turned away, fanning himself, looking uninterested.
Shuuhei and Rukia looked at each other, and said, "You and I have similar fashion styles?" They looked bewildered at this comment.
Did I? I mean, sure I was SORT OF into the whole punk goth thing, but...Shuuhei seemed way more into it than I was. I just owned a few accessories and clothes, but...not much, really.
"Haha! What an adorable little couple! I'll give you those gluesticks for free just 'cause you two are so cute together!" the store clerk laughed under his green-and-white striped hat, fanning himself as he grinned at them.
Shuuhei walked over to the store clerk and glared at him and said in a dangerous voice, "Listen, dick. You've got some balls, talking to me like that."
"Oh, my! We're so scary, aren't we? But I'm afraid you've got my name wrong! My name is Kisuke Urahara..." the store clerk said, still smiling despite being locked on by Shuuhei's death glare.
And while Shuuhei's just looking like a total moron, I'm just standing there, wondering what the hell I should do. Drop the money off on the counter and make a run for it with my glue stick...or stay and try to make it so the poor store clerk doesn't end up breathing through an IV and that Shuuhei doesn't end up in juvy?
Rukia, waiting for Shuuhei to finish his little squabbling with Urahara, walked on over to the CD shelf, and began to examine the CDs. Just then, one CD caught her eye, and it made Rukia go, "No way! I've been looking for this CD everywhere!" Both Urahara and Shuuhei stopped their verbal match and looked at Rukia.
I couldn't believe it! It was just my most favorite J-rock band ever--Antic Cafe's new CD, Gokutama Rock Cafe! When I first heard it came out, I couldn't buy it 'cause I was broke, but when I finally got the money to buy it...it was sold out! I can't believe this weird store clerk still had this CD in stock! Well, technically, not much...there was only like, one left...
(Author's Note: Ahem! For those who don't know, Antic Cafe is an actual J-rock band, no, I do not own them, but they are my most favorite J-rock band EVER...they were the band that got me into J-rock, and I love 'em! Nyappy! :D )
Shuuhei went over to see the CD in Rukia's hands, and his eyes widened at the sight of it. "No way! Yo, creepy store guy! I didn't know you sold Antic Cafe CDs!" Shuuhei exclaimed.
"Yes, well, I happen to have...connections." Urahara said mysteriously, while thinking in a somewhat annoyed manner, ' "Creepy store guy"...??'
"What?! You're a fan of Antic Cafe?! No way!" Rukia exclaimed, looking at Shuuhei in surprise.
"Are you kidding me? They're awesome!" Shuuhei said in an ecstatic manner.
"Oh, that's so cool! I haven't met anyone who's been such a big fan of Antic Cafe before! I mean, sure, people know them, and they say they're alright, but, wow!" Rukia exclaimed.
"Heh! Of course I'm a huge fan! I was smart...and pre-ordered that CD and got it on the day it came out!" Shuuhei said, looking proud of himself.
"For real?! Lucky!" Rukia said.
"Hey, hey, did you ever go to Harajuku dressed up as one of them??" Shuuhei asked.
"Hell yeah! I went dressed as Kanon!" Rukia replied excitedly.
"Yeah? Cool, I went dressed as Miku! But I had to color my hair and everything." Shuuhei said.
"Well! Now you two look more like a couple! Isn't this sweet??" Urahara laughed, fanning himself.
Dammit! The evil bastard just HAD to ruin it. And I was about to get into the good part about my favorite band!
"This doesn't mean anything!" Rukia and Shuuhei both yelled angrily.
"Hey! Store man! I want this CD!" Rukia stated, holding up the CD.
I know, I know. I can just download it online someplace, but buying the CD is like supporting the artist, which I want to do, so, yeah! Fuck me!
(Author's Note: Sheesh, and the CD is expensive, too...fifty bucks :P That really hacked off my money supply.)
"Hmm...and you're not buying the glue stick instead?" Urahara asked.
Rukia then realized that she had only money to buy the glue stick. "Are you kidding me?! I finally find this CD in stock, and now I can't buy it?!" Rukia screeched, startling both Shuuhei and Urahara.
Urahara laughed nervously, "Well, uhh...ahh, how about this? If you and your boyfriend come in three times a week for let's say, two months, you can have that CD and both those glue sticks for free!"
"We'll do it!" Rukia stated immediately, forgetting two things: one, saying that Shuuhei wasn't her boyfriend, and two, Shuuhei's opinion.
"What!" Shuuhei snapped, looking at Rukia in disbelief.
"Hey, you're obviously not gonna get a job when you grow up, so this is an opportunity!" Rukia countered defiantly, earning her a smack in the head by a pissed off Shuuhei.
What a bastard. Oh, well...you know what, though? I think he's not such a bad guy. Maybe I just didn't know him as well as I thought I did. ...That doesn't mean I like him, though...!!
"Come on, red will obviously look so much better!" Tatsuki snapped.
"Absolutely not! A light pink adds so much character and elegance!" Yumichika snapped, scowling.
"Whatever! Zeus is a GUY, not a GIRL, alright?! So we're using red!" Tatsuki snarled.
"Non, non, and NON! Pink...a blushing, beautiful, and innocent pink will surely--" Yumichika began.
"Yeah, yeah, I don't care! Red! We're using red, and that's final!" Tatsuki snapped, and was about to touch the posterboard with the tip of her red marker when Yumichika screamed, "Noooooo...!!" and pushed Tatsuki so hard, the two stumbled into a book shelf.
"WHAT IS GOING ON?!" Fukumura the Librarian screeched as she stormed over to the two Idiocracy members, her fat jiggling as she moved. The Smarticans, who were nearby, looked over at the amusing scene that would occur. Ichigo tried to stifle his laughter as Momo nudged him hard as if to say, "Don't be so mean...!" Ichigo just shrugged.
"Alright, you two! You've only been causing unnecessary noise for the past several minutes, and it's disturbing everyone else! I thought with just two of you from your ridiculous study group, it would be perfectly fine, but you're just as loud and noisy! How do your parents handle you kids?! Keep it down, or I'll call Ishiyama-sensei!!" Fukumura then stormed away.
Tatsuki and Yumichika both rolled their eyes at Fukumura's annoying words, but "parents" seemed to hit a hard note. They both grew rather quiet afterwards. Tatsuki then said in a rather depressed manner to Yumichika, "...Hey, you, you can use pink if you want."
"...No, no, no...I was being very foolish. You may use red, after all, red is just as noble and striking as pink is..." Yumichika said, waving his manicured and delicate-looking hand at Tatsuki, and sounded just as depressed as Tatsuki.
"...What are you so depressed for?" Tatsuki said, giving Yumichika a look.
"Well, I...no, no! It's simply to disgraceful to talk about. Non, non...it's simply too shameful." Yumichika said, shaking his head.
"Huh. Whatever, then." Tatsuki said simply, looking away.
After a pause, Yumichika burst into dramatic tears and grabbed onto Tatsuki, wailing, "No, you fool! You are supposed to pressure me into telling you what's causing me so much misery, not simply IGNORE it!"
Tatsuki, freaked out, snapped, "Lemme go!" She attempted to break away from Yumichika's grip, but failed to do so. Apparently, the guy was more muscle than she thought. "What! What! Fine, I'll listen! Just let me go!" Tatsuki snapped.
Yumichika then let go and sighed dramatically, "...Well, if you REALLY want to know..."
"I never said I wanted to know..." Tatsuki muttered.
However, Yumichika ignored this and said, "In truth, while I live such a glamorous and luxurious life...my parents are divorced, and I lived with my mother."
"Yeah? Why'd they break up?" Tatsuki asked.
"Oh! My father was with another man, and...things happened. You see, my father was a very attractive man to men!" Yumichika explained casually.
Pause.
"...Like father, like son." Tatsuki muttered in a deadpan tone, looking away with a "Oh-Now-I-Understand-Everything" look.
"Anyhow, after that incident, my mother showed extreme dislike for my antics and appearance. She is very terrible to me! She wishes I would be much more 'manly', and everyone seems to poke fun at me for it, when all I am doing is simply being me...!" Yumichika sniffed, taking out a hanky to dab his teary eyes.
"Yeah...? Same here." Tatsuki said.
"Eh? Is that so? But you're not very femin--" Yumichika began.
"The opposite, dammit!" Tatsuki snapped.
"Ohhh." Yumichika nodded, and gestured for her to continue.
"I don't know. I guess I'm just a natural-born, ultimate tomboy. But remember how I told you that my mom is really uptight and ladylike and everything? Well, she obviously hates how her only daughter acts like...you know, a man. She's always trying to change me, even though I don't. I'm like you, see? I'm just trying to be who I am, and there she goes, thinking I'm a guy. I mean, I'm a girl, too, I just don't dress or show it like most girls would...so, yeah, Yumichika, I guess I understand what you're going through." Tatsuki sighed.
She then looked over to see Yumichika's reaction, as he was silent, and saw that he was crying, as he dramatically sobbed, "Oh, Tatsuki...! I used to believe that you were a mere, ugly fool, but now that I see you and I share mutual feelings, we are much more alike than I believed!"
He then gave a tearful smile as he held out his arms for a hug and exclaimed joyously, "Come, let us embrace at the wake of our new bond...!"
"Don't push it!!" Tatsuki snapped, seriously freaked.
Meanwhile, while Tatsuki and Yumichika finally managed to get in touch with the other's true feelings about their "tomboy" and "girly man" stereotypes, Rangiku and Renji in the computer room...
"...Yeah! Yeah! I liked this one!" Renji exclaimed, pointing at a game on the Barbie website.
"Ooh! Club Beauty?! Me too! I love the whole makeover thing!" Rangiku squealed, clicking it "Play Now" on the website.
"Oh, hey, wanna use my username or...?" Renji asked when the sign in page popped up.
"...Yours." Rangiku said after a minute, trying not to laugh.
"...You better not laugh." Renji growled as he typed in "AznBarbieGrl6".
"Whoa...!! No way!" Rangiku exclaimed, instead of laughing.
"Huh?" Renji asked.
"YOU'RE AznBarbieGrl6?! I'm AznBarbieGrl7!!" Rangiku exclaimed.
"For real?! Way awesome!" Renji exclaimed, slapping a high five with Rangiku.
"Man, I always thought you were this total loser delinquent who always hung out with Shuuhei, but you're totally awesome!" Rangiku blabbed.
"Ha, you kidding me? Since my mom's always making sure I do girly stuff, I always had to have these kind of websites on my computer screen!" Renji laughed.
"Well, technically, since I'm, like, popular, I shouldn't be playing these, like, childish games and stuff, but it's just so much fun!" Rangiku squealed.
"Exactly!" Renji agreed.
"You know, about you being made fun of with the whole gender thing...I understand." Rangiku said suddenly.
"What? Don't tell me your mom thinks you're a guy or something like that..." Renji said.
"No!" Rangiku snapped, rolling her eyes.
"Oh." Renji said, calming down a bit.
"Well, you know, it's just this thing with my hair. I actually have white hair!" Rangiku explained.
"What!" Renji blurted.
"It's true! I'm affected by albinism, so my natural hair color is white, and my skin should be totally white, too, but daddy fixed all that, you know? He made it so that my skin looks normal, and that my hair is nice, healthy, normal color." Rangiku explained.
"Whoa, never knew you had that going on." Renji said.
"Yeah. And when I was in like, boarding school, those mean bitches made fun of me for it! So I left!" Rangiku said.
Renji then patted Rangiku's shoulder, "Must've been tough, huh?"
"Yeah...but, you know. I'm cool. I'm popular now." Rangiku said, shrugging.
Pause.
"...Yeah, so I'm gonna go head on to the bathroom now. I'll be right back." Rangiku said.
"Huh? Yeah, go ahead." Renji said, turning back to the computer.
Rangiku headed off for the bathroom, and Renji continued to play the games on the Barbie website. After awhile, he then heard footsteps behind him stop, and he turned around, saying, "Hey, you should check out this page decorator--"
Renji stopped dead in his tracks when he saw Tatsuki, Yumichika, Rukia, and Shuuhei staring at him, stunned. Renji, shocked, looked at the computer screen, and then back at his fellow Idiocracy members.
He then quickly closed the website and said, "I can explain..."
But sadly, Shuuhei's maniacal laugh blocked out his words, as this caused everyone else to laugh as well, when Rangiku entered. "Rangiku! Explain to them! Come on!" Renji looked at Rangiku.
Rangiku stuttered, "Uhh..." The other Idiocracy members looked at her. She then tossed her strawberry blonde hair, and said, "No way, Renji! You were on a girly site like THAT?"
Renji glared at Rangiku, and snarled, "Okay, fine! I see how this is going! Rangiku is an albino! She actually has white hair!"
"HEY!" Rangiku shrieked angrily at him, and quickly covered her mouth as she realized her dumb response to Renji. All the Idiocracy members stared at Rangiku, stunned.
"Oh my gawd. I've been picturing myself with a white-haired GRANDMA!!" Shuuhei screamed, fainting.
Rangiku glared at Renji, who looked away innocently, and Rangiku snapped, "Whatever! I'm, like, popular, and Renji's just this loser whose mom thinks he's a girl!"
...Ahh, yes. Fun times, fun times...anyway, we managed to get the project finished on time, in case you're wondering. Ironically, while Yumichika, Tatsuki, Shuuhei, and I fought, we managed to get out part done, while the more friendly Renji and Rangiku didn't get their part finished. So we all pitched in and helped out. And you know what? We didn't fail. In fact, we got a pretty damn good grade. I think...there's still a lot about each member of this group, there's so much more. And for some reason, I can't wait to get to know more about everyone. And I think...everyone feels that way, too. I'm glad.
Author's Note: Alright...hope that satisfies you all 'til next week. I was supposed to finish the rest tomorrow and publish it then, but since I have no time to publish it early tomorrow (and I know you all want it out as soon as possible XD), I decided to finish it all up today...and publish it today! Yay! But anyway, til next week, everyone...SEEYAS :)