Chapter 6: Their lives…without her

The journey back to the Konoha was terrible; Naruto and Sasuke hadn't said a word to each other on their 2 day walk back. Sasuke carried Sakura's body home. He refused to leave it there; at the place she died so painfully. He wanted her in her home town where friends and family could remember her.

1 hour later

Lady Tsunade summoned Naruto and Sasuke to her office.

"Naruto, Sasuke where's Sakura; what's your status, was the mission successful?" She raised an eyebrow at them. The two of them just looked at the floor, too despondent to answer.

"Well?" she asked as she grew impatient.

"The mission was a success, but the cost was too high…Sakura's dead." Naruto bluntly stated

"What do you mean she's dead, you two were supposed to protect her!" she yelled as she slammed her hands on her desk and stood up. She was furious that her student hadn't returned from the mission.

"You think we didn't try; it wasn't in our control! At least, it wasn't in mine." Sasuke shot back as he glared at Naruto. Lady Tsunade looked from Sasuke to Naruto.

"What is he talking about?" she asked. Naruto took a while to answer

"Sakura made an antidote for the poison and gave it to me. She told me only to use it if I or Sasuke got poisoned. She made me promise her not to use it if she got hurt, but when I saw her in so much pain I tried to give her the antidote but she told me not to." Naruto explained as he began to cry. The guilt of not helping his best friend brought up all his emotions. He couldn't take it anymore; before Lady Tsunade could say another word Naruto ran out the door. Sasuke watched him leave before he left.

The weather suited the overall mood of Naruto and Sasuke. The afternoon brought in storm clouds and heavy rain. Naruto watched the rain beat down on his window as he thought about Sakura; he would never see her again. He would never hear her laugh again or see her warm smile. He held his picture of the three of them and just stared at Sakura. He thought about the day Lady Tsunade gave them their mission to the land of tea. They were scheduled to leave in an hours' time; Naruto went to Sakura's house after he finished his packing for the mission.

"Here Naruto, I want you to keep this safe."

"Okay, what is it?" He asked her

"It's an antidote that can neutralise all kinds of poison."

"Why do you want me to keep it? I'm not the best person to hold important things."

"If I keep it I'll be tempted to use it; and if Sasuke keeps it his first instinct will be to use it on me if I get poisoned."

"Of course he would, he cares about you. We both do; and besides what makes you think I wouldn't do the same thing." He looked at her with a confused expression

"Because I want you to promise me that you won't use it on me." She answered him very seriously

"What are you talking about, Sakura. If I don't use it on you and you get poisoned, you'll die."

"Exactly. I'm going to give up my life for Sasuke." Naruto couldn't take it seriously, why would Sakura even consider such a thing.

"What! Why, Sakura are you crazy!" He raised his voice

"You wouldn't understand Naruto! I already lost Sasuke once, I would rather give up my life than lose him again!" she yelled with a trembling voice. Naruto walked to Sakura and put his hands on her shoulders as he tried to talk her out of her crazy idea.

"Sasuke isn't going to get poisoned. He's really strong; he can more than take care of himself."

"I know he's strong but this ninja was the best from his clan and now he's gone rogue." She began to cry and buried her face in Naruto's chest.

"Zabuza was a rogue ninja too and look how that turned out." He said as he stroked her hair

"Exactly, look how that turned out; we all thought Sasuke died when he threw himself in front of you to protect you from Haku's senbone" She looked up at him with her tear stained face and a pained expression on her face. She had really thought her idea through. Naruto looked into her teary jade eyes and saw pain and sorrow. Just by her eyes Naruto could tell that Sakura had really suffered without Sasuke; that everyday had been difficult for her. He wished he could have been there for her more.

"But Sakura…" he silently spoke as he began to cry as he knew he had to do it for her.

"Naruto please, I'm begging you…promise me you won't use it on me, please." She begged as she put her hands on Naruto's face and brought his forehead against hers and spoke with her eyes closed.

"I have to do this." She whispered. Naruto didn't answer her he just pulled her into a tight hug and continued to cry as he promised her. Sakura placed her arms around his neck and hugged him back. The two of them stood in silence as they were embraced in each other's arms for they knew it would be their last time. Before she pulled away she pecked Naruto on the lips.

Naruto put his fingers on his lips where Sakura kissed him. That was the last time he had spent time with her before their mission began. A knock on his door snapped him out of his thoughts. When he went see who it was; he opened the door to see a sad Hinata. He stood aside and let her walk in; he closed the door behind her. Naruto and Hinata stared at each other in a deafening silence for a long time; both had tears in their eyes. After an eternity of silent stares Naruto pulled Hinata into tight hug as tears continued to pour from his eyes. Naruto needed a shoulder to cry on; he was glad Hinata came when she did. Hinata knew Naruto needed someone and tightened her embrace on Naruto. She looked up at him and saw his light blue eyes filled with regret. They looked into each other's eyes until they leaned in; eventually their lips met in a long and gentle kiss. After they separated Naruto sighed and smiled at Hinata with his hands intertwined with hers before he spoke. "Thanks Hinata." She smiled at him and put her arms back around him as she hugged him again.

2 weeks later

Sasuke took a walk around the village and continuously thought about Sakura. His head was filled with all the memories he had with her. The memory he thought about the most was when they were on the mission; just after Sakura woke up when she fainted.

"I thought I was supposed to the one resting and recovering." She spoke with her eyes closed.

"You are; but nobody said that I couldn't, especially when I have you in my lap." He replied before he kissed her on the cheek and held her in a tight hug. That was the last time he had a private moment with her. Naruto found Sasuke next to the bench by the academy. Sasuke was not happy to see Naruto in the slightest.

"Go away." He flatly stated. Naruto stood in place and looked at Sasuke.

"You obviously don't feel any remorse for what you did-"

"Do you honestly think that I don't feel remorse? I've never felt this guilty in my entire life. I didn't just lose a teammate. I lost a best friend and a sister." Naruto replied.

"What do you want?" he asked and got tired of their conversation. He didn't want to talk about their loss of Sakura anymore.

"This is a letter from Sakura to you." Naruto knew he had Sasuke's attention as soon as he mentioned the letter. Sasuke turned around and looked at the letter in Naruto's hand before he took it. Naruto left when he saw Sasuke read the letter.

Days later Sasuke went out for another walk. His walk took him to the memorial stone; as he stared at it he went down the list of names until he found the one he was looking for. The most recent one of them all.

-Haruno Sakura-

He looked at her name for a long time. He never thought he would see a member of his team on the K.I.A memorial stone. He wished he could see her one last time.

Dear Sasuke

If you're reading this letter it means that I gave my life up for you. Please don't be mad at Naruto; I made him promise not to use the antidote on me. Also, don't be sad or upset that I did this because I would do it again in second. I guess I still never got over my feelings for you. The only thing I regret is not having you back sooner and not spending enough time with you. I'm really going to miss having you next to me; your warmth comforting me and your arms protecting me. Sasuke when you came back to the village; I didn't know how to feel; I had gotten so used to not having you around and depending on Naruto. The biggest problem was that the desire for you was there but the need wasn't; so I pursued you but not wholeheartedly. I admit that I went after you because I had wanted you for so many years and when you came back I made myself believe that I needed you because you wanted me. I do still love you though. I just didn't want to lose you again especially when you confessed to me. I did that because I was selfish and I'm sorry. But I believe that you never really loved me; I think you had a situation of not wanting to lose me again; but I don't think the love was ever really there. With you Sasuke blinded by revenge and hatred; you never got a chance to actually live; you always seemed to just survive. You didn't live your life to the fullest for the people you cared about; you survived for yourself to achieve your goal. But now things have changed. I pray that through my death you can finally live.

Goodbye Sasuke; no matter what happens I have always loved you and I always will love you.

Forever yours Sakura

Sasuke read the letter for the third time since he had arrived at the memorial stone. Sasuke noticed that someone was behind him.

"Why Naruto, why would she do this for me?"

"Because Sasuke; even after everything you put her through she still loved you. She talked about you everyday. And the thing is; she wasn't like you; when her trust was betrayed she didn't give up and close herself off. She always remained vulnerable because she believed that people could change. She didn't give up after one incident of mistrust; she didn't let that destroy everything she had. Instead she got determined to fix everything because she didn't want to lose what she had. The people she had were important to her, you included. That's why she tried to find you; that's why she would do anything to protect important people; even give up her own life. She really learned a lot about herself while you were gone. Back then when she wasn't very good on missions she realised that what she was best at wasn't fighting, but protecting. And that's exactly how she died, protecting you. So don't look at it as she failed the mission because she didn't come back, because in terms of Sakura this was her most successful mission because she achieved her goal; protecting someone precious to her." He explained

Sasuke took in every word Naruto said but didn't say anything. Naruto knew Sasuke wanted to be alone so without another word he disappeared in a cloud of smoke.

Sasuke looked at the letter one last time and thought about what Naruto said. He couldn't disagree more with what Sakura said in her letter. He smiled in frustration as a tear slid down his cheek.

"Typical Sakura, she reads into situations then places her own judgement above everyone else's" He thought to himself. Sasuke was a closed off person and never really showed much emotion; that much was true. But there was something Sakura didn't realise… it was something she would never know…

"You were wrong Sakura, if there's one thing you'll never know; it's how much you really meant to me…you'll never know how much I really loved you."