AN: I'm back! Thanks so much for everyone's lovely comments and patience.
This chapter I'm listening to Sixpence None The Richer – Kiss Me.
For some reason Levi and Florence make me want to listen to cheesy 90s/00s teen rom com soundtracks.
Chapter 6 – Oh, kiss me beneath the milky twilight.
Florence glanced outside the window. It was another beautiful day. She watched the rest of the Squad work and train wishing she could join them. Florence sighed as she returned to meticulously cleaning her 3DMG gear the exact way Levi had demonstrated. She muttered darkly under her breath. She had been here for one month and Hanji and her squad would be here in just a few short days. And Levi still hadn't let her use the gear. There was only two months left at most. She was a third of the way through her training and she still felt completely lost. At this rate she would never make the cut. The squad were full of support and encouragement which she was so grateful for but this was something Florence had to do on her own. Only she was responsible for her own fate and she didn't want to let anyone or, most importantly, herself down. She wanted to be useful. And she knew she could be put to her best use here. She wanted to stay here for as long as she could.
"You don't have to take out all your anger on your gear Adams" Said Levi as he leant against the door frame.
Florence halted the rough twisting of her hands. She threw the cloth she'd been cleaning with to the floor. Her hands were aching and blistered. She'd been scrubbing too hard without even realising. She'd almost gotten used to his annoying voice interrupting her every private thought.
She groaned and rolled her eyes.
"Don't worry I won't." She said directing a glare towards him.
Levi shook his head and made his way over to her. He sat down on the bench she was sitting on and passed her the cloth she had dropped.
His fingers paused on her tender palms for a moment. It had been a long time since his hands had looked like that. But he still remembered the sting. It was something you didn't forget.
Florence never gave up and she never complained no matter what she was put through. Over this past month she had surprised him greatly. She was far from the most naturally talented cadet he'd seen but she had resilience and an inner strength that was worth much more. He wondered where she got it from. He could feel her wide, hazel eyes on him and he drew his hands away.
She gripped the cloth in her hand, her knuckles blanching white.
"Captain, it's been a month already. For an entire week I've cleaned every inch of this thing. Come on, when can I-"
"You're pretty impatient you know that? Adams why are you so eager to do this?" Asked Levi.
Florence's eyes widened at his unexpected question.
"Well, if I don't learn how to use this gear then how can I join the Corps?" She replied simply.
Levi turned to her slightly causing their shoulders to brush. Her heart was going crazy. What was up with him? He never usually asked questions like this.
"I didn't mean about the gear. I mean this whole thing. Erwin said you could open up your own Practice. It'd be a better fit for you right? It'd be safer, easier-"
Florence felt her hackles begin to rise. They always did when Levi was around she couldn't help it.
"Easier for you or for me? Easy doesn't mean right. Look, I get it. You've got your own shit to deal with. Sorry for wasting so much of your time. But I'm not giving up. I'll train myself if I have to even though I don't know how." She said as her eyes burned with a determined fire.
Levi watched as she ran a hand through her short, golden hair awkwardly before she made her way towards the door.
"Adams, wait!" He called after her and caught her forearm firmly to halt her.
Florence stopped and tried to ignore the way the pads of his fingertips branded into her skin.
"That's not what I meant. You're a Doctor not a Soldier, you told me that. If you get your wings you can't just change your mind and give them back. Everyone has to have a reason for joining. Becoming a member of the survey corps isn't something you should take lightly. Just because Erwin suggested you join doesn't mean you should."
Florence relaxed against his grip and turned to face him. Levi looked genuinely concerned and it was making her feel weird. Sarcastic, indifferent Levi was so much easier to deal with. When Levi was like this she couldn't get angry at him. Everything got all mixed up when he was like this. He was being honest with her and she had no reason not to honour him with the same honesty. Florence's eyes held his. Those eyes were scarred and sometimes it hurt to look in them. She could see years of unknown pain reflected in those grey-blue irises. She held his gaze.
"What was your reason for joining?" She asked.
Florence watched as Levi's usually blank expression flickered with emotion. She'd hit a nerve.
"This isn't about me." He said coldly.
Florence let out a sigh and crossed her arms.
"You know I'm getting kinda tired of your broody, silent act. How can you accuse me of having a bullshit reason for joining when you won't even tell me what yours was? You're such a hypocrite, you always do this! Just when I actually thought you were capable of showing a tiny speck of humanity-"
Levi took her by the shoulders roughly. The look in his eyes silenced her.
"You think you know everything. You don't know shit Goldilocks. This self righteous attitude and disrespect for authority will get you killed out there. Some people don't get the choice you have, the choice to choose this life. Don't waste it. Use that brain of yours for once and don't be stupid." He said harshly.
Florence would have been angry at his words if it weren't for the look in his eyes. His words were harsh but his eyes were gentle. Suddenly the rage within her dissipated as she realised what was really going on here. He hadn't been given a choice. He'd been forced to choose this life somehow. Perhaps the life he left behind was even worse than this one. She wondered what sort of life Levi had had before he was the skilled, hard soldier that stood before her. And in that moment she acknowledged that it probably wasn't pretty. He was being so hard on her but underneath it all she could see he cared. He didn't want this for her.
Florence swallowed thickly as she cast her eyes away from his. She couldn't look any more. Once again she'd let her mouth run and she now felt exceptionally guilty.
"I'm sorry that you didn't get a choice. But my choice is that I want to join. If you think that's stupid then I guess maybe I'm stupid." She said defensively.
"You somehow find a way to twist everything I say." Said Levi with a sigh as he shook his head and dropped his hands from her shoulders.
Florence felt her intestines writhe guiltily. She felt a sudden urge to blurt out everything that was in her head and heart in that moment. And to him of all people.
"You want my reason for wanting to join? Ok, I'll level with you. I have no idea what I'm doing here. I'm exhausted and petrified. I know I'm not cut out for this and that I won't make the grade. But I have to keep trying. You're right it would be the safer option to open my own Practice but I don't want that. Out on the front line is where people need my help the most. If I die out there beyond these walls I die. But at least I'll die knowing that I tried my best to do my job. I'll die knowing I didn't choose the coward's way out. And that's all I want. So you don't have to take responsibility for me or my safety anymore. Erwin has nothing to do with it and neither do you. This is my decision. I know what I'm getting myself into." Said Florence breathlessly.
Levi watched her closely. She'd surprised him again. Her words came from the heart there was no doubt about that. He could see the sincerity and fear in her eyes. This whole time he'd been questioning why she wanted to help them. Why was she putting herself through all this when there was an easy path laid out for her? The answer was simple. Because Florence wasn't like that. She never took the easy way out. She was compassionate and caring and this girl was willing to make the ultimate sacrifice to help strangers. He understood now something he should have noticed a long time ago about her. The determined fire that drove her was the same fire that burned inside him. Their fires had been ignited by different reasons and emotions but they burned the same way. Her fire was fuelled by something entirely too pure for this world and he hoped that no matter what happened she would never lose sight of that. She was wrong about one thing though no one knew what they were getting into until they were actually out there. And by then it'd be too late.
"Good."
Florence frowned. Had Levi really just spoken? His voice had been so soft, barely a whisper.
"What?" She asked.
"Good. Now if you're done I think we should get out of here." He said.
Florence frowned with an open mouth. Her head felt like a bowl of scrambled eggs. Any extended time she spent with Levi left her brain feeling like that. He was back to his usual self. It was easier this way. But his eyes, the way he had looked. That image stayed with her long after his face became expressionless once more.
She nodded in agreement as she followed behind him.
He halted and turned to her with a shake of his head.
"With your gear Adams." He said in a bored voice.
Florence's eyes flew to Levi's.
"Captain?" She asked hesitantly.
Levi left her side and walked ahead. When she didn't follow he motioned with his hand for her to do so.
"Well don't just stand there Adams. I said grab your gear." His voice had regained its roughness once more.
Florence's eyes lit up and she leapt up on the spot letting out an uncharacteristically gleeful squeal.
Levi shook his head disapprovingly. He seriously hoped he hadn't just made a huge mistake.
"Seriously?! I could – oh, I could just hug you right now." She said with flushed cheeks and a wide grin as she spread her arms wide and walked towards him.
"Please don't." Replied Levi dryly as he stepped back a few paces.
Florence nodded shyly and retrieved her gear.
They were in a clearing in the forest. A giant, wooden crucifix like object towered over them. Florence looked up and gulped. It was tall and ropes dangled down towards her. It was like a hangman's noose. She shivered.
"What is that thing?" Asked Florence shakily.
"A test. If you pass this you get to use your gear." Said Levi watching her closely.
Florence turned to face him.
"And if I fail?" She asked with a waver in her voice.
Levi's eyes hardened.
"Talking about failing before you even try Adams? I never thought I'd see you give up so easily."
Florence's eyes widened at the almost teasing twinkle in Levi's grey eyes. She pushed the sick feeling in her stomach away as she held his gaze. Butterflies erupted in her belly. She was so nervous.
"How do I get up there?" She asked walking forwards and running her hands over the structure.
Levi felt a smile tug at the corners of his mouth as he watched her infectious eagerness.
He took the ropes attached to either side of the structure in his hands.
"Face me." He said.
Florence turned to him. Her pulse quickened at his proximity. Damn cinnamon. How did he always smell so good anyway? It was so warm and he was out training and working all day. She watched him attach the ropes carefully to her belt. She swallowed thickly as she felt his thumbs press against her hipbones as he centred her. It was so warm and her face flushed as his eyes caught hers. He stepped back and moved off to the side.
"Where are you going?" Asked Florence.
Levi said nothing and began to turn a crank at the side of the mechanism.
Florence felt her heels lift off the floor slightly. Oh God no. Her heart raced. She was going to throw up whilst falling to her death.
"You ready to fly Adams? Or are you ready to fall?"
Florence's heart hammered in her chest. She had no smart comeback to his comment. Sheer terror had taken all of her coherent thoughts away.
Florence screwed her eyes shut tight as she felt her body rise further into the air. The ropes tightened around her, she could hear them straining. Her body began to twist and jerk as she struggled to adjust to the odd sensation and find her centre of balance. She stretched her arms out to steady herself and tensed her legs. She opened her eyes and instantly regretted it.
She was high off the ground and her feet dangled precariously in mid air. She glanced over at Levi who was watching her intently. His intense stare was seriously unnerving her. She wobbled slightly and gasped as her head tilted downwards she could see nothing but green grass below. She fought to right herself and her head snapped up to be greeted with endless blue sky. She was terrified but there was something oddly exhilarating about being up here. It was freeing somehow. She kept the tension in her body but let all the fear and apprehension slip to the back of her mind. She had to do this. Be brave. She inhaled deeply and let herself relax slightly.
"Steady Adams. Good."
She glanced at Levi. He looked oddly small and insignificant from up here and she wasn't even that far from the ground level. Levi was a pretty small guy physically but his personality was so imposing that he may as well have been 100 metres tall. She wondered if this was what all humans looked like to titans. So insignificant, so small, so breakable. She shuddered at the thought.
"So am I just gonna hang around up here all day or what?" She asked in a faux bored tone hoping her voice didn't sound too shaky.
Levi walked over to the crank and pulled it hard.
"Don't get cocky Adams." He said warningly.
Florence let out a little scream as she somersaulted through the air. She gripped the ropes desperately with her fingers and regained her balance slightly before her feet touched earth once more.
"If you ever pull shit like that again I swear to God I'll -" She said shakily as she glared at him.
"You'll what?" He asked with a raised brow as he unclipped the ropes from her belt.
He watched as she wobbled slightly on unsteady legs. She had performed amazingly well for her first time. He was eager to see how she would cope with her gear now. It was encouraging. She stumbled into him slightly and she placed the palms of her hands against his chest to regain her balance. His hands instinctively fell to her waist to help steady her.
Her waist was warm and soft and his hands almost seemed to melt into her skin. Her cheeks were flushed and her eyes were slightly dazed beneath her thick lashes. He saw the Florence that hid behind that smart mouth of hers peeking through. This Florence was vulnerable and unsure. Desperately seeking reassurance but wanting to seem brave. Her fingers curled slightly in his shirt and his breath hitched slightly. He could feel his heart thump in his chest as he watched her eyes focus on his. She was looking at him too closely. She was too close. He could smell soap from her hair. It wasn't perfume. It was nothing special, just regular soap. But maybe because it was her, it smelled different. It smelled sweeter somehow.
Florence felt the dizziness fade as she steadied herself against Levi. She could feel his heart beneath her fingers. Such a steady, strong beat. Ever since she'd arrived in this world she felt as if that at any moment she would wake up back in her own world. And find this had all been one crazy dream. But Levi didn't feel like a dream. He wasn't some dreamy Prince. He was an asshole. His chest felt solid and warm beneath her fingers. His heart beat against her fingertips, his chest rising and falling with every breath, these feelings were real. This was real. She watched the way her fingers gripped onto his shirt involuntarily.
"You're not going to pass out are you? I know you have a habit of doing that."
Florence was brought out of her thoughts by his voice. She shook her head and pushed herself apart from him. Her waist felt oddly cold as his hands left her side.
"I passed out one time." She said defensively.
"Twice." He replied coolly.
Florence frowned trying to remember a second time after her arrival here.
"If you're talking about after that first training session I did NOT pass out. I fell asleep. There's a difference." She replied haughtily.
Levi smirked. He had to admit it was thoroughly enjoyable getting a reaction out of her. She was such an expressive, emotive person.
"Not to me. I still had to carry your lazy ass twice."
Florence blushed slightly momentarily stunned. She had no idea that he'd been the one that carried her after she'd first gotten here.
"Whatever. So did I pass or not?" She asked as she looked to the ground self consciously.
Florence looked at Levi when he didn't answer right away.
She sighed and swallowed the lump in her throat.
"I fucked up didn't I? I'll try again. I'll go again right now. I think I could do it better, please-"
Levi sometimes forgot that Florence wasn't born in this world. It only became glaringly obvious in moments like these where her vulnerability and naivety were exposed. She looked almost sweet standing there biting her lip and shuffling her feet. But he knew what words could be unleashed from that pretty mouth.
"Relax. It takes a while to find your balance. For a first attempt it wasn't too bad." He said with a shrug.
Florence visibly relaxed and she smiled. It was a genuine relieved smile that lit up her whole face.
"Seriously? Coming from you that must mean I was pretty good." She said with a quirk of her brow.
Her grin widened knowingly when Levi shook his head dismissively.
"I knew it. Would it kill you to compliment me just a little?" She asked.
Levi ignored her and began to walk back over to where their gear lay and Florence followed him.
"Flattery gets you nowhere."
Florence's smile widened as she shook her head at Levi's typically cold, dismissive response. This guy was the furthest thing from a dream you could get.
"Did it take you a while?" Asked Florence as she struggled to attach her gear in the way Levi had attached his so smoothly.
"What?" Asked Levi in confusion.
He sighed as he approached her and practically slapped Florence's hands away. He began fixing her gear for her fixing all her mistakes.
"To find your balance, with the gear?" She asked shyly.
She hoped he didn't mind asking so many questions. Levi was an ass but he was an intriguing ass.
Levi's fingers stilled slightly from their ministrations and Florence knew he was remembering.
"No." He replied curtly.
Florence laughed at his brief, guarded answer.
"I'm not surprised. You probably came straight out of the womb being able to do all this shit right?"
Florence watched Levi's face closely. That seemingly throwaway comment had hit a nerve again. She wondered what type of woman Levi's mother had been. Was? And what Levi had been like as a child. She struggled to imagine him being a kid. She found it difficult to imagine Levi with any expression but his scowl. But she had seen him smile once and it was kinda cute. He had that sad look in his eyes again and Florence felt that strange feeling in her gut return.
Levi stepped back from her now that her gear was attached properly.
"Don't ask questions you don't want the answers to." He said warningly.
Florence swallowed at his intense glare. His eyes in that moment looked almost like cold, colourless chips of ice.
"Who says I don't want to know the answer?" She asked holding his gaze.
"I say." He replied firmly.
"Oh come on. It's been a month since I got here. I spend most of every day with you. And I don't know anything about you." She said with a shrug and a shy blush.
Levi frowned. Why did she want to know anything about him?
"Good. This isn't a social event Adams. Are you honestly taking any of this training seriously?"
"Yes Sir!" She said with a mock salute.
Levi sighed deeply and pinched the bridge of his nose. Adams was seriously testing his patience again.
"Do you want to learn how to use your gear or not? It's getting late if we don't go now-"
"Yes. But is it so bad I want to know how you learned to use your gear? You're teaching me how to use mine. I want to know how you learned. You know, learn by example and all that stuff."
"Trust me you don't want to learn the way I did." He said meaningfully as a dark shadow crossed his face.
"What do you mean by that? Didn't you learn in the Corps?" Asked Florence with a confused frown.
Levi didn't answer her question and instead headed into the forest.
Florence jogged after him dumbstruck.
"Hey! Wait up! If you didn't learn in the Corps then where? Do other people use this gear?" She asked inquisitively.
Levi sighed. She honestly was like a little, curious, annoying kid at times. She was infuriating and he could see she wasn't going to let this one go. She never let anything go.
"Why don't you use that scientific brain of yours and figure it out for yourself. Or better yet use it for something practical instead of snooping around in people's personal lives." He said coldly.
Florence sighed as she kept pace with him.
"Christ you don't have to get so defensive all the time. Look, I'm just curious. Everyone regards you as this recruitment poster guy for the Survey Corps. Everyone here looks up to you. You're like this real, live hero. I just wanna know how you got here that's all."
Florence blushed slightly at her admission.
"I'm not a hero trust me. Let's just get started." He said curtly.
Florence rolled her eyes. Getting any personal information out of this guy was like drawing blood from a stone. A month ago it wouldn't have bothered her. She didn't have time for assholes like him. But now she knew there was more to Levi than met the eye. He was the most emotionally complex person she'd ever met. But she couldn't shake the feeling that there was something worth discovering behind those walls of his. But for now those walls were back up and they weren't coming back down.
The sun was getting low in the sky. Levi had been trying to explain the basic workings of the vertical manoeuvring gear for the past hour and Florence was still completely confused. There was nothing that technologically advanced about the equipment compared to things that existed in her own world. Yet she had never encountered anything even similar to it in her entire life back home.
"Wait run that by me one more time." Said Florence with a completely blank expression on her face.
Levi sighed and looked towards the setting sun. They didn't have much time.
Florence's head was a complete jumble of strange terminology. Triggers, grapples, gas- wait when she released the triggers what came after that? Grapples?
"I'm heading back to base. If you wanna make it there before dark I suggest you stick close."
Florence nodded as her heart exploded in her chest. Holy crap. This was it. Her fingers trembled on the triggers. Oh God this was how she was going to die. She wasn't even going to get to complete her training.
Levi shot off without warning. She watched mesmerised as his graceful form tumbled through the air. His movements were so free yet all the while he maintained complete control. He made it look so easy. Bastard.
"Don't make me come down there and drag your ass back to base again!" Shouted Levi.
Florence steeled her nerves and tensed her fists. She pressed the triggers and she was pulled forwards at brake neck speed. The world whizzed by in a green blur. Her grapples found purchase in tree bark and she attempted to adjust her balance accordingly. She wobbled and looked far from graceful but she was at least keeping Levi in her sights, even if he was miles ahead.
She pushed herself to go faster even though the branches avoided her body by millimetres. She bounded, leapt and spun through the trees feeling the wind ruffle through her hair. She was petrified but honestly Florence couldn't remember feeling more alive in her life. Her body ached from using new muscles to keep her balance but it felt good. She grinned as she felt herself let go slightly. It felt amazing actually once you got used to the sensation. She laughed and let out a happy yell as she somersaulted over a particularly gnarled branch.
Levi was just ahead.
"Don't get cocky Adams. Slow it down. Almost there."
Florence stuck her tongue out at him. Kill joy.
She watched as Levi left the cover of the trees and made his graceful descent onto the field just behind the fortress. The last dying rays of the sun bathed him in golden, pink light.
Florence panicked she was coming in way too fast and she had no idea how to fix that.
"Captain. You did not tell me how to stop!" She shouted her eyes wide with panic as the ground rushed towards her.
"Ease off the gas Adams! Shit-"
Florence hit the ground hard. She rolled until her momentum finally stopped. She lay flat on her back completely winded and aching all over. Ouch. Not good.
Her head was pounding and the bottom half of her face felt stingy and sticky. She was lying on the hard ground. Levi was leaning over her with a tense expression on his face.
Florence frowned and her eyes focused blearily on Levi.
"That was so much fun! Let's go again-ah." She winced as she brought her hand to her lips. Blood.
"Bad idea." Said Levi as he leant over her more fully.
"Aww come on why? You're no fun." Florence pouted even though it was excruciating.
Ouch. Her lip. Her head was swimming too. A dull ache thudded at the base of her skull and she could taste blood in her mouth. She felt so strange and disorientated. Her limbs were like jelly.
"Ow." She wiped the back of her hand over her bottom lip and winced.
Levi drew even closer to her. She'd never seen Levi look so worried before it was pretty adorable. His expression remained stony but his eyes were darting over her face quickly.
"Captain, I did it. I really flew." She said gazing up at him.
He was so beautiful in this light she had to admit. The first few evening stars were beginning to peek out behind his head.
Levi nodded.
"Did I do good?" She asked weakly.
Levi nodded.
"Don't talk. Just rest." He said firmly.
"But I don't wanna rest. I wanna fly." She said impatiently.
Levi pinned her arms firmly even though there was no danger of her going anywhere.
"Adams you seriously fucked yourself up in that poor excuse for a landing. Just lay down."
Florence attempted to wriggle out of his grasp but she was too tired and weak and he was too strong.
"Well whose fault was that? You didn't teach me how to land!"
She replied dryly before bursting into a fit of uncontrollable giggles before the pain in her ribs and head put a stop to that.
"Ow. I think I have a concussion." She said as she clutched the base of her skull. It felt hot and sticky. She attempted to focus on her fingers as she drew them to her face. More blood. Just great.
"Wow nice diagnosis doc. You just whacked your head off the ground at high speed and almost grazed the entire bottom half of your face off. Of course you're concussed." He said dryly.
Florence laughed. She must have looked pretty ridiculous and the concussion was making her delirious.
"All right Mr Sarcastic since you're so medically clued up help me patch this mess up then. Can you get the things out of my pack?" She asked.
"I don't think I'd be much help." He replied with a shake of his head.
"Hey don't say that. I think you'd make a pretty good medical assistant." She said with a teasing look in her eyes.
Levi shook his head again.
"I don't think I have the bed side manner for it." He replied.
Florence attempted to keep focused on his eyes. They were so warm in this light. They twinkled like the stars. But it was difficult. Her head felt fuzzy and her eyes were tired.
"I don't know about that. I think you could be pretty charming if you tried." She said huskily.
It was hard to tell in the light but it almost looked as if he was blushing. But she couldn't be sure. She was pretty sure guys like Levi were incapable of blushing.
Levi rolled his eyes.
"You're crazy enough on your own without this concussion too."
Florence attempted to sit up but Levi pushed her back while he pulled random objects from her pack.
"You love it. I bet your life was really boring and predictable before I came along."
Levi shook his head.
"No it was quiet and a lot less stressful." He admitted truthfully.
But Levi had to admit he had felt different ever since Florence had arrived. There was something about her. Something positive and pure that seemed to change everything that surrounded and came into contact with her. But he'd never admit that to anyone especially her. I mean she was lying there with a big goofy grin on her face with blood pissing out of her mouth and head. He'd never met anyone like her.
Florence sat up slowly and picked the objects from Levi's hands that she needed. She seriously hoped nothing would need stitched.
"How bad does it look?" She asked with a wince.
Levi shrugged.
"Not so bad." He said.
"Liar. Your eyes give you away you know." She said smiling at him.
Levi frowned at her comment but didn't say anything.
Florence popped the cork out of the bottle from her pack. The smell of alcohol burned her nostrils.
"Alcohol?" He asked with a frown.
"For purely disinfectant purposes of course. Ok I need you to pour this on the cut on my head and then tell me how deep it looks."
Levi's eyes widened slightly.
Florence laughed at his expression.
"Don't tell me you're scared of a little blood Captain?" She asked teasingly.
Levi shook his head.
"Of course not. I just never did this before." He said defensively.
"Well I can teach you. I'll be gentle with you since it's your first time" She said softly.
This time she knew for sure that the impossible to fluster Captain Levi was blushing. And it was perhaps the cutest thing she'd ever witnessed.
Levi moved behind her but before he could start Florence took the bottle back off of him.
"Wait a sec." She said as she took a large swig from the bottle.
The alcohol pricked her tongue and burned all the way down to her belly. She coughed slightly.
"I thought you said it was purely for disinfectant purposes?" He asked.
She passed the bottle back.
"Just a little Dutch courage. Good with the Doctor thing not so much with the patient thing."
"What's Dutch courage? Where did you get this stuff anyway?" Asked Levi as he examined the bottle.
"Uh- never mind. It's just an expression where I come from. I found it when you forced me to clean that massive room all by myself."
Levi rolled his eyes.
"Ok I'm ready when you are." Said Florence exhaling shakily.
Florence pushed up her hairline with her fingers and braced herself.
Levi knelt behind her and tried to carefully pour the alcohol over the wound. There was a lot of blood matted into her golden hair.
He felt Florence wince and he placed his hand on the juncture between her shoulder and neck to steady her. He had absolutely no idea what he was doing. It was a sensation that was occurring more and more often in her presence. He didn't have a problem looking at or attempting to fix his own wounds but somehow he found it difficult to look at hers. She was so gentle and soft. He didn't like seeing her hurt. He felt very protective of her and that scared him. She'd got hurt because he'd fucked up. He should have been more careful with her. He'd been angry because she'd gotten too close and now she was hurt. That's what happened to everyone that got close to him. He wouldn't let anything else happen to her.
Levi's hand was gentle at the base of her neck. She shivered slightly from his warm touch on such a sensitive area.
"What does it look like? Is it deep?" Asked Florence as she passed him a cloth.
Levi gently wiped the area down. The wound was just at the base of her skull and barely two inches across. It wasn't deep and the blood seemed to be clotting already.
"It isn't deep." He replied. Florence sighed in relief.
"Good. Ok. Hold this against the wound while I wrap around." She said.
Levi held a small cloth square to her head whilst applying gentle pressure. Florence nimbly trapped his fingers beneath a bandage.
"Ok now slide your fingers out gently."
Levi did as instructed and Florence tightened the bandage accordingly. Levi came back round and crouched down facing her. She looked like a little kid with that bandage wrapped around her head.
Florence noticed Levi looked a little lost and pale. She squeezed his hand reassuringly.
"Good. Now pass me that cloth please." She asked softly.
Levi glanced at their intertwined blood crusted knuckles in the dim light. Her hands were ice cold and she was trembling. She was probably in shock. He slid his hand from hers ignoring the tingling sensation and shuffled out of his jacket. He placed it gently over her shoulders.
Florence blushed at the sweet gesture. She pulled it around her shoulders tightly. It was so warm and smelled like him.
"Thanks." She said with a shy smile.
Levi shook his head as he passed her the cloth. Florence doused it in alcohol.
"Fuck this is going to hurt." She said as hesitated before pressing it to her face.
Levi pushed the bottle back into her hands and she nodded taking another swig. It burned against her split lip. God this stuff was bad.
"Cheers." She said as she grimaced and handed the bottle back to him. She let out a whine of pain as the alcohol touched the tender grazed flesh on her face. Her lip hurt the most.
"How does it look?" She asked.
Levi hesitated before answering. Her lip was burst and her entire chin was grazed and raw. It didn't look deep or serious but this world had already left its mark on her. He glanced up to the shiny pink scar on her forehead that she'd gotten a month ago when she first came here. Now she'd have at least two to join it. She was still smiling and incredibly beautiful. Smiling through the pain like always. He hoped she'd never stop. He had only seen her cry once and even then it had only been a few dignified tears. She was stronger and kinder than this world was cruel. He knew that for sure now.
"Ugly." He replied with a crooked smile.
Florence laughed even though everything ached. He looked so different when he smiled like that.
"Now that's the truth."
She held the cloth against her face as she took another drink of the awful alcohol.
"You did good. You know if you ever decide to retire from the Survey Corps you'd make a great surgical nurse."
Levi shook his head and hesitated as she placed the bottle in his hands. He didn't usually drink alcohol. He used to enjoy drinking when he was younger. When he'd been in the Underworld with Isabel and Farland. They'd shared more than a few bottles in their time. Stuff stronger and worse than this too. He smiled sadly at the memory. He'd been thinking of them earlier too.
Levi shrugged as he sat down beside her. He wiped the rim of the bottle with his shirt cuff and took a sip.
Florence laughed at his screwed up expression.
"Pretty nasty right? I don't have cooties you know."
Levi nodded and frowned.
"What are cooties?"
Florence laughed. She'd forget for so long that she wasn't from here then things like this would happen.
"Where I'm from it's like this made up disease. Kids think they can catch it from other girls and boys that they kiss or whatever. Pretty dumb huh?"
Levi's frown deepened. Her world literally made no sense to him. Why would you invent a fake disease for teasing purposes?
"But we didn't kiss." He said.
Florence smiled and circled her thumb around the neck of the bottle that Levi was still holding.
"Maybe not directly."
Levi rolled his eyes and tried to ignore the fact that his face felt uncommonly warm.
"We should get you back inside. It's late. You need your rest."
Florence nodded.
"Before we go. I just wanted to say thank you for everything today."
"What?" He asked genuinely surprised.
She watched his narrow eyes widen slightly and smiled.
"Even although I made a complete ass of myself and almost grazed my face off. It was the most amazing feeling I ever felt being up there. I didn't know I could feel that way. Even back home, I never felt that way before. So free like nothing else in the world mattered. It's hard to explain I guess. But thank you for showing that to me."
Levi shook his head dismissively but she saw that his eyes had softened at her words.
"You got your wings." He said placing his hand over the silky Survey Corps badge on the jacket that now rested over her shoulders.
Florence smiled and blushed.
"They look pretty good on me huh?"
Levi shook his head.
"You're gonna have to work really hard to get your own." He said honestly.
Florence nodded.
"I know. I'm ready for it."
Levi looked at her determined profile in the fading light. She was ready he could see that. She was ready to overcome anything in her path.
"You really wanna know how I learned to use my gear?"
Florence's mouth opened slightly and she winced as the cloth slipped in surprise. Why was Levi being so open with her all of a sudden? She watched him take another swig. Maybe the alcohol had loosened him up.
"Yeah I really do." She said softly.
Levi leant closer looking in her eyes. Her eyes were slightly unfocused and her pupils were blown probably a combination of the head injury and the alcohol.
"I stole my first 3DMG."
Florence's eyes widened.
"Stole it?" She asked intrigued.
All the pain she felt seemed to fade as she waited on him to answer.
"I didn't always live up here behind the walls. I lived in the Underworld way below the city like a rat in a sewer amongst all the stinking shit and scum of this world. There if you didn't steal you didn't eat. If you didn't eat you didn't live. I did what I had to do to survive."
Florence shuffled closer. Pleading to know more like a child getting a bedtime story read to her. Levi was actually telling her real, personal information about his life. She doubted many people would have heard this, well straight from the source anyway.
"Yeah but 3DMG isn't exactly a loaf of bread." She said incredulously.
Levi passed her back the bottle and she took another drink.
"I thought it was the only way to get out of that shithole. You think this place is bad; you don't even want to imagine that place. But when I flew I didn't feel so trapped. I felt free just like how you said."
Florence passed him back the bottle. She could hear the genuine emotion in his voice. She felt a tremendous, overwhelming need to reach out to him in that moment. He'd been through so much. She didn't know the half of it. It felt so nice sitting here with him just talking beneath the twilight stars sharing a bottle of awful, cheap hooch between them. They weren't so different she realised in that moment. Not so different at all.
"Wow." Said Florence breathlessly.
She had no idea what else to say.
"Did that surprise you?" He asked as he watched her carefully.
Florence nodded but hesitated.
"Yeah a little. It changes the way I see you." She replied truthfully.
Her head felt so strange. Everything had a surreal quality to it even this conversation.
She could see Levi was intrigued by her response even though he hid it well.
"You really want to know what I think about you now but you're trying to pretend you don't care aren't you?"
Florence smiled as she saw his reaction.
She watched the fleeting moment of surprise cross his face before he replaced it with casual nonchalance.
"Honestly knowing what it must've taken for you to get to where you are now from that place only makes me like and respect you more."
"So being a completely morally corrupt person makes you respect me more? That's some fucked up logic."
Florence rolled her eyes at his self deprecating response.
"Do you have to twist everything I say? You aren't morally corrupt. People change and grow. You aren't the same person you were then."
Levi shrugged.
"Maybe."
He didn't care to admit how her kind, honest words had affected him. Florence wasn't like anyone he had ever met before. She always fought to see the best side in people even if there wasn't a best side to see.
Florence watched his expression in the dying light. He was looking away from her into the distance. He was remembering. She didn't know why she did it. Maybe it was the concussion, or the sad look in his grey eyes but she felt compelled to touch him, to comfort him. Her free hand that wasn't pressing the cloth against her face hesitantly reached out. She pressed her palm against his cheek. This was really stupid. She wasn't thinking straight. She was glad she wouldn't remember this tomorrow.
His skin was cool and smooth, freshly shaven. Her fingers reached behind his ear and gently massaged small circles into the shaved hairs at his hairline. Her thumb ran along the edge of his jawbone slowly. She could feel him tensing and she could feel his narrowed, questioning eyes on her but she dared not look into them. Not yet. Her heart was racing and her mouth felt completely dry. What was she doing? Stop! But she couldn't. She watched her thumb continue its slow journey across his jaw until it slipped into the soft, warm hollow at the corner of his mouth. She gulped as she watched his pale lips part slightly. She wanted to touch them but even in her concussed state she knew that would be the worst possible idea. She instead let her thumb fall back to his jaw and let her hand rest at the back of his neck beneath his crisp shirt collar.
She finally let her eyes meet his and she really wished she hadn't.
Levi wondered what was going through Florence's head. He knew she was concussed and possibly tipsy but in that moment she seemed perfectly aware of what she was doing. He hadn't drank in a while and the alcohol was definitely doing its job. His whole body felt looser and his common sense was clouding fast too. He was taken off guard when he felt her caress his cheek.
Florence's touch was gentle and hesitant on his face. He tensed. His heart was racing and her fingers felt like they were burning into his skin. It was an innocent touch but an intimate one. Levi hadn't felt the touch of anyone in a long time. He wasn't someone that craved it like others he had encountered in the corps. He had no time for such weak urges to cloud his focus. But right now he couldn't focus on anything but her. He silenced the voice in his head that screamed at him to make this stop. She wasn't in her right mind. This made no sense. It was wrong and he knew it. But in that moment he didn't care. He could feel himself letting go as he lost himself in the feel of her touch and the depths of her eyes. Her eyes were dark and hazy as she looked up at him through her lashes. Her lip was bloody and swollen. He was responsible for that. He should have taken better care of her. But he didn't know how. He'd never taken care of anyone before. Her face moved closer to his suddenly but he didn't pull back.
"I know you're a good person. You have your wings now. You're free. You don't ever need to go back to that place or the person you were there." She whispered.
He was so beautiful. She'd never seen him look at her the way he was now. She wanted to kiss him. It was possibly the stupidest idea she'd ever had but she couldn't help it. Maybe she'd been fighting the urge for a while without even realising. He wasn't pulling away. She was going to kiss him. She couldn't breathe. Her concussion and her aching ribs were all but forgotten. Their faces pulled even closer. She felt his breath on her lips. Alcohol and cinnamon. She let her eyes flutter closed.
Footsteps. She felt Levi push her away gently and he stood to face the fast approaching footsteps. She couldn't deny the disappointment she felt at not getting to feel his lips press against hers. The moment was broken and she wondered if Levi would ever let himself be so vulnerable with her again. Probably not. She watched the back of his head helplessly as he spoke with Eren before leaving urgently. He didn't look back at her.
Florence's heart raced as she heard Eren's footsteps approaching. She felt sick with panic and worry. They'd almost kissed what the hell?! They would have if Eren hadn't interrupted them. How? Why? Stupid alcohol and stupid head injury.
"Eren how much of that did you see?" She asked as she pressed her head against her knees shamefully.
"Truthfully?" Asked Eren nervously.
Florence felt her cheeks heat shamefully and she groaned.
"I tried to wait as long as possible but it was an urgent message so…sorry?" Said Eren genuinely apologetically.
Florence looked at him and shook her head.
"Don't be. I'm glad you interrupted or I would've did something really, really stupid."
Eren nodded and held out his hand for her to take. She took it eagerly.
Eren helped her walk as she clutched her bruised ribs.
"The wings look good on you." Said Eren with a smile.
Florence frowned then glanced down at her jacket. Well it was his jacket really. She blushed.
"I flew today Eren and I'm going to fly again."
Eren nodded with a grin.
"I know."
Florence smiled as they settled into comfortable chatter as Eren led her to her room wishing her a good night.
As she lay back on her pillows every inch of her body aching. Levi's face only inches from hers flashed into her mind. His eyes had been so warm. He had wanted to kiss her too. He could deny it as much as he wanted but she had seen. Who knew the hardest part of training wouldn't be the training at all. Levi was driving her crazy. She couldn't wait to forget all about this. The feeling before their lips had met had almost felt like the sensation she had experienced earlier as she flew through the forest. Exhilarating and terrifying all at once. She wanted to feel that way again and that terrified her more than anything she had faced in this world so far.
AN: Sorry that was so long! Next chapter I promise Hanji and the others will start to appear. I'm thinking two more chapters of training maximum then we'll be onto the start of the female titan arc. Woop! Until next time thanks for reading and much love.