When Brittany got home that night, she expected to find Santana passed out on the couch. She actually would've preferred it. The way Santana yelled at her shook her to the core and she wasn't sure if she was prepared for something like that again. But Santana was sitting on the sofa wide awake and Brittany set her bag down.

"Hey." She said tentatively. She wasn't sure if she could just rush into the bedroom and lock herself in there until it all blew over. Santana stood up and walked up to her and Brittany tensed a little, readying herself.

"I'm sorry." Santana said, taking Brittany by surprise. The blond relaxed. "I shouldn't have yelled at you like that. I didn't know that you had started working again but I still shouldn't have lost my temper." Santana looked at the ground when she said all of that. She was too embarrassed to meet Brittany's eyes but Brittany felt a wave of relief wash over her. It didn't take the sting out completely but it certainly soothed it a little.

"It's ok." Brittany said.

"But it's not, is it?" Santana asked. Brittany gave a weak smile.

"It's hard for both of us." She replied and Santana nodded in agreement.

"How was work?" She asked. Brittany shrugged. Santana remembered a time when Brittany would come in, flop down onto Santana's lap and chatter endlessly about her day. Sometimes Santana listened, sometimes she zoned out but it didn't matter and more importantly, she never had to grasp for conversation topics. If she didn't talk, Brittany would be more than happy to fill the silence. Now the two of them stood awkwardly in the living room while Santana tried to make small talk so that the deafening silence would go away.

"I'm mostly relearning everything but David said that I pick things back up pretty quickly. I need to do a lot of stretching though." At the mere mention of David's name, Santana winced though Brittany had blinked just in time to miss the split second that it happened. After a period of strained silence, Santana tried again.

"So...things are good? The kids?"

"Yeah, I haven't had the heart to tell them that I don't remember them. I've mostly been picking up their names either through conversation or through David."

Stop saying his name. Santana pleaded in her head.

"Sounds like you're having fun." Santana said unenthusiastically.

"How was your day?" Brittany asked.

"Nothing exciting."

Tell me something about you. Brittany thought. Anything at all. Tell me...tell me what things line your desk.

"I want to know." Brittany said.

"I mean...we just signed a deal another multimillion dollar deal so that's something to celebrate. I almost botched it though..." Santana stopped short. Any more and she would've added "because I was taking care of you." to the end of it. Brittany however, saw the hesitation and guessed what she was about to say. Brittany nodded and smiled, letting a sad chuckle slip from her throat.

"Well, I'm going to bed. It's been a long day." She turned and headed towards the door. Just as she did, Santana reached for her and missed grabbing her hand by a hair. Brittany didn't notice the gesture that screamed "don't leave me." Santana was rooted to the spot, the image of Brittany and Dave still fresh in her mind.

The week rolled by and the two barely saw one another. Santana still worked overtime to help cover the medical bills and Brittany stayed late to practice. When Santana showed up at work the Monday after, she found Quinn sitting there on her desk, her arms folded impatiently.

"Seriously, Santana, do you not understand the concept of 'day off'?" Quinn demanded. Santana blinked at her absently. She had totally forgotten that because they'd won the contract, they got the next Monday off.

"So what are you doing here?" Santana asked.

"Making sure you leave." Quinn replied, hopping off of the desk. "Come to my place, let's hang out." Santana knew that was code for "I need to talk to you about the shit you're doing wrong."

"Sure." Santana sighed. She was too tired to really care about what Quinn wanted to harp on her about. She followed Quinn out the door and they got into their respective cars. Santana didn't follow Quinn, she knew the way and actually got to Quinn's place before the other girl. She was waiting at the door when the blond exited the elevator.

"You ran a red light." Quinn noted.

"No one saw." Santana replied, getting up as Quinn unlocked the door. Her apartment was about the same size as Brittany and Santana's but it was not in the city and therefore cost significantly less. It was immaculate and pristine. Quinn was a bit of a neat freak. Out of the three of them, Quinn was cleanest. Brittany was next and Santana was last. That certainly did not mean Santana was sloppy, it simply meant Santana was ok with leaving the dishes out for a day or two.

Quinn on the other hand instinctively picked up Santana's jacket when she dropped it on the couch and hung it up. Santana sat down while Quinn fixed them drinks.

"Spill Fabray. What do you want to bitch to me about?" Santana sighed. Quinn sat down opposite to her and stared at her angrily.

"What the hell are you doing?" Quinn hissed.

"You're going to need to elaborate a little more." Santana deadpanned.

"I went grocery shopping the other day and guess who I saw?" Santana shrugged in differently. "Brittany. But hey, guess what else? She wasn't alone! She was with that two-faced slimeball." Santana smiled a little, knowing exactly who she was referring to. "Santana, what the hell are you even doing back home? Are you trying to give Brittany to him?"

"I'm not in love with her. What does it matter?" Quinn slammed her glass on the table.

"That is the biggest load of bullshit I have ever fucking heard. I am about three seconds away from slapping you." Santana felt the anger rise up in her chest. How did she even presume to understand how she felt?

"You try it, Fabray, I'll beat you in your own home."

"You have not fallen out of love with Brittany. There is no fucking way. You want to know what happened? You've become a coward."

"I swear to God, Quinn, I will beat you senseless!"

"You want to be tragic."

"You don't fucking understand! I've hurt her! I saw her last Monday with Dave and she looked so happy with him." Quinn's eyes bulged. "I want her to be happy."

"You saw them together?" She asked in disbelief. "You saw them and didn't do anything?" Santana looked at her feet. "Who the hell are you? The Santana I know would've punched him in the face. The Santana I know gets what she wants. I have no idea who you are."

"I'm not a..."

"Shut up. The Santana I know loves Brittany no matter what."

"She's not Brittany." Quinn got up and slapped Santana hard across the face.

"Don't you dare say that." Quinn hissed. "I thought you were just grieving when you said that the first time. I even forgave it the second time. But you actually believe that. I don't know what the hell is wrong with you but that is your fucking wife, always has, always will be. But it's easier for you to think of her otherwise because then you have nothing to lose. When I helped you pack up your marriage, if I had known that you were packing her up too, I would've left her at the hospital. I thought better of you. But you're not even trying." Quinn's voice was filled with anger and betrayal. Santana let the sting of Quinn's hands and words linger on her. She knew Quinn was right. She knew she was giving up. But even hearing that, even knowing that didn't change how she was feeling. She knew Brittany was physically her wife but mentally? Emotionally?

"I want to love her." Santana whispered. "But our love was based on memories, on everything we experienced."

"Then make new memories with her." Quinn said, throwing up her hands. "Because deep down, she's still Brittany Lopez-Pierce."

Santana went home shortly after that. When she walked in, she looked around. Everything that reminded Santana of their relationship was gone. She sat down at the kitchen table and closed her eyes. Everyday she felt them growing further and further apart. Sometimes they'd go to bed without saying anything to each other. Santana got up and walked into the bedroom. She noticed a new book on Brittany's nightstand and the slippers at the foot of the bed. The drawers were open and their clothes were still separated. The covers were messy. She must've been in a hurry, Santana thought and started walking out the door. She paused and whirled back around.

It was such a small detail, maybe not even worth mentioning or looking into. It could've been pure coincidence but it made Santana stop dead in her tracks.

Brittany had not touched one side of the bed, specifically Santana's side. Santana felt her heart pounding. Brittany couldn't have known. This was supposed to be just her bed. Brittany could've taken up the whole of the bed but she stuck to the side that was hers. Santana stared at the bed for a while.

She thought about what Quinn said. She wasn't even trying and she should be. It wasn't just the memories that made their relationship, it was who they were. She knew it was her responsibility.

Brittany was dancing with David. He was teaching her how to position her body during lifts. He was strong and he held her with a certain care that she had never seen him express with other women. They were alone in the studio again, reveling in the short break between classes. Dave set her down and put his hand on her shoulder.

"You seem distracted. Everything ok?" He asked.

"Yeah, just...just processing everything still." Brittany replied.

"Let me know if there's anything I can do." He said, pulling her in for a hug.

"You're sweet." Brittany said. Dave flashed her a white smile and his eyes lit up.

"Oh! I forgot!" He rushed over to his bag. He fished around for a moment before returning. He held a yellow daisy in his hand. "It was growing outside my house. I don't know if you remember but they're your favorite. I was hoping it would make you feel better." Brittany blushed and took the flower.

"Thanks..." She whispered. She walked over to her water bottle and put the flower in water. Dave watched her with loving eyes. It was now or never.

"Hey Brit?" He said, his voice echoing in the empty room. She looked up at him. His heart raced just meeting her eyes. "Let's go out on a date." Brittany's eyes widened.

"Wh-what?" She stammered.

"A date. You know, dinner, movie, walk along the river. You remember what a date is, right?"

"I know!" She exclaimed. "But..."

"I've been in love with you since I first met you. I've just never said anything to you." Because of Santana, Dave finished in his head.

"I just...I mean you're really sweet and nice." Brittany said. "But...I just don't know. It seems weird since I don't remember anything."

"I don't care. I love you for you." Dave replied. Brittany bit her lip. Something felt off but he was the only one she felt really comfortable with. They had chemistry dancing, he was good looking and obviously cared deeply about her. There was no reason for her to say no.

"Sure." She replied. David laughed aloud in surprise. He sprinted over to her and picked her up. Brittany laughed too but she couldn't shake the feeling that she was doing something wrong.

Winter was always harsh where they lived. That night was especially so. Santana waited impatiently for Brittany to get home. When she did, Santana stood up quickly.

"Do you want to go out?" She asked. Brittany blinked in shock. First Dave and now Santana?

"What?" She said dumbly.

"Outside." Santana clarified and Brittany relaxed a little.

"Oh."

"I know this really good hot cocoa place down the street." Santana offered.

"Oh, yeah, that sounds good." She replied, still slightly ruffled. "It's really cold. Hot cocoa sounds delicious." Santana nodded and grabbed her coat.

It was bitter cold outside. Brittany hugged her coat close to her body and walked alongside Santana in silence. The cocoa shop was only two blocks away but they were shivering and their teeth were chattering by the time they got there.

"Two white hot cocoas." Santana ordered. The two warmed themselves in a booth while they waited. Brittany was preoccupied with Dave's sudden admittance of love. They hadn't set a date yet because David was going on a small tour with one of his dance groups for two weeks. He made her promise that they would go as soon as he came back. Brittany was slightly glad for the distance. It gave her more time to think.

Their hot chocolates arrived and Brittany sipped hers. Her eyes lit up and she licked her lips.

"Good huh?" Santana asked. Brittany nodded enthusiastically.

"Amazing." Brittany concluded. Santana smiled at her and Brittany's cheeks turned a slight pink. She suddenly had a lot less to say. When Santana smiled, it was like her body was filled with warmth and Brittany wondered if it was because of the hot chocolate.

Santana watched as Brittany studied her surroundings. She could still feel herself wanting to drift away from this new girl but Quinn was right. She had to try to accept this new Brittany. Santana let out a small sigh, causing Brittany to look forward and gasp.

"San! It's snowing!" Santana's heart skipped a beat when she heard Brittany say her pet name. Brittany got up and quickly went outside. Santana followed. Outside, Brittany was laughing and twirling in the snow and the light from the shop illuminated the joy in her blue eyes.

Santana felt it. It was the death of her love for the old Brittany. It wrenched at her heart painfully as she watched.

Brittany looked over at Santana, the Latina's eyes sparkling with unshed tears. The words left her mouth before she could stop them.

"Smile, San. You look prettier when you smile."

It was like a fire had gone out. It had left only charred remains of the passion they once shared. Santana cried silently, her tears stinging her wind whipped face. Brittany made her way over. There were snowflakes on her long eyelashes and her breath came out in wisps. She studied Santana's shining eyes.

"Hey." She said softly. "It'll be ok." A laugh escaped Santana's dry throat.

"I'm the one who is supposed to say that to you." She said. Brittany reached out.

And Santana realized why she had been falling out of love with her. It was a purge. It wasn't out of fear, it wasn't because she didn't love Brittany anymore. Her heart was preparing her.

Brittany's hand touched Santana's.

In the ashes that the previous love left after burning out, a small ember remained. That ember was the start.

Snow covered Brittany's head, the light reflecting off of it, giving it almost a saintly glow. Santana could feel the gentleness of her gaze.

She'd fallen out of love with the old Brittany to fall in love with the new one.

A car drove towards them and they hurried out of the street. That moment ended but both of them felt that something had changed between them.

Nothing was outwardly different; they walked back in silence and bid each other an awkward goodnight. Santana still slept on the couch, Brittany still closed the door to the room. But the silence wasn't strained anymore, it was more settled. An unexpressed happiness passed between them and while the outside got colder and colder, they only got warmer with a mysterious growing feeling.

It was still the same distance; a wall, a hallways, a few feet of carpet. Mentally, it was leagues that the two had walked together, two decades of memories that only Santana remembered and so much more that separated the two. But it felt a lot closer than before.