Chapter Five: We're All Mad Here!
When I woke up the morning after the big shin-dig, I had a throbbing headache from sleeping too long, too hard. Bliss was still sprawled on her bed and I sniffed, pushing back my hair from my face. She craned her neck to look at me and I groaned.
"So. You got in late."
"I was sleeping. On the floor. Believe me I'm paying for it." I was. My left hip and shoulder were killing me. OW.
She smiled smugly. "You know who carried you in last night?" I had a suspicion but no, actually, I didn't want to confirm it. "Aragorn. How did that come about, missy?"
I sighed. "Well. I might've just gone on and slept in the Hall but chivalry isn't dead here."
"Mm-hmm." She raised an eyebrow as she stretched, communicating her disbelief.
"Ugh!" I growled and promptly fell off the bed. "Oh, fiddlesticks-fuck-chandelier."
Bliss burst out laughing. "What the hell was that?"
"Phoenix? Bliss?" Son of a-
Bliss snickered as I slapped a hand over my eyes. "Come in!" I pulled the blanket off my bed to cover my face with that too. Gah.
Aragorn entered our room with some minor trepidation. I peered at him from under my blanket and, when he glanced down at me, sat up foolishly. If you can sit up like a fool.
"Is...all well?" he asked cautiously. Bliss grinned.
"Peachy keen. Nix might need some help getting"- I scrambled upright before she could finish her rather damning statement, eyes blazing a clear "SHUT THE FUCK UP."
Aragorn wisely decided not to comment on this brief exchange. "Elrond would like to speak with you before the Council," he announced.
Oh holy shit. "Oh." Without turning my head, I met Bliss' eyes. She looked as equally alarmed as I felt.
"Elanor shall take you to him once you are ready. I will see you at the Council." He smiled briefly and then split, shutting the door behind him.
I plunked down onto my bed. "Well."
"Yep." Bliss cocked an eyebrow. Then we burst out laughing. It was like high school all over again.
Fifteen minutes later, Elanor hustled us down to wherever we were meeting Elrond. I was wolfing down a peach (I think it was a peach) and nearly choked on the fuzzy skin of it. It was earlier than I'd have liked it to be, but that really couldn't be helped.
Bliss, who could wake up at any time and still exude put-together-ed-ness, had her game face on. That is, she looked ready for a court proceeding, gun fight, or wedding. Capable, is the word. Which was good, since I had never been a morning person and was likely going to end up yawning in Lord Elrond's face.
Speaking of the elf-lord, he greeted us as we arrived with such a distant smile I was pretty sure he wouldn't have noticed or cared had I yawned, but I was too cowed by the circumstances to test this theory.
"Gandalf seems to belief that you are telling the truth and have been...foretold," he stated bluntly. I blinked, a bit stunned and then indignant. Duh, we were telling the truth!
Bliss looked just as stunned as I was, but more suspicious. "How d'you mean- 'foretold'?"
"Whether he is right or not remains to be seen, yet I agree that there must be more to your presence here. This, among many other things, we will discuss at the Council. Until a decision has been made, you are welcome to stay in Rivendell until your paths are known to you."
Well. That was one thing taken care of, at least. We weren't being thrown out on our ear.
"Thank you," I said, after a beat of silence. Bliss echoed me and then we were pleasantly dismissed. That was short, confusing and just plain scary!
Walking along (neither of us had a destination in mind, which would have been okay, had we known our way around), Bliss and I began to talk.
"So. We have a place to stay!" I said, trying to get a handle on things.
"Yeah, for how long? And what the hell was up with the foretold business?"
I blew my breath out to stall. "Oh, the usual. Girls go to strange land in the middle of a massive battle of good versus evil, there's a prophecy entailing how they help save the world, we'll be home in time for tea."
Bliss looked at me unhappily. "I never did want to save the world. It always seemed too..."
"Captain America?"
"Yeah." We wandered along in silence. "Frankly, I think it's all bullshit."
I twisted my mouth up thoughtfully. "The foretelling and whatnot?" She nodded. "Could be." Then a loud bell pealed out and I remembered the Council. I didn't think we were invited but about thirty seconds later, Elanor was dragging us to the secret meeting. How she managed to find us was beyond me. Magical elf senses?
I was still thinking about the whole business of our being there. I didn't feel like some legend turned flesh and blood. I felt like a mistake that needed editing. There was just something that wasn't right about this whole thing. Something beyond Bliss and my presence there. Like maybe something fundamental had changed and the Universe decided that reinforcements of some kind were needed.
As I was thinking this, working it out slowly in my mind, Frodo, Bilbo and Gandalf arrived to our little powwow. Elrond stood to introduce the hobbit to our mix of elves and dwarves and men.
"Here, my friends, is the hobbit, Frodo son of Drogo. Few have ever come hither through greater peril or on an errand more urgent." Bliss turned towards me to make a pompous face and I rolled my lips together to hide the smile.
Many more people were introduced, including Gimli and Glorfindel and Erestor and Legolas and Boromir. Elrond seemed ready to move on but no few people were cutting their eyes at Bliss and me furtively. The elf-lord sighed.
"These," he said, a bit less formally, "are Bliss and Phoenix, from distant country, seeking guidance." I smiled at the lie and Bliss coughed delicately as some of the men sniffed at our rather feminine presence. Assholes.
The dwarves began by reporting on the state of Moria and the disturbing visit from what I was pretty sure was a Black Rider, and his threats about the Ring. Then Elrond started to tell the very, very long tale about the History of Middle Earth and I zoned out a bit. It was like being back in high school. Only with more magic and less humor.
Not that I was bored. Completely. Just thinking a bit too much and not in a very studious mood, understand.
After Elrond came Boromir, with news from Gondor and his and his brother's dream. Aragorn stood up and was saying something about his broken sword but I was distracted by Bliss.
She was frowning and when I caught her eye, she mouthed, I have a really bad feeling, which, if you know Bliss, was something to pay attention to, as her feelings tended to be accurate. That sixth sense of hers had gotten us out of scrapes just in the nick of time back in the day and I mouthed back, why, do you think? She shrugged but then I noticed Frodo get up and realized.
"Behold Isildur's Bane," Elrond intoned gravely and I flinched.
The Ring was very simple, like a wedding band. Except, you know, evil. Still, a weird, tense feeling briefly silenced the Council and I swallowed, turning my gaze to my hands and keeping my head down for what I think was a very long time.
Bliss, too, seemed totally out of the loop and we sat there as Gandalf and Bilbo and Frodo and the others all talked about the Ring and other various not-so-good stuff.
It was really weird, sitting there, paying half attention to what was going on around me and using the rest of my brain to think hard on stuff. I pieced together a pretty iffy idea of how exactly we had gotten there; a lot of the concept came from the Chronicles of Narnia and had to do with a little rift in the universe that Bliss and I had accidentally slipped through. I was also thinking about the Valar and God and wondering what this would mean on that front and then there was the whole question of if we would be going back and, if so, what would have happened there, which again brought to mind the Chronicles of Narnia.
At the same time, I listened as Bilbo told the story of his adventure, Gandalf shared about Saruman joining forces with Sauron and everyone discussed the fate of the Ring.
It was the silence that snapped my attention to the here and now. The noon bell was ringing but everyone seemed lost in thought. Bliss and I had faded to the end of the list of important things to talk about, which was fine with me.
"I will take the Ring," Frodo declared quietly. "Though I do not know the way."
Gandalf stood to stand by the hobbit. "I will help you bear this burden, Frodo Baggins, as long as it is yours to bear."
Aragorn rose to his feet as well and said, "If by my life or death I can protect you, I will. You have my sword."
"And you have my bow," Legolas joined.
Gimli leapt up next. "And my axe."
Legolas kept the disgust in his eyes, though I thought for a second he was going to swat at the dwarf.
"You carry the fate of us all, little one," Boromir added, standing. "If it is indeed the will of the Council, Gondor will see it through."
"Hey!" Sam cried, scaring the living shit out of everyone. "Mr. Frodo's not goin' anywhere without me."
Elrond's nostrils flared. "No, indeed, it is hardly possible to separate the two of you, even when he is summoned to a secret council and you are not."
Sarcasm! Quite possibly the first time anyone here had been ironic, other than me and Bliss. I found myself grinning.
"Oi! We're coming too!" Merry ran out from his hiding spot with Pippin. "You'd have to send us home tied up in a sack to stop us."
Oh, loyalty. Elrond looked marginally perturbed but never the less allowed them to join the party.
"Anyway, you need people of intelligence on this sort of mission..quest...thing," Pippin said blithely.
Merry muttered lowly, "Well, that rules you out, Pip."
Elrond's patience was starting to wear thin when Bliss stood up, dragging me behind her by my shirt sleeve. "I think we should go too," she announced saucily. The entire Council stared in disbelief.
"I disagree," I clarified, but no one was paying any attention to me.
Gandalf raised an eyebrow at Elrond, while Boromir looked about to revolt. For some reason (probably a suspicion that we were actually supposed to go on the life-threatening journey, whereas I was sure we were there for a learning experience and not supposed to get anything hands-on), it was decided (I'm not sure how, as no one ever actually said anything) that we would be going and Bliss and I took up spots by the gang.
"Eleven companions," Elrond murmured, eying our rather rag-tag group. "So be it. You shall be the Fellowship of the Ring."
Well don't I feel special. We were so going to die.
"Right," Pippin cheered. "Where are we going?"
I sighed. "Death and doom," I muttered. Bliss kicked me.
It was some start.
A/N: Hey special thanks to my few wonderful reviewers: Firebender01, Laura, Laer4572, Zephyr, LM1991, Saeren, Blood Zephyr, Martiny the one and only still, marthafdg. You guys are amazing and although I'm not together enough to reply, I appreciate y'all taking the time. The next few weeks are going to be rather crazy as I have BYBC and am getting my wisdom teeth out and then going to LA to help my sister move, but I'll try to get chapter six up in the next couple days. Thanks for reading, feel free to drop a review.
Cheers!
~Fred