Another long one. Hehe :) I was going to update yesterday, but some stuff happened and that didn't work out. But I'm posting it now! Please review, follow and all that. Thank you all. \\\
Disclaimer: I don't own X-Men/Wolverine etc...
Niki woke up pretty early. She went for a ride on Dodger, helped Sophie teach gym then they went to lunch. The cafeteria was full when they got there. She looked around and saw Logan and Tony. The table they were sitting at was full and Sophie wanted it to just be the two of them anyway.
Logan sniffed the air and smelled her. He turned and gave her a wink. She gave him a small smile and rolled her eyes, sitting down with Sophie. Sophie who had seen the exchange between the two.
"So you and the big bad Wolverine, huh?"
Niki looked at her, confused. "What?"
"Oh, don't play dumb. I saw that."
"What the wink? So what? Men wink at me all the time. They wink at you too."
"Yeah, but you never smile at them... In fact you never really smile much at all."
"Bullshit."
Sophie chose to ignore that and continued her questioning. "What about the other night?"
Niki looked confused. "What about it?"
"When you guys came in and his arm was wrapped around your waist."
She opened her mouth, but didn't have a response for that one, so she shut it again.
Sophie looked satisfied with herself. "Exactly what I thought... So what's going on?"
Niki didn't want to talk about it. She didn't even know what to tell herself about it.
"I don't know... nothing really. We're just... talking. He was in a lab, you know that. Just like me."
"Well he seems a lot like you... Doesn't really say much. Keeps to himself. Seems like he could be kinda violent and he's definitely intimidating."
"You sayin' I'm all those things?"
"And more." Sophie said, matter of factly.
"I'm done talking about this. I've gotta go." Niki got up and started walking out.
Sophie looked at Niki's plate and sighed. "You didn't eat anything." she called after her.
"No shit, Sherlock." Niki called back, but kept walking.
Logan looked over and furrowed his eyebrows. Sophie looked annoyed and Niki was walking away. Even with his enhanced hearing, he couldn't hear what they were saying, they were to far away and there was to much other noise. That is until Sophie yelled that she hadn't eaten anything. He hadn't seen her eat anything since he made her eat two days ago.
After Niki was no longer in sight he turned back to his food, forcing himself to not go after her. Everyone around him was laughing at something, but he paid them no mind, instead his thoughts were all on Niki.
Later that day, Logan was helping Scott and Tony build a new playground for the kids, when Niki came up.
"Hey, Cyke? Tony?" she called.
All the men looked up at her in question. "The professor wants you. You guys got a mission."
"Sweet! That means Gambit and Beast can finish this." Tony said, dropping the hammer.
"See ya, Nik." Tony said, moving past her. "Bye, Wolvie."
"See ya'." Logan said, sitting on a bench and leaning back.
Scott waved at them and headed off.
Niki looked over at Logan, eying him up and down. He was shirtless and sweating, making his skin shine in the sun.
He grinned and winked at her. She again rolled her eyes, but couldn't help but grin.
He noticed she seemed happier during the day. She covered her pain well.
"So, how'd it go with Chuck the other day?" she asked.
He shrugged. "Not too bad, I suppose. He wants Jean to run some tests on me."
"Mmm, that'll be fun." she said, sarcastically.
He made a noncommental grunting noise and she moved over to him, grabbing his hand and pulling him up.
"Come on, I'll get you something to drink. You look a little hot." she said, seductively.
"Only a little?" he asked, leaning forward and whispering in her ear.
She smirked and turned her head towards him, but kept walking.
When they got inside she handed him a glass of sweet ice tea, that he downed in seconds.
There was music playing from somewhere. He watched her as she sang quietly to the music.
"You seem happy during the day." He didn't plan on saying that. At least not out loud and he got nervous about how she would react, but she simply turned her head and gave him a small smile.
"Some days are better than others." She said sadly.
Walking between the raindrops
Riding the aftershock beside you
Hold on and take a breath
I'll be here every step
Walking between the raindrops with you
They heard thunder in the distance and it was getting cloudy outside. She turned and smiled out the window. "It's gonna rain."
She sounded happy about it and her eyes lit up. It made him smile softly at her. This woman confused him beyond belief, but he was enchanted by her. Why, he didn't know.
The rain happened suddenly. There was a crash of thunder and then it started pouring.
********* Logan's POV *********
She turned to me and gave me an excited smile. "C'mere." she said, sounding giddy and holding out her hand.
I almost laughed. Her excitement was contagious.
"Where we goin'?" I asked.
"Outside." she said, leading me to the door.
"It's raining."
"Is that what's falling from the sky?" she said, smiling.
When we got to the door she pulled me into the rain. She lifted her hands in the air and spun around.
"You're crazy!" I yelled over the rain, but even as I did, I was laughing. We were already drenched.
"I thought you already knew that." she yelled back, still smiling. She twirled herself around, lifting her hands to the sky. Her hair was down and flying through the air. She was bare foot, wearing cut off jeans and flowy white tank top, that was now see through and a black bra. I lost my breath as I was once again struck by her.
She stayed like that a moment then looked at me and reached out her hand. "C'mon. Ya scared of havin' a little fun?"
I laughed and ran the short distance to her. I grabbed her around the waist, spinning her. She laughed a real laugh, not a fake or a forced one. And it wasn't a little chuckle, it was a full on belly laugh and it made something in me feel at ease.
I let go of her waist, then grabbed her hand twirling her away from me and then back again, then dunked her slowly. I pulled her back up and lifted her in the air and slowly brought her back down keeping her off the ground so I was holding her against me. She brushed a few stray hairs away from my face and my heart went haywire.
********* Niki's POV *********
He wore a soft smile and he laughed softly. I realized hadn't seen him this relaxed, but I knew was the same.
I leaned foward, but stopped just before I reached her lips and sighed. My heart felt like it was goind to burst through my chest and we were both breathing hard.
"I don't know what to think about you. You confuse the hell outta me." He whispered. "But I really wanna kiss you."
********* Logan's POV *********
"It's just the rain," she said. "It has that effect."
I opened my mouth with a response but Beast opened the door to the mansion. "Are you two crazy?!" he shouted over the rain. "It's pouring out here! Get inside!"
He gave us a strange look and shut the door.
I moved my hand to her hair. "I guess he's right."
She lifted her head to the sky and closed her eyes. She was still flush against me and her hands were on my chest. She seemed calm... Peaceful. I didn't understand it, but I didn't care. I kissed her forehead and she opened her eyes, grinning at me. I rested my head on hers and we stayed there a moment longer before making a move to go inside.
I entwined my fingers with hers and headed towards the door.
********* Third Person *********
Once they were inside he let go of her hand and shook his hair, acting like a dog. She laughed at him and a shiver ran through her. The cold air in the mansion and her soaked clothes weren't a good mix.
His eyes scanned over her body, then flashed yellow. He pushed her against the wall, pressing into her with his body. "God, you're driving me crazy." His voice was a sexy growl that made her want to melt into him.
They both heard and smelled someone coming, but neither made a move away from each other.
Storm and Jubilee walked in, grinning at the two.
"Oh, sorry. Are we interrupting something?" Jubilee asked, innocently.
Logan stepped slowly away from Niki, with a frustrated sigh.
"I'll take that as a yes." Jubilee laughed.
Storm looked at Niki, trying not to smile. "Well we hate to interrupt, but the professor was looking for you."
Niki looked down at herself, then at Logan and tried not to laugh. They were both still soaked from the rain.
"Uh, tell him I'll be there in a few minutes. I'm gonna go change into something dry."
"I'll tell him." Storm walked away, but Jubilee stayed there, watching them with a grin.
Niki looked at her, but it was obvious Jubilee had no intentions of leaving. She looked at Logan.
"...Okay, um... I'll see ya later, big guy." she grinned at him, and walked away.
He grinned back, his eyes still slightly yellow. "See ya, darlin."
When she was gone he shut his eyes tight. When he opened them, they were completely brown again. Jubilee was still there, looking at him.
He raised an eyebrow at her. "What?"
"Nothing, it's just... You guys are cute." she said, grinning.
"Listen kid, I ain't cute."
Her grin didn't falter. "If you say so."
His brows furrowed together and he looked at her strangely. "I need a drink." and with that he was gone.
Niki walked in Xavier's office.
"Ah, there you are Nikita." he said, coming out from behind his desk.
"Professor."
"I was wondering when you planned on leaving us. Last I heard you were to leave today."
"Yeah, I was thinking maybe I'd stick around a while longer. Maybe teach some more classes. Help out some."
"As happy as we are to have you here, may I ask what has inspired this extended stay?"
She sat down and sighed. Xavier waited patiently for an answer. Finally she shrugged and shook her head. "No where else to be right now."
It was a lame reason but Xavier didn't question it.
Xavier could tell it was something, but she was obviously not willing to share it. "Well you are welcome to stay as long as you'd like, Nikita. That is all."
"Thanks, professor."
Tony and Scott had gotten back late, had a few drinks with Logan, then they all went upstairs to their rooms.
Niki once again hadn't been at dinner. She went upstairs and showered, hoping the sound of the rain would help her fall asleep better tonight.
Sure enough it did. She lied there listening to the the soft thunder and the rain, falling asleep within less than an hour.
Logan was still awake, listening to the rain. He sat up and lit a cigar, taking a long draw. He ran a hand through his hair and sighed. Once he finished his cigar he plopped back down on his bed. Eventually he fell asleep only to woken up by an ear piercing scream. He shot straight up, claws shooting out. When he realized there was no danger in his room, he walked out to the hallway. Tony was walking towards Niki's door with a tired expression.
"What the hell was that?!" Logan asked. His claws were still out and he was on high alert.
"It's Niki. She has nightmares."
Logan looked confused. "What are you doing?"
"Waking her up."
"Wait!" Logan stopped him just before he opened her door. "I mean... I'll do it."
Tony didn't look to sure about that idea. "I don't know if tha-"
"Trust me... Nightmares aren't exactly a foreign matter to me."
Tony looked at him a moment longer. He didn't know if he should let him. "I gotta warn you man-"
"You don't have to. I'll be careful."
Tony nodded and backed away, returning to his room.
You've been waiting a long time
To fall down on your knees
Cut your hands
Cut yourself until you bleed
But fall asleep next to me
********* Logan's POV *********
I retracted my claws and walked in her room. My heart was beating fast and I wasn't entirely sure what my plan of action was.
"Niki?" I whispered.
She was tangled in her sheets, sweating and curled into herself.
I made my way to the bed and sat down on the side of it. "Nik? Come on, darlin. Wake up."
I knew she would attack, so I was prepared for it the second she woke up.
I reached out to touch her shoulder and she shot up with a high pitched growl, claws shooting out. She moved fast, but I was faster and stronger, anticipating her movements. I caught her wrists and managed to just keep her claws from piercing my chest. Her breaths were fast and her eyes were purple.
"You're okay, darlin. It's me... You're okay." I kept my voice as steady as I could.
She seemed to relax slightly at my voice, but looked confused and didn't meet my eyes.
I let go of her wrists and put one of my hands in her hair. "Look at me, darlin."
Her eyes met mine and I lost my breath, forgetting what I was going to say. Damn, that keeps happening. Her eyes were a vibrant purple and they were beautiful. Troubled and dark yes, but beautiful. It made Wolverine want to break to the surface and take her. I was fightin' the urge myself.
I struggled with myself for a minute, then finally found my words again. "It was just a nightmare. It's over."
"It's not." she shook her head. "... they come back all the time."
"They're not here, darlin. No one's gonna hurt you."
"No, you don't understand! They won't stop!" she shook her head desperate for me to understand. She was shaking now, but she had retracted her claws and was now gripping my arms tightly, as if she was trying to ground herself.
I wish I could ground her, make it okay, but I don't know if I can. Her eyes had tears in them and it made my heart ache. I'm still shocked at how this woman can effect me.
"Niki, listen to me." I said, firmly.
She looked at me confused and I continued. "You're okay... You're safe now. No one here is gonna hurt you."
"You don't know that." she looked panicked and it made me worry.
"I do." I said, calmly. "And look around, darlin. Right now, it's just you and me in this room... and I'm not gonna hurt you."
She still looked scared and her eyes scanned around the room like she was looking for them, whoever 'they' might be.
This wasn't working. She backed away from me, closed her eyes tight and her claws shot out. Well that wasn't a good sign.
"I need you to leave." she said.
"Niki, listen to me." I said again, trying to keep her attention.
"No," she said, opening her eyes. "You need to leave." she said, firmly.
"Why?" I asked, having no intention of leaving.
"Please," she said, her voice growing small. "Please leave. I don't want to do this with you here-" she cut off quickly and her eyes grew big.
I don't think she realized what she had said until after she said it. Now she knew I wouldn't let her get by without an explanation. I had a bad feeling I knew what she was talking about. She wanted to hurt herself. She wanted to feel the pain, to have it ground her, bring her back to reality. But I didn't want her to.
"Do what?" I asked, sadly.
"Don't make me do this in front of you, big guy."
"Don't do this to yourself, darlin. It won't solve anything."
She was shaking. I knew she was going to, whether I was here or not.
"I have to." she said with tears in her eyes. "I have to center myself."
I thought I was gonna have a heart attack as she sunk her claws into her arm and ran ran them down to her wrists. I almost ran over to her to stop her, but I couldn't move. It wouldn't have done any good. She would've done it anyway. Now or later.
She started to sink down and I did run over. I caught her and lowered her slowly to the ground, pulling her onto my lap and leaning against the bed.
It of course healed fast, but it was to slow for my liking. I was shaking from seeing it. It scared the hell outta me. I watched the blood run down her arm and the anxiety in my chest was killing me.
I tried to even out my breaths and focus on the feeling of her in my arms. She was okay. She healed, she's breathing. And she's now clinging onto me tightly.
I pulled her as close to me as I could and whispered in her ear. "No one's here. It's just you and me, darlin. No one's gonna hurt you, alright... I won't let 'em."
And I won't. They'd have to get through me first... And Wolverine. Ha. I'd like to see that.
She looked at me, searching my face. She looked like she was trying decide if she could believe me.
"Promise?" she whispered, shakily.
My heart stopped momentarily, before I answered with a certainty I hadn't ever felt before. "I promise."
She closed her eyes and held onto me even tighter. I kissed the top of her head. "You're okay, darlin. Calm down."
She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Her shaking slowly stopped as I rocked her slowly. I have no idea how long we stayed like that, but it was a while.
********* Third Person *********
"I'm sorry." she whispered and looked up at him. Her eyes were back to dark brown. "I lost control."
"Ahh, that's alright."
"No, it isn't. I- I shouldn't have done that with you in here. You didn't have to see that-"
"Hey," he said, softly cutting her off. "You know they're gone, right?"
"I do... but she doesn't." She said, referring to Nikita.
He swallowed, not knowing if he should ask the question he was about to. "What'd they do to you?" he whispered.
She shook her head. "Nothing, I jus-"
"Don't." he said, cutting her off. "Don't do that."
"Do what?"
"Lie to me."
She sighed and whispered. "You're not gonna let me get away with anything are ya'?"
He pretended to think about it for a minute then shook his head. "No... I just watched you sink your claws into your own arm. I'm not lettin' that go."
She looked sad. "You really wanna know?"
"I really do." he whispered.
"I... Not tonight. Tonight I just want to go to sleep... I'm tired." and she sounded like it. Her voice sounded defeated and tired. He wasn't about to push her about it. Not tonight.
He sighed, and nodded. "Want me to stay?" his voice was rough, yet gentle at the same time. It also sounded like he had already made the decision for her.
He didn't plan on leaving, even if she wanted him to. Whether she wanted to admit it or not, he knew she was scared. He wasn't going to leave her alone like that. Wolverine wouldn't let him leave her alone like that.
"I'm fine. I just need to fall back aslee-"
"Let me rephrase." He said cutting her off. "I'm staying."
"No," she started. "Really I'm fine. I don't need-"
"Well I do. So humor me."
He grabbed a t-shirt on the ground and gently wiped the blood off her arm. She watched him and tears formed in her eyes at his soft touch. She wasn't used to this.
He picked her up and got in the bed. He was on his back and his arm was around her. She curled into him and put her head on his chest, thankful he hadn't really given her a choice on whether he stayed or not.
********* Niki's POV *********
I didn't understand. I didn't understand why he was doing this or why I couldn't seem to refuse or stop him. I just can't seem to. But now that I'm here in his arms, I can't see why I would want to be anywhere else. It's not like I can make him leave. I don't want him to leave.
But it does scare me. The last time I trusted a man I ended up in a mutant lab. Although right now I can't seem to make myself care. I just don't want him to let me go... Because like always, I can feel myself falling... But this time it feels like he's catching me.
He ran his hand through my hair and sighed. "Promise we'll talk about it?" he asked.
I thought about it for a second then responded. "Only if you promise you won't let me go... Just for tonight?" my voice shook.
It wasn't an easy thing for me to ask for, but I was over it right now. And when he held me, I felt sheltered and safe. And that was something I hadn't felt in a very long time.
********* Logan's POV *********
I turned on my side so I was facing her. Our faces were inches from each other. The Wolverine was fighting me again, especially at her request. Of course I wouldn't fucking let her go and nothing could make me. I wasn't leaving this room even if she wanted me to. I didn't want to let her go, I wanted to keep her safe in my arms.
"I promise I won't let you go."
********* Third Person *********
And there was more packed behind that statement then either of them realized.
"Then I promise we'll talk about it."
He gave her a small smile and she returned it. Then she turned her back towards him and he put an arm around her waist and pulled her so she was against him. He traced slow circles on her hip with his fingertips, and her breathing slowed. Minutes passed and he thought she was alseep when he heard her whisper.
"Can I ask you a question?"
"Course, darlin."
"What's your name? Your real name?"
At first he didn't answer and she began to think he wasn't going to, when he finally spoke.
"Logan." his voice was quiet but strong.
"Logan." she repeated.
He almost shivered when she said it. It had been so long since he'd heard his own name from someone else's mouth.
"It fits you." she said.
They grew quiet for a few minutes, then Logan's voice broke the silence. "Niki?"
"Hmm?" she replied sleepily.
"Can you do somethin' for me?... When it's just us... will you call me Logan."
She opened her eyes, looking into the dark and smiled. "Yeah," she whispered. "I will."
He smiled and nuzzled her hair taking a deep breath.
"Logan?" her voice was quiet and unsure.
"Yeah, darlin?"
There were so many things she wanted to say, but didn't know how. In all actuality she was scared and she didn't even know what she was scared of. She knew it was just a nightmare, but the memories that brought them felt more real to her now then when it was actually happening.
She fought back tears and pulled his arm up to her chest, holding it to her tight. He could tell whatever she was going to say, she had changed her mind and wasn't going to say it. He squeezed her hand gently and kissed the back of her head, burying his face in her hair.
"It's alright, baby. Don't worry about it... not tonight."
She took one last shaky breath and relaxed into him. "Night, Logan."
"Night, darlin."
She fell asleep quickly. He watched her for a while, running his hands through her hair and eventually her breaths led him to his own sleep.