Disclaimer: None of these characters are mine. I own nothing. Absolutely nothing. Depressing, isn't it? But yeah. Not mine… even Clock King. He's for real, look it up. :D

You're My Wonderwall

"Life is one grand, sweet song, so start the music." –Ronald Reagan

In fact, we were not being called to attention against a petty criminal, or at least anything remotely "minor league". My meditation had been broken for fairly good reason; we had a new villain, apparently. Some asshole had just missed the big invitations to join the Brotherhood of Evil (and subsequently become a statue of ice), but I'd never seen him around, so maybe he wasn't that big of a deal anyway. Or maybe he was on the east coast most of the time, who knew?

He went by "Clock King". All of these guys had their own little megalomaniac egos to fulfill their narcissism quotas and fetishes/obsessions to make themselves into bigger criminals with bigger characterizations and even bigger heads (and cute, color-coded, matching outfits, too!), and our buddy here was no different. Of course, it was a clock motif: brown three-piece suit (covered with clocks); brown bowler hat (decorated with clocks); a pocket watch (of course); glasses (that looked like clock faces stuck at 3 o'clock); and cane that looked like (you guessed it) a clock hand. Real cute.

As of present, he was holding "Gali's Watch Emporium" hostage. He was leaning on the cane, wielding nothing else but a bag of… well, I didn't know what was in it, but I imagined it was a plethora of watches. Or money. Or both. God, villains and their idiosyncrasies. Anyway, we arrived openly wielding our weapons/natural abilities and ready for combat, and he still remained leaning on his stupid clock-hand cane, smiling toothily.

"Right on time, Titans!" he laughed, swinging his cane like Willy Wonka. Was he a pun criminal? I swore to God then and there that if he carried on with that goddamn "time" routine, I'd personally punch his teeth (and then his lights) out. "You know, I woke up this morning, and I said, 'My, Clock King, it's been such a rather loooong time since you've had a worthy foe to go against. Time is ripe… but only for so long. You can't wait until the ship has sailed to actively pursue nemeses'."

Beast Boy had landed next to me, and under his breath he remarked, "I want to punch him in the throat."

"I have dibs on those pearly-whites. We can double-team him," I replied. Beast Boy nodded gravely, and I could see he was suppressing a laugh.

"And then Mr. Gali! Why, I walked by his display case not two days ago, and I saw these marvelous watches, these masterpieces of portable clocks, and I wondered, 'How long is their shelf life?' I knew that these little fortunes couldn't be wasted and lose the test of time. So I decided to steal them. And so far, everything has been running perfectly on schedule. I never lose track of time, even when I'm in my natural element, you know; my monologue was just around the corner, and I couldn't possibly be late to entertain my new audience. Thus, I stand before you. Would you like to see if a villain can win against you once in a blue moon? Because, quite honestly my dear Titans… I'm counting on it."

All of this was said with that never-ceasing grin, plastered onto his face (seemingly) with super-glue, and the puns were filling the air more noxiously than any gas-leaking or oil-spilling company could ever hope to plausibly match in pollution. Seems extreme, but believe me, in real life it's annoying as hell just to listen to this guy say two words. And why hadn't we attacked yet? Nothing was barring us from attacking him… I think all of us were slightly entertained by how goofy he was, really. It'd been a while since we'd had anyone as ridiculous as this making a special appearance in town. Looking back on it, he's campy enough to be out of some really bad sixties television show… maybe even one about superheroes, as, like, a one-episode enemy, never seen again on primetime because he just wasn't that memorable. Yeah! That fits him perfectly.

Apparently Robin had been roused from his own trance to suddenly whip out his staff and yell out (with the hint of an amused smile playing across his lips), "TITANS! MOVE!"

I think you can pretty much tell what happened next.

We beat the living shit out of him.

At first, he did fairly well (some cops we talked to said he was moaning about how hard he'd studied our fight patterns and combat tactics while they were throwing him into his brand new jail cell). Parried a few a jabs, dodged some projectiles… he even made a nice sword-show with his stylized cane, I'm happy to say. But then Starfire and Robin pulled this new move they'd never done before that involved her green lasers mixed in with Robin's taekwondo (it was pretty sick), and Cyborg shot off a massive beam to compliment it. It really knocked the guy back; before he knew it, Raven and I were on him. We'd each promised to assault "Clock King" previously, and it definitely wasn't that serious; just a little roughing up, maybe some bruises and a possibly damaged ego. But it was cool, because we were really in sync with each other.

Okay, it doesn't sound that cool written down, I know; still, in the moment, I think we were both still feeling the afterglow of last night's make-out session, and we looked really synchronized in action. It was like BAM, I'd hit him, and BOOM, she'd throw her orbs at him, and BANG, I'd attack somehow in a different animal form, and THUD, she'd knock him away… it was the dance of violence and affection, if that doesn't sound strange enough. When we were finished and the "Clock King" was moaning safely from the ground (he was wailing "After the fact!" over and over again for whatever reason), the two of us turned around to find that our other three friends were enraptured by our little "performance". Robin and Starfire seemed to be embarrassed caught so obviously observing, but Cyborg grinned cheekily before turning away to focus on the incoming police. Was I going to get shit for it later? Sure. But I had something else to talk about, as well, and I knew he would be shocked to find out I'd been getting a little loving (shut up, I know it sounds dirty) the other night.

Of course, this incident doesn't really seem important, other than to function as another slightly romantic encounter between Rae and I… but there was another thing, too. We'd done it before, away from our friends' wandering eyes, safe in the privacy of the night or at least solitariness (that doesn't sound right, but it's a real word, believe me)—it was such a minor thing too, really nothing compared to kissing—but I reached for her hand, as the cop cars came to a slowing halt in front of the crime-scene… and you know, I think I was expecting a little bit for her to reject me. Not harshly, not spitefully, but she would move her hand away and give me a look and then we would take about "space" or something like that later. I was preparing for it, even.

But she surprised me. She took it eagerly, even chancing a hidden smile when she was sure no one was watching. I would be lying if I didn't say it lit up my day, to be honest (and I didn't really care when people gave us those funny looks young couples always get, all knowing and nostalgic). So there was some point to this asshole challenging us to a fight, at least; our relationship was kind of validated. It was exciting for me, what can I say?

Also, a clip of dialogue we overheard between Robin and Starfire:

R: "We were there on the drop of a hat, huh?"

S: "Where were the droppings of hats, Robin? I did not see them."

R: "I don't think you took that the right way. Uh… he was a day late and a dollar short on running away?"

S: "Friend Robin, this is not the day of tomorrow, nor is anyone in possession of a small dollar bill. You all right, yes?"

R: "Uh… yeah."

Here, both of us thought he would give up (understandably), but apparently, he wasn't quite done with his joking mood.

R: "Never in a million years will the Clock King get out of serving hard time!" (We think this was accompanied by an enthusiastic smile, encouraging any possible laughter)

S: "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Friend Robin, you have made a funny! Look, here approaches the King of the Clocks himself! Hahahahaha! He is what we call on Tamaran a "blarfarginuten"!"

You know someone's in love when they're laughing at a joke they don't get at all. If that wasn't love, than I didn't know what was.

Robin laughed too, rubbing his neck contentedly at having "made a funny". Shhh, don't tell anybody I told you, but a little later on I heard noises coming from Robin's bedroom. There was a lot of laughing then (real laughing), and also some moaning. My mind refuses to connect the dots in fear of making me throw up, but I think you can figure it out for yourselves. You can? Good. Tell me later, when I'm not as nauseous.

Yeah, it happened.

I know this because I was told about it. I didn't ask for it, not at all; it was so completely and wholly uncalled for, and yet I found myself unable to escape the situation. My first mistake was to be sitting in the common room yet again (like I'd said before, I needed to be outside a lot more); my second mistake was probably being open with Beast Boy earlier (although it'd felt really damn good to let loose like that in front of everybody else); and my third mistake was making eye contact. I looked up for a moment, watching Star raiding the fridge absent-mindedly, and before I could revert back into my book, before it could seem like I'd never even noticed her, she glanced over my way. Instantly, the smile I'd been expecting appeared on her face, and she practically teleported next to me on the couch.

With a sigh, I put down my book (Speak by Laurie Halse Anderson, great frigging book) and turned towards the clueless invader of my privacy. She seemed exuberant. I figured I was in for a ride.

"Hello, friend Raven! It has been long indeed since we last spoke. How are you?"

"I'm fine."

"This is good, friend Raven! This is mayhap due to the events that occurred the night before, yes?"

I froze in place. "How do you know about that?"

"Friend Robin told me not an hour passed before about your amorous encounter with Beast Boy. Why? I was not meant to know this?"

"Uh… kinda not, actually." He'd told Robin? Robin? Okay, Cyborg was more or less anticipated in that situation, but Robin? Why? For what reason? I couldn't tell if I was pissed off or intrigued.

"Oh. Well, as it is said often on Tamaran, 'a gronklefizz cannot ever be detained once it has been released'."

"…Sure." Where was she going to go with this? I prayed like I'd never prayed before that the conversation would just end awkwardly there and leave me only mildly peeved.

"I am very convinced that you are in knowledge of mine and Robin's numerous amorous encounters, yes?"

Oh shit. "Yeah… um, Star, could you—?"

"Friend Beast Boy touches your squishie parts as well when tongues have their dance, or these are only the actions of Robin?"

Should I have just left it all alone there? Should I have dropped all talk and frankly ran away? Well, hell, she was reaching out, but damn, I never would've thought I could be faced with something so boldly uncomfortable.

"Yeah. Lots of boys tend to want to do that when you kiss, Star; it just matters whether you want him to or not."

"Ohhhh. I did not know, as Robin has been my only companion, but it is in a comforting nature to find that we are not alone. I suppose you feel for Beast Boy as do I for Robin, hm?"

"I… I think so, actually. Wow. That sounds weird out in the open like that… but yes. I like him like that, Star."

"He makes your heart warm, does he not?" she said (rather knowingly too, I might add). Maybe she couldn't make a sentence for her life, but the girl knew more than I did about her own emotions. I think it had something to do with the fact that she functioned by expressing hers, whereas I survived by fighting mine into submission, but that's a silly thought, isn't it?

"Yes." Succinct, to the point, and totally sincere.

"It is most definitely a nice feeling."

"You've got that right," I replied quietly. The two of us sat still for a few moments, and I thought maybe it hadn't ended so badly; maybe girl talks could be a good thing (in moderation), especially since it was only the two of us. We were close already, sure, but a little bit of dread chilled my blood whenever she approached me about something woman-related, like, say, her period (things get really weird when you're an alien, apparently) or her boob-size (God, that conversation will remain in my mind for the rest of my life). Maybe it wasn't that bad after all. And then she said this:

"You and Beast Boy have been to the bed together? Robin and I have been many times in the bed together by now."

Oh God.

"We're… we're not that far, um, in our relationship… right now… maybe someday, but not right now, no, we don't do that."

"Oh, but friend Raven, you are lacking an experience most wonderful!" she breathed, leaning back into the couch contentedly. On the outside, I showed a small smile, but on the inside I was cursing to the point that a nun would have started to sob noisily as she held her hands to her ears and prayed on her knees for salvation (dramatic, yes, but very true).

"I don't doubt that, actually."

"Why, earlier this day, Robin and I went to bed together; Raven, you will not trust in how sweet he is under the covers, and you do not know that when you—"

"UHHH I think I heard somebody call my name I think Cyborg needs me in his garage or something or on the roof or something I don't know but I have to go so I'll be seeing around okay we'll talk later see you Star bye!"

I ran for my life.

We ran into each other in the gym. I was there, docking in so that Robin wouldn't be on my back about the lack of exercise (remember that fun little bit of our conversation?); she ran in, glancing wildly over her shoulder for an invisible pursuer, and came to a heavy-breathing stop by the dumbbells. With a sigh of relief, I let the treadmill slow to a stop, and I jogged over to her side (might I add I was also heavily breathing). Both of us took a moment or two before we could actually speak.

"Something (huff huff huff) scare you?" I said.

"Girl (huff huff) talk," she said.

"Do I (huff huff huff) want to know?" I replied.

"Nah. (Huff huff) Did you tell Robin (huff huff) about last night?"

"I had to (huff huff huff) get him off (huff huff) my back."

"Oh (huff huff)."

"Are you (huff huff) mad?"

"Not (huff) really, actually."

"I'm still (huff) sorry."

"Don't worry (huff) about it. Want to work out (huff) together? I think I actually want to (huff) right now."

"Uh… sure, why not? (Huff) You got iPod authority."

"Okay."

So she put on Oasis. Not exactly my choice for getting pumped up, but, then again, I hadn't been exercising by choice until she'd arrived. It wasn't romantic by nature, of course (it was an activity involving sweat, physical exertion, and grunting, but not in THAT way)… and yet, we kind of made it like that. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't checking her out, thinking to myself, Wow, I had my hands all over that just the other day. I swear to God I saw her returning the favor, but even if she wasn't, it was fine.

Everything was pretty much fine.

I don't know if she paid much attention to it, but both of us took a break at one point (to drink some water and that kind of thing), and in the background Wonderwall was playing. You probably know the song, it's one of Oasis's biggest hits; we were at the chorus, where it's like "Because maaaaybe… you're gonna be the one that saves meeeeee… and after allllllllll… you're my wonderwallllllllllll…", and I just sort of looked at her… her cape was off, hung on the wall by a hook… and even sweaty like that, even flushed with heat… in that leotard, with those curves, and that face… man, she was my wonderwall. She was my wonderwall.