"None of these really fit." Cato walked out of the back room, an apron clinging to him tightly.
"You're such a big boy!" My mom basically swooned at his entrance. His shirt was still tight in her grasp, her eyes seeming to glaze over. "We're not used to having someone as built as you behind the scenes. Those will have to do for now until we get you some new ones. Come along, I'll show you kitchen and recipes."
I spun around and mouthed an apology to Cato as he walked past. "Get back to work, you should have finished those cakes an hour ago."
"Yes, mom." I forced myself to answer. Disagreeing with her would only cause more problems for both me and Cato. I grabbed my spatula and tried to salvage the mess I created the best I could. Who really gave a fuck anyway, it was a cake for a 5-year-old's birthday. Someone's face would probably get smashed into it before the party even started.
"This is the mixer. It's industrial sized so we can make more dough. Be careful though, it spins pretty fast and could break an arm easily." My mom's thunderous voice carried through the store.
"I'll keep that in mind." Cato's voice hesitant. I peeked around the corner and caught him awkwardly standing in front of the appliance.
"Oh, Cato! You're so funny!" My mom cackled putting her hand on his forearm. Stupid bitch, get your hands off him. Cato's forced chuckle pulled a smile from my lips. My mom had no idea how uncomfortable she was making him.
Most of the frosting was off, all that was left was to smooth it out. Sighing, I switched tools and quickly erased any evidence. Stepping back, I was happy with the ending results. To bad the little fuck that was getting it wouldn't give two shits.
"This is the kneading station, make sure when you start this there is enough flour on the table or the dough will stick." My mom bellowed. Sneaking around the corner and tried my best to spy without being noticed. Both had their backs facing me, making it easier to remain hidden. I wouldn't have had it any other way either, Cato was showing off his better side.
"Gotcha, flour is good." Cato answered. Flour is good, now strip down and roll around in it like in my dreams. Let me knead you until I think you're ready for my oven.
"You're such a quick learner!" My mom's cackling voice made me want to punch her. I've always wanted to punch her, but now she's trying to take Cato away from me. A son should never have to battle their mother over a man. This isn't Playmutts or whatever that shit was.
"Uhh… So far I've learned that flour is good, aprons are small, and I have to resist the temptation to stick my arm in a giant rapidly spinning blender. Not sure if I can handle much more at this steadily increasing learning pace." Cato added sarcastically and my mom only giggled. His little quip at her got a laugh from me. Quickly jumping behind the counter, I ducked under the register.
"Uhm? Everything alright down there?"
"Huh?" I climbed out from under the register and quickly glanced behind me. Pretty sure no one noticed. Except this douche. "What?"
It came out a little harsher than I wanted and the guy looked a little offended by it. "Here to pick up a cake, unless you've got something better to do."
"Sorry, what was your name?" I asked trying to avoid eye contact by looking over the call-in list to verify.
"Undersee." Oh, the little assholes birthday cake. Wasn't expecting him until later.
"Okay, It'll be $26.56 total. I'll run and grab it for you." Walking to the back, I prepped the cake impatiently. What the hell was my mom doing to Cato while this asshole was bothering me? The kids 5, in four days he won't even remember he had a bloody cake.
Packing the cake, I returned to the counter. The man already had out $30 for me. Sliding the cake across the counter, I grabbed the money and threw it in the register. I turned my head, vaguely counting the change back but listening for my mom's voice.
Handing him his change, he grabbed the cake and added. "Service with a smile. You should try it, you little shit."
Good riddance. I have other things to do. Peeking around the corner, I spotted the two of them at the far end by the ovens.
"Everything has a different temperature needed to bake." No shit, mom. He's not like that idiot 5 year old. "There's a handy-dandy poster on the wall that tells you what temperature each thing we bake needs to be at. Make sure it's exactly that temperature and fully preheated before you stick 'em in."
Cato looked absolutely bored with my mom. He just nodded, probably figured it was easier not to say anything and just let her get it out of her system.
"Peeta? What are you doing?"
"Shit… Hey dad." I stood straight up again, trying to play off that I wasn't creeping. My dad quirked an eyebrow and shook his head at me.
"Is anyone in this family normal?" He muttered dropping the bag he was holding on the counter. "Your mom in the back?"
"Yeah, she's training Cato right now." I answered grabbing the bag and walking towards the pantry.
"That explains the creepy watching you were doing." My dad scratched his head. "Why is she training him? Figured you'd do a better job at that than she would."
"Yeah well, it isn't pretty back there. Think mom is going to scare him away." I answered pulling out the supplies and stocking them neatly. "Ran out of Vanilla?"
"Yeah, shipment hasn't come yet. Getting low on a bunch of stuff. One reason why I need to talk to your mom. She probably forgot to do inventory and didn't bother to call anything in."
"Cato could probably use a break from her, too." I answered folding the bag and setting it on the counter.
"Poor guy." My dad answered walking into the kitchen.
Both my mom and dad walked into the office and shut the door. Cato slowly walked up behind me. "Kid, isn't your mom married? What is her deal? If she touches me one more time, I'm gonna file harassment."
"Sorry about that, although it was kind of entertaining to see you squirm." I laughed.
"Ha ha. Can you cover for me? After having my intelligence insulted beyond anything I've ever endured before, I'm in desperate need of a cig."
"Go for it, think they'll be a while anyway." I answered. He nodded and walked outside. I grabbed a broom and started to sweep behind the counter to keep myself busy.
I heard the bell on the door ring. "That was fast." I mumbled still sweeping.
"Bitch, I do everything fast." Katniss answered.
"Kat? Sorry, thought you were Cato." I set the broom against the wall and leaned against the counter. "What are you doing here anyway?"
"Lunch break, figured I'd come down and see how everything's going on the first day. Plus, I don't think Haymitch will even notice I'm gone, so I've got time."
"Interesting, I barely got to talk to him, my mom homed in on him. She's been hitting on him since the second he walked in."
"That's fucking creepy." Katniss answered, leaning against the opposite side of the counter. "Oh, were you expecting me? Got the paper bag ready and everything! Peeta, you shouldn't have!"
I felt myself blush at the thought. "Dammit, Kat! That's not what it's for. Quit trying to screw me!"
"Oh, I've got something better…" She dug into her purse with a devilish smile. Fucking Christ, this isn't going to end well for me. "You can screw yourself!"
She pulled out a massive red dildo and slammed it on the counter. I stared at it, horrified, watching it wobble back and forth. "I like to call it Clifford the Big Red Dildo. After your little stunt this morning, figured its about time you got one."
"Kat! What the… Put that away! Fuck! We're out in the open right now!" I stammered over my words, eyes still transfixed on the silicon beast before me.
"Quit being a prude. It's time you've upgraded. Get a bit of practice. That Cato bitch looks like he's packin'." Katniss sneered. "That's not all I got either. I don't know how I didn't see this earlier. I think you're kinky enough for this shit."
Digging through her purse, she pulled out something's tail. She gripped it tightly and swiftly smacked it on the counter causing me to cringe. "Mistress Katniss demands you on your knees. Eat my pussy like you actually like it, slut!"
"What the fuck makes you think I'd be into this?" I growled through gritted teeth. "And why is my sex life so fucking important to you? I thought you hated Cato."
"Yeah well, he's gonna be pounding that sweet ass sometime soon. Speaking of which, here's some condoms, keep yourself clean."
On top of the giant cock still flopping from side to side on the counter and the makeshift whip, magnum sized condoms suddenly appeared next to them. "Always stay prepared. You get Syphilis, I will kill you."
I was completely dumbfounded. So many insults were running through my mind and nothing was connecting with my mouth leaving me silent.
"I'm back, thanks for the break Peeta. I really needed—"
Fuck! I don't know what scares me more right now, the giant dildo sitting on the counter in plain view or the fact that Cato is standing there silently staring right at it.
"Is that a… Uhm… Peeta? What the hell is going on?" Cato asked.
Katniss sneered at me, turning on her heels to face Cato. "Yes, yes it is Clifford the Big Red Dildo. Impressive isn't it?"
"Uh, Kat just wanted to show me this for some unknown reason. She's kind of insane." I mumbled.
"That's just unnatural. How big is that thing?" Cato asked completely transfixed.
"12 inches. Only the best for my besty." Katniss answered with a smile. Shit. Think quick.
"…Which is what she calls her pussy." I answered trying to play it off before whispering. "Besty… Yeah."
"No I don't. My little girl's name is Victoria, because she's such a little slut." Katniss retorted. I wanted to bash my head repeatedly into the wall. Why are you doing this to me, Kat?
"Damn Kat. You're more of a freak than I thought." Cato answered. "I mean, totally in a good way… I think."
I kept switching my gaze from Big Red to Cato who looked completely confused, mouth slightly open, uncomfortable by the whole situation. I felt his pain.
"I, uhh, need another smoke break." Cato suddenly stated turning on his heels and damn near ran out the front door.
"Get this shit out of here! What the fuck is wrong with you?" I shouted at Kat. I've gone from completely uncomfortable to ape shit mad and if she didn't get this crap out of my face soon I was gonna shove Clifford down her damn throat.
"What?" Katniss asked, "It's not like he's never seen a dildo before. He's probably got at least 8 in his apartment."
"He's straight, Kat!" I shouted. "And I don't want you parading around with a fucking rainbow attached to your forehead! I'd like to keep that part hidden from him. I don't want shit to get awkward."
"Don't be delusional. That boy probably gets more dick than a glory hole. I think someone needs a little time out." She mumbled. "Maybe you should take a few minutes and give 'ole Cliffy here a good break-in."
"I fucking…" I couldn't formulate words again, my anger burning through me like lava. "I fucking can't with you today. Take your shit and leave."
"Cranky." Katniss answered grabbing the condoms and the whip and shoving them in her purse. "Fine, I'll get out of your hair and let you live your lie. But I'm leaving the dildo, you'll thank me later."
She left the store, the giant rubber penis still sitting on the counter. I fumed at the thought of having to touch it, but I was left with little choice now. I had to get it out of plain view. Opening the paper bag, I slipped it over the monstrosity and pulled it off the counter without having to touch it. Quickly running up to my room, I threw the bag under my desk and deal with it later. There wasn't any way to dispose of it at the moment, I'd have to wait until later.
Walking back downstairs, I noticed Cato behind the counter. "She's very uhm… Eccentric."
"You have no idea." I grumbled joining him behind the counter. "She's loosing more and more of her mind every damn day. That's something you can't unsee."
"Agreed…" Cato mumbled. "No matter how hard I try, that's stuck. How does she even plan on using that thing? She practicing for child birth?"
"Dear God, can we not talk about it…" I wanted to focus on something else, try to flush the image away the best I could. "Lemme teach you the register. Obviously, great the customer when they come in. The register automatically adds tax, just press the correct buttons and it'll tally. To complete, hit send and the register will open. The change will automatically show up so you don't have to think to much about it."
"Sounds easy enough." Cato answered trying just as hard as me to involve ourselves in something that didn't wiggle all over. Fortunately, a customer entered. Unfortunately, they wiggled all over the place, too. Pretty sure I'm going to vomit all over the place by the end of this shift.
"I'll let you take this one, jump right in there; I'll help if you need me."
"Sure." Cato answered. He didn't look to confident, but it was his first time. "Hi, Welcome to The Buttered Muffin. Do you need any help finding anything?"
I gave him the thumbs up, he was doing fine all on his own. The customer turned towards Cato and gave him a strange look. "Uhh, yeah. I'm looking for bread."
"Sure, we have a list of our breads right here. I can read them to you if you want." I forgot that Cato worked with people before. As Clove, he's probably had more practice helping people. Instead of taking his clothes off, he's selling bread.
"Yes, please."
"Whole Wheat, White, Rye, Potato, Sourdough, Cinnamon Raisin, Pumpkin, Banana… Any of those what you're looking for?" Cato asked setting the menu back down on the counter.
"Uhm… Bread." The customer looked completely confused.
"Yes, but what kind would you like?" Cato asked. I could tell he was starting to lose his patience.
"One for good sandwiches."
"Oh, fantastic. That only gets rid of none of them." Cato sarcastically answered. I stepped in putting my hand on his shoulder.
"Calm down. I'll take it from here." I answered and stepped forward. "Looking for sandwich bread? What kind of sandwiches? I can recommend a few such as whole wheat, white, rye, and one of our special honey breads. All of which taste good with ham."
"I don't eat ham."
"Oh, okay… Well, even with turkey, or anything really. I'd suggest our honey loaf. It's a bit more expensive but it's worth it." I tried to explain but he didn't seem to be listening.
"I don't like honey."
"Well maybe whole wheat?"
"Possibly."
"For the love of god! It's bread! It's not like you're buying a damn car!" Cato snapped. "Here, Have some wheat bread, you could use a little whole grain in your diet."
"Cato!" I jumped in and gently pushed him away from the counter. "You can't talk to the customer like that. I'm sorry sir, here, have this on the house. I completely apologize on his behalf."
The customer groaned as I handed the loaf of bread to him and turned to leave. "What the hell was that? I figured you were smart enough not you yell at the customer."
"Sorry, the guy was irritating me and I'm on edge over the fresh images of ruler dick."
Doubling over, I couldn't help but laugh at the situation. Cato gets hit on by my mom, his first customer is one of those indecisive ones and on top of it all, he still had to stare at penis despite not being a stripper anymore.
"Worst first day I've ever had." Cato mumbled, "And it's not funny."
"It kind of is in a completely scarring way." I tried to regain my composure, still chuckling. "Take it you'll be back tomorrow then."
He grumbled looking into my eyes and I suddenly forgot about everything. "Your mom won't hit on me again, will she?"
"She probably will." I answered honestly.
"Dammit, I'll just stick by your side then from now on."
"Sounds good to me." Right now, nothing sounded any better.
A/N: I don't know... Whatever, its already written. I promise the next chapter will be better. Hope you enjoyed it. And thank you to everyone for the huge support. I was gone all weekend and came home to a barrage of e-mails. Really made my day. Why am I still awake...