Tony was an expert at burying his hurt under layers of sarcasm and alcohol. He had been doing it for years, with his father, with the few people who had managed to ensnare his heart, with Pepper when they parted ways…
But for some inexplicable reason, when he tried to cover the hole Bruce's rejection had left with hard cynicism and whiskey, it just wasn't working. The ache was raw and sharp, digging brutally into the metal core of his heart and making him feel like he was dying from palladium poisoning all over again.
He downed another shot of whiskey, ignoring the annoying lilt of JARVIS's voice in favor of his iPod, the not at all vain sounds of Black Sabbath's Iron Man blasting in his ears. He felt the sting of tears in his eyes and he wiped them away with an angry growl. Tears had no place in his eyes; hell, he didn't even know why he felt so strongly towards that nitwit biochemist. No one had ever managed to weasel there way so close to Tony's heart, not even Pepper. What the hell was so special about Bruce-freaking-Banner?
As soon as he thought the question, answers starting rushing through his mind, making him remember the warm, happy feeling he always felt around Bruce now that he was without it. The way he could smile with just his eyes, or the crinkles that appeared around the corners of his mouth when Tony managed to get him to laugh, the exasperated look he adopted when he was trying to convince Tony to eat something after a science-induced fast that lasted more than thirty six hours, the fact that he cared enough to make Tony ate at all…
He let out a sharp, pained half-scream and swept the bottle of whiskey and shot glasses off the table in front of them, still far too sober and unable to stand being drunk. He hadn't noticed it, but when Bruce was around, he drank less. Originally, he thought it was guilt over the fact that Bruce couldn't get drunk, but now, barely tipsy and hating the feeling, he realized he drank less around Bruce because he didn't feel the urge to drink when the other scientist was near.
He swallowed, and made his way to his bed and flopped down unceremoniously, his face buried in the pillow as the full weight of that realization hit him. When Bruce was around him, he was a better man.
And damn it all if he was going to let the doctor ruin that for him!
Tony felt a new determination settle in his stomach, and he took his earbuds out, and picked up the tablet near his bed. He wasn't about to let his best friend/potential lover ruin what they had going; he was going to make Bruce realized that they were good for each other, that they could work, and that Tony loved the stupid twit.
The billionaire's hands froze in his movements, his search for romantic gestures on Google forgotten as he let the full scope of that thought sink into his brain. Love? Did he really love Bruce Banner?
Yes, came the quiet reply in the back of his mind. He was definitely in love with the doctor. Why else would his rejection hurt like this? Why else would Tony's heart flutter every time he saw the man, his stomach drop whenever he thought Bruce was unhappy?
As new and odd as the revelation was, it didn't freak Tony out the way it had freaked him out when he realized he loved Pepper. In fact, to him, it seemed only natural. They were so alike, in so many ways, that Tony wasn't the least bit surprised he had fallen head over heels for the adorable- self-denying doctor. He returned to his search with a small grin on his face, quietly asking JARVIS what Bruce's favorite movie was, and began to plot the downfall of a one Doctor Bruce Banner.
Bruce awoke what seemed like hours later, dried blood on his chest and shoulders. He shuddered slightly and made his way to the en suite bathroom -really, Tony had spent entirely too much money on the Green Room, he only needed a little cage to throw his fits in- and turned the water up so hot it scalded his skin, washing away the evidence of his attempt at suicide.
He could feel the rage still boiling just beneath the surface of his skin, and he sighed to himself. The Other Guy was exceedingly pissed at him, and was holding a grammatically incorrect rant in the back of Bruce's head that he mostly ignored. It was his fault he had wanted to do it in the first place. It was his fault that he couldn't allow himself to love anyone for fear of their death. It was his fault Bruce couldn't have the one man he knew he would be destined for in another life.
Bruce bit down on his tongue and let out a frustrated growl. He sighed and scrubbed at his hair morosely, allowing depression to settle in over his heart. It was easier to be sad, to feel helpless, than to allow his temper to get the better of him. He didn't like being depressed, but it was preferable to the other option. He finished his shower and dried himself, scampering back to his regular room to drown himself in chocolate and self pity.
When he emerged from his room, two days and several boxes of chocolate later, he felt marginally better than he had before and hoped Tony had had enough time to cool off, because the science was calling to him. He made his way to the lab, sighing gratefully when he saw Tony wasn't there. Thank the gods for small blessings, he thought as he settled into his station and began going over his notes.
So emersed was he in his work that he didn't notice Tony had joined him in the lab for a good two hours, until said billionaire clapped him on the shoulder and spoke in his boisterous way.
"Hey, science bro, whatya say to some food? I know you haven't eaten anything but junk in two days, and I just ordered pizza," Tony said with a grin. Bruce blinked at him, having expected a lot worse of a reception the first time he and Tony had met after their not-quite-breakup. He frowned slightly at the billionaire, but found he couldn't muster the energy or will to say no to that grinning face. He nodded his aquinsensce and let Tony lead him into the entertainment room where a steaming pizza was waiting for them; half veggitarian, half meat lovers.
Bruce grinned at the concoction -it really was a horrendous looking pizza, but it tasted delicious- and was surprised at how easily he fell into his old banter with Tony. They talked about science, as usual, but they also reminiesed about the recent missions, and Thor's mishap with Tony's toaster, as well as the decline of creativity in Hollywood.
"I mean, seriously, everything coming out of that place is utter crap; even the movie they made about us was lacking, and it was based on something that was actually pretty awesome!" Tony ranted, and Bruce readily agreed, his hand brushing over the billionaires as he brushed some crumbs off his pants.
Tony was feeling pretty awesome. He had managed to coax Bruce into lunch with him, and it had gone much better than he had expected. He thought that Bruce would be acting skittish, and at first, he had been. But when Tony acted like everything was normal, so did Bruce. So, when Tony found them shoulder to shoulder, Bruce practically on his lap as he waved his arms about trying to get his point across, he felt a familiar flutter in his chest, and knew that this was how it was supposed to be.
"How about a movie?" Tony asked at length, after they had finished nearly all the pizza. Bruce grinned at him, and Tony thought he'd never seen anything sexier than that expression on Bruce's face.
"Sure. What do you have?" he asked and Tony snorted.
"Everything."
Snort. "Of course you do."
"Are you doubting me, Banner?"
"Of course not."
"Mhm. Sure sounds like doubt to me."
"You're imagining things, Stark. I think you should listen to Steve and get that MRI he keeps bagering you about."
"Oh, ha ha, Doctor. You're absolutely hilarious, you know."
"I'm well aware of that fact, Shellhead."
The two were reduced to immature giggles at the nickname, one Dr. Doom had dubbed him with a few months before. When their fit subsided, brown eyes met brown, and Tony felt the overwhelming urge to kiss the man before him, but he suppressed it.
"JARVIS, toll film," he said, and the lights dimmed and the wall screen flickered on and Tony tore his eyes away from Bruce and flickered to the screen.
"You didn't tell him what to play," Bruce murmured.
"He's on shuffle, Brucey," the billionaire murmured back. "Now hush, I like this one."
Bruce snorted as the opening music for Cinderella played. Tony was still a kid at heart.
A/N: I'm sooooooo soooorrrrryyy for the wait, my beautiful reviewers. Certain events have kept me from my keyboard, and I apologize deeply. I am back on the proverbial horse, however, and working on the beginning of the sequel of A Chemical Reaction; I don't wanna say too much, but this story is getting near it's end and the sequel may or may not contain copious amounts of the Stark Spangled Banner. Anyway, thanks for reading, reviews are drugs for me, and a happy end is on the way!