Forgiven

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters in this story. I am merely borrowing them from the lovely JK Rowling for a bit. No copyright infringement intended.

Rated M for sexual content, language & possible violence.

Author's note: Sorry it's a bit short, I've been a busy the last few days. I may come back and fix this chapter, I'm not 100% sure I like it. I'll post a new chapter within the next two days. Feedback is appreciated!

Chapter 6:

Draco didn't know what he was going to show Harry or even where he was going to take him. But the thoughts in his head were getting to be too much for him and being alone in that intimate space was making his thought process fuzzy.

"You know what's strange?" He said trying to make conversation as he led Harry out from the pitch and toward the black lake.

"Hm?" Harry replied, lifting his head to look at him as they walked side by side.

"I was just thinking that it's odd that of everyone I've met here at school, I'd say you know me the best," He glanced at Harry.

"Why do you say that? Aside from this year all of our encounters have either been you calling my friends and me names or us throwing hexes at each other" Harry replied with a slight laugh. "And if what you've got to show me is the lake don't bother because you've now taken me here three times."

Draco shot him a look for the second comment before continuing, "Let's not forget sixth year when you were bloody obsessed with me," He smirked as he watched Harry's cheeks began to turn pink.

"I was not obsessed!" Harry snapped.

"I took Polyjuice Potion a few times to sneak up to the Room of Requirement and I heard Weasley and the Mud uh- Granger complaining about it," He sneered. "Not to mention you were always staring at me."

"You're making that up," Harry said though he still looked somewhat embarrassed. Draco noted that he had ignored his mistake of almost calling Granger a Mudblood and was grateful.

"They said something about your latest fixation being something about me not showing up on a map anymore?" He sniggered.

"I thought you were up to something and just in case you don't remember I was right," Harry said. He could tell he was beginning to get under his skin and it caused him to feel a twisted sense of pleasure.

"Sure, sure." Draco smiled despite the dark subject that had just been brought up. "But no matter what the reason you were still obsessed with me."

"Where are we going Malfoy?" Harry said abruptly changing the subject.

"It's just up here," He said pointing into the distance, offering him a reassuring smile.

They walked in silence for several minutes as Draco tried to decide where to go. The old oaf's hut was coming up and before long the only thing left in their path was the Forbidden Forest. He began to panic and stopped, turning to look into the Gryffindor's green eyes. Harry stared at him expectantly, his curiosity about what he was about to be shown obvious on his face.

"Malfoy…?"

Draco stared at Harry in the way he had his entire life. It was a yearning that burned inside him like a fire. The look of disgust that had always accompanied it was something no one could understand, it wasn't hatred toward Harry, not at all. It was hatred toward himself. It was the war that had been going on inside his head since the moment he had laid eyes on him. It was the fact that for so long he had wanted Harry and for so long he had been exactly what he couldn't have.

He realized he resented the boy with jet black hair and the lightning bolt scar who stood before him. Harry had what Draco always wanted, the strength to make the right choice no matter how hard it was. Draco had spent his entire life doing something he didn't even know if he believed in because Harry had been right the first time; he, Draco Malfoy, was a coward. He despised Harry for his courage but he wanted that boy and it had been growing in him for eight unbearable years.

"Potter…" He choked out and under the pressure of the expectant eyes on his, he made a choice and did the only thing he could think to do at that moment. He reached his arm around Harry, placed his hand on the back of his neck, leaned forward and forced their lips together firmly.

His senses exploded. Every nerve in his body came alive, his stomach bottomed out and fireworks burst behind his closed eyelids. Harry tasted sweet, exactly as he had always imagined. And he didn't mind that Harry's glasses were pressing into his cheek or that he was slightly taller than him so he had to lean down a bit to reach him or that he wasn't kissing back… He wasn't kissing back. He… isn't… kissing… back.

Draco forced himself to pull away, gasping for air as it had all been stolen from his lungs the moment their mouths had met. Harry's eyes were wide as he staggered back, nearly falling over his own feet.

"What the fuck Malfoy," Harry finally said, slightly out of breath as he wiped off his mouth with the back of his hand. Draco finally dared to meet his eyes despite the fact that he was absolutely terrified of what he was going to find.

"I- I'm…" But he couldn't get out the words, Harry's lips were swollen and his hair was much more disheveled than usual, the very sight causing Draco's pants to tighten and making his knees go weak. He could feel his entire body shaking "I'm not sorry Potter," He spat. "I'm not."

Harry stared at him, his features twisting up. "Why did you do that?" He asked.

"Because I wanted to," Draco grumbled, his heart pounding against his chest as he tried to decide his next move. What had he done? He could feel panic building inside him, threatening to erupt into a full blown attack if he didn't get out of there. He reached out grabbing Harry's arm as he got entirely too close to him one last time. "I'm not sorry Potter," His eyes searched the other's hoping that by some miracle he would see the need he felt for him reflected there. But instead he saw nothing but fear looking back at him through those beautiful green eyes.

His face fell and he turned and took off running up to the castle leaving Harry standing there completely dumbfounded and alone. He made it back in and to the dungeons in record time. He barked the password and forced his way in, still running as he burst through the door to the dormitories. He could hear several of the boys groan as he turned on the lights and made his way to the four poster bed in the corner.

"Blaise!" He hissed. "Zabini wake the fuck up!"

"For fucks sake Zabini wake up and get him out of here," Theo said, throwing a pillow in their direction. It hit Blaise in the side of the face and he bolted upright, nearly slamming directly into Draco who was leaning over him.

"What's wrong?" Blaise asked, rubbing his eyes.

"Come on," He said and grabbed Blaise's arm. He got out of bed, following behind him as they moved to the common room. Draco looked around, double checking that no one else was in there to hear the conversation that was about to take place.

"Draco what's going on?" Blaise said. "Why do you look like you've just been running? Oh merlin, why is your hair so messed up?"

"I kissed Potter," He said, the words coming out of his mouth short and fast, sounding foreign to him as he spoke them.

"Wh-What?" Blaise spluttered, a huge grin spreading across his face. "Can you repeat that?" He started to laugh.

Draco shot him a look and punched him on the arm, scowling. "Shut the hell up. It's not funny Zabini," He threw himself into a chair, sighing dramatically. The entire thing was so much worse now that he had said it out loud. He briefly wondered if he had chosen the worst possible person to tell.

"What happened?" Blaise had stopped laughing and moved toward him, resting his hand on his shoulder comfortingly. Draco relaxed, realizing that if there was anyone he could trust it was Blaise. After all he had been the only person from school he had come out to and no one knew about that yet. He had never admitted his feelings for Potter to him before but he assumed Blaise was intelligent enough to guess that the reason he was so fixated with him had gone deeper than it appeared.

"We went flying and I just couldn't help it Zabini. We got too close and I took him off by the lake and…" He whispered, hanging his head.

"Was it good?" Blaise asked with a grin, surprising Draco. He moved to sit across from him, leaning forward so they could continue to whisper. His expression was eager as he awaited his response.

"Of course it was," Draco smirked, "He's the sodding boy who lived."

"Alright well you're smirking again so at least we know he hasn't broken you, I was a bit worried when I saw your hair wasn't perfect," Blaise teased and leaned back into the chair. "What happened after? Did he say anything?"

Draco could feel his cheeks getting flushed as he tried not to think about the moment he was explaining to his friend. "He asked me what the fuck I was doing and then he asked me why. I don't know why the hell I did it Zabini," Draco sighed, slowly running his fingers through his hair, which he was now somewhat self-conscious about.

"Because you bloody love him," Zabini chuckled. "You've been butt hurt about Potter the entire time I've known you Draco. I'll admit I had no idea it was this serious but honestly…"

"I do not!" Draco snapped, shaking his head. He sat there for a moment, staring into the fire before finally getting to his feet. "I'm going to bed," He said, still scowling as he headed back to the dormitory.

"Don't get upset with me Malfoy, you're the one who woke me up in the middle of the night." Blaise called after him. Draco heard him coming up to follow behind him as he finished "At least now you know and you can get over it. It will all be alright mate, promise."

Draco awoke the next day feeling as if he had been hit by the Knight Bus. Blaise had tried to get him to go to breakfast but he refused, as well as lunch and dinner. He was embarrassed to see Harry of course but he was mainly just worried that everyone else was going to find out about his sexuality that he had managed to keep under wraps for so long. He managed to sleep through all of his classes, only getting up to go to the bathroom.

Only after the other boys returned to the room to go to bed did he finally get up. He was starving, he needed a bath and he had grown extremely restless from lying there all day. He grabbed a handful of Cauldron Cakes from the sweets table in the common room and shoved several of them into his mouth. He realized he needed real food as the sugariness of it made his stomach clench painfully.

He pushed the thought from his head and fastened his Prefect badge onto his robes as he left the dungeons, heading to the bathroom on the fifth floor. He walked in, taking in the peaceful atmosphere the glow of the moon gave the room. It was dark and the stars shone brightly in the sky. He lit a few candles and turned on the faucet, climbing into the tub when it was full enough. He sank into the warmth of the water and let out a soft sigh as he let his eyes fall closed.

The moment was short lived as he heard a muffled giggle. His eyes flew open and darted around searching for the source of the sound. Finally after a few moments Moaning Myrtle came flying out the faucet. "Hello Draco," She said, moving around the room slowly.

"Myrtle," He said with a nod before pressing a button to release more of the large bubbles so she wouldn't be able to see his body under the water.

"You haven't come to see me all year," She said sadly, her voice excruciatingly nasally.

"I haven't really had a reason," He answered, his eyes following her as she drifted about the room. "You do live in the girl's lavatory."

She glared at him, staying silent for a long time. "I saw what that Potter boy did to you," She finally said, her expression exceptionally gloomy. Without much thought Draco glanced down at his chest, reaching down to trace the scar that remained there from the incident she was referring to.

"I thought you were going to join me," She said dreamily. "We could have haunted the first floor bathroom together."

"As appealing as that sounds…" Draco snorted, the idea of him as a ghost haunting a bathroom with Moaning Myrtle was extremely unsettling but knowing he wouldn't be facing such a fate he was also able to find it quite comical.

"He was in here the other day," She said despondently, finally ceasing moving about and stopping to sit upon the edge of the bathtub furthest from him. "He didn't know I was here."

"Why were you watching him Myrtle?" Draco smirked. A small pout formed on her lips as she crossed her arms over her chest. For a moment he was afraid she was about to start wailing as she sometimes did but luckily she stopped at the sulking.

"Just one of the many perks of being dead," She said glumly. Her face perked up as something crossed her mind. "He was doing unspeakable things" She hissed, putting a hand to her mouth as she burst into a fit of giggles.

"Such as?" Draco asked sounding bored. She had piqued his interest but from his past experiences with her he knew he couldn't let her find this out. The ghost loved to play games and he wasn't in the mood to humor her.

"Well… you know" She cackled, fluttering her eyelashes.

"If you're not going to tell me then leave me to my bath, I came here to relax and I don't need you telling everyone who comes in here what I look like naked," He snapped at her. She looked hurt and retreated to the wall, pushing her hand through it as if to threaten that she was about to go.

"Well if you don't want me here I'll leave," She retorted. "But he did say your name…" She said and looked to him quickly to watch his reaction.

He forced his expression to stay neutral but suddenly everything had clicked. The vision of Potter wanking himself off, his back pressed against the wall of the shower that stood in the corner of the very room he was in. Panting, moaning… his body shaking as he came… saying Draco's name?

"What do you mean he said my name?" He asked.

She lingered at her place by the wall, bringing her hand back to hang at her sides as she floated in the air. "You know," She grinned. "He did those unspeakable things and right before… the unspeakable thing ended he said 'Draco'. It was quite peculiar..."

"Quite peculiar indeed…" He couldn't help the grin that formed on his lips.

"Well I'll leave you to your bath but Draco do come see me soon?" She said with a little wave and finally disappeared through the wall, giggling loudly as she did.

He sat motionless for several minutes as he questioned what he had just been told. Myrtle had no reason to lie to him. In fact she had been extremely loyal to him in his sixth year. But if she had been telling the truth then why had Potter reacted so viciously to his kiss? Was he afraid? Draco dropped down into the water, his mind racing as he slowly began to formulate a plan.