Note: Most of this is shamelessly plagiarized from 'A Barve Like That' by Montgomery. .'

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Well, it turned out that the reason people did not get out of the sarlacc again was not that they had no jet packs and thus couldn't fly. The reason they didn't get out was that they were glued to the skin of the beast with sticky goo and tentacles. Just my luck. I had woken suddenly, thinking 'you are Boba Fett' which is strange and should not happen. I am still me.

Of course, I had tried to get my blaster, but hey, those tentacles glued me to the wall perfectly, I could not move. And what was worse, my feet did not touch the ground. Wherever I was, I was hanging helpless with no idea how far above -

I, indeed, was Lorna Kees. I felt like whacking myself. Stupid, stupid, stupid. With my tongue, I flicked the helmet's systems on again. There was still not much to see. I was in a kind of tunnel, not made from rock, but organic. But then, what did I expect, inside of the sarlacc? A few meters to each side it curved sharply out of sight. I crack sounded in the distance, and screams. It seemed I was not alone down here.

You are Boba Fett?

It sounded more like a question this time, I did not know what to say. What use would it be to deny down here? What use to tell the truth? Suddenly I had to think of my arrival here. It came back in a vivid rush, the images as if I was reliving them, the alarm claxons of the SlaveI, the shock of the dampers, the IG-2000 hurtling past me into the desert. I gasped. It was more intense than memory. And it had not been my idea, either.

"How did you do that to me?" I asked the darkness around me.

It felt like amusement, but it was not mine. And there was something like a voice in my head, telling me that it had been easy, that I was easy because I live strongly. Well, what choice did I have? Being Boba Fett was a pretty intense life.

"Who are you?" I wanted to know.

As you are my past, I am your destiny, it replied. But that did not make much sense. I was not it's past. I was my own past, and I also intended to be in my future. I did not believe in destiny. But my opinion was obviously not asked here. My memory flashed back to the negotiations with Jabba.

It had been a little embarrassing then, and it did not feel any better now. I did not know how I had gotten the crazy idea, but once I started it had been difficult to stop. Getting Solo across as a piece of art had taken quite a life of its own.

Art created by the Dark Lord, I heard myself say again, quite pleased with the idea then. Art created by Vader just had to be worth something. Now I tried to wince, if this thing was going to grope through all my memories, I had to do something before it found some really embarrassing ones. Or Kestrel.

The grimace is quite - wonderful, Jabba said in my head. It was symptomatic that he should like something like that. I tried to notch out of the memory as good as I could, wondering how to escape. There were some memories which were just a no-go.

You will get your money, Jabba's voice pounded through me, announcing the end of that special scene. And it was gone. I shook my head, trying to get it clear, but it felt like an abused apparatus, the gears twisted, broken, and stuck.

"Don't do that to me again," I demanded.

If you keep me amused…

To hell with it. Was I to choose the memories to be ravaged myself? "Who the blazes are you?"

The sarlacc -, it began, but I snorted.

"Sarlacci are not sentient."

There was a short pause. I am Sujeso.

The wall seemed to react to the name, shivering softly. I had one like you, once, bright and sharp around the edges.

"I am a hunter," I hoped to be convincing. "I bring down those who deserve it, there is little room to be unclear on the subject." Well, at least it sounded like a real Fett answer.

You remind me of someone, a Jedi I ate thousands of years ago. Would you like to meet her?

The idea of meeting the half-digested ghost of a Jedi from millennia ago scared me. There was not much left in the galaxy that could do that, but then, most of the galaxy was flesh and blood and could be dealt with terminally, if necessary. Also, I did not want yet another being in my head, having this Sujeso in and out of my thoughts at his will was bad enough.

"Keep your Jedi to yourself," I said.

Very well. But you will look forward to a break in the tedium soon enough.

The presence vanished and I hung a lone in the smelly darkness. Not even the screams of those who had fallen in with me could be heard anymore. Either they were all dead already, or tangled into similar conversations as I had just been. I wondered if it was better to be digested quickly or hang here, bothered by Sujeso.

For the longest time, nothing happened. I tried to sleep, but it was just not happening. Maybe something the sarlacc did, maybe I was just too cranky. And as Sujeso had predicted, I got bored soon.

"Is there a purpose?" I asked the emptiness, trusting that I would be heard.

For you? Sujeso seemed thoughtful. I suppose not. But your life and death belong to me now. And so you will serve my purpose. You are no longer a self, you are part of me now.

"The air smells to bad to me to believe that," I snarled. What did he think he would achieve? Being a part of him? Don't make me laugh. Tentatively, I tugged at a restraint, and was crushed to the wall immediately. The pain made clear that I was still very much myself. And that would be the way it would stay. I gritted my teeth.

You and I and everything else - we are just a process. A process that has broken away from the Real, but sooner or later, we will rejoin it. You've barely been down here a day, Boba Fett. There are sentients who've been kept alive for hundreds of years.

There was a long pause.

Thousands of years, in some cases. He seemed weary beyond belief.

And then it hit me. "You lie," I accused him. "You are not the sarlacc! You are down here - with me!"

Don't be so sure that I am not the sarlacc. I am her longer than you can imagine. And when I am happy, it is happy. What amuses me, amuses it.

There was a ripple running through the wall behind me, almost like laughter.

I expect you will be with us for some time.

I wished I had a thermal detonator. I would have blown him up right then. Him, the sarlacc, me, everything. He left me alone then, maybe not wanting to feel my anger, leaving to bother another unfortunate soul caught down here, somebody more amusing.

I waited. I waited some more and finally dawn came. The tunnel to my left lightened up, a little at first, but when the sun stood directly over the sarlacc's gaping mouth, I could see my surrounding clearly. To clear. The walls were greyish green and looked damp, but that was not all. It was covered with tentacles, some several meters long, hundreds of thousands of them. Mostly, they lay still, but sometimes one would suddenly whip around, it's tip breaking the sound barrier and cracking loudly. I had heard the cracking before, but knowing where it came from did not make things much better. A little better than thinking it was breaking bones, but not much.

I drank a little from the water supply. It had grown warm and the reek filtering in through the helmet did not improve the taste. But I had to save energy. I could not rely on the input of the solar cells hidden on me, mostly because they were covered with goo, but also because the light making it down here was not enough to run anything. If I wanted to get out, I had to be careful with my resources. Still I wondered how big the sarlacc was, since the cracking was continuous, but the tentacles I could see moved barely. How many of them would I have to fight on my way out?

But you're not going to get out again - nobody has.

Sujeso took over my mind, filling it with the memory of Kess, a Corellian gambler. He had fallen into the sarlacc by accident and by now could not even remember who he really was and who the girl he loved really was. That he loved her was never in doubt, but with the personalities always shifting, taking over one another, blending, exchanging memories, it was difficult for Kess to remember what the truth he had started out with was.

He told Sujeso stories, some of his life, some parables about life, and if Sujeso was not happy with the stories, the sarlacc would digest Kess a little faster. It was meant to be a lesson and I did learn something: I needed to get out fast. I began to check my weapons.

Blaster rifle, wrist lasers, rocket dart launcher, grappling hook, flame thrower, concussion grenade launcher - but those needed to be worked with hands, hands that right now were glued tight to the stomach of the sarlacc. And if I strained, I only got gripped harder. It also tried to get its tentacles under my armour. So far without success, though the tugging at my right leg was getting a real pain. Maybe it would be enough to distract me from my burning skin.

The armour was made to keep out bullets, blaster bolts and other projectiles, to protect against blows and such, it was not made to keep liquids out. And so the digestive fluid had slowly crept over my body, burning my skin. There were only two regions untouched yet: my head and my crotch. I had known that one day this silly cod piece would be useful. In retrospect, I still wish it hadn't.

All I could use was my helmet. The comlink was dead. Either the sarlacc blocked everything, or there was just nobody around. Maybe even both, wouldn't blame anybody, this was not a classical holiday spot. I wished the sarlacc would stop wriggling my right knee, it made it even more difficult to think straight. I tried to kick.

Violently, the tentacle wrenched at my leg, pulling the knee down. I was pretty sure that without the armour, my right leg would now lie in the puddle of fluids on the ground. As it was, I just got yanked into a slightly askew position and - and my right foot was touching ground. It might not be a great help, but at least, I was not hanging metres above the floor, having to wonder about how to land when I came free. I scraped my heel softly over the ground, thinking. Then I decided.

Boosting all the helmet's sensors, I scanned my surroundings. If nothing useful came off it, I had wasted precious power, but if I wanted out, I needed to try and find out where I was more or less exactly. It was not as bad as it could have been, but not too good either. I was about forty meters under the ground, and ten from the main chamber. If I could get there, my jet pack could most likely fly me out. So the real problem was not getting upwards right now.

Then Sujeso returned.

I knew the night just as I remembered standing in front of my door, wondering about Kestrel's little surprise. I was tempted to reach out and touch the door, feel the grey plastisteel under my fingers, simply return.

But there was no return. I was still stuck in the rank darkness of the sarlacc and

- then the door opened -

It even smelled like home. The subtle aromas you tend to forget about and are surprised to smell when you return after a longer absence. The floor polish, the furniture, the subtle wooden undertone of my prized table. I felt my tears rise. Kestrel was there, his smile half shy half exhilarated, the hair slightly in disarray, the gap between his front teeth -

I wanted to scream and run, but my memory all but flung herself at him. I did not want this. I did not want to remember the flowers, the candles, the ring, the kiss, the - NO!

I leaned against my restrains, jerking violently, willing the beast to react. The sarlacc pulled its tentacles tight around me, bending my limbs, making pain explode in my head. I fought until I tumbled into a blissful unconsciousness.

It did not last long enough. When I came to myself again, Sujeso was there. Again or still, who cared. I had to get out, and be it only to pay back on Kestrel. My resolve turned into steel harder than the armour I already wore. I. Would. Get. Out!

"I swear I will get out, I swear by the life I almost had, that I will kill you."

Kill who? It sounded like laughter. The one who's talking to you? Or the one who's eating you?

Still trying to mess with my head? Fine, I can do that, too. "Either," I replied. "Both."

That had been the wrong answer. Instead of pouting or doing something similarly useful, meaning away from me, Sujeso pushed the next set of memories on me.

She had almost gotten out, that Jedi Sujeso had told me about. And it was her memory that now dominated my mind. I hated it, not her, because it was probably not her fault, but the fact that my mind could be taken over just like that, as if it was just another of so many projectors to which a live could be watched. She almost got out.

There was not even a name to her anymore, just a presence knowing that is was, had been, might still be a sixty year old female Jedi. She did not fall into the sarlacc, but was grabbed by one of the tentacles. It was still very young than and probably did not realize that the sand that came down with her would make its digestive fluids mostly useless - for a time at least. So she laid there and thought about sarlacci and found the Choi hanging there, half digested already. That was Sujeso, almost a child still and very angry about being eaten. I could imagine.

She waited until it was day again, then called her lightsaber to her hand, cut the tentacles holding her an jumped. It was a five meter jump, and it seemed that this was not easy for a Jedi to do. I filed that down under useful facts. But she had to try, not matter how hard it would be. So she jumped, would have made it, too, if one of the tentacles had not taken hold of her ankle and pulled her down again. In the process she broke several ribs and her leg in the process, making any other attempts futile. She was caught then, and the sarlacc still in pain and angry.

The lightsaber had been lost, too. The Jedi had passed out after the fall and when she came to herself again, the weapon had been gone. The sarlacc was queasy and restrained her so hard, that the blood could not flow through her arms and legs well. She was a kind woman in a strange way. She tried to apologize to the beast, telling it that she would not have done it, if she had not been forced to.

Her constant chatter finally got on the nerves of the Choi. If you must chatter, at least do it to the benefit of the one who can listen to you, he snapped.

She had fallen silent for a while, but life down here was boring. Very boring, and painful, if you counted being digested in. So she suggested to Sujeso that they tell each others stories against the boredom.

And he still was on that trip now, I guessed.

Talk to a sarlacc, indeed. Jedi were strange, if she was a typical one, and what Skywalker had done up there not long ago was something different, too. He had been stronger than this one for sure. He would not let a five meter leap detain him. But then he was much younger, too. I was a little relieved that I did not have to take up Skywalker now. He was so strong, and those powers were a little scary. I would probably not have gotten him anyway. I let myself sag a little.

Such thoughts were vain as long as I was stuck here. And the longer I was stuck, the less likely I was to get out. And the more hurt I would be. It was a pleasant idea, just hanging in here until I was to weak to go after Skywalker. But I had no choice really. If I wanted out, I had to go soon. And if that meant I would have to face down Skywalker - well, bad luck for me.

I considered my options which were few. I had one heel on the ground, nothing much to stand on, much less to jump with. The tentacles held me firmly, if not painfully, and as long as they did, there was nothing I could do. I can take you with me, I thought suddenly. And if it's the last thing I do. I did not take kindly to being digested, and even worse to having my mind and memory ravaged. Well then, so be it.

I miss the Jedi.

"Then you should not have eaten her," I accused Sujeso.

I didn't! There was definitely anger in Sujeso's voice. The sarlacc ate her!

"And you didn't stop it. You didn't help her," I went on. "You did not help anybody in the four thousand years you have been here!"

It worked. Sujeso got mad, and the sarlacc reacted to it. Around me the wall began to shift, the tentacles moved and I got squeezed harder than before.

"And now you are hurt, just because I told you that? Why did you not help the Jedi escape? She would have come back for you, she would have helped you!"

Around me the tentacles began to whip around, the wall behind me wobbled and I got pressed into it real hard. Just what I needed, just a little more…

"Why did you never think about that, huh? Because you're stupid!" I was almost suffocated. "Because you're a miserable wretch of an excuse for a sentient being! Because you don't have the courage -"

Around me mayhem wreaked havoc, as well as that could happen in a digestive tract. I was squeezed against the wall so tightly that lights rushed across my vision, little stars rushing past to show me the way. I strained with all my power, dug my heel into the ground and pushed upwards.

As my body pushed up, squeezed fast against the sarlacc's innards, the emergency switch of my jetpack was pushed down. It blazed to life, burning the sarlacc behind be, and setting everything in the vicinity on fire. The beast almost suffocated me in its pain, the tentacles whipping around like deadly snakes, but not for long. the jetpack was never meant to work in such close quarters.
It exploded.

Everything around me was on fire. I was on fire, burning like a torch. The shockwave had thrown me on the ground, and I must have been unconscious for a few seconds. The armour did not do well. Corroded by the fluids it was cracked in many places, the fire scorched my skin, the exposed parts of me, and where the armour touched my body, it was searing hot as well.

Take you with me, I thought grimly, reaching for the grenade launcher. If I was on fire, so would he. I aimed at the ceiling, barely thirty centimetres above my head and fired. Then I flung myself back into the burning acid on the floor.

I was not fast enough. The concussion grenade exploded, tearing up the world and slamming me hard into the ground. My left arm had still been under my body, and the world went down in white pain as it snapped under the weight of my body. Tears shot into my eyes, rendering most of the electronics temporarily useless. Going down in a blaze of glory, real Fett style there, Lorna.

Sand rained down on me, extinguishing some of the flames, sucking up a little of the acid, kindling hope. I don't think I have ever felt as heavy as when I lifted myself up, my left arm dangling uselessly at my side. Sand.
I looked up.
Forty meters under the ground.
I looked along the burning corridor to the main chamber.
Sujeso was there, and tentacles of a very angry sarlacc. Strong and uninjured tentacles.
I raised the grenade launcher again.
One down, two to go.
With no sarlacc in the way to stop it, the grenade went high into the sand. There was only a slight shaking of the ground when it exploded. More sand came down.
Two down, one to go.

I looked up. I looked at the launcher. Then I looked to where the main chamber was.
If it had a trigger, it could be short circuited. If it had a power cell, it could overload.

Carefully I set the butt of the weapon down on the floor. I wriggled the poisoned darts from the launchers at my knee into the barrel, I wedged the last grenade in over them with the power cell of my blaster. Difficult if you had only one arm and two wobbly legs, but I did it. I mead sure the power cell would overload and trigger the grenade launcher. I hurled the weapon into the direction of the main chamber with all my strength. It did not go far.

It would take a long time to overload, but then, I would take a long time to get out of here, too. I piled up sand under the opening until it was high enough to pull myself out. Forty metres. I began to climb.

I had thought it would be a little like swimming upwards through a sea of sand. It was not. It was much more like trying to swim up a waterfall - in complete darkness. At first I was sacred to lose the way, sand all around and I was going so slow. I turned off everything in my helmet except life support and the display indicating where up was. I need not have worried so much. Down here the sand was packed, hard as durasteel, where the grenade had not gone trough it. With bare hands, I would not have gotten anywhere.

It took forever. My whole body ached, burned, throbbed and the sand ground on my exposed, raw skin. Fine dust filtered into my air system, and slowly choked me. I grew tired. I wanted to sleep, give up, hang in here and forget. I already closed my eyes, there was nothing to bee seen in this darkness anyway, only a small red arrow pointing upwards.

Suddenly, my hand grabbed hold of nothing. I felt around, but there was indeed nothing. When I bent my wrist, I could make out sand below it. Sand below! I wanted to break into a flurry of movements and rush to the surface, see light, feel air, breathe -

Bit I knew that I would just get stuck if I moved to hasty now, not mentioning that I might not quite be in the condition to move fast at all. Carefully, I unearthed myself, pulled one leg out of the ground, pulled up the other leg, laid down flat on my belly to give the sand time to settle down under me.

That was the reason, I was sure. Let the sand settle, nothing to do with my condition, nothing at all. My panting was feeble, so what. There were dots dancing in front of my eyes, but that was probably just the helmet display malfunctioning, too much sand. And I did feel my body, all of it, painfully. Nothing to worry about. Nothing to worry. It was all over.

I rolled onto my back, staring into the glaring blue of the sky.
I had made it.
Killed the sarlacc.

Killed it.

I have not been eaten. The sky got blurry as tears rose to my eyes.

Alive.

I had made it.
But to what end? I did not feel the sand stinging in my wounds anymore. My broken arm was a subdued throb, my breath seemed to go ragged at best.
I looked at the wavering sky.
Cloudless blue desert over Tatooine - I inhaled it deeply; saw it grow dark at the edges of my vision - exhaled, and let the darkness come.