Forbidden – Chapter 6
The following morning just after the bell rang for morning mass, Maria was following the other postulants into the Abbey chapel when Sister Berthe stopped her. Resisting the urge to drop to the floor and kiss it, Maria asked her hesitantly, "Is there something wrong, Sister?"
Sister Berthe narrowed her eyes slightly and motioned towards the front courtyard near the front gate of the Abbey with her head. "There is someone to see you Maria."
"Someone?" Maria asked straightaway. "Who…?"
"He was very insistent," the nun told Maria.
"He?" Maria repeated, not quite believing her ears for there was only one he that she knew of.
"Yes, a matter of great importance, apparently." Sister Berthe rolled her eyes looking unimpressed, but Maria didn't notice. Instead she muttered her gratitude to the nun before she quickly made her way towards the front courtyard. That courtyard was the only part of the Abbey, save for the Reverend Mother's office, which was not cloistered away from the outside world.
As she rounded the corner, she stopped in her tracks. Her heart soared: it was Georg. Over the past few weeks since she'd been back at the Abbey, she'd dreamed of this moment, especially after their brief encounter the day before. But now seeing him at the Abbey, standing so close to her and knowing there was no way they could be together, she wondered why he was there. Nonetheless, she was very pleased to see him.
Maria took a moment to quietly observe him. He had his back turned to her, seemingly engrossed in admiring one of the statues in the courtyard. His hat in his hand, he was dressed in his light grey suit, the one he was wearing when they'd argued a month before on the lakeside. As Georg was looking so stylish and sophisticated, Maria suddenly felt very self-conscience dressed in her black postulant's dress and nun's wimple, but it couldn't be helped.
Maria closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Opening them, she slowly moved towards him until she was only an arm's width away.
"Hello," she said quietly. At hearing her voice, Georg turned around and straightaway a broad smile came over his face.
"Maria," he gushed as he instinctively moved forward to take her in his arms. Maria quickly took a step backwards and shook her head. She flicked her eyes back in the direction of the passageway from where she'd come from. At once several nuns walked slowly past on their way to morning mass.
Georg nodded in understanding. There were too many people around. "Can you talk?" he asked.
"Yes," Maria replied. "The Sisters are on their way to morning mass. They won't miss me for a while." She glanced around the courtyard again but it was completely deserted now that all the Sisters had entered the chapel.
"Good," he replied. "I was worried they wouldn't let me see you. The nun who answered the gate seemed quite fierce and determined to say no to my request."
Maria let out a low laugh. "Oh, that was Sister Berthe." Georg mouthed an "ah!", gave her a knowing look and chuckled, remembering the many stories Maria had told him about her.
They then stood looking at each other in an awkward silence, both not quite knowing what to say next but then Maria finally spoke. "You really shouldn't be here, you know," she told him, but despite her words sounding like she was rebuking him, he could sense how pleased she was to see him.
"I know, but I couldn't stay away," he replied as sheepishly as a young schoolboy. He gave her one of those wicked half-smiles she found so irresistible. There was another long, awkward silence as they just stood looking and smiling at each other. But after a few moments, both suddenly spoke at the same time.
"So what did you…?"
"It was good…"
Upon hearing each other speak simultaneously, they both stopped and laughed. Georg gestured for her to go first.
"Oh I was only going to say it was good to see you yesterday," Maria told him genuinely.
"And it was good to see you too," he replied. He looked at her adoringly. Another long silence followed. "I'm sorry about yesterday…" he began.
"No, no," she quickly interrupted. "It was fine, you were with the Baroness…"
Georg shook his head. "No, nothing about this is fine," he spat, his mood quickly changing. "This whole situation is deplorable." He began to pace up and down, his fingers on his left hand wiggling in agitation.
"Georg…" Maria warned but he didn't listen, instead he continued his rant.
"Honestly, that woman…" he fumed. "It's impossible, really. Everywhere I go, every thing I do, she wants to know about it. And don't get me started on these outrageous and extravagant wedding preparations she's made. I suppose it's my own fault really, I did tell her that I didn't care what she wanted. I'd pay for it all and just turn up on the day, and everything else was up to her. Still… it's ridiculous." He shook his head in frustration.
"When is the wedding?" Maria asked. Even after she'd heard practically every detail about his upcoming wedding from the gossiping postulants, she still had no idea when it was scheduled for.
"In about 6 weeks time," he told her. "She wanted to marry quickly but I tried my best to delay it as long as possible. Two months was the compromise." He scowled.
Maria shook her head sadly; she didn't know what to say. She placed her hand on his arm in understanding of the terrible situation they both found themselves in. He took her hand and gave it a squeeze. Letting out a sigh, Maria tried to change the subject. "So… how are you? You look tired."
Georg agreed. "I am tired." He snorted. "Those children of mine are running me ragged. I don't know how you ever did it looking after them everyday. Mountain picnics every other day, ball games, bicycle riding, boat rowing on the lake…" Maria couldn't help but laugh thinking of the seven children dragging Georg all about the countryside. "But I have enjoyed spending more time with them," he told her sincerely. "You were right, they want so much to be close to me, and I'm so grateful you showed me the way before it was too late."
Maria felt glad that even though she wasn't with the children anymore, at least she'd helped them restore their relationship with their father. "How are they?" Maria asked.
"The children? Oh they're fine. In actual fact," he chuckled. "They've been giving Elsa a run for her money with the amount of tricks they've been playing on her."
"Oh no!" Maria sighed with a laugh, not even beginning to imagine what sorts of mischief they'd been up to. "Tell me, what have they been doing to her?"
Georg began to describe the various pranks and nasty tricks the children had been playing on the Baroness. Maria was amazed at the creativity of the children. Apart from the various bugs and spiders the Baroness would find in her bed each night, they had played all sorts of different tricks on her such as: switching her moisturizing cream for whipped cream from the kitchen, taking and hiding one shoe from every pair that she owned, moving her entire wardrobe of clothes to the guest room on the opposite side of the house, and even setting up a trap for her where a bucket of water was dropped on her head as she left the villa. Apparently the Baroness was so livid at the children after that final prank that she wouldn't speak to them for an entire day.
Maria laughed uncontrollably with Georg as he recounted the activities of his mischievous children. It felt so good to laugh again after being so miserable for the past few weeks. And as she laughed, Maria was reminded of the many nights she and Georg would spend together talking and laughing about the children, like they were not only his children, but her children as well.
"I could never understand how children as nice as them could play such nasty tricks on people," Maria admitted.
"According to Brigitta, it's easy," said Georg. "Yes, I know. She told me that once too," Maria agreed with a giggle.
"Normally I would be firmly against the children doing any of these pranks, but I despise Elsa so much right now for everything she's putting us through that I feel quite justified turning a blind eye to it," he told her flippantly, but Maria could hear the spite in his voice.
Immediately Maria stopped laughing. "Georg…" she said with a sigh. She knew they both felt the same way about the Baroness, but there didn't seem a point to keep coming back to talking about a situation they couldn't change. It then occurred to Maria that she still didn't quite know why Georg was there at the Abbey, and she suspected it wasn't just to chitchat about the children.
But before she could ask him why he'd come to see her, he answered her unspoken question. "Anyway enough of all that. I suppose you're wondering why I'm here." Maria nodded. "Well, when the children found out I saw you in town yesterday, they were all boiling mad with me that I'd seen you but they hadn't."
Maria smiled. "Those little dears."
"They insisted I bring you these." Georg pulled a bunch of letters out of the breast pocket of his jacket and gave them to her. "There's one from each of them, even little Gretl. They miss you."
Maria licked her lips and smiled to herself as she looked at the bunch of letters in her hands. "And I miss them too, very much," she told him sincerely. "Please tell the children I'll cherish these forever."
"I will," replied Georg.
Maria quickly flipped through the letters, her eyes shining in delight. "Oh, I can't wait to read these. May I?" She gestured to a nearby stone bench. He nodded and sat down next to Maria as she began to read her letters.
Georg watched Maria slowly read through each of the children's letters. She read each one carefully, smiling as the words of love and affection from the children touched her heart. She laughed as she read the terrible jokes Kurt and Friedrich had included in their letters, and giggled as Louisa proudly described her role in playing the tricks on the Baroness. Georg watched her face fill with joy as she admired the beautiful drawings both Marta and Gretl had done for her, and tears form in her eyes as she read the beautiful sentiments Liesl and Brigitta had written for her.
As he watched her read, Georg was struck again by just how much Maria loved his children and how they loved her in return. For far too long his children had needed a new mother and Georg could see just what a wonderful mother Maria would have been to them. And seeing her sit beside him in her simple black postulants dress and nun's wimple, the sign of her sacrifice for him and the children, he admired her strength and courage and he loved her more at that moment than he ever had before.
But it hurt him to know that the chance of making Maria his wife and mother to his children was gone. He wanted desperately to tell her what was going through his mind and tell her how much he still loved her, despite everything.
As Maria finished reading the last letter, he said quietly. "You know, it's not only the children that miss you."
Maria looked up to see such longing in his eyes. She inhaled deeply. "Is that why you're really here?"
He looked down, not able to find the words to tell her what was in his heart. Instead, he said somewhat cheekily. "I would have, ah… written a letter to you myself, but I'm afraid there were too many things that I wanted to say to you but couldn't."
Maria gazed into his eyes. He was so near sitting beside her, yet so far away knowing they could never be together again. But right at that moment, all she wanted was to hear his voice and be comforted by his presence, even if that moment was all they had. She closed her eyes. "Please tell me," she breathed, "all the things you wanted to tell me."
She was utterly irresistible and he wanted to tell her everything that was in his soul. He shifted closer to her, close enough so that he could whisper into her ear. "I wanted to tell you all the things I love about you, all the things I miss about you, all the things I dream about you…"
His admission caught her by surprise. Maria's breath caught in her throat and she opened her eyes just to see his deep blue eyes gazing back at her, full of adoration and longing. "You've been dreaming about me?" she asked, her voice low and husky.
"Hmm mmm," he hummed. "I dream about kissing you, touching you and making love to you…" He had moved so close to her that he was practically nuzzling his face into her neck. "Haven't you been dreaming about me too?" he asked her softly.
At once, images of her fantasies of Georg from the night before flashed across Maria's mind. Her heart began to race. "Yes I have," she admitted in a whisper. His lips grazed her cheek. "Maria…" he murmured as his fingers caressed her face to gently tilt her chin in his direction.
She didn't answer him but just let his lips find hers. At once she felt her body on fire as he kissed her deeply. Every emotion and every sense of yearning that she'd been trying to hold back came flooding out as he kissed her again and again. Moaning into his mouth in delight, she felt his hands circle her waist and gently move upwards until he was caressing her breasts through her dress. But when he reached up to start to remove her wimple from her head so that he could run his fingers though her short, golden hair, Maria suddenly came to her senses about where they were and what they were doing. She immediately pulled out of his embrace and jumped to her feet.
"Georg, stop. We can't. Not anymore, and especially not here." She glanced around the courtyard and was relieved to find it empty since all the Sisters were still at morning mass.
"I'm sorry, Maria," he apologised as he stood up as well. "I'm not sure what came over me." He looked away ashamed.
"No, don't apologise darling," she said lovingly, reaching up and directing his face towards hers so she could look at him him again. "I want it, I want you. I do, so very much. But this," she motioned between him and herself with her hand, "isn't helping. Have you forgotten what our situation is?" Georg shook his head in frustration. "No of course not," he snapped.
Maria felt confused by him. They'd ended their relationship, he was marrying someone else and yet here he was kissing her and reminding her of everything they couldn't have together. She didn't understand what he was doing. "Georg, why are you here?" she asked him directly.
He looked surprised by her question. "I told you, the letters from the children."
"I know you told me that, but I think that was an excuse. Why are you really here?"
"Why am I…? Maria…?" He seemed to not know what she was talking about.
"Georg," Maria said his name so sharply that he stopped. He looked at her for a moment, almost like he was weighing up whether to tell her the truth or not.
Finally, he nodded. "Alright, alright. The letters were an excuse to come," he said with a sigh as he began to pace. "I'm here because I tried to forget about you, but I can't. Seeing you yesterday stirred all sorts of emotions inside me…" Maria closed her eyes and nodded faintly knowing that was exactly how she felt too.
He stopped, turned back to her and stood directly in front of her. "Maria, I'm so sorry about all of this. Elsa's blackmailing me into marrying her but you know we don't have to go through with it. Just say the word and I can take you home. Today, right now if you want."
Maria wanted nothing more than to go with him, but she turned away from him so he wouldn't see her tears and shook her head. "No Georg, we agreed. You know what the Baroness threatened to do."
He huffed in irritation and began to pace again. Maria knew he was upset but he had to see reason. She walked up beside him and took his hand, causing him to stop pacing. She faced him. "News of your engagement is all around town. It's all everyone talks about, even the other postulants at the Abbey." He looked down to meet her eyes, listening to everything she had to say. "Could you imagine how it'll be? The decorated navy hero jilts his bride at the altar to run off with his children's governess." Georg stretched his jaw, scowling in anger as she spoke. "The scandal will be so much worse than before if you end it now, can't you see?" She looked pleadingly into his eyes. "We have to see this through, no matter how much it's hurting us both. We're doing this for the children, remember? To save them from the shame and humiliation that will come upon them by association if our relationship is revealed."
Georg threw his hands up in the air in defeat. "I know you're right, I do. But I love you Maria, and being apart from you these past few weeks has almost killed me. Not the mention how awful it is for me putting up with this farce of a relationship with Elsa," he huffed in resentment.
Hearing his outburst, Maria looked at him in disbelief. "You make it sound like you're the only one finding this difficult," Maria cried. She pulled off her wimple and shoved it in his face. "Do you think this is easy on me either? Being here alone? Pretending like I want to be back here? I knew a long time ago I wasn't going to be a very good nun. But I'm here because I have nowhere else to go. And even then, the Reverend Mother doesn't wish me to take my vows."
"She doesn't?" Georg asked. Maria shook her head before her emotions got the better of her and she broke down crying. At once Georg took her in his arms, holding her close, stroking her hair lovingly. "Maria, I'm sorry, I didn't think," he soothed. "I didn't mean to imply you're not finding this difficult as well. I know you are. I know you're here alone; at least I have the children. You're being strong and brave, and I admire and love you greatly for it. I just wish there was something we could do to somehow fix this entire awful situation."
"But there's not," she replied sadly as she pulled out of his arms.
Just then the Abbey bell rang, signaling the end of morning mass. Without saying anything more, Maria took her wimple back from Georg and repositioned it on her head. "You should probably go," she told him with regret. He reluctantly agreed.
Maria took his hand and led him to the Abbey gates. Just as Maria was about to unlock the gates to let him out, Georg pulled her into a shadowy corner where they couldn't easily be seen from the surrounding courtyard and kissed her. Maria melted into his arms as they kissed: long, slow and deep passionate kisses, until finally Maria broke free of his embrace.
She unlocked the gate and Georg walked through onto the adjacent street, placing his hat back on his head. But as she closed the gate and locked it again, Georg turned and quickly took the few steps back to the gate to grasp her hand through the iron bars. He kissed her hand tenderly then let it go, before turning and walking away.
As Maria made her way back inside the Abbey to join the other Sisters, she didn't notice the Reverend Mother standing hidden out of view on the other side of the courtyard.
When Sister Berthe had come to her to tell her that Captain von Trapp was at the Abbey to see Maria, the Reverend Mother had skipped morning mass because she'd wanted to speak to the Captain herself while he was at the Abbey. But when she arrived at the courtyard, she couldn't help but stop and watch Maria as she talked with the Captain.
When Maria had told her a few weeks before after she'd arrived back at the Abbey that she was in love with the Captain, the Reverend Mother passed it off as a passing attraction, especially because the Captain was engaged to Baroness Schraeder. But seeing Maria and the Captain together, it was crystal clear that the Captained returned Maria's feelings of love: from his body language as they spoke and laughed together to the way he looked adoringly at her.
And although the Reverend Mother couldn't hear their conversation, she sensed there was something more going on between them. Firstly, their serious and heated conversation where she watched the Captain pace back and forth almost in anger before Maria practically threw her wimple into his face, and then how only moments later the Captain comforted Maria as she broke down and cried.
But secondly, and most importantly, was the way Maria and the Captain kissed each other. The older woman frowned to herself. The kisses Maria and the Captain shared were not the sweet and innocent kisses that she might have expected, but they were the deep and passionate kisses of lovers.
The Reverend Mother had previously wondered whether there was a reason why Maria had refrained from telling her more about her relationship with the Captain. But now she knew. After seeing Maria and the Captain together, the Reverend Mother was almost certain that they were not only in love, but they were lovers, and she hoped and prayed that Maria wouldn't have to face the consequences of her actions.
A/N: Thanks everyone for all the reviews etc. I hope you have all enjoyed this latest chapter. Please review! Thanks!