.

.

Things got weird.

Not in a good sense. Definitely not in a good fucking sense because holy Christ if anything was decently normal around here I wouldn't have the wear a bucket because of two fucking toads that didn't cooperate. Fidget was already a time bomb, but now I had the blue amphibian of mucus death to deal with as well.

Timmy graciously dubbed him Rainy.

Don't get me started on my blonde counterpart. The kid was fun to hang out with if only to appease my heathen mother in proving that I was indeed sociable and had a friend. But he quickly became as annoying as his frogs when it came to my lazy time. He had no off button.

(This had nothing to do with my growing resentment of his love for the twins)

(Absolutely nothing)

(…)

I wish I could say the twins went back to beating the shit out of each other, my parents went back to avoiding each other, and Timmy went back to being annoying. If there was one thing I didn't pride myself on being naïve about, is a determined Timmy and a heap ton of problems involving two red heads.

.

.

My first clue that something was universally fucked was Phila walking into my room with Fidget on her head. I doubt anyone could blame me for the girly shriek that came out of my mouth. Not to mention the huge net in her hand. The hooks on it said she'd borrowed it from our local fisherman. To me it seemed like she was ready to murder me and hide the body.

"I didn't do it!" I immediately jumped on my bed, denial flying out my mouth faster than I could comprehend the situation. "Whatever it was, Apha did it!"

"Shut up." Her deadpan expression had me relaxing a bit. Not entirely. Alarms were ringing in my ears because I was positive this was the first time anyone but my mother or Timmy was in my room. "Come out back, your friends here."

"But he has lessons?" I asked, mostly to myself. Timmy had private etiquette lessons on weekdays. While my mother managed mine just fine on her own, Timmy was a toddler with combustible energy and his aunt can't handle bombs. Which didn't explain why he was here.

I was still freaking out about Fidget on her head. Did she even know?

I hesitated at my doorway, hearing her footsteps down the stairs fading. Mom was out with friends and dad was at work, as usual. I wasn't expecting anything different, other than mom being late to my lessons. This was already bewildering.

I found myself out back, the sun lowering itself to touch the city chapel in the distance. It wasn't quite late enough to be sunset, but late enough that it was weird for any sort of activity. The twins stood atop their usual training spot, looking idle and bored. Between them, with flailing limbs and too many frogs, was Timmy. His shouts of glee were having me grimacing in doubt.

I was spotted before I could change my mind. Timmy sealed my fate by yelling, "Aiden! I have a surprise for you!" And then proceeding to trip and tumble down the hill, eating as much of the ground as he could. I stared blankly as he reached the bottom, giggling and coughing.

"Aiden!" He stumbled up to me, hooking his arm through mine in the universally 'you're doomed to be my hostage no matter how many frogs are in my pockets' hold. "We're going to play a game with the twins!"

I blanched, immediately digging my feet into the hill before we could start ascending, "Uh, no, I was doing work-"

"Boring!" Timmy stuck his tongue out at me and I dearly couldn't wait for him to grow up so I could slug him in the gut. "C'mon, we have a really fun game planned."

I swallowed the whimper in my throat and let myself be dragged up, though not without some resistance. The twins were still there, though Apha was sitting on a hay bale now and Phila was looking into Timmy's frog bucket. They still looked like they'd rather be throwing punches. I sympathized.

"We're all here!" Timmy hooted, dragging me to the center. "Aiden, the twins are gonna teach us how to play with sticks."

I barely stopped the need to scoff. It sounded dull and something we'd done a long time ago when we were younger. I didn't much care for that though. Feeling the pressure of the twin's gazes for, what, the third time in my life? It was unnerving. I shrunk my shoulders and scuffed my feet, mumbling an 'okay'.

"Great." Apha clapped her hands, nearly making me shriek at the suddenness. She moved off the hay bale with less gracefulness then any female her age. Somewhere mom was clutching her chest in agony. Apha picked up- those aren't sticks Timmy what the fuck- two chipped wooden swords, and improvised dinner plates with thatch wrapped around them.

"Here." Phila carefully handed Timmy his, who was shaking in so much excitement I knew he'd end up dropping them more than once. She turned to me and I had to stop myself from taking a step back. The twins had always been intimidating. Even just one without the other, they were ginormous compared to my toddler stature. She kneeled down to my height, holding out the sword and 'shield'. Everything inside me screamed to duck away.

"Thanks." I mumbled, slowly taking them from her. Her expression didn't change as she stood and walked over to the training dummies. We followed her, Timmy much more excited than me. Apha hovered behind us, arms crossed and permanently sealing away any escape attempts.

"It's simple." Phila started, hefting her own very real and deadly sword up to the training dummy. Hysterically, I wondered the merits of teaching Timmy how to use sharp pointy things, but decided the situation was already a cluster fuck. "Mimic me, kids. Right foot forward, left foot parted. See?"

She demonstrated. Awkwardly, we followed suit. Apha tutted behind us and nudged my left leg further to the side with her own foot. She straightened Timmy's shoulders with a small flick. Phila moved her sword forward, in a position frighteningly familiar to any attack position I'd ever seen, in this life and on a computer screen.

"Your opponents are always going to be different sizes." She said. "No matter what, keep your sword level with your torso. Any lower or higher and you won't have the power to strike."

"Cool." Timmy awed, looking down at his sword like his own personal nuke was in his hands.

She ran through a few more positions, never actually striking the training dummy. We learned the Faux stance, a loose fitting position that was easy to feint out your opponent. Timmy was fond of using the Shield kata, left arm hooked forward with a dingy dinner plate to take any damage. In front of a training dummy, he looked ridiculous. Being lazy, I made my home in the Strike pose, sword extended similar to how Phila had showed us. I didn't particularly admire anything wearing down my left arm and ditched the shield for a two hands on the hilt.

We went through the kata's for a few hours. It was weird, seeing the twins both patient and studious towards us. A warm feeling bubbled in my chest, seeing half smiles and Timmy's excited grin. Being gloomy was hard around this atmosphere.

It felt wrong.

I've been alive six years. I thought as we helped pick up the training area. You've never acknowledged me before. What the hell did Timmy do that I haven't already?

I tried not to simmer on those thoughts. It was stressfully hard with Timmy shadowing the twins, babbling and singing praises. The twins didn't seem to care, offering their attention when needed and nodding in reassurance. For a moment, I could picture myself as the guest in this home and Timmy as their little brother.

Shut up, I weakly swatted the thoughts away, just shut up.

"That was fun!" Timmy beamed as we trotted back inside, the twins staying behind for practice. "We should do that again."

"Yeah." I mumbled, ready for the day to end. "Sure."