DISCLAIMER: She owns them, but we have more fun with them!

A/N: So glad everyone enjoyed their little Valentine's surprise...thank you for all the reviews that came in on the last chapter...even though you greedy whores just asked for more! LOL. This one is a little longer than normal, but hopefully will answer some of your questions?

Oh...and we had to share this review...cause it made us laugh...hard. You've got to love autocorrect~

Thank you for the extra update!

I loved this glad the boys got some time without the annoyance that is maggot

(I mean maggie but my phone changed it...I think appropriately too!)

Chapter 6

MPOV *gag*

I'm a Barbie girl in the Barbie world

Life in plastic, it's fantastic

You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere

Imagination, life is your creation

Come on, Barbie, let's go party

I'm a Barbie girl in the Barbie world

Life in plastic, it's fantastic

You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere

Imagination, life is your creation

I'm a blonde single girl in the fantasy world

Dress me up, make your time, I'm your dolly

You're my doll, rock 'n' roll, feel the glamor and pain

Kiss me here, touch me there, hanky panky

I applied my shocking pink, with added glitter, lipstick in the compact mirror as I stood outside Edward's store, the song I'd been listening to in the car still bouncing around in my head.

Mmm, Edward.

Swoon or what!

And I knew he liked me too.

I wasn't stupid you know, like, I saw the way he looked at me and winked.

And I think since Jasper wasn't with me today, he would, like, do something, ya know?

I jumped at the chance to get to the store without him around because I was hoping that Edward and I could, like, have some fun.

I knew I should have felt bad for Jasper, but I just didn't.

He made my skin, like, crawl.

I mean, like, he's nice to look at and all, but he just fumbles around with me.

If I didn't know any better, I would have thought he was, like, gay or like, totally allergic to vaginas or something.

Like, that was a silly thought of course, because he, like, fucked me and stuff.

And he must have liked it because he came.

I didn't, but Edward soon got that sorted out for me.

Edward.

That man was like sex on fucking legs and I just knew that we could get up to, like, stuff.

And I was only with Jasper for one thing, and that was not, like, sex.

I wanted his family, his money. Like, ya know?

Momma always said to use myself to the best of my ability, so I got, like, proper friendly and such with his momma and now me and him are, like, getting married.

As soon as his parents kick the bucket, which shouldn't be too long looking at how old they are, we would be quids in and I could, like, divorce his ass.

So I have Jasper for money and, like, hopefully Edward for the sex and fun times.

Win win I say.

EPOV

Maggie came in just after five today and I decided to call it Operation Go-Ho.

Ooo, I liked the sound of that.

Okay, so she wasn't a whore or anything, but I needed a name and that came to mind.

After Jasper left with her new toy, the string of customers had continued, leaving me with a severe case of blue balls because I couldn't take five fucking minutes to myself.

I was not in the mood to play nice.

So, with the Mission Impossible theme tune running through my head, I began thinking of a way to get Maggie out of Jasper's life.

"Maggie, how good to see you!" I said in an overly enthusiastic tone as she walked in. She gave me a little blush as she walked over to me.

What the fuck was she wearing? 80's Barbie went out of fashion years ago.

It also didn't help that her wild red hair clashed with the pink.

Damn, she was so fucking ugly, when she fell out of the ugly tree, she hit every branch on the way down.

"Hi, Edward," she said shyly.

Oh, maybe this will be easier than I thought.

"I had Jasper in the store today," in more ways than one, I thought, "and he told me about the idea he had," I said as I walked her round the store.

I placed my hand on the small of her back to gently guide her round and I was zapped with a static shock.

Damn woman, did you know that polyester went out in the 80's? Cotton, wear fucking cotton!

"Yeah, he, like, totally wants us to buy something for each other. What did he get me?" she said in a hopeful tone that I was happy to expel.

Thank fuck she didn't mention the electric shock.

I knew how women could be about that.

Some men too, believe it or not.

It was a connection… it was meant to be…

Hell no, it was cheap clothes and carpet tiles.

They don't go well together.

"I'm not going to tell you that," I chuckled lightly as I thought about her power walking around the block in a shell suit.

"That's not fair," she tried to pout sexily but it looked like a bulldog licking piss off stinging nettles.

Hopefully she will be so out of it by her own orgasm, she won't even care about Jasper, or notice him leaving.

"Would you like me to call up Jasper after you get him something and tell him? It would even out the score," and give me a chance to try out phone sex with him, I thought silently.

"No!" she gasped as she continued to look around.

"Did you have anything in mind?" I asked, almost afraid to see what she might have come up with.

"Not really, I didn't think there were, like, many toys for men, but you've proven me wrong on that," she giggled in a way that should have sounded sensual but she sounded like a squeaky bicycle wheel crossed with a sea lion.

"Oh there are lots of things that men like. Rings, clamps, beads, probes," I could have listed a shitload more but she paled and looked like she was going to faint.

"Probes?" she squeaked out.

"Oh yeah, you see, men also have a little pleasure button inside that's similar to a woman's g-spot and when that's stimulated, it makes us rock hard and so turned on," I all but groaned out as I thought about playing with Jasper's after slipping a vibrating ring over his cock.

Mmm, licking his ass... biting down on the soft flesh as I inserted a new toy to make him squirm... gently pulling his ball sack as I sucked hard on him...

"Oh I don't know if I could, like, do anything like that," she mumbled, blushing brightly. Of course you couldn't, you cow. That would mean paying attention to someone else's needs for once.

"That's the beauty of it, you don't have to do anything, just lay back and enjoy what he can give you. Just think of him being harder than you've ever imagined him, fucking you hard and knowing that he is getting so much pleasure as well," I whispered dreamily as I thought about his ass thrusting back into me and vice versa.

"Do you like it?" she matched my whispering tone.

Hook.

"Oh yeah, I love having things in my ass," I smirked as I thought more about him.

I also didn't let on that I was gay. Though, how Red hadn't figured it out yet, I couldn't be sure. I mean come on, I wasn't exactly what you would call subtle.

Saying that, I think she must have been the only woman in the city who had a minus IQ score.

"So what would you, like, suggest?" she asked quietly.

Line.

"Definitely this," I said as I reached towards the toy that Jasper had grabbed earlier.

"Can I at least, like, have it in pink to, like, match the décor of the room?"

And sinker.

"Of course you can." I so wanted to roll my eyes.

JPOV

I was floating all the way back to work.

If I was being honest with myself, if you'd given me an umbrella, I'd be fuckin' Mary Poppins in the fuckin' clouds.

Edward had seriously screwed with my head.

Oh and before I do get all befuddled and flustered with thoughts of Edward, I got Maggie a Hitachi vibrator wand contraption thing with a fuckton of different attachments.

In pink.

Knowing her she would get her Bedazzler on it later so she can make it 'hers'.

I didn't give a shit really, but the further she was from me, the safer I would feel.

The rest of the day went by smoothly and I even had time to knock one out while on a break.

Damn Edward and his cock blocking skills.

And those damn lips.

And his hands.

Also, let's not forget the fucking bar in his tongue.

God, I could not wait for the day when I would feel that elsewhere.

And it would come, the day would come when we both shared our deep love for ass.

I had just one little concern… Maggie. I felt guilty that I now knew there was no way I could go through with this marriage thing. Not with her anyways. Mom was going to be heartbroken and I knew that was going to eat at me. I just went with it because I didn't really think it would matter to me, didn't think I would ever find what I really wanted.

And I felt like I owed it to them for taking me in...not turning me over to the system.

Yes, I needed to end things with her, but more importantly, Edward said that he had a way of helping me to do that.

He just wouldn't tell me.

I was slightly nervous by the time I got home at just gone seven.

Don't judge me; you'd feel nervous too if you had to face what I had to every day.

Maggie was already home and I wondered what Edward had sold her.

I did beg him not to let her get something too much in the way of 'couple' touching and he readily promised me. He didn't like the idea of my having to touch her any more than I did.

I just dreaded to think what she had gotten me. Let's face it, Edward was a great salesman, but Maggie, well, she was as stubborn as they came.

This is the woman who taped down the toilet seat, got an automatic toothpaste dispenser and banned me from shaving over the sink because she wanted a pristine bathroom in MY home!

I noticed straight away that it was eerily quiet in the house and that she wasn't downstairs, so with the bag in my hand, I made my way up to our room.

She had only moved in a few weeks ago and it was already a sickening shade of Barbie pink with bedding to match.

And when I say bedding, I meant killer sheets, and not in a good way.

Honestly, when has satin ever been sexy? You slide into one side of the bed and right out the other side. And let's not forget how you wake up in the night because the pillows you were resting your head on were now on the floor!

"In here, baby," she called out as I reached the top step.

How the fuck did she do that?

Freaky bloody women.

I found her in the bedroom, in just her black lace thong, sitting on the bed.

Hurl.

Honestly, I really needed to talk to her and my parents; I couldn't go through with this.

Not after kissing and dry humping Edward today, no way.

I wanted him.

I needed him.

I wanted to fuck him.

I wanted him to fuck me.

I wanted to feel his steel hard cock in me.

His fingers digging into my skin.

His hot breath fanning over me.

Just as I put the bag down on the bed, I got a text.

Make her cum over and over, then when she's asleep, call me. E

A/N: This is where we duck and hide and tell you we'll see you next Monday! Of course, leaving love might get you a sneak peek at next week's chapter…