There was a knock at the door to Elsa's study. "Come in," she said, and set aside the books and documents she'd been flipping through.
It was the servant, Nils. He bowed quickly. "Beg your pardon, Your Majesty."
"I'm not ready for dinner yet, come back in half an hour."
"It's the Royal Icemaster, ma'am. He requests an audience."
Oh dear lord in heaven. "Tell him… Tell him I'll see him in the outer office in a minute or two." Did he suspect? Did I make a noise? Does he know?
"Yes, ma'am." He left.
Nervous, she hoisted a couple of heavy cast-iron weights she had borrowed and discharged cold into them. I have to stop second-guessing myself. He knows what he knows. We'll just see what happens.She set them down gently so they wouldn't shatter, took a deep breath, and went out to meet Kristoff face to face.
Kristoff shuffled back and forth as he waited for Elsa to come out. Before he met Anna he'd never had any use for aristocracy and upper classes, except maybe Grand Pabble. Now he was sure, almost completely sure, he was in love with Anna. The queen was her sister, so he had to get along with Elsa somehow. There was no doubt she'd been very grateful to him for helping Anna, and she'd been good to him with the new sleigh and official job and everything. All the same, if Anna wasn't there, being around Elsa made him feel about as cultured and elegant as Sven. Worse, it made him feel bad about it. It wasn't anything Elsa was doing. She'd never been less than civil with him. It was just who she was, and even though he knew he was being stupid and unfair he still resented it.
Elsa glided into the room and swept smoothly into her chair. "Kristoff," she said, nodding to him.
He bowed. "Elsa." He grabbed the back of a chair, spun it around, and sat on it backwards with his legs straddling the seat back.
Even if she hadn't been feeling ashamed and scared and jealous, Kristoff still made Elsa feel awkward. She would always be indebted to him for looking out for Anna. Would she even have a sister if he hadn't helped her on the North Mountain? And for Anna's sake, since he was her boyfriend — correction: lover — Elsa needed to be friendly with him. But she knew so little about him or his life that, without Anna there, she didn't know how to talk with him, or even be around him.
"So. What brings you here today? To my office?"
He rested his arms on the chair back. It creaked under his weight. "How are you doing?"
"Quite well, thank you. Now, your business?" Too brusque.
"Um. That was my business. Is my business. I mean, Anna wants to know how you're doing. She sent me here to find out. How you're doing."
Elsa looked out the window. "I think I have an idea of how much Anna cares about me and my well-being."
"No, you don't." Oh damn, wrong way to talk to a queen. "She's mad at you. Furious. I haven't seen her this angry since she punched Hans in the face." And that's not helping.
Elsa's expression was impassive as she waited for Kristoff to finish hanging himself.
"But she wouldn't be that upset if she didn't care. She's worried about you, and she wants to know what you were thinking, and how you are, and if you're okay."
"You can tell her for me that I'm deeply sorry for offending her, and I hope she can come to forgive me."
His hands gripped the seat back. "Listen, I'm not here to tell you what she said, or tell her what you said back. I'm not a messenger boy. She sent me to see how you are, and I'm going to tell her what I see, and that's it."
She looked at his large hands, remembered where they must have been, what they must have been doing. She thought about what she'd overheard about men with large hands or large feet, but she also remembered what Mama had said, that a man may be big but he might not be big all over. She could never be him, she could never be anything like him. If that's what Anna wanted, things were even more hopeless than before.
"Elsa?"
She sat up, looked at him steadily. "As I said, I'm quite well, thank you." God, how I wish that were true. "I appreciate your taking an interest, but I don't know how else to help you."
He closed his eyes in frustration, then faced her again. "Listen. I don't know what's going on with you two. There's stuff Anna just can't tell me."
Thank god, thought Elsa.
"But I don't really need to know. I know Anna, and I sort of know you, and I know what you're like together. The way you're supposed to be. And it's not like this. I don't know what it is, I don't care what it is, just fix it."
Elsa's poise dropped away. "I want to. I can't. And I don't know how. I've done some things I shouldn't have, and I just want to make things right between us, but things keep getting worse." She hated him for having what she wanted. She loved him for making Anna happy. She had nothing in common with him. And now she was pleading with him. "Help me, Kristoff. Anything you can do. Please."
"I, um, okay." Reindeer do not make life this complicated. Neither do trolls. He pushed himself up from the chair and headed for the door.
"Kristoff? Can you tell me what you're going to say to her?"
"I'm going to tell her what I see. You're not mean, and you're not crazy, but you're not doing so good."
"Kristoff? Please. How is she?"
"She has her good days, and I try to help, but she's not doing so good either." He headed for the stables to talk with Sven. He needed a break from people.
Elsa heard a familiar quiet knock at her study door. Thank goodness. I need this. She stopped pacing, sat at her desk, and said, "Come in."
Ingrid entered, carrying a tray, and curtsied carefully. "Good afternoon, Your Majesty. I have the tea and pastries you sent for." The kitchen staff weren't shorthanded. She wondered why Elsa had her serving food.
"Very good. You can set them up on the desk, next to the board."
Ingrid was puzzled when she saw the board was set up. She set out the tea service and the two small plates of pastries. Elsa was obviously expecting someone. If she and Ingrid played a game, or even a half-game, the tea would be cold by the time Elsa's guest would arrive. Was Elsa going to dismiss her and play against someone else today? Ingrid stood by the end of the desk with the empty tray.
Elsa waved at a side table. "Set the tray there and sit down." One dish was petit-fours glacé, the other pieces of kransekake. Elsa swapped back and forth so there was a mix on each dish and pulled one plate towards herself. "Starting with black, as usual?"
Ingrid nodded. Should she have served Elsa a cup? Ingrid couldn't bring herself to ask, and Elsa hadn't said. To Ingrid's shame Elsa poured for herself, then she made her opening move and sampled a petit-four.
Ingrid focused on the game. Elsa nibbled as she played. After a few moves back and forth Elsa asked, "Do you like pastries, Ingrid?"
She nodded.
Elsa pushed the other dish closer to Ingrid. "Well I can't eat these all myself, you know."
Ingrid thought she knew what was happening, but it was so far outside the way things were done that she needed to be sure. "They're not for someone else."
"They're for you, of course."
"Oh." Of course!? She looked at the dish, the board, glanced at Elsa, looked at the dish again. She was the guest Elsa was expecting. She was a guest. She had to behave like it. Sit like a cat, not like a mouse. She sat up, helped herself to some kransekake, and moved her piece. Proud of herself, she took the other cup and poured herself some tea. Then she glanced up to see if Elsa was looking. She was, and to Ingrid's relief she wasn't upset. She was even smiling a little.
Ingrid sipped her tea. It was hot; a good sign. The game went on. The fondant on the petit-fours was too sugary for Ingrid, but the kransekake was very good.
A little while later Elsa said, "I have a board that An— that I used to play with. It's in very good shape, practically new. I thought you might like it if we used that one."
Ingrid was unsettled."She's being nice to me. Why?"
"I've been taking you away from your work a lot lately."
"I've been keeping up. I'm not behind."
Elsa gently shook her head. "No, it's not that. I feel like I've been imposing on you lately, bringing you here so often."
"It's not an imposition to do my job."
The smile drained from Elsa's face, leaving it empty. "I see." She bent her head over the board.
This was unfamiliar territory to Ingrid, and it took her a little while to process. Her eyes widened with realization. "She doesn't know I want to be here. She— " Ingrid blinked, swallowed, then sat up like a cat and looked directly at Elsa. "You need to know. I like spending time with you. I like being with you. You've always been considerate and thoughtful to me. You don't get anxious if we're together and we don't say anything. I don't know what it's like for you, but I don't have much of that in my life. I enjoy being here."
"Even when you were scared?"
"I'm still scared. I'm scared now."
"Of what?"
"Letting you down. Still, these sessions are the most content and comfortable I've been since before I left home. When they're done I'm going to miss them. You don't have to give me cakes. I'm…" She stopped, searched for the right word. "I'm happy."
"What do you mean, 'when they're done'?"
Being bold enough to say these things was making Ingrid light-headed. "You love your sister and you will get back together again, I know it. Then you won't need me anymore. And even though I enjoy these sessions I would never want your reunion to be delayed. I hope it happens for you soon, as soon as possible. And when it does I won't have regrets. I will have nothing but gratitude for this. But I will miss…" She looked down again, and her voice faded. "…you."
Elsa wanted to comfort her, tell her it wouldn't be like that. She almost did. But she couldn't deny what Ingrid had said. These sessions were Elsa's way of coping, a bandage over the hole that Anna left behind. Once she and Anna were reunited — and Ingrid seemed confident of that — what room would there be for Ingrid in her life? Elsa tried to picture it and couldn't. Fond as she was of Ingrid — more fond than she realized — she still craved Anna more than anything. Anna was the sun, and the sun blotted out the stars. Elsa had never expected that any part of winning Anna's love could make her sad.
She touched Ingrid's hand. To Ingrid's credit she didn't jump back or even flinch. She just looked up into Elsa's eyes. Elsa said, "I'll miss you too." They sat for a moment. "Now drink your tea while it's hot."
They played, nibbled, sipped their tea. Ingrid made sure to pour for Elsa that time.
Elsa said, "I was talking before about the board I have in storage. Would you like me to get it for next time?"
"If you'd prefer."
"I asked what you want," Elsa said gently.
"I'd rather not, thank you. I played on this one with Anders, my younger brother. It reminds me of being with him."
"So you had a brother." Ingrid didn't say much about herself, and Elsa had never heard her talk about her family.
"I had five brothers and two sisters. The older ones worked in the fields. I helped Mama in the house and took care of Anders. Fed him, washed him, held him down. We played a lot of hnefatafl. He was very good."
Held him down? "He's the youngest?"
"He was. I am now."
The calmness in Ingrid's voice confused Elsa. She ran over the conversation in her head to make sure she understood what Ingrid had said. "Oh, God, I'm sorry. I'm very sorry for your loss."
"I apologize. I said too much. I shouldn't have mentioned it."
"No, it's all right." Elsa braced herself. "I've lost family, too. If you ever want to talk about it, it's okay." She remembered who she was talking to. "If you don't, that's okay, too."
"Thank you. Don't worry for me. I can't be sad for what I've lost. I have to be grateful for what I had."
Elsa tilted her head to one side as she looked at this odd, surprising girl. "You're very wise."
Ingrid paused, shook her head a little. "I'm sorry, I wasn't clear. It's not that I'm wise. I can't be sad. I have to be grateful. It's… Nothing else works." She shrugged, and returned her attention to the board.
Anna found Kristoff in the stables again. He was brushing Sven's fur and talking to himself.
"Kristoff! Where were you? You didn't come back after you talked with Elsa."
"I needed some reindeer-time. I'm sorry."
"How was she? How did she look? What did she say? What was she like?"
Kristoff took a deep breath, sighed heavily, and set down the grooming brush. "The more I hear about this stuff, the less I understand what's going on. And I know how much you talk about things — " He caught a look from her. " — not a criticism, that's just who you are — so if there's something you don't want to tell me you must have a good reason and I'm okay with that. But as angry as you are, you love her and you miss her. And whatever she did to you, she loves you and misses you, too. And no, she hasn't gone crazy or mean or weird."
He moved Sven's mouth and said, "Like he could tell," in that goofy voice.
As himself he said, "So whatever the thing is you can't tell me, I can't see how it could come out of nowhere and be that big a deal. But like I said, what do I know?"
"I'm sorry, Kristoff. I never should have put you in the middle of this. It must be really uncomfortable. But if you had only seen what Olaf was doing — "
"Olaf? What does he have to do with this?"
"He delivered the message. Anyway, he — "
"Olaf?"
"Yes. I said that. And he — "
"Not before."
"Are you sure?"
"Am I sure? I would remember that. If you told me, 'Elsa sent me a gross message, and I got it from Olaf', hell yeah I'd remember. That explains everything."
"What do you mean?"
"Hey, I like the little guy, and he was there for you when you were, you know, so that makes him my friend for life. But you've got to admit he's — "
"Be nice, Kristoff."
" — an idiot."
"I said, 'be nice.'"
"I was. I mean, from Elsa to Olaf to you. If something stupid and vulgar got in there, I don't think it's from you or Elsa."
"Olaf would never do anything like that."
"On purpose? No. Not on purpose? Like I said, he's — " She glared at him again. " — not as intelligent as you might like. But hey, this is good news!"
"Really?" she said, still scowling.
"What's better? Elsa being horrible or Olaf being…making a mistake? And what's easier to fix? I just wish you'd told me to begin with."
"I was really upset."
"I know. And I hate it when you are. So go find Olaf and stop being upset. Go fix!"
"Aren't you coming?"
"You'll have one clueless doofus to deal with, you don't need two."
"Oh, Kristoff, you are so not a doofus." She gave him a kiss and a warm hug. "Not right now, anyway." And she dashed off.