Benjamin Hotel Chronicles
Carlos and Sophie Wedding Part I
How to Love Someone Who is Broken
Gently, lay your hands on their soul like a whisper
And find the places in which they are broken.
Then love them until these fractured places
Become crevices, and the crevices become
Thin, white scars that they only just barely remember.
-Nikita Gill
November 1st, 1907 (quick a/n: no sex in this chapter, even though they do share a few steamy moments!)
Sophie looked up from her book as Carlos pulled out the washtub, taking a moment to admire his muscles flexing under his shirt. He'd been in the kitchen, banging around pots for a half an hour and she'd been ignoring it successfully until now. Now, she stared curiously at him as he straightened up and looked at her, his blue eyes sparkling in the dim light of the oil lamp as he appraised her silently for a moment, looking devastating with his top three buttons undone and his sleeves rolled up.
"Are you suggesting I smell, Carlos?" She teased lightly, dog earing the page she was on and closing the book.
He shook his head slightly, a lock of his obsidian hair falling onto his forehead where he flicked it away, "No, querida. I just wanted to do something for you."
Sophie felt her insides melt at his words and she scrambled to stand and cross the room to wrap her arms around her wicked, remorseful Spaniard. "You do too much for me, my love." She murmured, brushing her lips lightly against his.
His eyes hooded as he settled his arms around her, gazing at her with his eyes that contrasted sharply with his olive-toned face. She brushed her hand along his cheek, feeling the dark whiskers that were beginning to come in as he leaned his face into her palm, "It's never too much. It's never enough compared to what you've given me."
It was the other way around, she knew, but she'd gotten tired of arguing with him about who saved whom. "I adore your sweet words, love, but my curiosity wants to know what you're up to." He was always so serious, her Carlos, so she tried gentle humor to bring a smile to his impossibly sexy mouth.
Tilting his head, he leaned down to whisper soft words into her ear, causing goose pimples to break out along her skin as his voice got husky and impossibly low, his breath on her ear sending a shiver to the center of her being, "Undress, Sophia."
Her eyes closed as pleasure swept over her, loving the way he talked to her, treasured her. She opened her eyes so she could meet the gaze that was as steady as the man in front of her and slowly she began to unbutton her blouse, her fingers making quick work of her clothes as anticipation pooled in her belly.
He stepped back, giving her space and watching her with half-lidded eyes, the heat of his gaze sending a red flush over her skin as she slipped her skirt down and was left in nothing but her chemise. It was inappropriate for a young lady not to wear a corset, but since Sophie was already an unwed young woman living with a dangerous man, she tended to shirk convention. Plus, the corset was downright suffocating and she couldn't stand the restrained feeling. She needed freedom and it was a bonus that Carlos loved how quickly he could undress her.
She grinned as she shed the remaining clothes, feeling wanted and seductive. Stepping towards him, she reached out for him but he surprised her by sidestepping her touch. He tsked at her, "No, no." He murmured, his accent thicker with the desire that was alight in his eyes, "Sophia, you don't get to touch. I get to touch."
Her lips immediately drew into a pout, not liking this direction of events. "That's not fair."
Carlos chuckled, "Stay here. I'm going to bring the water in and bathe you."
She folded her arms across her chest, the chilliness of the apartment getting to her. It was November, after all. "I don't need bathed, I'm not a child." She told him, not really understanding what had gotten into him. They should be going to bed early; they were getting married tomorrow and they were supposed to be there early, before church services started.
"Querida." He said, stepping closer to her, "Let me do this for you? I promise you'll enjoy it."
She sighed, relenting to his earnestness, and watched as he hurried to the kitchen to grab the water he must have been heating up while she read. He set them down next to the washtub and then hurried back for something else. Sophie moved to pick one up, to begin pouring the water in, but he called out, "No, Sophia. Let me do everything. Don't lift a finger." Followed by a strange 'pop' noise.
This time, she let out a frustrated sigh, "I'm getting cold." She muttered as he brought in a glass and a bottle of champagne that was still smoking a bit from the pop of the cork.
"This will warm you." He replied, pouring the champagne into the glass and handing it to her. The rose color of it sparkled in the crystal glass as she reached out to take it from him.
She'd never had champagne before, but she liked the bubbles that tickled her upper lip as she took a tentative sip. It was sweet, bubbly, and it did send a shot of warmth through her despite the fact that it was chilled. "Oh my." She said, looking up at Carlos, "Why don't we have champagne more?"
He grinned, setting the bottle down so he could begin filling the tub, "Champagne is for toasts, for celebration. I figured we should celebrate tonight, together, before we celebrate with witnesses tomorrow."
She laughed, "Friends, Carlos. They're our friends."
He paused to look up at her as he dumped a second pot of hot water in the tub, that stubborn lock falling across his forehead once more, "Right. Friends." He looked vulnerable for a second and she couldn't stop her hand from reaching out to touch his cheek. It had taken a lot for her to convince him to give the Benjamin men a chance to become his friends. He was so used to being on the outside of everything, peering in, but Sophie couldn't live like that. After their reconciliation in the summer, she'd started inviting Race, Clara, Jack, and Hazel over for dinner, who in turned began to invite her and Carlos into the fold of friends on Sunday and Monday night dinners. Slowly, Race forgave Carlos for the past, for what happened to Snipeshooter, and while Carlos was still treated a tad wearily-how he liked it, she was sure-it had given her a chance to make her own friends.
It was really Eli who'd helped Sophie. After she moved back home, Carlos told her he wanted to invite Eli and his family over for dinner, to make up for his drunken blunders the night they'd broken up, and to introduce her to one of the few men he considered a true friend. They were only in town for another ten days and Sophie was excited to meet them.
Rosie had fallen asleep on Sophie after dinner, the two of them together on the couch while JoAnna and Carlos reminisced about his mother in the kitchen. Eli wandered over to her, his bright, blue eyes softening as they alighted on Rosie fast asleep. The adoration for the little girl so endearing on such a big man, Sophie decided she liked him very much. She'd met her share of large brutes in Chicago, who didn't hesitate to use their strength to hurt those smaller than them, that it was a nice surprise to meet Eli. A gentle giant of a man, who spoke soft, stuttered words and was more compassionate than all the men of Chicago.
"I ssseee wwwhy he loves yyyyou…" He murmured, crouching down beside the couch so she could hear his whispered words.
She tilted her head at him, inquiringly, "Because kids like me?" She teased, her eyes falling to the little girl and she felt a touch of envy. She always knew she wanted to be a mother, but she wasn't around many children besides Hazel. Didn't know if she was any good with them, thought Hazel was a fluke because the little girl didn't have many female role models.
She imagined her and Carlos' kids. Little boys that looked like their father, running around being hellions. Imagined Carlos giving them piggy back rides and cleaning skinned knees, and teaching them how to throw a punch. She smiled to herself before she realized Eli was watching her carefully, the way Carlos watched people, and she felt like he knew the direction her thoughts turned.
"He nnnneeds a lit-tle mmmore light. He's llllived in the sssshadows too long."
She felt the corner of her mouth tilt up in a grim half-smile, "I know. I'm trying. I don't know many people here besides Jack. He barely tolerates him because that's who I stayed with when we got into that big fight." She shook her head, frustrated, "He just doesn't play well with others."
Eli smiled bashfully, "Dddon't I kkkknow it."
They both froze as Rosie shifted in Sophie's arms, mumbling incoherently and settling down with her head on the blonde woman's shoulder, face buried in her hair. "I don't know how you let her out of your sight." Sophie told Eli in a low whisper, her heart aching at the thought of any harm befalling the child.
"A-ask Jo. I dddon't." He grinned, his gemstone-like eyes on his little girl for a moment before he met Sophie's eyes once more, "I t-ttthink the bbbest wwway to g-get to Llllos is tttthrough R-race."
She winced, knowing Race was kind of a sore spot for Carlos, too, given her old feelings for the Italian. "You think?" She asked, to which he nodded, "Well, maybe. I hope so. Sometimes I feel like he looks at Race and sees me crying over him." She dipped her head in embarrassment, "We met in Chicago, when Race went to retrieve Jack. I cried about him being married. It was silly."
"Nnno. It's nnnot." Eli interjected, shaking his head.
She shrugged her free shoulder, "Perhaps not. Race kind of accidentally brought us together. I like him for that. But, I told Carlos is was nothing more than infatuation. He knows it's nothing more."
"Invvvvite Rrrrace and C-c-.." He paused, always frustrated with that 'ka' syllable, "Llllara ovvvver. Tttttell Llllos he ssssshouldn't llllock y-yyou up."
Eli's wise words gave Sophie food for thought, and the confidence to confront Carlos. All this time she'd been living with him, he'd kept her to himself. It wasn't done intentionally, she knew, but as someone with very few friends, he didn't realize what harm he'd done keeping her cooped up in the apartment. She wasn't like Carlos, she needed people, needed women she could trust and joke with, friends she could rely on if things got a little rough. Eli was right, she couldn't be locked up, so the next day she told the brooding Spaniard she was inviting friends over. Clara and Race.
To which he'd grudgingly agreed to. She hadn't realized before the level of persuasion she held over him and since then, she'd tested it. Dragging him to the dinners, having Hazel stay over a few times, and even Clara over one night when Race was working a night shift and she was upset over her miscarriage. He'd come home from work that night to find both of them crying, his face paling considerably before he tried to awkwardly cheer them both up by procuring a box of chocolates made by Vivian that he'd bought but hadn't yet given to Sophie.
"Get in before it gets cold, Chiquita." He murmured in her ear, pulling her from memories of the last few months and she was surprised to see he was standing up, right by her and peering down at her with an eagerness that surprised her.
She handed him her glass and took his free hand, dipping a toe in to check the temperature. It was hot, but not scalding. It was perfect. Slowly, she slid in, Carlos steadying her with his hand, and once she was settled, he put her glass of champagne back in her hand and moved to grab the wash cloth and mint soap she favored. "Carlos?" She asked, sipping her delicious, bubbly drink and beginning to relax as he turned back to her. He dipped the cloth into the water and then lathered the soap bar onto, looking at her expectantly, "Do you want children?"
This long together and they'd never brought up children, she hoped he wouldn't be upset with her. She found it hard to ask such a question, unsure because he'd never shown much affection to Hazel or Mush and Viv's little boy. "Oh, sí, querida. A whole army of them." He told her, running the wash cloth over her arm and gathering her blonde hair so he could clean her shoulders and back. Her eyes fluttered shut when he couldn't help but lay a few, soft kisses along her neck, knowing it was one of her favorite spots.
"An army?" She exclaimed, dramatically, smiling as he grinned and kept dutifully cleaning her. The aroma of the fresh bite of mint soap filled the room and she inhaled it mixed with Carlos' spicy musk as he leaned over her.
He moved down, sweeping the cloth over her breasts before continuing farther south. The warmth of the water, his soft touch, and the champagne made her close her eyes and moan softly as she leaned back and dipped her hair into the water. She raised her head as Carlos moved down one leg and back up the other, "A whole bunch of niños." He mumbled, still smiling ever so slightly as he glanced over at her, "With your eyes and smile."
She sighed as he rung out the wash cloth and placed it on the side of the washtub, "I want children, too. I don't know about a whole army of them, though."
He paused, considering her, before he dipped his hand in the water and stroked her center, causing her to gasp and nearly drop her glass. "Careful." He told her, wrapping his free hand around the one holding the glass, "Have another sip." His light encouragement made her tingly as did the hand between her legs.
Slowly, she lifted the glass to her lips, sipping and holding the bubbles in her mouth before swallowing. That gave her an idea and she took another sip and leaned up to kiss him, letting him taste the champagne on her lips. He groaned against her lips before flicking the little part of her that had her gasping, her mouth opening so he could take full advantage, swirling his tongue along her mouth.
Carlos pulled away, looking like he was grappling for some self-control though she couldn't say why, "Carlos." She whispered, her voice full of need.
"Sophie." He replied, frustrated, "I'm trying to bathe you. Don't distract me. Now, let me wash your hair, mi amor."
Grumpily, she sat up so he could reach all of her long, blonde hair but the grumpiness faded as he massaged her head with the soap and ran his fingers through her hair. She all but purred in contentment, eyes closing as she leisurely sipped her champagne until her glass was empty. She set the glass beside the tub and sighed as he rinsed her hair with warm water.
Once he was satisfied she was clean, he gently massaged her shoulders before going to fetch a towel. They didn't speak in this time, the silence comforting without words to fill it, their touches and gaze enough communication. She stood as he came back and he wrapped her up in the towel, smoothing it over her skin to dry her before picking her up and carrying her to the bedroom.
So relaxed from the bath and the champagne, she felt her eyelids grow heavy and was surprised when he didn't crawl in beside her. He slid her under the blankets, tucking the quilt around her and she reached out to catch his hand, "Where are you going?" She asked sleepily.
He leaned down to rub his nose lightly against hers, just barely brushing his lips against hers before replying, "I'm going to go bathe now, querida."
"Oh." The disappointment brought out a chuckle from him and she scowled, "What? I can't promise I'll be awake when you're done."
Carlos smoothed her hair back and kissed her forehead, "That's alright, I wanted to take care of you before myself. Dulces sueños." Sweet dreams. She felt her eyelids flutter shut and she drifted off, too relaxed to keep them open any longer.
The bed dipping with his weight woke her up and she immediately snuggled up against him, inhaling his scent and reveling in the feel of his skin against hers. He kissed her softly, "Children with your eyes and smile." He murmured, "Seven, no, nine. All little girls."
She chuckled at his whisperings, "I want a boy or two." She told him sleepily.
"Alright. Two of each and then we'll discuss more."
"I love you."
"Te amo mas que todo." I love you more than everything, he purred into her ear and she fell asleep to his soft, Spanish words, wrapped up in his strong arms and feeling more relaxed than she'd ever felt before.