Hye! So my sister is always ripping on me about how I 'talk to myself' which I don't by the way, and then I'm all, 'That's soo Emmett!' Lol. This is my first time writing in EmPOV so yeah...I took a quiz and it said I was most like him. But it was before I even published this. So this is really all how I would act, with some stuff that Emmett would say. Woo!

Disclaimer:I don't own Twilight, a Mercedes, Emmett's mind, Edward's Volvo, the phrase 'IDK', Conway Twitty, or Family Guy.

EmPOV

I hated when this happened. It was unavoidable, and it always knew exactly when to pop up, at precisely the wrong time. Always. It's like, when what's-his-face turns into the Hulk or something. Ha. He's green. But that's not the point. It always seems to happen at very important, random times. Like, when Esme is lecturing me on how 'A clean home is a happy home' or something.

You see, I tend to not be to conservative of my adoptive mother's prized possesion. 'What is her prized possesion?' you might be wondering. The answer? Obvious. Her home. If anything were to put her home in danger, she would be all over it like ants at a picnic.

So, one day, I was really hackin' bored, right? And it just so happened that I was 'confined to my home' for 'violating some house rule'. Perfect timing, huh? Anyway, I was on house arrest, so I had to make due with what I had, being the house. Poor house.

It all started like this. I was sitting in mine and Rosalie's room, school didn't matter much to Esme on this particular day, and there was only a limited amount of things to do.

I tried daydreaming, being as it may, I can't sleep. Yeah. Not so great. I felt crazy. Like, I was talking to myself. But not just talking, taunting;the voice in my head that was simalar to mine kept yelling 'HA! You big dunce. Now we're all cooped up in here without a damn thing to do! Thanks alot, Emmett!' I scoffed.

'Well, I don't think yelling at me is gonna help our sitiation, now is it?' Wow. I was talking to myself. Crazyy.

The voice in my head scoffed. 'Yeah, right. Then what is, you Maroon?' I was really getting tired of all the insults to my intelect I was throwing at myself.

I sighed deeply. 'I'm not sure. Esme made it her goal this afternoon to make sure I, I mean we, don't try to escape. She really went overboard, if you ask me.'

Yet again, the voice that was ringing in my ears scoffed in disagreement. 'What did you do now, Emmett.' the voice asked flatly, monotone.

I sighed more angrily. 'Idk.' The voice was about to say something, when it caught itself midsentence. 'Did you just say 'Idk?' Never mind. You must've done something. C'mon. Tell Ol' Emmy what Emmy did wrong.' the voice, me, cooed, as if talking to a child.

'I really don't find that nescasary.' I thought, aloud. The voice laughed, then snorted. 'Of course it's nescasary, Emmett.' it said, as if it was obvious, common knowledge. 'Now tell me.'

I clicked my tongue. 'Nope.' I was not about to give in to my head. I was stronger then myself. Wait, what? Eh. Anyway, I can beat this!

Another angry sigh. 'I don't see how this relationship is going to work unless we comunicate!' Geez. It sounded like my wife, or something. Rose did kinda sound like that...except she was wayyy hotter then that voice. Er, me, I guess. I was not gonna give up.

'What relationship? I'm freaking married! Goshers.' I yelled at myself, hoping it would shut the damn voice up. It was really grinding my gears. Like, seriously.

The voice gasped, as if a guilty verdict was just read for it's spouse. 'You don't..love me?' it choked out. Great. Now I'm crying because I don't love myself. That's just great. And, I think I'm going crazy.

It seemed like I was sighing alot that day. 'You know that's not what I meant.' There. Try to reason with it. Maybe it will see my peace offering and go away. For good. Hopefully.

'Oh, Emmett. I know exactly what you meant.' it yelled, outraged. This was gonna be a long day...

-Meanwhile-

EPOV

This was rich. Emmett was talking to himself, no, arguing with himself. It was the greatest form of entertainment ever! No television show or movie could compare to Emmett arguing with himself, and losing. That was in a category all it's own! It's own genre! Like, comedy and drama, mixed in with some bad humor. This was one of the only times I was happy to be able to read minds!

I walked away, unwillingly, to invite everyone to the show. Soon, me, Bella, Alice, Jasper, Carlisle, Esme, and Rosalie were outside his door, listening intently. It was a great bonding activity.

"I hate to tell ya this, Rose, but I think Emmett just offically lost his marbles." Bella said to Rosalie, followed by a laugh. It was true. Emmett had finally gone crazy. Rosalie just sighed. "I know." she agreed. Everyone told them to 'sssh', so soon the only sound was Emmett and Himself. Arguing. Rich. This was rich.

"I really don't find that nescasary." Emmett muttered. What was even funnier than him talking to himself was that there was always an answer. Like I said, rich!

Carlisle sighed. "I think we might have to commit dear Emmett to the psychiatric ward." he said, behind his joking tone was actual concern.

"...that's not what I meant." Emmett kept muttering to himself, so many times I lost track. Poor Emmett. I wonder how it felt like to go crazy.

Jasper chuckled. "I feel anger, and it's sweett." Alice laughed along with her husband, obviously agreeing. Everyone agreed, actually; I searched everyone's mind, and it kept back coming to 'Emmett's crazy.'

Another sigh came from Carlisle's direction. "Time to intervene." he whispered, whislt opening the door. Emmett was talking to air, screaming at it for no apparent reason. When he noticed us, he stopped. I bet if he could, he'd be blushing. "Please tell me you guys didn't hear that." he pleaded, embarrassed.

Alice shrugged. "Only everything." Emmett knew that we would definatally not be forgetting about this any century too soon. We should've taken a picture, then we could've put it in the family album.

Emmett scratched his head. "Boy, could I use a distraction. Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Conway Twitty." He said while looking to the right of us. Now he was crazy.

"Um, Emmett? Please get in the Mercedes. I need to do an emergency check-up on your IQ." Carlisle said, joking. Emmett looked down.

"Stupid Emmett." he muttered. "Hey!" his voice called from inside his head. We all heard it very clearly, that we looked at one another. I stole on last glance at my family, and we all backed up very, very slowly.

Lol. It was sooo much fun writing this chapter!! OK I WANNA SAY THANK YOU TO ALL THE PEOPLE WHO PM'ED ME AND TOLD ME THAT THIS STORY WAS GREAT! I LOVE READING YOUR E-MAILS! It makes me happy! I am very pleased to inform you that I a almost half way through with 'Breaking Dawn'! I have to admit, I wasn't to fond of it at first. I actually threw my book at the wall when I read some of it..but I am now apart of Team Edward & Team Jacob. I don't care if it's not allowed. I love this book! I was cracking up while reading this chappie! Oh yeah, usually my updates depend on what my idea is, how long it takes to write it, to type it up, to edit it, and to publish it. But you may or may have not noticed I don't update on weekends. I'm always busy. DER. You might not have, either. I might update tommorow, but more than likely not. Give me Tuesday, at the latest. Thanks! You guys FREAKING ROCK MY WORLD. Oh yeah I probably mis spelled some things but give me a break! It's 4 O'CLOCK IN THE MORNING! Don't ask why I update so late all the time. Please. GIVE ME IDEAS!! Please! I only have like, half, no, one-third of a chappie written up. If you want me to keep going really, really long with this story, I need ideas. THANK YOU! ILY!

-Lori-