Yugi looked down at the 5 tiny red pills in his hand. These 5 tiny red pills could
make the difference between getting his grandpa's cherished card back, or failing
his grandpa and their relationship being permanently strained. He knew that Mr. Moto
would forgive him, but Yugi also knew that he'd be a permanent reminder of his grandpa's loss. A cherished friend gave the card to his grandpa after an excavation in Egypt. Soon after,his friend perished from a disease. Not only is the Blue Eyes a superbly rare card, but
it's the last reminder of Mr. Moto's dear friend.
"Hey Yugi are those drugs I'll take one." A fellow classmate of Yugi, Kentaro Michelle quickly snatched one of the pills from Yugi's hand.
"Hey, Kentaro, give that back. I'll teach you a rare trick of the Egyptian card game from my Gramps' game shop!"
"I don't care about that stupid crap and I never will its just boring stupid crap." Just then Kentaro gulped the pill down with a swig of milk and belched, laughing while continuing.
"Thanks, Yugi. It didn't really taste like anything though so why'd you give it to me." Just then, mincing no words, Kentaro's faced started to turn a woozy green color.
"I gotta take a shit." Kentaro ran out of the cafeteria while clenching together his cheeks, so that he would not spit out any food.
If that's what one will do, then what would four do?
As Yugi ate his lunch, he watched Kaiba come into the lunchroom, albeit a bit late. Kaiba sat down at his lunch table with all of his friends. Bodyguards #1, #2, #3, #4, #5, #6, #7, and #14.
How in Dark Ruler Hades am I going to do this?
An idea popped into Yugi's head.
"Well hello Kaiba. Let's duel!" Yugi had walked over to Kaiba and his bodyguards' table. Kaiba was eating a fanciful feast of filet mignon, lobster tail and caramelized pears with raspberry glaze.
"I have more important things to attend right now, Moto." Normally Kaiba would accept a duel challenge from Yugi any time, but not now. He felt relaxed after making amends for what he did.
What is wrong with this guy today? He's never turned down a duel challenge. Not from anyone. Even against Tea's pathetic deck. I'll just go with plan B.
"Whooops!" Yugi dropped his entire deck of cards in Kaiba's lap. Just as Kaiba was distracted, Yugi shoved the pills into the lobster tail and caramelized pears.
"Go take your worthless cards somewhere else, geek." Kaiba threw yugi's cards all over the floor, fuming at Yugi's apparent attempt to humiliate him.
This fool is embarrassed that I turned down his duel.
"Sorry, Kaiba! Gotta go!" Yugi exited through the cafeteria doors, anxious for
Seto Kaiba to come running out to use the bathroom.
His bodyguards had better not follow him. Knowing Kaiba, he'd never
want them to hear him dropping a totally rancid turd.
"Mr. Imadori! I have to go to the bathroom!" The class laughed at Tea's childish
words.
"Ms. Gardner, first you come in the class late and then you have to use the bathroom? Very well, but make it fast!" Tea rushed from the classroom down the winding hallways to the cafateria. She was determined to stop her plan from going through.
"That lunch was boring as usual." Kaiba finished the entire lunch. Working extra hard
at school and work multiplies a guy's appetite exponentially. Kaiba's stomach began
to rumble and make gurgling noises soon after finishing his last bite.
What in Exodia is that?
"OH SHIT!" Kaiba knew what was coming. He had to get out of the cafateria pronto. He clenched his cheeks together - so that he would not curse and embarrass himself in front of his classmates. Running as nimbly as he could, Kaiba charged through the cafeteria doors towards the school bathroom. His bodyguards followed closely behind.
"Stay back, you idiots!" Kaiba could not afford for his bodyguards to see this. They'd be cracking jokes behind his back forever. He'd be a fool in their eyes.
"We got it, boss."
"OH SHIIIIIIIIIIT!" Kaiba had never used the bathroom at school before. He thought it was for commoners, but it was either in his $5,000 leather pants or in the crapper. He chose the crapper.
Yugi, ducking behind a janitorial trashcan, saw Kaiba running at the speed of harpie lady towards the bathroom. Yugi followed 15 feet behind, maintaining a safe distance so that Kaiba wouldn't catch him.
"Yugi!" Tea was trailing behind Yugi by about 10 feet.
"What the hell do you want? I'm doing exactly what you're forcing me to, Tea."
"Yugi!" Tea was exasperated from running all the way from her classroom, but continued -
"Y-Yugi! You need to stop! I don't want you to do it anymore." Tea sounded sincere in her words, but Yugi did not trust her one bit.
"You're just playing with me, Tea. I know what I have to do. Don't get in my way." Yugi pushed forward at a supersonic speed catching up to Kaiba just as he was enterting the bathroom.
Tea rushed at her top speed to catch up to Yugi catching up to Kaiba.
"Say cheese, Kaiba." Yugi, being nimble and spry, was able to climb to the top of the stall next to Kaiba's by standing on the toilet. Shit was all over the toilet seat. This was explosive diarrhea. Nasty shit indeed.
"YUGI!" Kaiba was in shock. This just must be a dream, a nightmare, anything but reality. No, it was reality and this was Kaiba's fate. His tighty whities had been pulled down and covered in liquidy diarrhea shit. Kaiba flushed the toilet as he sat on it to get rid of any evidence before he stood up, but it overflowed.
"Noo! Kaiba! I'm so, so, sorry!" Tea rushed into the bathroom, only to be greeted by the smell of a liquidy, sticky glob of shit leaking on the floor.
"Smile some more, Kaiba! Open up those cheeks and SMILE!" Love, hate, pleasure, pain. Yugi's chest swelled with all of the most carnal desires of the human condition. He could and would not stop snapping pictures of this calamity. Snap, snap, snap snap, faster and faster Yugi clicked, in a delirious state of laughter and tears. His millenium puzzle vibrated furiously with each passing second. Its normally shiny, glossy exterior glowed an ominous golden-violet hue.
"Oh god...Yugi. I did this to you. Y-you never asked for this." Tea fell on her knees, ignoring
the ever-nearing spread of brown liquid on the floor.
"Yugi! What the, ugh, hell are you doing?" Kaiba wanted to strangle the little, spiky-haired Moto.
"Oh, Kaiba, Kaiba, Kaiba. You think this was my plan? I think it would be in your best
interest to consult with the girl crying on the floor." Yugi's voice sounded deeper, more mature. His violet eyes were no longer soft and caring, but vengeful and mature beyond their years. This was not Yugi. No, whoever this was, whatever this was, came from within Yugi's millenium puzzle.
"Yugi! Stop it!" Tea, no longer feeling sorry for herself, shakily stood up from her kneeling position. Noticing the liquid diarrhea all over the floor, she made her way over to the stall in which Yugi remained.
"Stop or I'll what, girl? This WAS your idea after all. It was Yugi's destiny to be here, doing this, today."
"You've gone insane, you sick freak! Kaiba, I'm coming to help you!" With her long, graceful dancer legs, Tea jumped over the slimy excretion covering the bathroom tiles. She jumped on the same toilet on which Yugi currently stood and spun him around by the shoulders. She pleaded with him -
"Please Yugi... I- I needed to get him back for what he did to me, but I-I'm not angry anymore. You must understand, Yugi. You're such a good friend and you've always been here for -"
"Silence your tongue before I decide to cut it off myself." Tea grabbed Yugi's shoulders, shaking him violently.
"Come on! This is crazy! Let's just go back, before I did this. Back to normal! Back to your grandp-" Yugi pushed Tea off the toilet tank, sending her crashing face first into the hot, steaming diarrhea. Her beautiful cerulean eyes were now covered in a thick coating of the shit.
"I told you to keep your mouth closed, bitch." Yugi jumped off the toilet tank, joining Tea in the fecal mud. Grabbing her arms, he turned her around so that she faced him and unzipped his tight leather pants.
"Ahhhhhhh! - ack!" Tea tried to scream, but diarrhea flooded her sensory organs. Tongue and shit collided. She knew that she couldn't do a thing. She was weak.
"I'll take these." Yugi tore her panties off with great force, scratching her inner thigh as they were removed. Tea would not... could not allow this.
"Get the...fuck off me!" The petite brunette pushed Yugi off with all of her might, ending up on top of him; his huge hair now dripping with the anal chocolate.
"Ooh, I like a game of rough and tumble. It's been a long time coming." Yugi flipped over so that he was on top ofTea. Tea then pushed Yugi so that she was on top. This continued in a rolling motion for about 20 seconds; both of them covered from hair to toe in Kaiba's rancid shit. With one final push, Yugi was out on top. The blue-eyed girl was powerless under the body of the ancient power-infused Yugi Moto.
"Whatda hella ya' doin', Yug?" Just as "Yugi" was about to force himself into Tea, Joey miraculously showed up. Joey pushed Yugi off of the crap-rolled girl. Tears streamed down her poopy cheeks, leaving a clean trail straight through the patch of Kaiba's doodoo.
"Joey. That's not Yugi. He's-that's a monster." Tea burst into tears, watching as Yugi slowly rose from the floor.
"Joey? Tea? What-what happened? Oh my god, something smells awful." Tea scrambled over to Yugi, placing her delicate yet dung-smeared hands on Yugi's cheeks.
"Yugi, I, I don't know how to say it. I'm so, so sorry. For taking your grandpa's card, for threatening you, for everything. I knew it was wrong, but was blinded by my hatred for Set- I mean, my hatred for Kaiba. Could you, would you please find it in your heart to forgive me?" Tea placed her hands over her heart.
"Tea, Yugi, what happened between yous guys?" Joey joined them in their kneeling positions on the floor.
"Nothing, Joey. Nothing happened." Yugi put his hand on Tea's, and Tea placed her hand on Joey's. Yugi continued -
"Tea, let's just forget about it, okay? I just want to go home. With you, with Joey an-"
Just then, Tristan entered the bathroom, he'd heard part of their dramatic conversation.
"You guys realize you're covered in Kaiba's poopy, right?" Yugi and friends all had a big chuckle at that.
"...YUUUGI!" Kaiba emerged from the bathroom stall.